Victor Cohen
There are families in our community who struggle to put food on the table. It might seem impossible to believe, given the prosperity our community has seen. However, for some, even meeting the most basic of expenses is a challenge.
They just barely get by, unable to afford nice meals for Shabbat and holidays. And they struggle not only to feed their children – but also, heart-wrenchingly, to explain why their family isn’t as comfortable as the one next door, or down the block.
As hard as it might be to believe, even here in our community, which has been blessed with such prosperity, there are people struggling to buy food.
Thankfully, organizations exist to help support those who are in need. One organization has – for over 26 years – assumed the specific responsibility of ensuring that every family, no matter how dire their financial straits, will enjoy large, festive meals every Shabbat and holiday. And now, this organization – Tomchei Shabbat – is reaching out and asking us to help it help the people who need it.
An Empire of Hesed on the Jersey Shore
The Lakewood-based Tomchei Shabbos organization is a $14-million undertaking, quietly – without much fanfare or publicity – supporting over 2,400 families at different levels, depending on each family’s specific financial needs. They have a warehouse for the weekly/monthly deliveries, whatever the family requires. They also include special packages for the holidays. Lines extend out into the highway consisting of people – including some from our community – waiting for food to give their families.
What sets Tomchei Shabbat apart from other organizations is that they directly provide food, rather than distribute funds. Tomchei Shabbat leverages both their infrastructure and location to provide the most food that they can at minimal cost to them. They work efficiently to get the most for every dollar they raise, and they keep everything quiet to preserve the dignity of their beneficiaries. For 26 years, this special organization has – under the guidance of numerous prominent rabbis of our community – helped struggling families enjoy Shabbat and holidays the way these occasions are meant to be enjoyed.
Tomchei Shabbat’s involvement in our community began when Rabbi Bension Kaye saw the unfortunate need, and would deliver Pesach meals to 35 families before the holiday. Unfortunately, the number of families in need grew over time. Tomchei Shabbat would always be there to help pick them up.
There was a shift around Pesach last year, in 2025. The families in need kept growing. After discussions involving Rabbi Kaye and the other rabbis of the Jersey Shore, a new Sephardic division of Tomchei Shabbat was established. Abe Tawil was appointed Director of Development, and Tomchei Shabbat of the Jersey Shore was born.
The Jersey Shore division hit the ground running, running weekly fundraisers, actively reaching out to donors, and building partnerships throughout the community. Baruch Hashem, thanks to the many generous donors and to the selfless volunteers, over 150 families received the assistance they needed.
Local schools also joined the effort, with students participating in packing food boxes destined for families throughout our community, thereby expanding this initiative into a large-scale educational workshop on true hesed.
The enthusiastic response to the new project showed yet again something that we’ve all known for a long time – when our community is made aware of a genuine need, people step forward to help.
The Highest Form of Tzedakah
“When we help others welcome the Shabbat, we’re welcoming blessing and peace into our homes,” says committee member Hymie Dana. “Supporting Tomchei Shabbat is definitely a source of blessing for our homes.”
“Helping to feed those in need is one of the biggest mitzvot,” Ricky Esses, who is heavily involved with Tomchei Shabbat, added, “but giving a sense of joy and hope to these families on Shabbat and holidays is the greatest mitzvah. We must continue taking care of our community, and we must first start with those most in need. Tomchei Shabbat of the Jersey Shore does that.”
The new division’s work quickly earned the support of numerous community rabbis.
Rabbi Shaul Kassin said, “Tomchei Shabbat gives a tremendous amount of relief to these families who cannot imagine what they are going to do for Shabbat.”
“There are families in our community that live down the block from you and me who can’t look forward to Friday night,” Rabbi Joey Haber said. “Tomchei Shabbat will ensure that every family in Deal is able to have the gift that all of us have.”
“There are families who, unfortunately, don’t know what they’re going to do this coming weekend,” Rabbi Joseph Dana said. “What am I going to do to put chicken, wine, and challah on the table?”
Rabbi Moshe Douek added, “I personally know many people who are so relieved once they receive the boxes from Tomchei Shabbat, like a huge stress is taken off their head.”
“It is imperative for us to support Tomchei Shabbat because they support our community,” Rabbi Eli Mansour said. “Tomchei Shabbat embodies the highest form of tzedakah,” Rabbi Avi Harari enthused, “Giving with such discretion and dignity that families can rebuild their lives without shame, knowing their community stands behind them in their time of need.”
Rabbi Reuven Semah describes Tomchei Shabbat as “an organization that provides vital assistance to the families in need in our Jersey Shore community,” emphasizing in particular “their food distributions during holiday times when expenses are high.” The rabbi implores community members to donate generously to this important cause.
