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The Enduring Legacy of Sephardic Bikur Holim: A Journey Through History

In the heart of Seattle, Washington, a vibrant legacy endures with the Sephardic Bikur Holim Congregation. Established in 1914 by Levantine Jews from western Turkey, it continues to this day.

The incredible story of Sephardic Bikur Holim began in Medieval Spain. Then, during the Golden Age of Spanish Jewry, it all came to a tragic close with the Edict of Expulsion in 1492, issued by Ferdinand and Isabella. The Jews were forced to flee their homeland, and the refugees found a welcoming sanctuary in the Ottoman Empire. The Sultan, sensing an opportunity, was eager to take advantage of the Spaniard’s misjudgment. He opened his ports and cities to the refugees. They settled into their new homes and flourished there while keeping to their customs. As they settled across the Ottoman Empire, they not only survived, but thrived, while preserving a legacy that spans centuries, and through it all, they remained steadfast to their heritage.

After World War I, these Jews came to Seattle looking for a better life as well as to escape the crumbling Ottoman Empire. Our ancestors brought with them a treasure trove of culture, including their own unique language (Ladino), cherished customs, distinct minhagim, Turkish foods, and beautiful music (Romanzas), along with a deep well of religious knowledge.

Today, the Sephardic Bikur Holim community continues to honor its distinct practices rooted in ancient traditions. This connection to a shared past is not a relic but a living, vibrant force, expressed through unique liturgical practices (hazzanut), a love of family, and a profound respect for the Torah.

Our congregation is seeking a new spiritual leader to guide its next chapter. Over the past 100 years there have only been four Rabbinic leaders.

If you, or someone you know, are interested in making a big impact on a close-knit Sephardic community, this is an opportunity to make a real difference in a beautiful city.

To find out more about the community and our congregation, we invite you to visit our website at www.SBHSEATTLE.ORG. Here you can find out more details about the position, as well as the warm and friendly Seattle Sephardic community!

Medical Halacha – IV Hydration on Yom Kippur

Charlie suffers from serious heart problems. His doctor warned him that fasting on Yom Kippur could endanger his life and instructed him to drink fluids. Troubled by the idea of drinking on this sacred day, Charlie asked me if he could use intravenous (IV) hydration instead.

His son Jack, who is generally healthy, had a bout of food poisoning and became severely dehydrated. He asked if he needs to remove his IV before the fast begins in order to observe Yom Kippur properly.

Is IV Hydration Considered Eating or Drinking?

Halachically, IV hydration is not considered eating or drinking. The Torah prohibition on Yom Kippur refers specifically to consuming food or drink through the mouth. Hydration administered intravenously bypasses this and is therefore not technically a violation of the fast.

Hacham Ovadia Yosef

Despite the technical leniency, Hacham Ovadia, zt”l,  (Chazon Ovadia Yom Kippur, p. 298) opposed the use of IV hydration on Yom Kippur when not medically necessary. He explains that while IV fluids are not halachically defined as food or drink, they should not be used unless clearly required for health reasons.

He gives three key reasons: Firstly, drinking shiurim (small amounts) provides physical and psychological comfort (ituvei da’at) to a sick person. IV hydration does not offer the same level of satisfaction. The Chachamim were deeply concerned with ensuring the comfort of the ill.

Secondly,halacha already allows eating or drinking when health is in danger. There is no halachic requirement to find artificial alternatives. Insisting on IVs could mislead people into thinking they must use IV hydration rather than eat or drink – potentially putting lives in danger if IVs aren’t available.

Lastly,inserting an IV causes minor bleeding, which constitutes an unnecessary wound – another prohibition on Yom Kippur. Since eating or drinking is already permitted in such cases, this injury is avoidable and therefore unjustified.

Hacham Ben Zion Abba Shaul

In contrast, Hacham Ben Zion Abba Shaul, zt”l,(Or LeTzion 4:15:5) held that IV hydration is halachically preferable. He argued that even drinking in shiurim is still be a biblical prohibition, especially according to the Rambam (Shevitat Assor 2:3). IV hydration, by contrast, is not a normal form of drinking and is therefore permitted. As for the bleeding involved in inserting the IV, he viewed it as an unintended and destructive act (pesik reisha d’lo nicha lei), which does not carry a Torah prohibition and is therefore preferable to drinking in shiurim.

