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From the Files of the Bet Din – Right of First Refusal?

The Case

Charles put his private home on the market for sale. Hymie, his next-door neighbor, was interested in the property and offered to match any price Charles received from the outside. By word of mouth, Charles found Ralph, a customer who was willing to pay 2.7 million dollars upfront for the property and go to closing within two weeks. Charles contacted Hymie and notified him of Ralph’s offer.  Hymie agreed to match the purchase price. However, he requested a mortgage contingency contract with a thirty-day window to obtain a loan from the bank. Hymie reassured Charles that he was in good standing with the bank and was probably eligible to receive a loan, but Charles rejected Hymie’s offer in favor of Ralph’s immediate cash payment. Charles signed with Ralph and accepted a deposit for the sale.

Hymie was disheartened by the refusal of his long-time friend and neighbor, and he reached out to other community members to intervene on his behalf. As a result, Charles had a change of heart and verbally agreed to sell his property to Hymie with a mortgage contingency. Charles contacted Ralph and notified him of the latest developments and unilaterally sent him back his deposit.

At first, Ralph refused to hear any of the details of the story and was prepared to enforce his contract. Hymie got involved then, contacting Ralph and claiming that as a next-door neighbor he had a right of first refusal of the property. He further insisted that by Torah law Ralph was required to walk away from the deal. At this point, Ralph did not want the argument to escalate and suggested the matter be resolved in Bet Din. The three signed on for the customary binding of arbitration and presented their cases to our Bet Din.

Who is entitled to purchase the property, Hymie or Ralph?  How should the Bet Din rule and why?

Torah Law

According to the ruling of the Shulhan Aruch, a next-door neighbor maintains the right of first refusal in the event the adjoining property to his home is up for sale. The rationale for this ruling is based on a verse in the Torah that requires one at times to go beyond the letter of the law for the sake of his brother. Since a next-door neighbor stands to gain significantly from purchasing the adjoining property, it is incumbent on an outside buyer to allow the neighbor the right of first refusal. In the event the outside buyer purchases the property without legal confirmation from the neighbor, a Bet Din will elect to evict him from the property, and allow the neighbor to make the acquisition.

The above ruling is subject to numerous provisions and restrictions and a competent halachic authority must be consulted before awarding a neighbor the right to purchase the adjoining property to his home. In instances in which the seller is posed with a disadvantage if he sells to the neighbor and not the outside buyer the law of “right of first refusal” is not applicable. Numerous scenarios are discussed by the great Sages of the Talmud that illustrate common disadvantages, including a neighbor who is willing to match the purchase price of an outside buyer, but requests a mortgage contingency. Since the outside buyer is ready to close immediately the neighbor is denied the right to purchase. Albeit, if the seller is willing to wait for his neighbor to come up with the funds needed, the outside buyer is required to step away from the deal in the meantime.

Leading halachic authorities debate whether the above ruling is applicable in instances in which at first the seller denied the neighbor on account of his mortgage contingency request, only to later change his mind in favor.  Early halachic sources rule that once the seller legally commits to an outside buyer willing to close immediately, he may no longer reverse his decision and sell the property to his neighbor. Since the outside buyer established a legal holding on the property, he is entitled to complete his purchase without moral concern for the neighbor. Although another reputable halachic opinion rules to the contrary, this latter opinion is nevertheless overruled.

 As aforementioned, an outside buyer is removed from the property if he halachically violated the rights of the adjoining neighbor. Nevertheless, in instances in which there is a halachic debate whether a neighbor is presently entitled to evict the outside buyer, the neighbor is rejected. Since the outside buyer is already in possession of the property, the neighbor may not claim rights of ownership in case of a halachic debate of the Sages. Rather the outside buyer in possession of the property can keep his purchase relying on the opinion that supports his position.

Endnotes: Baba Metziah 108b, Shulhan Aruch Hoshen Mishpat 175, Sema 175:7, Teshuvat HaRashba 2:85, Pithei Teshuva 175:11, Divrei Shalom H.M. 8, pg.13, Shulhan Aruch Hoshen Mishpat 175:45.

VERDICT: Too Late

Our Bet Din ruled in favor of Ralph and denied Hymie the neighbor the right to purchase Charles’s home. As mentioned in Torah law, Ralph purchased the home only after Charles legally rejected Hymie because he was unable to close immediately. Since Charles was not required to wait for Hymie to get an approval for a mortgage, and furthermore there was no guarantee the bank would extend him a loan, the law of “right of first refusal” is not applicable. Hence, although Charles later changed his mind, it was simply too late. Once Hymie lost the legal right to purchase, it cannot be reinstated. Hence, Charles is required to accept the return of the deposit and close the sale of his property with Ralph. As mentioned in Torah law, leading halachic authorities rule that although Charles is now willing to sell the property to Hymie his neighbor, at this point, Ralph has no further moral obligation to Hymie and is entitled to his acquisition.

In Loving Memory of Vera Bat Carol, A”H

YOU BE THE JUDGE

The Rightful Heir

Jack wrote a handwritten last will and testament back in 2007. Upon his passing in 2019, the will was found with Jack’s papers in his safety deposit box.  The will was not prepared by a lawyer nor was it notarized or signed by witnesses. Jack simply affixed his signature to the bottom of a briefly written statement. In the will, Jack offered to gift his private home to the child that provides full-time room and board his son Joey, a special child. In 2007 when Jack wrote the will his only daughter was not yet married. In 2019, prior to Jack’s passing, his daughter, then married, took Joey into her home for nearly six months before sending him off to a facility that provides for all of Joey’s needs. Jack’s daughter and son-in-law presented the handwritten document to our Bet Din claiming that their father legally gifted them his home since they provided room and board for Joey. Jack’s two sons acknowledged that they were aware of the document their father wrote before their sister provided room and board for their brother Joey, but they were nevertheless unwilling to transfer the property over to their sister.  The two brothers defended that it was not their father’s intent to gift his daughter the home for a mere six months of room and board. They explained that back in 2007 the circumstances were different and there was a real concern for Joey’s welfare.

