HOW IT ALL GOT STARTED
Pnina Souid
Once, while learning Parashat Vayera a number of years ago, the Mitzvah Man was inspired by Hashem’s visit to Avraham when he was recuperating from his brit milah. The Mitzvah Man concluded that if Gd thought that bikur holim is such an important mitzvah that He does it himself, then it must be a very important mitzvah for us to do, as well.
He thought of the best way to do this hesed and decided to visit hospital or nursing home patients.
He collected a list of several hospital patients, and headed to the hospital where they were admitted. In the lobby he bought get-well cards and wrote a personal get-well message for each patient he visited. He included his name and phone number, adding: Please call me when you get out of the hospital. Maybe I can do an errand for you?
The patients were so touched and so excited to receive a caring visit. The card was the cherry on top, as it created a personal connection..
After visiting patients, the Mitzvah Man would return to the lobby to say Tehillim for everyone on his list.
But he thought: how can I maximize this mitzvah? Like any salesman, he wanted better results.
In addition to hospital visits, he became a volunteer for Sephardic Bikur Holim.
SBH provided him with a list of hospitals and homes to visit. Each patient received his personal card and on Thursday and Friday visits he brought Shabbat flowers.
When he started receiving calls, he knew he was doing something right.
SBH saw the Mitzvah Man’s commitment and success and sent him to visit prison inmates. Next, he was assigned to visit severely mentally ill patients in locked wards of psychiatric hospitals. Many had no family. The Mitzvah Man brought cookies and coffee, cards and flowers. Most visits lasted about twenty minutes.
The Mitzvah tuned into whoever he visited, determining if he should make the visit shorter, or stay longer. He looked for cues for how he could engage those he visited in conversation. If a game show was on TV, he would start a conversation about the show. If he noticed a book on the table, be it a religious or a secular book, he would start a conversation about what they were reading. Talking about something they were already interested in was a tool he used to create a connection.
The Mitzvah Man started visiting 10 people a week, then 20. At the end of two years, he had visited 500 people!
The visits became a central part of his life.. He felt “addicted” to them! If he didn’t visit, he missed doing so, and did not feel good.
People he had visited called him to do errands and pay visits. His base was Brooklyn. He did not venture to Manhattan to make visits until SBH gave him a list of four people to visit at NYU. Since each of the four patients were in different buildings, he took the day off to allow him time to go from one building to the other.
As fortune would have it, the first patient had been released the night before. He felt disappointed, but went to see the next patient. After waiting for 30 minutes, he began to get irritable but quickly reminded himself: don’t get irritable, you came to do a mitzvah. Then he found out she had been released, too.
He changed his attitude. Wouldn’t it be great if all the patients he came to see were able to go home! He thought: the attitude is up to you and the outcome is up to Hashem! I am doing holy work. The third patient was released, and he prayed for the fourth patient to be released, too. Yes! That patient had been released also. The Mitzvah Man left with a huge smile on his face, knowing he was working for Hashem.
After being crowded out of the elevator to the lobby, he calmly waited for the next one. When he arrived at the lobby a woman from the community recognized him and asked why he was there. He responded that he visits patients. She excitedly asked if he could visit her husband who was having major surgery in ten minutes. Of course, the Mitzvah Man visited him, gave his wife his card, and reassured them. “See how Hashem works! He saw my desire to visit and fulfilled it,” he said.
The Mitzvah man concludes, “I learned that when we do a mitzvah – do it with all your heart. This is how I came to give the cards with my phone number, bring flowers if the visitation was close to Shabbat, and say Tehillim for everyone that I visited.”