Drinking in Shiurim

When someone must drink on Yom Kippur due to pikuach nefesh, when medically possible they should drink in shiurim (melo lugmav, about 1.3 oz or 40 ml). The required pause between sips varies by opinion, from five seconds to nine minutes. Hacham Ovadia (Yabia Omer, OC 2:31) ruled that a pause of five seconds suffices, especially if longer breaks compromise the person’s health.

When Fasting Becomes Forbidden

If fasting could endanger Charlie’s life, not only is he permitted to drink – it is a halachic obligation. In Yechaveh Daat (1:61), Hacham Ovadia writes unequivocally: “If there is concern of possible danger to his life by fasting, one must listen to the doctor and eat on Yom Kippur, because pikuach nefesh overrides the mitzvah of fasting. If the sick person is stringent and fasts nonetheless, he is not acting righteously – on the contrary, he will be punished for this.”

What Should Charlie and Jack Do?

Charlie must not fast if doing so endangers his life. Ideally, he should drink in measured amounts (shiurim). If that is not possible or safe, IV hydration is permitted. Similarly, if Charlie refuses to drink IV hydration is permitted due to pikuach nefesh. Jack, who is already connected to an IV due to dehydration, does not need to remove it before Yom Kippur. In his case, continuing hydration through the IV is fully permitted.

Some people feel guilt or shame about eating or drinking on Yom Kippur, even when halachically necessary. But we must remember: the same Hashem who commands the healthy to fast commands the very sick to eat. When halacha requires eating or drinking on Yom Kippur, doing so is not only allowed – it is amitzvah. No atonement is needed. In fact, following halacha in these cases is the highest mitzvah.

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer and author on Medical Halacha. He heads the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. His latest book is “Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome.” To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com.

The Lighter Side – September 2025

Spiritual Check Up

Marvin is at his doctor for a physical. Dr. Epstein runs some tests and says to Marvin, “Well, Marvin, for an 82-year-old man you are in top condition physically. But how about mentally and spiritually?”

“What do you mean, doc?” asks Marvin.

“Well how is your connection with Gd, for example?”

Marvin says, ”Oh me and Gd? We’re tight. We have a real bond, He’s good to me. Every night when I have to get up to go to the bathroom, he turns on the light for me, and then, when I leave, he turns it back off.”

Well, upon hearing this, Dr. Epstein was concerned.

He called Marvin’s wife and said, “’I’d like to speak to you about your husband. He claims that every night when he needs to use the restroom, Gd turns on the light for him and turns it off for him again when he leaves.”

She replies, “Oy vey. He’s been using the refrigerator again!”

Jake  D.

Hashem Knows

One day Lisa was explaining to her young son Mikey that you should never tell a lie. She told him that Hashem saw everything and heard everything.

She explained, “Even though your father and I may not know if you are telling a lie, Hashem will know.”

Little Mikey replied, “But will He tell?”

Miriam T.

Old Mrs. Scheiner

Old Mrs. Scheiner was a tough lady who liked to walk wherever she could. But one day descending the stairs of her third-floor apartment, she broke her leg. As the doctor put on her cast, he warned her not to climb any stairs. Several months later, the doctor took off the cast.

“Can I climb stairs now?” asked old Mrs. Scheiner. “Yes,” he replied.

“Thank goodness!” she said. “I’m tired of shimmying up and down that drainpipe every day!”

Nancy S.

Shoe Sale

Friday was Shira’s day for carpool, so she picked up her daughter and some other classmates to take them home. As it happened, Shira’s daughter needed new shoes and she saw that her friend Rivky had some nice ones.

“Rivky,” Shira commented, “I see you got new shoes! Where did you get them?”

“At the store,” Rivky answered.

“Which one?” Shira asked.

Rivky began looking at her new shoes and after a pause said, “Both of them!”

Alan K.

Two Left Feet

Zadie was coming over to take his grandson David to the park.

“Okay David, we’re going to the park!” said Zadie. “Go get your shoes on!”

Being only four years old, David said, “Okay, but will you tie them for me?”

“Sure,” Zadie replied with a big smile.

David bolted into the next room to put on his shoes, returning with a big smile and the shoes on the wrong feet.

Looking at his shoes, Zadie smiled and said, “David, your shoes are on the wrong feet.”

David looked down, then looked back at Zadie with a very sad face and replied, “These are the only feet I have.”

