Inventions are the clever creations that make our lives easier, more enjoyable, and endlessly fascinating. They turn yesterday’s impossibilities into today’s necessities—things we can hardly imagine living without. From the humble paperclip to the mighty jet engine, each month we’ll uncover the stories behind the world’s most remarkable inventions and the brilliant minds who brought them to life. This month, we dive into the history behind one of the greatest innovations since…

SLICED BREAD

Before the pioneering invention of pre-sliced bread, the daily routine of preparing meals was markedly different. Bread of all kinds – whether a hearty loaf baked at home or a fresh loaf bought from the local bakery – was sold and kept whole, entirely unsliced. This meant that the consumer bore the personal responsibility of cutting off a slice for every sandwich or piece of toast. The resulting cuts were inevitably uneven, thick in one spot and thin in another, creating irregular slices that were notoriously difficult to manage. This constant necessity for manual slicing was time-consuming, especially for a busy household making several sandwiches. And it proved to be extremely difficult to achieve the uniform, thin slices preferred for toasting and attractive presentation.

The Rohwedder Bread Slicer

This culinary challenge began to change in the early 1900s, thanks to the ingenuity of Otto Frederick Rohwedder. Born in Des Moines, Iowa, he and his family moved to Davenport, Iowa when he was young. Rohwedder was a true inventor at heart, despite his primary professional background. A former ophthalmologist who later found success as the owner of three jewelry stores in the town of St. Joseph, Missouri, he was a keen tinkerer who applied his mechanical precision to solving a widespread domestic inconvenience. Rohwedder dedicated years to developing a design for a machine that could automatically slice and wrap baked loaves of bread. He sold his jewelry stores to fund the development effort and manufacture the machines.

His process was methodical. To gauge the ideal thickness for his future product, he conducted early market research by placing advertisements in local newspapers. These ads offered a questionnaire “for the purpose of determining a thickness of slice which would be most nearly universal in acceptance.” The overwhelming response he received – over 30,000 responses from American housewives – underscored the tremendous, if yet unrecognized, demand for a solution to the bread-slicing problem.

By 1912, Rohwedder successfully created a working model of his revolutionary machine. However, his initial prototypes were met with deep skepticism from professional bakers. Their primary concern was simple but critical: they were certain that pre-sliced bread would quickly go stale, thereby ruining the product and their reputation. In an early attempt to address this freshness problem, Rohwedder even experimented with using metal hatpins to keep the freshly cut pieces of the loaf together, hoping the structural integrity would preserve the bread. Unfortunately, the hatpins continually fell out, detracting from the product’s convenience and safety, proving the need for a better solution.

Tragedy, Resilience, and a Perfected Invention

Rohwedder’s decade-long quest for the perfect machine faced a devastating setback in 1917. A fire at a factory in Monmouth, Illinois, which had agreed to manufacture his device, resulted in catastrophic damage. The blaze not only destroyed the existing prototype but also consumed all of Rohwedder’s meticulously drafted bread-slicing blueprints. The loss set his commercial launch back by a full decade, forcing him to patiently recoup his losses and to recreate his designs.

As Rohwedder rebounded and tirelessly perfected his invention, the American kitchen landscape was evolving. Electric pop-up toasters were becoming more popular in homes across the country, which, in turn, fueled a rapidly increasing consumer demand for thin, evenly cut bread for perfect toasting. This new market need provided the final motivation and justification for Rohwedder’s perseverance.

In 1928, Rohwedder finally solved the fundamental challenge of keeping pre-sliced bread fresh. He added an ingenious feature to his updated Rohwedder Bread Slicer that automatically wrapped the sliced loaf in wax paper immediately after cutting. His perfected machine was a complex assembly of multiple blades that divided the loaf into uniform slices before it was tightly bound in its protective wax paper coating, finally ensuring its freshness and convenience for the consumer.

Instant Success and a Lasting Legacy

Despite the elegance of the new design, many bakeries remained hesitant to invest in the large, expensive device, still fearing the bread would spoil. It took a bold risk-taker to prove the concept would work. In July of 1928, the Chillicothe Baking Company of Chillicothe, Missouri, took the chance. They installed Rohwedder’s machine and placed their first sliced loaf on sale under the brand, Sliced Kleen Maid Bread.

