One on One with Miriam Barry

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ELLEN GELLER KAMARAS  

Our most important work at SEARCH is explaining to parents their children’s strengths and weaknesses, so they understand why a child can succeed in one area but fail in another. We often see the light bulb go off when they understand that their smart child has a particular weakness that impacts their ability to learn.  Those ‘Aha’ moments are what make my job so fulfilling.”   

We are blessed to have a dynamic, energetic, smart, and compassionate leader like Miriam Barry in our community. She is a woman who possesses poise, intelligence, positive energy, and an eloquent speaking style. 

Her use of clever analogies resonated with me and helped me understand the issues she was describing.  In addressing life’s challenges, she said, “I don’t write the script; I just read the lines.” 

 

Growing up 

Miriam was born in Rochester, NY, to Rabbi Shlomo and June Nahmod Cohen, the third of six siblings. Her father was born in British Mandated Palestine to Moroccan parents, and his semicha (rabbinic ordination) was from Yeshivat Porat Yosef in Yerushalayim. June was born in the U.S. to Syrian parents. The two met at a rally for the fledgling nation of Israel in 1947.  

Rabbi Shlomo Cohen served as the only Orthodox upstate mohel, and oversaw Rochester’s kashrut, among his many roles in the community.  

June came to Rochester as a young rabbi’s wife, ran the synagogue ladies’ auxiliary, volunteered for the day school, yeshiva, and hevra kadisha, and so much more.  

Miriam’s parents were her greatest mentors. “We were always hosting guests, taking care of people who got stranded in snowy Rochester winters, managing a variety of religious communal needs, and being there for others. It’s no surprise that we’re all in education or community service.”    

Miriam has fond childhood memories of the eight-hour drive in the summers from Rochester to Brooklyn, to visit her maternal grandparents for two weeks.  

She attended the local Hillel School until seventh grade, then public school for two years.  For tenth grade, her parents enrolled her in Bais Yaakov School for Girls in Baltimore, Maryland, where she boarded with a local family through twelfth grade.   

Miriam was a quiet child who came out of her shell when her late uncle, Joe Nahmod, a”h, gave her a guitar.  “I became quite proficient and led the high school band, sang in the high school choir, and separately performed often for the school with a singing partner.”  

Miriam was a good student and thrived at Bais Yaakov despite missing her family.  Miriam babysat and gave guitar lessons to earn spending money, understanding the financial sacrifices her parents made to send her to yeshiva.  Only when she became a mother did she understand her parent’s emotional sacrifice.  

Miriam believes she was the only Sephardic girl at Bais Yaakov then and became “bilingual,” adept at Sepharadi inflection as well as Ashkenazic.  “I joke that I can make a mean kibbe, excellent samboussak, but also gefilte fish and cholent.”  

After high school graduation, Miriam studied at Michlala in Israel for one year. There she met her paternal grandmother and her father’s extended family for the first time.  Miriam returned to Rochester to teach first grade at her alma mater, Hillel.   

 

And Then Came Marriage… 

Miriam met her husband Ronny at the first American Sephardi Federation Youth Conference in 1973, in Atlanta, Georgia.  She was representing her congregation and Ronny was in the Syrian delegation of advisers.  Ronny grew up in the Brooklyn Syrian community.  He was an alumnus of Ner Israel Yeshiva in Baltimore.  

They married in July 1974 and lived in Israel for three years. Ronny studied at Porat Yosef Yeshiva where he earned his semicha and Miriam attended another year of Michlala, studying special education until her first daughter, Esther, was born.  After giving birth, Miriam worked at night as a translator at the Jerusalem Post, and tutored at Neve Yerushalayim for Women, until they returned in 1977 to New York with their two daughters. 

They currently live in Brooklyn and have six children, three girls and three boys, in that order (Esther, Reina, Rachel, David, Shlomo, and Ezra).  They all studied in Israel and graduated college. Ezra lives in Israel with his family. 

 

Life in New York 

Upon returning to New York, Miriam worked at Sephardic High School, at the time it was the only community high school outside of Yeshiva of Flatbush.   

Miriam wore many hats at Sephardic High School – in the financial office, as a special ed tutor, as the girls’ tefilla coordinator, managing students’ community service projects, and as an Israeli dance teacher. 