Sarah C.

In the Bag

Last year, Chaim Yankel had a large company fly him out for a meeting. It was his first time in business class.

During the return flight the stewardess gave Chaim Yankel some gourmet brownies and cookies. Not hungry, he decided to save them for later, so he placed them in an air sickness bag.

After the plane landed Chaim Yankel got up to leave and a stewardess approached him. She asked, “Sir, would you like for me to dispose of that for you?”

Chaim Yankel replied, “No thanks, I’m saving it for my kids.”

Danny S.

Riding It Out

Morty decided enough was enough – he was going to join a gym and start getting in shape. He joined an aerobics class and the instructor had everyone lie on their backs with their legs up as if pedaling a bike. After several minutes, Morty suddenly stopped.

“Why did you stop pedaling?” the instructor shouted to Morty.

“I didn’t stop,” Morty said, wheezing. “I’m going downhill!”

Joey T.

Bless You

The Applebaums were teaching their five-year-old son Moishe how to make berachot before he ate. He was having some trouble so his mother told him that if he can’t remember what to say, he can just say, “Thank you, Hashem, for this delicious food.”

One evening, however, Moishie’s mother noticed that he thanked Hashem for the birds, the trees, each of his friends, and asked Gd to watch over his family and help them all. Moishie’s mother thought it was so cute and heartfelt.

But after Moishie took a spoonful of soup, he gasped, then dropped his spoon into the bowl. “I should have said a longer prayer,” he said. “My food is still too hot.”

Elizabeth D.

Fish Cake

Josh walks into Yossi’s Kosher Fish Mart with a fish under his arm.

“Do you have any fishcakes?” Josh asks.

“Yes, of course,” says Yossi, the store owner.

“Great,” replies Josh, nodding at the fish under his arm. “Today’s his birthday!”

Morris M.

Helping Hand

Morris was having trouble in school so his father decided to start tutoring him. Unfortunately, his grades were not improving.

“Look at this paper!” Mr. Applebaum said to Morris, frustrated. “How could one person make so many mistakes!?”

“It wasn’t one person!” Morris replied defensively. “My father helped!”

Elana  G.

Map Quest

Professor Hadari was teaching advanced map reading in his earth sciences class at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes Professor Hadari asked, “Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude, and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude…?”

After a moment of silence, a student named Itzik volunteered, “I guess you’d be eating alone.”

David M.

Dreaming in Hebrew

Joey was having some trouble in Hebrew class.

To encourage him, his teacher, Mrs. Shalva, said, “You’ll know you’re really beginning to get it when you start dreaming in Hebrew.”

One day, Joey ran into class all excited, saying, “Mrs. Shalva! I had a dream last night and everyone was talking in Hebrew!”

“Great!” said Mrs. Shalva. “What were they saying?”

“I don’t know,” Joey replied. “I couldn’t understand them.”

Michael  B.

A Big Pain

“Oy!” groaned old Samuel. “I must have appendicitis,” he said as he clutched his left side.

“It can’t be appendicitis,” said his wife, Myra, confidently.

“How do you know?” asked Samuel. “You are a doctor all of a sudden?”

“I’m not a doctor but I do know that your appendix is on the right side of your body.”

“Aha!” said Samuel. “THAT’s why it hurts so much. My appendix is on the wrong side!”

Eli  A.

Riddles – September 2025

RIDDLE:  On the Right Track

Submitted by:  Kelly B.

A train 1-mile long is traveling at a speed of one mile per minute through a tunnel 1-mile long. How long will it take for the train to completely pass through the tunnel?

Last Month’s Riddle: The Underwater Challenge

A magician was bragging to a crowd, “I can hold my breath underwater for a full 6 minutes!” Impressed murmurs followed – until a kid piped up, “That’s nothing! I can stay underwater for 10 minutes – no tricks, no gear, and no air pockets!” The magician laughed. “Prove it,” he said, “and I’ll give you $10,000.” The kid did… and walked away $10,000 richer.  How did the kid pull it off?

Solution: He simply filled a glass with water and held it over his head for 10 minutes!

Solved by:  Haim Solei, Family Blum, Abie Arking, Big Mike, Shelly Mizrahi, Lisa T., The Shmulster, Carl Dweck, and The Sultan Family.

JUNIOR RIDDLE:  Twin Teaser

Submitted by: Carl  M.