The very first loaves of commercially pre-sliced bread appeared on store shelves on July 7, 1928. The product was an instant, overwhelming success. Within weeks, the Chillicothe Baking Company’s bread sales rocketed by an astonishing 2,000 percent! This meteoric rise immediately caught the attention of every baker in the nation, eager to capitalize on the new convenience. Just two years later, in 1930, the industrial giant Wonder Bread began to commercially produce pre-sliced loaves, rapidly popularizing the product and making sliced bread a household staple familiar to generations of American families.

Within five years of Rohwedder’s successful launch, the transformation was complete. The vast majority of bakeries across the United States had purchased and installed bread-slicing machines, and as much as eighty percent of all bread produced by companies in America was sold pre-sliced. The impact was so profound and immediate that it permanently altered the measure of successful innovation, giving rise to the now-famous epithet, “the best thing since sliced bread.” No one is sure who first coined the phrase, but American consumers certainly agreed with its sentiment, recognizing Otto Frederick Rohwedder’s persistent invention as a true milestone in modern convenience.

An Interesting Historical Footnote

The invention’s success was briefly – and controversially – interrupted during World War II. On January 18, 1943, the U.S. government imposed a short-lived ban on sliced bread. This measure, ordered by Food Administrator Claude R. Wickard, was intended to conserve resources, primarily the wax paper used for wrapping the sliced loaves, and potentially the steel used in the slicing machines. The public outcry was immediate and intense. Housewives and consumers, outraged at the loss of convenience, complained bitterly about the time wasted and the bread ruined by uneven hand-slicing. Recognizing the minimal actual savings and the massive disruption to home morale, the ban was quickly rescinded on March 8, 1943, just seven weeks later. The swift reversal only cemented the invention’s importance in American daily life.

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas

It was 5:45am. Jack awoke with stiffness radiating through his lower back. Another morning, another battle just to get out of bed. His physiotherapist had prescribed a daily stretching routine – fifteen minutes of simple, focused movements to manage his chronic pain. Without the stretching, standing through Shaharit would be very difficult and would affect his kavanah. His heart was ready to pray – but his body was not. A question weighed on him: “Rabbi, can I do these stretches before tefillah? And what about on Shabbat?”

Stretching Before Shaharit

The Shulhan Aruch (Orach Chaim 89:3) cautions against engaging in personal affairs before Shaharit, underscoring the principle of directing one’s heart first to Hashem in prayer before tending to personal needs. However, poskim note important exceptions. In an unpublished letter, Hacham Yitzchak Yosef rules that light morning exercise is permitted before Shaharit when necessary for physical function. Citing different poskim, he explains that if the activity is for healing or necessary to allow a person to stand and pray properly it is permitted. Since its purpose is to enable proper avodat Hashem, such activity is itself considered preparation for prayer (see Yalkut Yosef, Tefilla, Siman 89).

Stretching on Shabbat

And what about Shabbat morning? Hacham Ovadia Yosef, zt”l, in Chazon Ovadia (Shabbat, vol. 3, pp. 386–389), permits light stretching on Shabbat, provided it is neither strenuous nor is intended to induce sweating. When performed for general well-being, these movements are not considered uvdin dechol (weekday labor) and are therefore allowed.

More vigorous forms of exercise – running, strength training, or any activity aimed at exertion – are prohibited on Shabbat. As the Gemara (Shabbat 113b) and Shulhan Aruch (O.C. 301:2) explain, the verse in Yeshayahu (58:13) commands us to “restrain your foot on the Shabbat,” indicating that even our manner of walking must differ – it must be calmer, more dignified, and mindful of the day’s kedusha. The Rambam (Hilchot Shabbat 24:4) adds that this precludes running unless it is for the sake of a mitzvah, such as running to get to minyan on time. Gentle stretching that enables one to pray and function comfortably fits within the halacha; intensive workout sessions do not.

When Exercise Becomes a Mitzvah

Maintaining one’s health is not merely advisable – it is a mitzvah. The Rambam writes in Hilchot De’ot (4:1) that “as long as a person exercises and exerts himself, sickness does not befall him, and his strength increases.” In Moreh Nevuchim (3:25), he warns against engaging in activity merely for amusement or physical pleasure. Rather, every action should serve a higher goal. Exercise, when done to maintain vitality and strength for avodat Hashem, becomes elevated – supporting deeper Torah study, more focused tefillah, and acts of hesed performed with energy.