When Sephardic High School closed in 1995, Miriam taught Judaic Studies at Taryag Academy, which opened to accept the students of Sephardic High School.   

Miriam’s life was thrown into turmoil in 1988, when her 12-year-old daughter, Reina, was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. There were few specialists in pediatric brain tumors, and Reina underwent surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy.  

The doctor explained “there really isn’t much research on this tumor.”  He said they would “do their best,” with 50-50 chances for success.  

B”H, after 18 months of treatment, Reina slowly recovered.  

At the children’s clinic, Miriam met parents forming a group to fund pediatric brain tumor research.  Miriam agreed to join, but she could not attend their Friday night meetings. The night was changed to Tuesdays and Miriam’s journey as a board member and other leadership roles at the Children’s Brain Tumor Foundation (cbtf.org), began, lasting 35 years. 

CBTF funded doctoral fellows who now head neuro-oncology departments nationwide and began nationally recognized patient education and support programs.  Their most ambitious project is the Children’s Brain Tumor Network (cbtn.org) at Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, the only entity dedicated to DNA studies of pediatric brain tumors. It has been a game-changer for children with these tumors. Today, 23 member institutions participate in this monumental research effort.  

 

SEARCH and Advocacy  

In 1999, Taryag Academy closed, and Miriam took a break. In Spring, 2001, she answered an ad for a part-time position for the Sephardic Bikur Holim Educational Advocacy program, created by Rachel Shamah. 

 

In creating SEARCH – Sephardic Educational Advocacy and Resources for Children, Rachel worked to destigmatize learning disabilities, brought experts to SBH to educate parents, and advocated vigorously for children to access services in yeshivot.  

 

Miriam spent six intense months learning about advocacy.  Soon, Rachel had Miriam began representing clients at the Department of Education advocating for them to obtain much needed government services. Miriam’s background in education, and experience in patient advocacy at CBTF served her well.  She never imagined being able to advocate effectively for students without being steamrolled by the Department of Education! It was a new, unexpected skill.  When Rachel left SEARCH, Miriam remained to meet the community’s growing needs.  

 

In 2022, SBH recognized the need to expand to NJ, and SEARCH now serves many families in Deal. Presently, about 1,600 children of all ages are helped by SEARCH annually.  The program brings over $13 million in special ed, counseling, and therapy services to our community.    

 

SEARCH supports parents in navigating the Department of Education process and accessing these services. Most significantly, they help parents understand their children’s strengths and weaknesses.  

 

For Miriam, the best part of her job is being in SBH, with dedicated staff and volunteers who do so much for the community – from giving out food, to providing therapy, to running senior citizen programs. They function as an incredible team to improve the lives of others.  

 

Life Balance  

 

“Work/life balance is always a challenge. It takes real work to be able to disconnect and be there for family and friends – and yourself.”    

 

Miriam’s family has always supported and expressed pride in her career.  

 

Regarding working moms, Miriam says, “Having a job has helped my family understand there are many facets to being a woman and mother, and outside interests can enhance, rather than take away, from family relations.” 

  

Pride, Passions, and Purpose 

 

Miriam’s greatest accomplishment is that she and her husband raised six children “who are kind, honest, compassionate, capable, self-sufficient, and concerned about others.  We are proud of them and the children they are raising.”  

 

Miriam’s passions define her and who she is at her core.   

 

Her #1 passion is educational advocacy. A close second is dancing! For 23 years, Miriam taught Israeli and line dance to senior women at the Sephardic Community Center. “I loved my ‘ladies’ and was privileged to teach them.”  She also gave dance classes in Ahi Ezer and private lessons for weddings/semahot. 

 

For fun, Miriam does word puzzles, crosswords, and jigsaw puzzles.  She still takes line and Israeli dance classes and calendars them as “PT.” 

 

Connect with Miriam at miriam@sbhonline.org.  

Ellen Geller Kamaras, CPA/MBA, is an International Coach Federation (ICF) Associate Certified Coach.  Her coaching specialties include life, career, and dating coaching.  Ellen is active in her community and is currently the Vice-President of Congregation Bnai Avraham in Brooklyn Heights.  She can be contacted at ellen@lifecoachellen.com (www.lifecoachellen.com).