Two people born on the same day, from the same mother and father, but they are not twins. How is this possible?


Last Month’s Junior Riddle: An Odd Equation

Here’s a puzzler for you: 81 × 9 = 801.
Obviously, that’s not right. But with one clever move, you can make this equation true – no math needed. What do you have to do?

Solution: Turn the equation upside down. It becomes: 108 = 6 × 18.

Solved by: Frieda Tessone, Morris Kabani, Haim Soleimani, The Blum Family, Lisa T., The Big Cheese, Family Sultan, Alice Rishty, and The Shmulster.

Declaration of the Rabbisof the Sephardic-Syrian

To Our Beloved Community,

We, the undersigned rabbinic leaders of the Syrian Jewish community, write to you with a message of responsibility, urgency, and obligation. At this critical juncture in our city’s history, we declare without hesitation: every eligible member of our community must vote.

This is not about politics. It is about our sacred duty, to our families, to our schools, to our yeshivot, to our synagogues, and to our way of life. Voting is not merely a right. It is a halachic and moral responsibility. It is a declaration that we care, that we are engaged, and that we will not stand idly by while the future of our people is at stake.

The decisions being made in the coming elections, for mayor and other critical offices, will shape the future of our yeshivot, synagogues, schools, neighborhoods, and religious freedoms. We cannot afford silence. We cannot afford apathy. We dare not be passive when our way of life is on the line.

We are living in a time when the values that have allowed our community to flourish are under growing threat. The upcoming elections will have real and lasting impact on the safety of our neighborhoods, the strength of our institutions, and the ability of our children to grow up proudly and freely as Jews. To sit this out is to abdicate our communal responsibility.

This is not optional. It is a mitzvah. It is a communal obligation, like tefillah, like tzedakah, like educating our children. When we stay home and do not vote, we weaken the very foundations of the blessings we have built over generations.

Over forty years ago, Rabbi Moshe Feinstein zt”l expressed this obligation with clarity:

“The rights guaranteed by the United States Constitution and the Bill of Rights have allowed us the freedom to practice our religion without interference… Therefore, it is incumbent upon each Jewish citizen to participate in the democratic system which guards the freedoms we enjoy. The most fundamental responsibility incumbent on each individual is to register and to vote.”

We are blessed to live in a country that has allowed Torah to thrive. But that blessing must not be taken for granted. It must be protected with commitment, with unity, and with action.

We therefore implore and expect every member of our community to do the following:

Community of NY and NJ regarding voter registration

Register to vote. Show up to vote. Ensure your children, your siblings, and your friends vote. Speak about it.

Take it seriously. Treat it as a mitzvah, because it is. Our strength has always come from our dedication to Torah, to family, and to each other. With pride in our past and responsibility for our future, let us stand together, firm in our values and united in action.

May Hashem bless our community with continued protection, unity, and strength.

Rabbi Rahamim AboudRabbi Eliyahu ElbazRabbi Ely Matalon
Rabbi Yehoshua AlfiehRabbi Shlomo FarhiRabbi Yitzhak Farhi
Rabbi Ovadia AloufRabbi Joseph FaurRabbi Edmond Nahum
Rabbi Moshe ArkingRabbi Moses HaberRabbi David Ozeri
Rabbi David AshearRabbi Joey HaberRabbi Ezra Cohen Saban
Rabbi Yehuda AzancotRabbi Hillel HaberRabbi Reuven Semah
Rabbi Aviad BarhenRabbi Raymond HaberRabbi Albert Setton
Rabbi Ronald BarryRabbi Ike HanonRabbi Yoshiyahu Shammah
Rabbi Yaakov Ben HaimRabbi Avi HarariRabbi Leibel Shapiro
Rabbi Haim BenolielRabbi Rahamim HarariRabbi Sion Setton
Rabbi Raymond BeydaRabbi Abraham HayounRabbi David Shelby
Rabbi Joey BeydaRabbi Ricky HidaryRabbi Joey Soffer
Rabbi Yosef CarlebachChief Rabbi Shaul J. KassinRabbi Joey Sourur
Rabbi Shmuel ChouekaRabbi Moshe LagnadoRabbi David Sutton
Rabbi David CohenRabbi Uri LatiRabbi Harold Sutton
Rabbi Eli CohenRabbi Moshe MalkoRabbi David Tawil
Rabbi Yohai CohenRabbi Eli MansourRabbi Ikey Tawil
Rabbi Joseph DanaRabbi David MaslatonRabbi Meyer Tobias
Rabbi Shlomo DiamondRabbi Max Maslaton
Rabbi Moshe DouekRabbi Shaul Maslaton

Rosh Hashanah & Real Estate

Karen Behdar

This time of year always invites reflection. The energy shifts. The Yamim Noraim holidays approach. Kids go back to school, routines return, and many of us start asking deeper questions, not just about what we want for the year ahead, but about where we’re heading. In our families, in our work, and yes… even in our homes.