This understanding is reinforced by the Torah’s commandment to guard one’s health: “And you shall exceedingly guard your souls – V’nishmartem me’od lenafshoteichem” (Devarim 4:15). Rav Yochanan Vozner writes that when exercise is medically advised, it elevates physical activity to the status of a mitzvah. With proper kavanah (intention), every therapeutic movement becomes an act of Divine service (Responsa Chayei Halevi, vol. 6:118).

Conclusion

Exercise in Judaism is not about glorifying the body, but is about preserving the vessel that carries the neshama and enables it to fulfill the will of Hashem.

Whether pre-Shaharit stretches on a weekday or gentle movements on Shabbat morning, when done with the intent to serve Hashem more fully, every step, every stretch, becomes sanctified. Jack’s morning stretches reflect preparation to his tefilla, as he recites in the daily berachah each morning: “Baruch zokef kefufim”- “Blessed is He who straightens the bent.” Jack does not merely prepare to face the day, but he prepares to stand upright before the King of kings.

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer, and author on Medical Halacha. He heads the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. His latest book is “Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome.” To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com.

Pnina Souid

Mitzvah Man recently shared the following story of clear Divine intervention. It began with a simple, desperate request.

“I received a call from a mother of eight who was facing an impossible logistics challenge,” the Mitzvah Man recounted. “She did not own a car, meaning every shopping trip required navigating the bus with all the kids and the packages. It had become simply too difficult.”

She asked if the Mitzvah Man Organization could provide her with a car.

“I had to be honest,” he explained. “We don’t typically give out cars. I told her that if I heard about a used car or a donation, I would certainly let her know.”

The First Miracle

A week later, the Mitzvah Man was at the Chinese Auction for Aishel Shabbat, a wonderful organization that provides food for those in need. He noticed the car raffle and decided to buy a ticket.

“I told my daughter, who was with me, that if I won, the car would go straight to this struggling family,” he said. “She laughed and answered, ‘Dad, don’t worry, you’re not winning. Look! There are thousands of tickets in that barrel!’”

Mitzvah Man also publicly shared his intention: if he won the Aishel Shabbat raffle, the car would go to the family that had reached out to his organization.

Two days later, the phone rang. “Mr. Cohen, you won the car raffle!”

He was stunned. He immediately called and the family was overjoyed and extremely grateful. He offered the family a reminder: “Please thank Hashem. I am just the middleman.”

The Unbelievable Repeat

A couple of years passed, and the Mitzvah Man received a similar call from a family he knew well. Again, it was the same situation: the family had a great need for a car for basic errands and shopping. And again, his answer was the same: he would keep an eye out for a used car or a donation.

A few weeks later, a text message arrived from Aishel Shabbat: “Last chance to enter this year’s Chinese Auction car raffle!”

The Mitzvah Man bought a ticket, realizing that the odds of winning twice was statistically extremely unlikely. He once again publicized his intent: if he won the car, he would happily give it to the family who had requested help.

“As far as I was concerned,” he reflected, “it was impossible for me to win a car twice!”

However, as he knew, Hashem is the One who picks the winners.

A couple of days later, the call came from Aishel Shabbat. “Mr. Cohen, you won the car raffle!”

“Are you sure they picked right?” he asked, incredulous.

“Absolutely,” the representative confirmed. “A young girl picks the ticket. She puts her hands in the barrel and closes her eyes. Yes, you won the car!”

The Mitzvah Man called the second family, who were overwhelmed with thanks.

“I told them the same thing,” he concluded. “Thank Hashem. He provides for all our needs – our clothing, our homes, and yes, even our cars!”

Hardly any Torah Jew goes through the Hanukah season without encountering the famous question posed the Bet Yosef – Maran Rav Yosef Karo (1488-1575), author of the Shulhan Aruch – regarding the eight-day celebration of this wonderful holiday.

As we know, Hanukah celebrates two miracles: 1) the supernatural triumph of a small, ill-equipped group of Jewish fighters over the mighty Greek army; 2) the small jug of pure oil which sustained the lamps of the menorah for eight nights. It is commonly assumed, for good reason, that specifically eight days of celebration were instituted due to this second miracle – the oil lasting for eight nights until a new supply of pure oil could be brought to the Bet Hamikdash.

The Bet Yosef asks, very simply, why we celebrate for eight days, given that the miracle occurred over the course of seven days. The Talmud states explicitly that the jug contained enough oil for one night. Hence, the miracle occurred only on the subsequent seven nights, but not on that first night. Seemingly, then, Hanukah should be celebrated not for eight days, but rather for seven days.