Who should inherit the father’s home? How should the Bet Din rule and why?

A New Home for Healing

The Morris I. Franco Community Cancer Center Opens Its Doors to a New Chapter

For nearly thirty years, Nancy Sutton has made sure that no one in the community faces cancer alone. From the very first phone call, she and her team at the Cancer Center have been there – guiding patients and families through one of the most overwhelming experiences of their lives. For many clients, that first call comes during a moment of fear or uncertainty. Although it starts with needing doctors and referrals, the center understands that behind every diagnosis is a person, a family, and a story, and their mission has always been to offer compassion, guidance, hope, and support.

What began as architectural drawings and construction plans slowly transformed into a welcoming, vibrant center designed to serve thousands of people in the years ahead. After years of dreaming, planning, and building, that mission finally has a home that reflects everything it stands for.

The new building, located at the corner of McDonald Avenue and Avenue S in Brooklyn, is nearing its grand opening. For Nancy, the goal was to create an oasis.

“As soon as you walk in the door, you feel relaxed and welcomed,” she says. “Tranquil – that’s the word.”

From the first step, atmosphere sets the tone. Natural light pours through large windows, filling the space with an airy, open feeling. Gentle greenery and warm wood tones create a sense of nature indoors. Throughout the building, the soft sound of a waterfall flows quietly in the background, creating a peaceful rhythm that can be heard from many areas of the center. The effect is immediate – calmness, warmth, and a feeling of serenity.

The environment was designed intentionally to help clients breathe, slow down, and feel supported. Whether someone is coming for support services, a wellness program, or simply to attend a community event, the center welcomes them into a space that feels peaceful and alive.

For many visitors, the building itself becomes part of the healing experience.

Building Vision

The search for the right location took nearly a decade. Once the property was secured, construction – led by general contractor ABECO – spanned more than four years.

Every detail was thoughtfully considered, from the bamboo paneling and expansive atrium to the greenery cascading down the building’s facade.

The goal was not simply to build a medical support facility, but to create a place that feels uplifting and restorative.

“The more you care about every tiny detail, the happier you will be with the final product,” reflects Sam Sutton, chairman of the building committee. “This was a work of love, and the building reflects the love our community has for anyone touched by this disease.”

Architect Michael Goldblum, who worked closely with Nancy throughout the process, designed the space around a two-story, light-filled lobby that serves as the building’s heart.

“No matter where you go, you always know where you are,” he explains. “The building is part of the therapy, part of the process, part of the cure – it’s part of the healing.”

Board member Alan Tobias, who stepped in as project manager during the final stretch, watched that vision come together piece by piece.

“It was like a puzzle,” he says. “All the parts were separate, and then suddenly they came together. That felt very good.”

A Space That Heals

Step inside, and the scope of what has been created becomes clear.

At a spa lounge, with a waterfall and soothing music, acupuncture, Reiki, and reflexology are offered. The peaceful sounds and calming scents in the spa create an environment that immediately relaxes visitors.

In the salon, clients can be fitted for a wig and receive a full beauty treatment. Artisans of wig selection and styling staff the salon. The salon provides a private, uplifting space where clients can feel like themselves again. For many individuals undergoing treatment, these small moments of self-care can restore confidence and provide an emotional boost on difficult days.

There is also a creative expression room where adults and children can heal through art, music, and other creative activities. A full gym and yoga studio are located on the first floor. Yoga classes focus on breathing, calm, and gentle movement, helping participants reconnect with their bodies and find moments of peace during challenging times.

A children’s room provides younger visitors with a space where healing can occur through play and creativity. The room includes games, activities, and music that give children an opportunity to express themselves, relax, and enjoy being kids.

The building includes a café and demonstration kitchen that feels sweet, warm, and inviting. Here, healthy cooking demonstrations are offered regularly, teaching practical ways to prepare nourishing meals. These events are open not only to cancer patients but to the broader community as well, helping everyone learn how healthy choices can support long-term wellness.

Private counseling rooms provide psychological and emotional support for individuals and families, navigating difficult moments. Support groups, wellness workshops, and educational events will take place throughout the year, encouraging open conversations about emotional well-being.

The center will also host social gatherings, holiday celebrations, preventive health care,  and community events designed to bring people together. These moments of connection are just as important as the wellness services themselves, helping people feel less alone on their journeys.

Another special feature of the center is its rooftop garden terrace, a peaceful retreat that offers clients a moment of calm above the activity of the building below. Designed as a quiet sanctuary, the rooftop provides a place where visitors can step outside, take a deep breath, and simply be still. Surrounded by greenery and open sky, the terrace allows clients and their families to enjoy fresh air and natural light in a setting that feels both peaceful and restorative.

Throughout the building, great care was taken to create spaces where clients feel comfortable and respected. The center is designed to offer both welcoming community areas and quieter corners like the medical library, for those who prefer a more personal setting. The center cultivates an environment that supports each person in whatever way they need during their journey.

Interior designer Joy Silvers poured herself into every room – but her connection to the center runs far deeper than design.

She is a former patient – someone who Nancy once guided through both breast cancer and lymphoma.

“I didn’t know if I was going to survive,” she says quietly. “I had a baby who was a year and a half. Now my son is 21, and I’m so blessed. “Working on the building was deeply personal. To see someone who isn’t well walk into a beautiful environment and feel happy – that’s extra special.”

Staff members often see firsthand how meaningful the space can be for clients.

Nina Tawil describes the experience of welcoming people into the building.

“I love seeing the look on the clients’ faces when they walk in the door,” she says. “Showing them this beautiful space always excites me because I know this is a haven for them to come to and enjoy and put their mind at ease while they’re going through trying times. I see the sense of calmness and ease they feel when they walk in.”

A Place for the Whole Community

Claire Cheika, Vice President, reflects, “There’s a genuine sense of warmth here that makes you want to be part of something so meaningful and give as a volunteer.”