As a real estate broker, I’ve always believed that a home is never just a transaction. It’s a reflection of who we are, and often, who we’re becoming.

As Rosh Hashana approaches, it’s a good time to ask: Is my home still working for the life I’m living? Or is it time for a change?

For some people, that means realizing they’ve outgrown their space – emotionally, physically, or both. For others, it’s about anchoring down, committing to a community, or finally turning that “maybe next year” into a concrete plan.

We don’t always give ourselves permission to reassess our housing goals unless something forces it, like a rent hike, a job change, or family expansion. But Rosh Hashanah gives us a different kind of nudge. It invites us to take stock and move forward with intention.

The Real Estate Version of Teshuva

In the spirit of teshuva: returning, re-aligning, and reimagining, it’s worth asking questions such as: Does my home support the kind of life I want to build? Am I where I want to be?  Is it time to start planning a move or making this space feel more like my own?
Not every answer leads to packing boxes. Sometimes, it leads to painting a wall, fixing a long-overdue repair, or finally hosting that Shabbat dinner you’ve been meaning to. But when you start thinking about your home with intention, things shift. It becomes less about market timing and more about life alignment.

Owning as a Form of Stability

We live in a world that feels increasingly unpredictable. For many of the families I work with, owning a home isn’t just about square footage, it’s about security. It’s about feeling grounded, having control over your space, and knowing that the place where you’re making memories is truly yours.

Especially in Brooklyn, where generations of family members often live just a few blocks apart, owning a home is about more than just square footage. It’s about roots. It’s about building something that lasts for your family, your community, and the future. It’s not just a property. It’s a place in the story.

You Don’t Have to Have It All Figured Out

Here’s what I always tell clients: You don’t need to have all the answers. You just need to start asking the right questions.

If you’re feeling the pull toward something different, like a bigger space, a new neighborhood, a backyard instead of a fire escape, it might be time to explore it.

Start by having a conversation. Get clarity on your finances. Walk through a few open houses just to see how you feel. The path to a new home doesn’t begin with a signed contract. It begins with curiosity.

Rosh Hashanah is all about possibility. It’s about hope and direction, even if the details aren’t fully formed yet.

This Rosh Hashanah, while you’re setting intentions for the year ahead, it’s worth thinking about your home too: what’s working, what’s not, and what you might be ready for?

  • What would make my home feel more like the life I want to live?
  • Where do I want to grow next?
  • And what would it feel like to start moving toward that?

From all of us at The Behfar Team, we wish you a sweet, joyful, and peaceful New Year, full of clarity, connection, and comfort in every corner of your home.

Tap into New Beginnings

The day has the power to energize real change and help a person become unrecognizably different.

Rabbi Yehonasan Gefen

The spiritual forces operating at moments of beginning are unique. “Hakol holech achar harosh – Everything goes after the beginning” – the entire course of any process is determined by its beginning. This is because a beginning is a conception, and conception represents the laying down of the genes that are the blueprint for everything that is built later. The spiritual rule is that the closer something is to the moment of conception, the more potent and critical the forces: a small injury to the human body may not be of major significance for an adult. However, a fetus during its development is much more sensitive to such an event, and a minute change to the genes may have the most far-reaching results imaginable.

The Importance of New Beginnings

At the moment of conception all details are being coded most potently; it is therefore the most critical moment. No subsequent moment can ever have the intensity and significance of that first moment. The flash of conception contains everything. All later development is simply a revelation of what was created during that first flash.

Rosh Hashanah is the conception of the year and the next ten days are its gestation. That is why these days are so critical to the whole year. That is why a person is judged for the entire year as he appears on Rosh Hashanah – the personality as it exists then is the core. It will take supreme effort to change later. Change on Rosh Hashanah is much easier – one can manipulate the “genes” of one’s character then. People of spiritual knowledge take extreme care to live as perfectly as possible on Rosh Hashanah – the year is being conceived.