This question has yielded a vast, fascinating literature, with entire volumes having been published containing literally hundreds of answers, each of which has been debated and analyzed at length by Torah scholars.

I would like here to present one particular approach which claims that indeed, no miracle occurred on that first night when the menorah was kindled – but this first day nevertheless warrants a celebration because it is what led to the subsequent seven miraculous nights.

“Sleepy” Mitzvot

To explain how, we are going to take a brief detour away from Hanukah to the next holiday on our calendar – Purim.

When Haman approached Ahashverosh to request the king’s authorization for the Jews’ annihilation, he said, “Yeshno am ehad mefuzar umeforad ben ha’amim – There is one nation that is scattered and dispersed among the nations” (Ester 3:8). The Gemara (Megillah 13b) interprets the word “yeshno” to mean “yashnu min hamitzvot” – the Jews were “asleep” with regard to the mitzvot.

It seems that Haman here described the Jews’ laxity and disregard for the mitzvot, that they simply were not sufficiently committed to Torah observance. And, as such, they lacked the merits to be protected from his efforts to destroy them.

But why did Haman use the specific image of sleep? If he wanted to speak of the Jews’ neglect of the mitzvot, why he did he describe them as “sleeping”?

The answer might be that Haman was referring not to neglect, but to lethargy, to a lack of passion and rigor. The Jews indeed observed the mitzvot – but “sleepily,” to get them over with, as items on their checklist.

I am reminded of the time when somebody happened to mention to me that after so many years of putting on tefillin every weekday, he feels as though he could put them on his sleep.

I replied, “You do.”

Most men are basically asleep when they put on their tefillin. It’s of course exciting for a bar-mitzvah boy on the first day he wears tefillin, andthe next day, and the next couple of weeks, perhaps the next month or two – but eventually this mitzvah loses its luster, its excitement, and it becomes just another chore.

This, then, was Haman’s claim to Ahashverosh – that the Jews were vulnerable because their mitzvot were “sleepy,” lacking enthusiasm and zeal.

If so, then the Gemara is making a truly astonishing statement – that our lack of enthusiasm when performing mitzvot puts us at risk, that even if we obediently do what the Torah requires of us – like the Jews at the time of the Purim story – we could be undeserving of Gd’s protection if our observance is “sleepy.”

How does this work? Why is excitement for mitzvot such a critical factor?

Transcending the Cycle of Nature

The Ba’al Shem Tov (1698-1760) taught that Gd treats us in a manner that reflects the way we act. A famous verse in Tehillim (121:5) describes Hashem as our “shadow” (“Hashem tzilecha al yad yeminecha – Gd is your shadow on your right side”). A person’s shadow does precisely what the person does; if he outstretches his left arm, the shadow’s left arm will be outstretched. The same is true of Gd. If we act kindly and forgivingly toward others, Gd will act kindly and forgivingly toward us.

Another application of this rule relates to the emotion we invest in our avodat Hashem (service of Gd). It is natural for a person to lack excitement as he goes about his daily routine. Human nature is such that the things we do day in, and day out become uninteresting, and we do them mechanically, by rote, without joy and fervor. Our daily routines in this sense resemble the cycle of nature. We get up and go about our business just as the sun rises in the morning and sets in the afternoon, and like the leaves fall in the autumn and grow back in spring. We get up in the morning and go to the synagogue for shaharit just like nature runs its course.

Applying the Ba’al Shem Tov’s rule, then, we reach the conclusion that our “natural” observance of mitzvot results in Gd governing our lives according to the ordinary course of nature. If we follow the natural course – of going about our daily routine listlessly, without energy or enthusiasm – then Gd responds by subjecting our lives to the routine of the natural cycles.

There are times in our lives when the natural routines aren’t good enough, when we need a miracle that transcends the laws of nature. The doctors say there is no cure; the shadchanim say that there are no more eligible prospects; the industry has changed and the business is no longer profitable. We have all faced situations where the natural course wasn’t good enough, when we needed a miracle. And as a rabbi, I am sometimes approached by people asking me what they could do, how they can make themselves worthy of a miracle. When the regular service isn’t good enough, and we desperately need the “VIP service,” how do we access it?