Volunteers help assemble welcome packages and thoughtful gifts for clients beginning their journey. They assist with preparing flowers for Shabbat and preparing delicious, nourishing meals. Families facing illness can still experience a genuine sense of support in their day-to-day lives. Volunteers also play an important role in organizing fundraising events, planning community programs, and helping bring the center’s mission to life.

Holiday celebrations and special gatherings throughout the year will continue to make the center a place where people come together for joy and connection.

Educational programs, wellness demonstrations, and community events will encourage people to learn about healthy living, prevention, and emotional resilience. The center hopes to inspire individuals and families to care for their health in meaningful ways.

Built by the Community

None of this would have been possible without the community.

Fundraising was led by Sam Sutton, and support poured in from donors who believed deeply in the mission. Government funding, secured through the Sephardic Community Federation, helped bring the final touches of the building to life.

The builder who worked on the project captured the feeling perfectly:

“This wasn’t just about constructing a functional space. It was about creating somewhere people could feel supported and welcomed during one of the most difficult times in their lives.”

Nancy sums it up simply.

“When I see clients walk in and say, ‘Oh my… we get to come here?!’- that’s when we knew we got it right.”

No single person built this center. It took a team, a community, years of dedication – and Hashem’s helping hand. It is a refuge where people can find peace, strength, and support. And now, at last, it’s home.

The Lighter Side – March 2026

Kosher Compliance

It was Passover and two Jewish attorneys, Saul and David, who worked downtown, met at a food court to have lunch. Saul and David proceeded to produce matzah sandwiches from their briefcases and began to eat.

One of the waiters in the food court marched over and told them, “You can’t eat your own food in here!”

Saul and David looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders, and then exchanged matzah sandwiches.

Morris Z.

Foolproof Logic

Yankele the shoemaker thinks that he is the wisest person in the town, when in actuality, he is the most foolish. In fact, the town folk tell him on a daily basis that he is a fool. One day Yankele hears the rabbi quote from the Bible that the Almighty protects the foolish. Yankele decides that this is his opportunity. “I’ll jump off the highest building in town. If the Almighty protects me then I am truly a fool, but I won’t get hurt, and if I get hurt then I’ll have proven to all that I am a wise man.”  Off he goes, and he jumps off the roof of the town’s only three-story building. Of course, he falls badly and breaks many bones. While the town folk rush him to the hospital they hear him moaning, “I am not just a wise man. I am a genius!”

Michael T.

Doctor, Doctor

A mechanic was removing a cylinder-head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted his cardiologist, Dr. Simon Goldstein, in his shop. Dr. Goldstein was there waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his bike when the mechanic shouted across the garage “Hey Doc, want to take a look at this?”

Goldstein, a bit surprised, walked over to where the mechanic was working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, “So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, repair any damage, and then put them back in, and when I finish, it works just like new.

“So how come I make such a small salary – and you get the really big bucks? You and I are doing basically the same work!”

Dr. Goldstein paused, smiled, and leaned over, then whispered to the mechanic, “’Try doing it with the engine running.”

Lori G.

Busy as a Bee

Two wasps buzz around what is left of a rose bush. “How are you this month?” asks wasp number one. “Not too good,” says wasp two. “Lotta rain, lotta cold. Not enough flowers, not enough pollen.”

The first wasp has an idea. “Hey, why don’t you go down the corner and hang a left? There’s a bar mitzvah going on. Plenty of flowers and fruit.” Wasp two buzzes, “Thanks!” and takes off.

An hour later, the wasps bump into each other again. “How was the bar mitzvah?” asks the info-wasp. “Great!” says buddy-wasp.

The first wasp peers at his pal and wonders out loud, “What’s that on your head?” “A yarmulke,” he replies. “I didn’t want them to see that I was a wasp!”

Marc T.

Impossible Recipes

Danny and Shlomo are older students at the yeshiva and they decided that they were fed up with living in the dorms and the lousy yeshiva food. So they decided to rent an apartment and cook food for themselves.

“Did you get us a cookbook?” Danny asked.

“I did, but I don’t like it,” Shlomo replied.

“Why, are the recipes too hard?” asked Danny.

“Exactly!” Shlomo replied. “Every recipe begins the same way, ‘Take a clean dish and…’”

Susan H.

Shared Suffering

Mr. Stein gives $1 every week to a particular beggar in his town. One week he sees the beggar and gives him only 25 cents. The beggar is indignant and complains,  “Why did you give me only 25 cents?”

Mr. Stein replies: “My business was bad last week.”

The beggar responds: “So you had a bad week and I have to suffer?”

Carol A.

Writer’s Credit

A visitor to Israel attended a concert at the Moscovitz Auditorium and he was quite impressed with the architecture and acoustics.

He inquired of the tour guide, “Is this magnificent auditorium named after Chaim Moscovitz, the famous Talmudic scholar?”

“No,” replied the guide. “It is named after Sam Moscovitz, the writer.”

“Never heard of him. What did he write?”

“A big check,” replied the guide.

Harry E.

Marriage Proposal

A poor man managed to get an appointment with a wealthy Jewish philanthropist by insisting that he had a foolproof way for the man to make 5 million dollars.

“So let me hear your great idea,” said the philanthropist.

“It’s very simple,” replied the pauper. “I understand that when your daughter gets married, you’re planning on giving her a dowry of 10 million dollars.”

“Nu?” said the philanthropist.

“So, I’ve come to tell you that I’m willing marry her for half the amount!”

Alisson F.

Aging Requests

Old Mordy Applebaum goes to his doctor complaining of aches and pains all over his body. After a thorough examination, the doctor gives him a clean bill of health.

“Mordy, you’re in excellent shape for an 80-year-old man. But I’m not a magician – I can’t make you any younger,” says the doctor.

“Who asked you to make me younger”” says Mordy. “You just make sure I get older!”

Joseph K.

Business Talk

Sammy and Isaac haven’t seen each other in a while. One day they happen to meet on the street. They exchange pleasantries when Isaac says to Sammy, “How come you didn’t ask me how business is?”

“I’m sorry,” replies Sammy. “So, how’s business?”

“Oy – don’t ask.”