A Nuclear Power Plant of Hesed
Tomchei Shabbat of the Jersey Shores’ annual event was graciously hosted this past summer at the home of Ricky and Monique Chera, whose son, Stanley R. Chera, is very involved in the organization.
It was a beautiful gathering that brought together community leaders, Rabbanim, donors and supporters from across the Jersey Shore – all united around one common mission: making sure that no family in our community goes without the basic necessities for Shabbat and Yom Tov.
Stanley opened by thanking Hashem for giving him the opportunity to help out with this organization. “This organization is not something we should ever take lightly,” he said. He thanked everybody for coming, thanked his parents for hosting, and introduced Abe Tawil to speak.
The next speaker was Abe Tawil, who expressed his appreciation for Stanley’s dedication to this endeavor and for all his behind-the-scenes efforts on behalf of Tomchei Shabbat. Abe also thanked the community’s rabbis for their leadership and for helping struggling families throughout the Jersey Shore.
Shmuel Kairy spoke next, and he shared an emotional personal story.
“When I was in Israel for my son’s bar mitzvah, I was in a yeshiva called Yakirei Yerushalayim, led by Rabbi Yehuda Cohen. I saw some boys wearing disheveled clothes, and I told the rabbi that it’s not kavod haberiyot [human dignity] for boys to walk around like this, with ripped clothes. I took money out of my pocket and asked the rabbi to get this money to the parents. The rabbi took a moment and then replied, ‘I need to tell you really what kind of aniyut [poverty] they suffer.’
“He pointed at a boy and said, ‘See that boy? He came to school last month with a 103 fever. I asked him why he came to school when he was so sick, why his mother would send him to school with a 103 fever. He said, ‘My mother forced me to stay home. But I told her, if I don’t go to school, I don’t eat for the day. I was starving. The only meal I get a day is in school. I have to go eat. I’ll come home after I eat.’ And so, the boy left with a 103 fever to go to school to eat. I personally walked him home, and I saw there was nothing in the house. There are people out there that have real needs.’”
Shmuel then related that a certain Rosh Kollel told him of a sign that one of the avrechim (married students] hung up in the Kollel. It read: Does anybody want to split a chicken with me for Shabbat? I can’t afford to pay for a whole one.
“There are stories like that out there,” Shmuel said. “Tomchei Shabbat makes sure that we don’t hear those stories. They are prepared and they are geared up and they are mobilized to make sure that the people have what they need. We are fortunate that we are able to support this organization. We are living in a nuclear power plant of hesed. We do so much hesed in this community.”
Rabbi Shlomo Diamond spoke next, noting that there is a “tremendous need” in the community for this kind of work. “Although you might not think there’s a need,” Rabbi Diamond said, “there really is such a need. There’s a segment of people in our community who really have problems putting food on the table.”
Rabbi Diamond then expressed his gratitude to Stanley and his parents for hosting the event, recalling his close relationship with Stanley’s grandfather, Stanley Chera, a”h. “I grew up with him, we were friends all the years,” he fondly reminisced. “And although we went in different ways, we went and grew in the community.”
The next speaker, Rabbi David Haber, said that while although some things in life are debatable, there are some that are not up for discussion. One of those things is a teaching in the work Pele Yoetz: “Every person is commanded to treat their fellow man like his own body part.”
Why, the rabbi asked, does the Pele Yoetz use this particular comparison – to a part of one’s own body? Why did he not urge us treat our fellow as a friend or family member?
Rabbi Haber explained that when we feel very hungry, we don’t say that we “want” to eat, but rather that we “need” to eat. This isn’t something we want to do – like wanting to go to a certain place for vacation, or wanting to live in a certain kind of home. Food is something we absolutely must have when we’re hungry.
Some people think that food isn’t as much of an issue as others. “Food? What are you talking about? Food isn’t a real problem! That’s not an issue for us.” Rabbi Haber says that this is a mistake. “Every Rabbi here can tell you that they know somebody who receives food from Tomchei Shabbat. They have names. They have spouses. They have children. They will probably sit next to you in shul. Over 150 families in our community use Tomchei Shabbat.”
Harry Adjmi closed the day by speaking about the amount of good the organization has done. Mr. Adjmi helped fundraise for Tomchei Shabbat, as well.
Tomchei Shabbat continues to do more, for now and the future. The demand for it has not gone away, but has increased, instead. People come to Tomchei Shabbat at their lowest, and it’s up to Tomchei Shabbat to help give these families the support that they need to get back on their feet.
Whatever it is – whether a parent passes away, or the father loses his job, Tomchei Shabat is there to pick people up and help them rise once again, granting them much-needed dignity and discretion while doing so. It is a beautiful organization, and B”H, Tomchei Shabbat of the Jersey Shore will have the means to aid anybody who calls on them for help.