The answer is that if we break our natural routine, then Gd will, in turn, transcend nature’s routine for us. We access Gd’s “VIP service” by giving Him, as it were, “VIP service,” by extending beyond our natural tendencies. If we perform our day-to-day mitzvot with energy, with vitality, with attentiveness, with enthusiasm – then He will be prepared to break the cycle of nature on our behalf.

When Sarah, our matriarch, learned that she would be conceiving at an advanced age, she laughed in disbelief, wondering how this was possible, given that “adoni zaken – my husband is elderly” (18:12). The deeper meaning of this verse might be that “adoni” – “my Master,” my service of Gd, the Master of the world – is “zaken” – “elderly,” old and stale, unenergetic and lethargic. Sara, like all righteous people, always strove to be better, to find room for improvement, and she felt that she invested insufficient joy and enthusiasm into her avodat Hashem. She therefore figured that she was undeserving of a miracle, of having the laws of nature transformed for her.

The Excitement of Hanukah

With this background, we can return to the question of why we celebrate the first night of Hanukah, when no miracle occurred.

The Bayit Hadash (Rav Yoel Sirkis, Poland, 1561-1640) writes that the Jews were deserving of the Greeks’ persecution “al shenitrashelu ba’avodah” – because of the listlessness of their service in the Mikdash. They performed the service – but dispassionately, without the focus and energy that it deserves. Gd therefore brought the Greeks who raided the Temple, defiled it, and prevented the Jews from using it.

In response, the Hashmonaim reignited their enthusiasm for mitzvot, and were determined to do everything they could to expel the Greeks and restore the service in the Mikdash. On that first night, when the Hashmonaim were finally given the opportunity – for the first time in several years – to perform the avodah (service), we can only imagine their excitement, the love and emotion with which they served. It was this fervor that led them to find the small jug of pure oil with which to kindle the menorah that night.

And it was this passion and excitement that made them deserving of the subsequent miracle. By performing the mitzvah that night with unparalleled enthusiasm, they became worthy of a miracle – and the oil lasted for the next seven nights.

This, perhaps, is the reason we celebrate the first night. No miracle happened on this night – but what did happen on this night brought the miracle that unfolded over the course of the next seven days. On the first night of Hanukah, we celebrate not the miracle of the oil – but the excitement and enthusiasm through which we were deserving of Gd’s supernatural treatment.

Hanukah, then, is a time for us to rejuvenate our mitzvah observance, to inject fervor into our mitzvah routine.

Our daily mitzvah regimen is a great blessing – but also a great challenge. The daily prayers, and even the weekly observance of Shabbat, can become uninteresting and dull. As we light the Hanukah candles, let us try to reignite within ourselves the fire of passion and enthusiasm. Let us follow the example of the Hashmonaim, the example of unbridled devotion and rigor. Let us remind ourselves how privileged we are to be chosen as Gd’s loyal servants, and commit to serve Him to the best of our ability and at the highest standards every day of our lives.

Ellen Kamaras

More than ever, parents are intent on raising resilient children who are equipped to face life’s challenges, both present and future.

Resilience is not a new concept. However, recent events have made us realize the importance of cultivating resiliency. Think back to the uncertainty stemming from the pandemic, the spike in anti-Semitism even before 2020, and the events of October 7^th and the resulting anti-Israel response.

We are raising our children in a rapidly evolving world, one that is very different than the one we grew up in. How can we prepare them to succeed? How can we avoid passing on our own anxiety and discomfort with uncertainty to our children?

Resilience and Pivoting

Let’s provide some context before we delve into strategies.

The words “resilience” and “pivot” became the buzz words of the year in 2020 as individuals, businesses, and not-for-profit organizations assessed their responses to the pandemic and navigated the required changes to their lives and processes. Both concepts were practiced in tandem as we adapted to the new normal.

As Jews, resilience became an essential tool to fight rising anti-Semitism after Hamas viciously attacked and killed more than 1,200 innocent men, women, and children on October 7th. Our resilience required not only perseverance but also the ability to adapt to adverse events.

What is resilience? It is the ability to cope with and recover from setbacks. It is about bouncing back from adversity, learning from setbacks, and adapting to continuous change.

A resilient person has strong coping skills, can marshal their available resources, ask for help when needed, and find ways to manage the situation they are facing.

Pivoting is the process of changing direction when the current strategy is not working. Just like a GPS recalibrates when we take a wrong turn, we have learned to recalibrate and pivot our strategies for surviving daily.