Eddie M.

First Flight

Aboard an El Al flight from America to Israel, Esther was taking her very first flight to visit her children and grandchildren who has just made aliyah (moved to the Holy Land). They had only been aloft a few minutes when the old lady complained to the stewardess that her ears were popping.

The girl smiled and gave the older woman some chewing gum, assuring her that many people experience the same discomfort.

When they landed in Tel Aviv, Esther thanked the stewardess. “Thank you very much for the chewing gum sweetie,” she said. “But tell me, how do I get it out of my ears?”

Danny N.

Riddles – March 2026

RIDDLE:  Mis-Coinception

Submitted by:  Leon B.

Two U.S. coins add up to 30 cents. If one of them is not a nickel, what are the two coins?

Last Month’s Riddle: Peachy Keen

If there are seven boys, and seven peaches in a basket, how do you give each boy a peach, but keep a peach in the basket?

Solution: Give the last boy his peach in the basket!

Solved by: Solly Gindi, Maggie Matalon, H. Soleimani, Big Mike, Richie Ayal, Daniel Mann, Jacob Ayal, Mayer Cohen, and Ralph S.

JUNIOR RIDDLE:  Time Twist

Submitted by:  Vivian S.

What day follows the day before yesterday if two days from now will be Sunday?

Last Month’s Junior Riddle: Mental Math

In your head, take 1,000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1,000. Now add 30. Add another 1,000. Now add 20. Now add another 1,000. Now add 10. What is the total?

Solution: The total is 4,100. Many people get tripped up at the end of the equation, when adding 10 to 4,090, and come up with 5,000.

Solved by: Maggie Matalon, Richie Ayal, Daniel Mann, The Shmulster, Jacob Ayal, Mayer Cohen, Sara Matut, The Big Cheese, and Haim S.

Medical Halacha – NY Nurses’ Strike in Halacha

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas

Nearly 15,000 nurses across New York City launched a strike on January 12, 2026, making it one of the largest nursing strikes in the city’s history. The strike lasted over three weeks. What does the halacha say about healthcare workers who withhold their labor – not for higher pay alone, but for the ability to provide safe care?

Medicine Demands Fair Compensation

The Gemara establishes that asia d’magan b’magan magan shaveh – “a physician who works for free is worth nothing.” The Rosh explains: “When the doctor does not receive payment, his heart and mind are not meticulous regarding the core needs of the patient.” Hacham Eliyahu Bakshi Doron (Responsa Binyan Av 3:69)  therefore rules: “The public are obliged to pay appropriate salaries to physicians and allow them to focus on their holy work.” Medicine performed under duress is inherently compromised medicine.

The New York nurses’ argument introduces precisely this nuance: the status quo itself was dangerous. If nurses working under a broken system cannot provide necessary care, then the strike changes from abandonment to preservation – fighting for conditions necessary to fulfill the mitzvah of healing.

The Children of Israel Are Servants to Me

Hacham Eliyahu Bakshi Doron discusses medical strikes at length. He explains this halacha stems from the principle that every employee has the right to stand up for their freedom, and the employer has no power to prevent them from doing so. The Shulhan Aruch writes that “a worker may retract even in the middle of the day” (Choshen Mishpat 333:1). Even if already paid, they may cease work, with the money becoming a debt. The reason: “For the Children of Israel are servants to Me” (Vayikra 25:55) and not servants to servants. This prevents employment from becoming a form of inescapable servitude. Work performed under coercion is slavery, forbidden regardless of economic agreements. Hacham Ovadia Yosef, zt”l, (Yechaveh Da’at 4:48) acknowledges that “the minhag hamdina, the custom of the land, is to strike.” But it does not apply in all situations.

The Red Line: Pikuach Nefesh

Hacham Ovadia Yosef, while permitting teachers to strike under certain conditions, draws a sharp line regarding healthcare. In Yechaveh Da’at IV:48, he writes explicitly that the permission to strike applies “except for matters involving life-saving measures, such as hospital services.” Pikuach nefesh (saving a life) overrides nearly every other commandment. Hacham Bakshi-Doron reinforces this in Binyan Av, arguing that a doctor or nurse is bound by the negative commandment, “Do not stand idly by the blood of your neighbor.” From this perspective, abandoning a patient in immediate danger is akin to bloodshed. No financial grievance or administrative dispute can justify leaving an ICU bed unmonitored.

Medicine as Mitzvah, Not Merely Profession

Hacham Bakshi Doron writes that the medical worker is not a servant of the hospital, but is a servant of Hashem – tasked with the mitzvah of healing. “Medicine is not a profession but a mitzvah, the most sublime mitzvah of saving lives. If they are forbidden to strike, they are indeed slaves – but slaves to the Holy One, Blessed be He.” A caregiver devoted to saving life is no servant to man – “there is no freer person than one who serves Hashem.”

Some argue medical strikes ultimately improve healthcare by forcing better conditions. This must be absolutely rejected. The principle is ironclad: ein dochin nefesh mipnei nefesh – we do not push aside one life for another. There is no halachic justification for withholding lifesaving care from patients before us, even to save more patients in the future. Each nefesh has infinite value; mathematical comparisons are meaningless.

Conclusion

Nurses and physicians are entitled – indeed obligated – to demand conditions that allow them to practice medicine responsibly and with yishuv hada’at. A system that exhausts its caregivers violates human dignity and ultimately endangers life. Yet the red line remains immovable: wherever pikuach nefesh is present, the duty to heal overrides every tactical consideration. The halachic mandate is disciplined protest – one that preserves emergency care, protects the vulnerable, and refuses to turn human lives into bargaining chips. In this balance, halacha affirms both truths at once: the caregiver is not a slave to institutions, and the patient is never abandoned. Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer, and author on Medical Halacha. He heads the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. He is the author of “Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome” and “Nutrition and Hydration in Halacha.” To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com.

