Esther Levy-Chehebar
Back when SBH was in its infancy and the only uniting principle was to visit the sick and elderly in hospitals, Fred Bijou walked into the room of a man he respected very much; there he found Hacham David Shammah in a “snake pit” ward, surrounded by seven other patients. The situation was intolerable to Fred. He realized he needed to do something, ASAP. In addition to mobilizing more volunteers, SBH’s financial committee – as it was then called – began fundraising. It wasn’t easy. Many did not believe that such poverty existed in our community, let alone the very real pandemic of loneliness. Others were ashamed to admit that they knew somebody in need or were resistant to the idea all together. With tenacity and perseverance, SBH was finally able to raise the funds and move Hacham David Shammah home as well as hire a nurse to care for him. And SBH as we know it was born.
As of 2023, SBH houses over a dozen divisions which address everything from fertility to career choice to medical and senior services. There are over 75 therapists in SBH’s employ and the organization fields, on average, 300 calls a week from community members in need of assistance. At times, it can feel impossible to identify which moments propelled SBH from one stratosphere to the next. But one thing is certain: the SBH of today exists because somebody knocked on a stranger’s door.
“Fred Bijou created something from nothing, and he did it with a lot of pushback.” – Barbara Matalon
Mickey’s List
Barbara Matalon and Gloria Bijou are a part of SBH’s DNA. They began visiting patients in the hospital together with their husbands, and were present at those very first meetings in Fred Bijou’s living room. At the time, Barbara Matalon was just twenty-two years old and had three young babies at home. Still, SBH’s mission was a calling she could not walk away from.
Barbara had been doing hospital visits for a few months when Mickey Kairey’s list changed everything. Mickey and Barbara were in the car on the way home from a hospital visit when he turned to her and said, “You know, there are people at home that you really need to visit. Start with this one.” Mickey had been entrusted with a list of widows and orphans that originated from Ma’oz La’ebyon in Syria. Quietly, and on his own, Mickey had been taking care of scores of people, community members who were privately suffering, hidden from the mainstream. Together with Linda Benun and Gloria Bijou, Barbara Matalon began taking on cases from that original list.
From Hospitals to Homes: Hidden in Plain View
Every SBH client was connected to a mainstream community person in some way or another; it just wasn’t spoken about. Not only that, many were skeptical that the need for a social services organization in our community existed at all.
On their very first home visit, Barbara and Linda trekked up five flights of stairs to visit an elderly woman with no siblings. With no hired help or childcare at home, Barbara and Linda brought their babies along, as they would continue to do on most visits. The client, a 97-year-old lovely lady who stood no taller than four feet tall, opened the door with great excitement, “You came to visit me? How lucky am I!” Barbara still remembers how the woman cooked an entire shabbat meal in countless tiny pots, all for herself. “Everything was a beracha to her.” Barbara recalled.
The pair did everything from offer mental and physical support, to washing dishes…
Barbara recalled one particularly difficult visit: “We rolled up our sleeves and began scrubbing pots as [the client] lay under piles of covers because she had no heat. There were tins of cat food all over the floor and no cat to be found. When we asked her why she simply replied: ‘Because it’s cheaper.’”
“The captains would catch things. One woman was smart enough to realize her client had a stroke when nobody else had noticed. Indeed, he did have one and was able to get help.” – Barbara Matalon
Seeing Results in Real Time
On another hard visit, Barbara and Linda decided to leave their children at home. They knew that this case would be tough, even for them. They knocked on Rosie’s door, but nobody answered. They knocked some more, and could hear shuffling coming from the other side of the door. They continued to wait until finally, Rosie had dragged herself across the floor to open the door. The sight was shocking. The floor was soiled and the apartment was a mess. But Linda and Barbara continued the visit and told Rosie that they would be back again next week. The following week they knocked on the door, expecting the same wait and litter on the other side. Instead, Rosie answered the door immediately, fully dressed, her makeup and hair done. The apartment was completely clean. In just one week they had seen what their visit had done for this client.
“Every day we would say, ‘we have to get ‘x’ done, we would go one quarter of the way and Hashem would take us the next three quarters.” – Barbara Matalon
SBH was barely a year old when Passover rolled around, and the harsh reality that many clients would not be able to have a seder, materialized.
What would it take to make a seder plate for each one? The team wondered. Ideas began firing off at all cylinders.
We’ll make the berachot!
Gloria will cook the meals!
What would it cost?
$2,000: Money they didn’t have.
The next day, Fred Bijou opened his mail slot to find a banker’s check for $2,000. They never found out where it came from. But in the years that followed small miracles like this would happen time and time again, helping SBH attain the unattainable.
The Home Visit Crew Recruits Volunteers
Barbara, Linda, Gloria, and Sandy Esses all juggled young families while visiting 1-2 times a week. They realized they needed to recruit more volunteers. Barbara soon had seventy women in her living room eager to help. Hacham Baruch’s wife was one of them. Gloria Bijou’s mother-in-law was another.
The Youth Get Involved
During the early days of visiting SBH operated out of its original office at 530 Avenue R. Linda and Gloria decided to try and involve the high school students by prompting them to make Purim packages. This led to the students delivering the packages and paying a visit at the same time. It’s difficult to imagine just how revolutionary this was. Today, there are countless community organizations and individuals who make and deliver packages for any and all occasions. However back then, it wasn’t nearly as common, if at all! The kids were inspired to do hesed and learned invaluable life skills in the process; how to be compassionate, respectful and inclusive of those different from you.
50th Anniversary Gala
On Monday, November 18th, SBH is hosting its 50th Anniversary Gala honoring the past and current presidents of SBH. To learn more about the dinner and journal sponsorship opportunities, contact Charles@sbhonline.org or visit www.sbh50.com.