A Hot Topic

Parents and children are living in a world that is in a perpetual state of flux. When change is the norm, adaptability and resilience are critical tools for survival and for strong mental health. We experience global events such as wars, fires, hurricanes, economic fluctuations, technological shifts, and more.

The only thing we can know with certainty is that life will keep throwing us curveballs.

So it is crucial to help our kids develop their resilience and agility.

Home Sweet Home

Let’s start with the home. Kids need to feel safe and secure in their home environment not only physically but also emotionally. Parents want their children to feel safe and comfortable with who they are.

Ideally, we want our children to develop a secure attachment style.  A secure attachment style is created when a child feels confident that their caregiver will be able to provide comfort and safety in times of stress. This pattern of trust continues as they grow into adulthood, generally creating positive, close relationships.

Create a safe space where your kids can explore who they are, share their feelings, and discover what is important to them. This means establishing a stable home environment with structure, routine, and security.For example, kids benefit from predictable schedules for meals, bedtime, play time, and family time.

We want our children to feel safe emotionally at home. To do this we must create a non-judgmental haven. Let kids know they can discuss any issue, big or small, without feeling judged. This means encouraging siblings to make home a judgment-free zone for everyone.

Work on building your children’s self-esteem. Acknowledge and applaud their efforts and accomplishments. Help them learn that mistakes are opportunities for growth. 

Current Events and Exposure to Media

Practice open communication about current events and concerns. Actively listen and be present when your child articulates fears or anxieties. (Yes, put your phone away.) Respond to questions honestly and in as clear and simple terms as you can. Do not dismiss or minimize their worries.

Limiting your children’s exposure to media stressors can help to reduce their anxiety.

Be aware of their media consumption and exposure to adult conversations that might increase their anxiety. 

In discussing current events and other concerns, first think about what you want to say. Strive for clarity, and adjust what you say to what your kids can handle. No easy feat! 

You can start by asking your child what they have heard.  It is preferable to hear about very difficult topics such as death, trauma, or anti-Semitism, from Mom or Dad rather than from another child.  Next, ask your children if they have any questions and how they feel about what has happened. Older kids may ask more questions than younger ones. 

Use age-appropriate but real language.  It is okay if you do not have all the answers or you cannot make predictions.  You can say, “I don’t know the answer, but we could research it.” Determine what your child is really asking.  Do they want more information, or do they need reassurance that you will keep them safe? 

Even your preschoolers may hear about tragic or catastrophic events or have overheard news reports.  Do not assume they have not been exposed.

Provide Space for Questions and Fears

When we help our children navigate the present, we can help them prepare for a lifetime of unknowns.  Give them space to express how uncertainty feels and model calmness.  Clinical psychologist and Professor of Psychology at Roosevelt University in Chicago, Dr. Steven Myers says, “You can certainly talk about possible or likely outcomes. You can even talk about what you hope will happen. But trying to protect your child from uncertainty altogether is not helpful to them.”  

Share basic information and avoid graphic or unnecessary details about tragic situations.  Keep young kids away from graphic and violent images and sounds that pop up on TV and the internet.  Radio news can include violence and frightening information. You may want to switch it off when your young kids are in the car. Be aware of what is out there and talk to your children about what they may hear or see.

It is key for parents to reassure their children that it is normal for scary things to bother them.

Follow up to see if your kids have more questions and notice any difficulties they may be experiencing. Are they having nightmares, are they extra clingy or emotional? 

Mamdani Anxiety

How have you tackled with your kids the election of the first Muslim mayor who has a long history of anti-Israel and pro-Palestinian activism?

A day before the election, the NY Jewish community teemed with anxiety about Mamdani. A day after the election, Rabbi Shlomo Farhi of Manhattan posted a video full of hizuk, positivity, and emunah. We have faced worst and won. He told parents that we do not get to be afraid. We will do what we have to do to keep our families safe. Children look to their parents for safety.

Modeling for Our Kids

Modeling coping strategies and calm behavior to our children is crucial to raising resilient kids. A great resource is the book Between Parents and Child by Dr. Haim Ginott. Published in 1965 and revised and updated in 2003, it is still relevant today, offering a framework for empathetic yet disciplined child rearing. One of his important lessons is about modeling. Dr. Ginott taught that the best way to teach children manners was by using them yourself in their presence.