Mabrouk – March 2026

Births – Baby Boy

Mr. & Mrs. Ezra Harary

Sammy & Judy Braha

Buddy & Lillian Shalam

Morris & Diane Mishan

Jojo & Anna Sutton

Nathan & Jessica Matut

Ted & Michelle Betesh

Ralph & Stacie Dweck

Ricky & Frieda Tawil

Isaac & Adelle Soffer

Births – Baby Girl

Mark & Nechama Daner

Michael & Devorah Farhi

Joey & Linda Saban

Abe & Renee Grazi

Max & Adele Salem

Michael & Grace Mamiye

Isaac & Susan Dayan

Rabbi Eli & Diana Cohen

Aaron & Luiza Harari

Shaya & Audrey Chabot

Engagements

Steven Shamula to Julie Esses

Jack Saad to Jeanette Cohen

Danny Sitt to Florence Zeitouni

Shlomo Bijou to Shirley Cohen

Elliot Soffer to Yvonne Tobias

Ben Dahan to Sarah Sorcher

Isaac Levy to Charlotte Arnstein

Weddings

David Dabbah to Rachel Rishty Morris Nadjar to Lauren Heskiel

Ask Jido – March 2026

Dear Jido,

My family moved from Brooklyn to Deal in the middle of the school year, and I’m really struggling to adjust, especially with changing schools when everyone already seems settled. I miss my old friends and teachers, and my new school feels very different socially and academically, which makes me feel out of place and nervous to be myself. I try to stay positive, but some days I feel lonely and frustrated, and I don’t know how long it’s supposed to take to feel comfortable again. How can I adjust to this mid-year change, make new friends without forcing it, and still hold on to who I am while everything around me feels new?”

Signed,

New Kid in Deal

Dear New Kid,

Yes, it’s not easy being on the outside looking in.  It’s also not so uncommon. Kids who have been together for many years tend to be clique-ish. So, here’s a few things you can do to break into the club.

Number One – join an after school club.  Whether it’s art or math or basketball, you will be with like-minded kids who enjoy the same thing that you do. After a short while, just by being yourself, you will become a member of the team. If you’re really head and shoulders above them, they might even make you captain.

Number Two – don’t be afraid to excel.  If there’s one particular subject that you’re very good at, don’t be shy. Raise your hand, answer questions, volunteer information. Let the others get to know you while you are getting to feel more comfortable with the teacher and the environment. 

Number Three – you might even want to speak to that teacher and ask if there’s anyone in the class that you might be able to help with the homework or assignments.  Not that you should associate only with the  weaker students, but at the very least, you will feel good about yourself for helping somebody else.

Number Four – let’s say the teacher gave a great class, or there was a party or celebration. During lunch, just go over to another student and say, “Wow, wasn’t that special?  Is she always that much fun?” Or if the test was hard – “Wow, what answer did you put for the third question? I couldn’t think of ANYTHING!”  Be sure to be smiling and upbeat, the way you were in Brooklyn.

The worst thing you could do would be to crawl into your shell and spend ten months a year by yourself. Let the others get to know you. Smile. Ask questions. Be helpful. Jido

Waiting for the Throne to Fall

As Iran trembles, Reza Pahlavi Steps Forward as the Self-Declared Bridge

between Revolution and Democracy

Dave Gordon

Once a distant figure in exile, Crown Prince Reza Pahlavi has emerged as a rallying symbol for many Iranians demanding change. His name echoes through the streets during protests, reflecting a growing following inside and outside of Iran.

The son of the late shah fled to the United States after the 1979 Iranian Revolution and has leveraged his royal pedigree and a flurry of media appearances over the past year to raise his political profile.

Pahlavi’s Intended Role

“I think I’ve earned their [my followers’] trust and respect,” he said. “And, that puts me in a position to be impactful in that [leadership] role… I’m not shying away from that responsibility.”

Pahlavi aims to become a transitional leader should the current regime in Iran collapse.

“My role is to see to it that this process culminates in a temporary governance, while the Constitutional Assembly deliberates what exactly will be the rule of law of the land,” he said,  touting both secular and democratic values.  

U.S. Reactions

Washington remains cautious: As of Jan. 8, President Trump appeared reluctant to meet with Pahlavi. In mid-January, White House envoy Steve Witkoff met with Pahlavi – until now, the only high-level American government official to do so, the news website Axios reported. According to polls cited in the article, one-third of Iranians support Pahlavi, while another third do not. 

“Crown Prince Reza Pahlavi has re-entered Iran’s political imagination,” wrote Ali Siadatan, an Iranian Canadian educator, in the National Post. “Today, his support extends beyond traditional royalist circles, reflecting not nostalgia for the past but a search for continuity amid collapse.”

From the outside, the Iranian government’s hold on power appears at its weakest point since the shah was overthrown in the 1979 revolution. With street protests and violent government crackdowns the U.S. is keeping a sharp eye on events. On Jan. 26, the USS Abraham Lincoln carrier strike group arrived in the Indian Ocean, putting it closer to assist in any possible U.S. operations targeting Iran. The USS Gerald Ford is on its way to join the USS Abraham Lincoln.

Iranian Expats Weighs In

Should there be a power vacuum, Pahlavi is “the only alternative,” said Salman Sima, a former Iranian political prisoner who fled Iran to Canada and has organized numerous protests supporting Israel against Hamas. “It is really obvious these days, [that Pahlavi is] the only name you can hear from inside Iran.”

Sima believes the crown prince is a unifying figure who has found support among progressives and conservatives. “He doesn’t take a side, he doesn’t say ‘I’m going to be the shah,’ or ‘I’m going to be the president,’ or ‘I’m going to be the prime minister.’ All he said was a free election must be determined by the people of Iran.”

Iranian expat Dr. Amir Hamidi is the Chairman of the Board of Telo-Revers Anti-Aging Medical Laboratory. He is an internationally recognized expert in global terrorism, cybersecurity, and law enforcement. Regarding Pahlavi he said, “This isn’t a personality contest. In a national liberation moment, the real question is who can unify people, lower the temperature between factions, and keep the transition focused on democracy and the rule of law. He has been consistent on the essentials: a secular state, equal citizenship, rejection of revenge politics, and a future decided only by the Iranian people through free elections.”