The American Academy of Pediatrics’ website HealthyChildren.org provides guidance that is consistent with Dr. Ginott. “Children learn by watching everyone around them, especially their parents. When you use manners and good coping strategies, you teach your children to do the same.”

Explain to your children how you deal with your own normal anxieties.

Overcoming Fears Gradually

In addition to anxieties regarding current events, your children may be dealing with other fears. Encourage your children to face their fears gradually. This means supporting them to do what makes them apprehensive, one step at a time, at their own pace. Gradual exposure to something we fear can help us to maintain control and to conquer that fear. It may not be as frightening as you thought. If you panic getting into an elevator one day, for example, try getting back into one the next day and just go up one floor. Remember that anxiety isn’t harmful. Your body’s response to fear, such as sweaty palms or an accelerated heartbeat, is normal. These responses are intended to protect you from danger. It’s beneficial to validate feelings but limit excessive or constant reassurance.

The problem with reassurance is that, in the short term, it decreases your anxiety. However, in the long term, it creates a vicious cycle that worsens your anxiety and increases your need for more reassurance. It may reinforce that you are unable to tolerate the discomfort of the uncertainty.

Focus on building your child’s confidence in his/her ability to cope.

Instead of fixing problems for your children, guide them to think through solutions and ask what they could try next time. 

SIDEBAR: Approaches for Teaching Problem-Solving Skills to Children

Set a good example. Let your children see how you deal with problems.

Involve your child in family problem-solving meetings and encourage him/her to join in solving a small family problem.

Encourage your child to solve their own problems. Standby with support if needed.

Teach your child the following steps:

• State the problem clearly.
• Brainstorm together for some possible solutions.
• Choose what seems like the best solution.
• Try out the solution.
• Review how the solution worked and make any necessary changes.

Ellen Geller Kamaras, CPA/MBA, is an International Coach Federation (ICF) Associate Certified Coach.  Her coaching specialties include life, career, and dating coaching.  Ellen can be contacted at ellen@lifecoachellen.com(www.lifecoachellen.com).

QUESTION: 

Dear Rabbi Ali,

I have a hard time when my husband comes home from work. I need his help as I have been with the kids from the time they come home from school. I believe he should pitch in and do something instead of going to the couch and scrolling on his phone. Is there any way to get through to him that he should help?

R’ Ali’s Response: 

Although your question is concerning how to get your husband to help out, I will address both women and men, as this situation is fairly common. I hear complaints from men regarding the demands made of them, as well.

The first point I’d like to make is that this shouldn’t turn into an issue of wrong and right, into who is the bigger victim. Many couples will debate this to no end. A wife will say that she is home with kids and needs some assistance or attention, and the husband will say that he had such a long day at work providing for the family, and needs to unwind.

Many people take it further and debate whose work is harder, which gets nowhere. The truth is that in many cases they’re both right! (or their complaints are valid). But each is right, not about who works harder, but rather that they both have a need. The man needs to unwind after a long day of work and the wife needs assistance, especially with younger children. Understanding this and discussing this with your spouse as an issue that “we” have and not a “me versus you” issue is definitely the first step towards a viable solution.

Actually, this point is not exclusive to this specific scenario. Many arguments revolve around this theme. One spouse would like to leave early for a wedding, while the other prefers to leave later. They are both different people with different preferences. One will say that coming on time is proper and coming late is not right to the family of the simha. The other will say it’s very uncomfortable to be there early and makes them feel out of place. Many times there is no wrong and right and what is at stake is only a matter of preference. Accepting each other’s differences and working together towards something that makes both parties happy is not that complicated. As I have mentioned, approaching this as an issue that “we” have is much more productive and logical.

One more point before I give you practical advice. Men should understand how hard their wives work and how stressful it is to take care of a house. This includes having dinner ready for a family, keeping a clean house, and supervising homework and bedtime. Women, as well, should understand that men work very hard to support a family. This includes physical and mental exhaustion, many times leaving him unable to “jump in” and help out right away. When both husband and wife truly understand their spouse’s hardships, they will be more sympathetic and gentler while approaching this situation, and of course, many other situations.

So, now what? Well, one very simple idea for you as the wife would be to tell your husband, “ I know you work hard and have a long day, and I am so appreciative. I do need your help or attention when you get home from work. But I also understand that you need time to unwind. Can you give me an amount of time that you need to unwind and after that be available?”