The former Justice Department special agent, who also served as country attaché in the United Arab Emirates, added that Pahlavi has recognition across generations and across the political spectrum inside and outside Iran.

Hamidi claims that Pahlavi supports “any figure who places Iran’s sovereignty in the hands of its people, not in the hands of armed factions, foreign powers, or one-party ideologues – and Crown Prince Reza Pahlavi has repeatedly said exactly that.”

Road Map

In July 2025, Pahlavi led a public whitepaper officially called the Emergency Phase Booklet. A whitepaper is an in-depth report to help readers understand a complex topic and present a problem-solving solution. The whitepaper included consultations from a wide array of experts. For starters, Pahlavi calls for Iranians “to be fully involved in the progress of our nation, as opposed to a very corrupt mafia that has been ruling our country all these years.

“I always believe that it’s important for people to have a road map to recovery, to understand what will happen post‑regime. What’s the alternative? How are we to re‑establish a process that will stabilize the country, bring about the opportunity for economic growth and investment?”  

Under Pahlavi’s leadership, Hamidi said, “people will have a true opportunity for prosperity, and for that, we have a very comprehensive project of what is to be done short term, mid‑term and long term.” Hamidi sees great potential when the regime falls: “Imagine just the amount of talent that exists within the Iranian diaspora,” he said. “Iran is not just simply an oil‑rich or gas‑rich country – imagine tourism just as an industry, and everything that can open up.


“I’ve talked to industrialists, economists, entrepreneurs, Iranians, and non‑Iranians that are waiting for this opportunity, once Iran is open again as a last untapped frontier,” Hamidi stated. The concern, of course, is that the country have healthy circumstances in order to be reintegrated in the free world, so investors feel comfortable and secure about their assets.

Pro-Israel, Pro-Holocaust Recognition

Reza Pahlavi, like his father, is aligns with Israel and the Jewish people, framing that stance as both historical and moral. He argues that Iranians reject the Islamic Republic’s genocidal anti-Israel and anti-Semitic policies and says a future democratic Iran should restore friendly ties with Israel and its neighbors, which he has labeled potential “Cyrus Accords.” He frequently invokes the legacy of Cyrus the Great – who allowed Jews to return to Judea after the Babylonian Exile. He cites the biblical connection between Persians and Jews, describing their relations as a “Biblical relationship” stretching back 2,500 years.                                                                                                                                                       He acknowledges shared values of human rights and religious tolerance. Pahlavi has insisted that, because Tehran denies the Holocaust, he has a particular duty as an Iranian leader-in-exile to honor its victims and reject denialism. He portrays the Islamic Republic as a driver of global anti-Semitism and terrorism, and cast himself and his movement as allies of Jews. 

In April 2023, Pahlavi traveled to Israel to carry a message of peace and friendship from the Iranian people, renew ancient bonds, and explore economic and technological cooperation, especially Israeli water technology that he argued could help remedy Iran’s severe water crisis. He attended the Yom HaShoah ceremony at Yad Vashem, declaring it his duty to honor Holocaust victims on behalf of Iranians, and stating that the current regime “doesn’t represent the Iranian people.”

During the trip he prayed at the Western Wall and met senior officials. For many Iranian Jews in Israel, his presence and rhetoric were a symbolic reconnection to an era when Jews felt protected under the Pahlavi monarchy, and as an affirmation that they remained participants of the Iranian story. 

Iran and Nukes

After a recent White House meeting with Netanyahu in February, President Trump insisted that Iran nuclear talks must continue. Trump has not restored the JCPOA, the Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action or the “Iran nuclear deal.” Instead, he has initiated a new round of negotiations under a maximum‑pressure framework.

The Crown Prince responded that nuclear weapons are “not a real estate deal that he [Trump] can cut with a regime that is very corrupt.” Pahlavi bristled at the notion of military intervention, “We don’t need to have an army coming into Iran. We have the boots on the ground already – the Iranian people who are there.” 

The actual war to fight, he insisted, is the ideological war, that has been the root of much of the unrest in the region for fifty years.

The Eye of the Octopus

“Radicals have always tried to recruit people out of desperation and ignorance, to brainwash them into one way of thinking,” Pahlavi said. “One of the key sources of this radicalization is the regime in Tehran. That’s where the eye of the octopus is. [The West has] been fighting the tentacles, but as long as the eye of the octopus is sitting there, you’re not going to eliminate the problem.” It starts with who bankrolls the terror sources:  “Follow the money trail,” he said, “Follow the funding. Once they’re gone, all of that disappears. The funding disappears. The root of the ideology disappears.”  That, he suggests, is how you get past the octopus, and back to the country beneath it: an Iran known less for sponsoring militias abroad than for the diversity and openness of its own society. “The beauty of Iran is the diversity of its culture,” Pahlavi said. “That’s the whole beauty of Iran, a nation state that for centuries had this mosaic of ethnic groups and different faiths living side by side.”  

Keep Moving: The Secret to a Healthier, Happier Life

Ellen Geller Kamaras

“Keep Moving” has become my guidepost for a healthy life, both physically and mentally.  Exercise helps every part of your body including your mind.  Exercise can help you feel good by improving your mood. 

Good for Body and Soul

When I get stuck or start dwelling on things that are out of my control, I go outside for a walk, rain or shine.  I start my mornings with a stroll on the Brooklyn Heights Promenade and gaze at the lovely Manhattan skyline.  I take three deep breaths, and thank Hashem for creating such beauty and for giving me health and a wonderful family.  Some experts refer to this as an “awe walk.” An awe walk is a brief, intentional walk where the walker focuses outwardly on experiencing sensations of wonder, curiosity, and vastness in their surroundings. Consciously looking for beauty, nature, or novelty helps shift attention away from internal worries, reducing stress and boosting mental well-being.

The American Psychological Association has projected that one out of every four 65-year-olds today will live past age 90.  One way to make that happen, with Hashem’s help, is to maintain a healthy lifestyle, including exercise.  Exercise can help prevent falls and injuries, keep your brain sharp and boost your energy levels.

For adults, the American College of Sports Medicine recommends at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity activity at least five days per week. Adding in some resistance training to your exercise routine two to three days per week will provide extra benefits.  Engaging in 30 minutes of any type of physical activity five days a week may reduce your risk of dying from any cause by 28 percent and from heart disease by 20 percent.

Youngsters Benefit

The importance of daily exercise for promoting healthy physical and mental development applies to young people, too.60 minutes of moderate to vigorous physical activity every day is recommended for children and teens.   Like adults, they should incorporate bone and muscle-strengthening exercises at least three times a week.

Incorporating biking, running, or swimming into your child’s routine enables them to deal with both physical and emotional challenges more successfully.  Daily exercise strengthens their bones and muscles, improves their cardiovascular health, helps them sustain a healthy weight, and enhances immune function.   Physical exercise improves children’s cognitive function, too, by enhancing brain health, memory, and attention, resulting in better academic performance.   Exercise also reduces the risk of type 2 diabetes and heart disease.   Daily exercise elevates young people’s mood, reduces anxiety and depression, and aids in stress management.

When children form the habit of daily exercise at a young age, it sets the foundation for an active lifestyle as they reach adulthood and, in the future, it will help them to age well.

Indoor Exercise

Did the frigid winter get you down and discourage you from exercising?   Spending moderate amounts of time indoors and enjoying downtime has its perks and can help you reset and relax.  However, spending too much time at home has its drawbacks.  Its pitfalls include, but are not limited to, low levels of Vitamin D, sluggishness, weight gain, stress, anxiety, and depression.

To stay healthy, it’s even more important to exercise when you are stuck indoors for its physical rewards and mental health perks.  People who sheltered in place during the pandemic were encouraged to do regular physical activity at home to avoid becoming sedentary.

I was surprised to see how many steps I could score on my Fitbit watch without leaving home.  Plus, I have several dance and exercise apps on my phone to keep me moving.  My husband calls this “puttering,” but I call it straightening up and organizing the house.    Studies show that household chores count as exercise.  The positive effects were found to be the same whether one was walking or exercising at the gym, walking, or doing chores such gardening or vacuuming.  Mel Robbins is a  bestselling author, award-winning podcast host, and an expert on personal growth. She recommends dancing while doing dishes or cooking.

A 2026 study conducted by the AdventHealth Research Institute and the University of Pittsburgh confirms that consistent moderate-to-vigorous aerobic exercise can significantly slow the structural aging of the brain, making it appear nearly a year younger. The study suggests that 150 minutes of weekly aerobic exercise, (such as brisk walking, cycling, or swimming) can reduce a marker known as “brain-predicted age difference” (brain-PAD) in adults 26 to 58.

To Age Well

Take care to do these actions.  Sit on the floor, and get back up on your own. Do yoga, Zumba, or other regular physical activity, jump, and walk briskly. When asked a question, speaking to the point of the topic and do not ramble. 

If you can get outdoors to exercise, your body will net additional rewards.  The natural sunlight helps your body produce more Vitamin D, which is essential to a healthy immune system. If you are sun sensitive, or have had Basal cell carcinoma, make sure to apply sunscreen.  

Dopamine is the “feel good” neurotransmitter that acts as a chemical messenger in your brain to signal reward, motivation, and pleasure. It plays a critical role in movement, memory, and focus It is the brain chemical that is transmitted when we experience pleasure. 

Outdoor exercise can increase dopamine as well as serotonin (a chemical messenger that stabilizes mood, sleep, and digestion. It is often called the “feel good” hormone because it promotes feelings of well-being and safety) and other natural endorphin levels that support a positive mood.

What are we waiting for?  Let’s get moving!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Ellen Geller Kamaras, CPA/MBA, is an International Coach Federation (ICF) Associate Certified Coach.  Her coaching specialties include life, career. and dating coaching.  Ellen can be contacted at ellen.kamaras@gmail.com (www.lifecoachellen.com).

The Power of One Step

HABAYIT: Providing Hesed Apartments and Comfort for Families Coming to New York for Critical Medical Treatment

Sometimes, everything changes with one step – not a grand gesture or a carefully planned move, but one small decision made in a moment of need.

No one plans for the moment when life takes an unexpected turn.

A diagnosis, a treatment plan, or an urgent medical need can send someone – or someone they love – across cities and countries to New York for critical treatment or surgery. Routine gives way to uncertainty, and families find themselves navigating unfamiliar ground.

And then, as the reality begins to settle in, a pressing question appears: Where will we stay?

Habayit was born out of that question. Not from a master plan, funding, or an organization already in place – but from one small, brave decision.

The First Step

A small group of real estate agents found themselves receiving the same call again and again. Families arrived in New York during some of the most vulnerable moments of their lives, exhausted and overwhelmed, far from home and desperate to find a place to stay. Short-term housing was nearly impossible to secure, and hotels were both unaffordable and impractical.

So they took one step.

They opened one hesed apartment for people who needed to come to New York for medical treatment – a furnished, dignified place where individuals and families could stay while focusing on healing.

There were no big expectations. The group of real estate agents believed they might be able to sustain one apartment – one family at a time. But the moment the need was shared, something extraordinary happened.

Other Steps

The community showed up.

Beds arrived. Sheets were dropped off. Pots and pans, furniture, toys, mezuzot, and sefarim followed. Volunteers stepped forward quietly and generously, transforming an empty space into a true home.

And then, one step led to another.

Our sages teach, “Open for Me an opening the size of a needle’s eye, and I will open for you an opening like the entrance of a great hall.”

When a person takes even the smallest step toward kindness, Heaven expands that step far beyond what we could accomplish alone. Habayit began with one small opening – and Hashem opened the doors.

Four Years In

Today, just four years later, Habayit has grown from that single apartment into 17 fully furnished hesed apartments, powered by hundreds of devoted volunteers and helping hundreds of families from around the world.