Now, of course, there’s no one-size-fits-all. Every couple will need to be honest and reasonable with the amount of time. When done right I know many people who do this with much success. And vice versa, a man reading this should let his wife know how he understands her and how much he wants to help. He should be able to let his wife know that he needs some time to unwind. 

To conclude, both husband and wife should be realistic in this scenario and all scenarios, for that matter. To say I need four hours to unwind is not reasonable. And for a wife to give a list of endless demands is unreasonable, as well. With some thought and consideration be’ezrat Hashem, you will have a wonderful relationship.

Eddie Esses 

In a year that will long be remembered as a turning point in our community’s civic life, the Sephardic Community Federation (SCF) led an extraordinary effort to mobilize, register, and empower the Syrian Sephardic community as never before. What began as a bold voter registration drive this summer evolved into a historic show of unity and influence that has now firmly established our community as a powerful voice in New York politics. 

From Vision to Historic Results

 The voter registration campaign was spearheaded by Haim Dabah, Marshall Aronow, and Jimmy Salame alongside Senator Sam Sutton and SCF leaders Ronnie Tawil, Eddie Esses, Joey Saban, Joe Mansour, Charles Chakkalo, and Sari Setton. They worked alongside the ground team led Linda Ebani and Rebecca Harary and a phone baking team led by Pascale Kamagi. The campaign began with an inspiring meeting in August at Haim Dabah’s home in Deal, NJ. That evening, leaders from our schools, synagogues, and institutions gathered to launch what would become a movement. Meaningful funding was raised on the spot, and a clear mission was set – to ensure that every member of our community was registered to vote and ready to make their voice heard.

Through tireless coordination and daily meetings, the SCF and its partners carried out a sweeping, multifaceted campaign that included rabbinical proclamations, registration mandates in schools and synagogues, door-to-door outreach, community event tables, and an extensive text-banking program.

The results were truly historic: approximately 15,000 new community members registered to vote, raising the total number of registered community voters from about 25,000 to about 40,000. While an estimated 15,000 community members remain unregistered, the SCF continues its work to reach and register every eligible voter.

Record-Breaking Turnout

The impact of this effort was felt immediately. In the November citywide elections, 43,911 voters turned out in Midwood/Flatbush and our community recorded the large majority of these voters – likely surpassing any previous turnout in our history, including major presidential elections. Total community turnout tripled compared to the previous city election, and our early voting numbers ranked among the top three districts in all of New York City.

The data tells a powerful story: four of the five highest-performing districts for Andrew Cuomo were areas that include our community. This demonstrated beyond doubt that the Sephardic community has become one of the most organized and potent voting blocs in New York. Elected officials across the city and state have taken notice.

Beyond the mayoral race, the community’s influence was reflected strongly as every other SCF endorsed candidate won their race, including Councilmembers Simcha Felder and Inna Vernikov, both longtime friends of our community, as well as Comptroller-elect Mark Levine, a strong ally.

Influence in Action 

The strength of our new civic presence became clear just days after the election. On November 5th, when swastikas were found in front of Magen David Yeshivah, State Senator Sam Sutton and District Leader Joey Saban immediately mobilized state leaders and organized a press conference within hours. They were joined by a large group of elected officials – including Governor Kathy Hochul and Senate Deputy Leader Mike Gianaris – who announced $20 million in new security funding for religious schools.

This extraordinary response did not happen by chance. It was the product of over two decades of relationship-building by the SCF and its partners, alongside the hard work of Teach NYS, which was founded by the SCF to advocate for our yeshivot and institutions. This is what real influence looks like – when our voice is heard, our concerns are respected, and tangible results are delivered for our families.

 The Road Ahead 

The groundwork laid this year will serve as the foundation for the years to come – especially as we look toward the 2026 statewide elections, which will include races for Governor, State Senate, State Assembly, and Congress. With the growing civic infrastructure built by the SCF, and with the possibility of one or two of our own community members appearing on the ballot, the next chapter of our political journey is poised to be even more significant.

The transformation of the Sephardic community’s civic engagement in just a few short months is nothing short of extraordinary. Through the vision of Haim Dabah, Marshall Aronow, and Jimmy Salame, the leadership of the SCF and Linda Ebani, the unity of our institutions and Rabbis, and of course Hashem’s help, our community has demonstrated what is possible when we come together with purpose, strategy, and faith.

Eddie Esses has been extremely active in community political activism for years. He is a board member of SCF and deputy chief of staff to Senator Sam Sutton.