Families have come to New York from Israel, Panama, Mexico, London, Canada, Argentina, Venezuela, Brazil, and from many states across the United States – all in search of life-saving medical treatments. They arrived frightened and uncertain and found themselves held, supported, and cared for at the very moment they needed it most.

Sometimes, the impact of that care reaches even further. Over the years, Habayit has had the profound merit of welcoming four “Habayit babies” – children born to couples who came to New York for fertility treatments and were able to stay because they had a place to call home.

A Legacy of Kindness

At its core, Habayit is about dignity, sensitivity, and quiet hesed. The organization was founded in memory of the Baal Shem of Michelstadt, whose life was defined by compassion, generosity, and kindness towards all. That legacy lives on through every apartment prepared, every family welcomed, and every step taken on behalf of someone in need.

But Habayit’s story is not only about growth. It is about moments – moments when one seemingly small action quietly changed the course of a life.

Last year, Community Magazine published an article about Habayit. In one paragraph, it mentioned a painful reality – families who needed to come to New York for life-saving medical treatment, but there were not enough apartments to accommodate them.

Another Quiet Response

Among the readers was a man who took that paragraph to heart.

After reading the article, he reached out to Habayit. He explained that he had a fully set-up apartment. He didn’t need it at the time. If Habayit was ever full, he wanted them to have his number – just in case someone else might need a place to stay.

Nothing dramatic happened that day. There was no fanfare – just a reader who saw a need and chose to take one step.

A couple of months later, Habayit received another call – this time from a man who had come to New York from Israel for stage-four cancer treatment. Nearly seventy years old and alone, he had spent hours calling Jewish organizations, unable to find a place to stay. By Friday morning, he believed he would be sleeping on the street.

When he reached Habayit, there were no apartments available. All were full. But, because one man had read that article months earlier and acted, there was another option. He was given that phone number.

What happened next is best told in his own words.

A Letter Written to Habayit

The following letter was written by Yosef (name changed for privacy):

My name is Yosef. I came to New York from Israel to be treated for stage-four cancer.

I am almost seventy years old and could not afford to stay in a hotel while receiving treatment. One Friday morning, I spent three hours calling Jewish organizations, asking for help finding a place to stay. I was unsuccessful and did not know where to turn. Sleeping on the street felt like my only option.

I have no relatives in New York. Each call led me somewhere else, and it became clear I had nowhere to go.

When I spoke with someone from Habayit, I was given the phone number of a family who might be able to help. By then, I had very little hope left. Still, I called.

A man answered. After hearing my situation, he immediately told me that he and his wife were inviting me into their home.

I took the subway and arrived at their house. I was shown a private room and told I could stay as long as I needed. That was the first time I cried since being diagnosed with terminal cancer.

I am not a religious person, and I do not remember crying since childhood. Being welcomed by a Jewish family who had never met me before was overwhelming.

That Friday night, I sat at their Shabbat table. Only hours earlier, I believed I would be sleeping on the street. The warmth, kindness, and generosity I experienced is something I will never forget.

Thank you and Shabbat Shalom,

Yosef

A Series of Small Steps

That life was changed through a series of small steps.

Community Magazine shared the story. One reader carried it in his heart and responded. And through those quiet choices, a man who feared sleeping on the street found warmth, dignity, and a place at a Shabbat table.

But his story is only one glimpse into the quiet ways small acts of hesed reshape lives. There was another moment – different in setting, but identical in spirit.

At a summer Habayit event, Rabbi Shlomo Farhi spoke about the quiet work being done behind the scenes – the phone calls, the apartments, the families arriving in need. By the time he finished speaking, there were tears throughout the room.

Before leaving, he added one more sentence. He explained that there was an urgent need for an apartment near Sloan Kettering. Families were coming for treatment, and there was simply nowhere for them to stay.

A few days later, the phone rang.

Someone who had heard about the urgent need reached out. The message had stayed with her. She explained that she had a furnished apartment right near Sloan Kettering and that Habayit was welcome to use it.

Within days, a family moved in. In the middle of fear and uncertainty, they had a place to stay. Since then, it has served as a safe haven for dozens of families whose loved ones were undergoing life-saving treatments.

Rabbi Farhi’s words did not end when the event was over. They traveled beyond the room, reaching a woman who chose to act. One small step – offering an apartment – became comfort, stability, and dignity for families in their most vulnerable moments.

A High Schooler Steps Up

Another time, the step seemed even smaller.

A high-school intern came to help at Habayit for the day. There were no urgent calls or emergencies. Instead of leaving early, he chose to organize the warehouse, which had become so crowded that it was difficult to move through. By the time he finished, everything was accessible and in its place.

That night, the phone rang.

A 36-year-old man from Panama had received devastating news from his doctors: if he did not get to New York immediately, he would not survive. He was flown in on an emergency medical evacuation flight and rushed straight to the hospital upon arrival. His family needed a place to stay – immediately.

Habayit had no available apartments. Brooklyn was full. Manhattan was full. Every other organization was full. There was only one option: an apartment that had not yet been set up.

Because the warehouse had been organized earlier that day, the team could immediately reach what they needed. Volunteers came running. Furniture was moved. Food was brought. Essentials were gathered.

By early evening, the apartment was no longer empty. The fridge was stocked. The beds were made. The space felt like a home.

While the man was in the hospital, his family arrived exhausted and terrified – and they had somewhere safe to walk into.

That life was saved because one small step had been taken earlier.

The Quiet Miracle

This is the quiet miracle of Habayit.

An organization built not on buildings, but on people. Volunteers who answer calls at all hours. Donors who give quietly. Families who open their doors. Teenagers who stay late to help.

The need continues to grow. Families are still calling. More lives can be helped.

If you would like to be part of this work – whether through donating, volunteering, or getting involved – Habayit would love to hear from you. And if you or someone you know has an empty or underused apartment in Brooklyn or Manhattan that could be used for hesed, that one step could change a life.

For all inquiries, please contact the Habayit office: 580-HABAYIT (580-422-2948). Because the story of Habayit doesn’t end here. It continues every time someone chooses to take one step.