Rosh Hashanah’s Unique Energy

What is the source of this special energy? The first Rosh Hashanah ever, which of course must represent its true nature most powerfully, was the day of the Creation of man. That day of Creation was the world’s first Rosh Hashanah, and its climactic event was the Creation of the human. That is why this day always retains its power to re-create man. When we genuinely and intensely decide to elevate our personalities on Rosh Hashanah and become inspired to live the coming year as higher beings, we are using the day’s deeply rooted energy as the day of human creation. The day has the power to energize real change and help a person become unrecognizably different.

There is an idea that Adam was created at the very place that would later be the mizbeach (altar) in the Temple. “Adam mi’makom kaparato nivra – Adam was created from the place of his atonement.” His very first moment of life was generated from earth that was gathered from all parts of the world, but that was concentrated on the one spot that would later become the site of sacrifices – that activity that most powerfully atones and brings man close to the Divine. Adam’s moment of creation is at once the most intense newness possible and also contains the element of the most intense change possible – from sin to atonement, which is really new creation itself. Hence, the unfathomable power of Rosh Hashanah to help us to become new. Little wonder that the mystical custom is to minimize sleep on Rosh Hashanah.

Significance of the Order of the Tefillah

The service of the day reflects this idea of reaching for the root. The order of prayer is based on Malchuyot (kingship), Zichronot (memory), and Shofrot (shofar-blowing).

Kingship

Malchuyotrepresents the effort of renewing the root of all Creation and all service – establishing that Hashem’s rule is absolute and primary. Before accepting the yoke of specific mitzvotwe must accept Hashem’s kingship in general, as expressed in the famous mashal (parable) of a great king who was asked to decree laws for a country. The king agreed only on condition that the people first accept his sovereignty over them. Only then would his laws be binding and meaningful. The root of Creation is Hashem’s Kingship, and so too is the root of all spiritual growth. This realization is the most primary of all on Rosh Hashanah, and it requires a delving into the deepest level of ratzon (desire) during the prayer service to reach the consciousness of and desire for Hashem’s complete rule.

Memory

Zichronot represents the idea of remembering in true spiritual depth the points of origin of the world and of the Jewish people and its destiny. This deep form of memory is a re-entering of the male phase of new conception – to go back to the initial flash or spark and re-live it vividly and literally. The root of zachor, “remember,” is identical with zachar “male.” The connection should be obvious. Maleness is exactly that: a carrying over of the distilled essence of all previous generations in a seed that will form the next generation. The seed is a “memory” of the past. In fact, the words “memory” and “seed” are numerically equivalent in Hebrew. The work of memory, re-living the flash of creation, is perfectly fitting and necessary for Rosh Hashanah. 

Shofar-Blowing

Shofrotindicates, along the lines we have been discussing, reaching for the heart, reaching for the root of the neshama and the personality. The essence of the shofar is that it has a voice but no words. The mystics explain that the voice is the root of speech and contains far more than the individual finite words. Words may convey information, but the voice conveys the essence of a person. This is why prophecy is referred to as “voice,” not words: when Hashem tells Avraham to listen to Sarah’s prophetic advice the verse says: “Shma b’kola – Listen to her voice,” not “Listen to her words.”

Hashem tells the prophet: “Kra b’garon, al tachsoch – Cry out in your throat, do not hold back.” Prophecy is not from the mouth, the origin of words, but from the throat, the origin of raw sound. The blessing we pronounce on hearing the shofar is “lishmo’a kol shofar,” to “hear the voice of the shofar.” The shofar is raw sound, a raw cry, and that is why it has the power to open the neshama. All the words in the world cannot convey the emotion of the scream of a child in the night. The shofar is that scream.

Rosh Hashanah correctly lived should leave one supercharged. The energy achieved should be so great that the rest of the year can be lived accordingly – not as a continuation but as a constant experience of newness! Spark must become flame, and that flame must spark a new blaze, always. That is Jewish living. There is a mystical idea that being alive today because one was alive yesterday is called dying. Being really alive means that one’s life is generated today, not as a passive result of the past, but as an explosion of newness, now and always.

Spiritual Renewal

The Hebrew root ani meaning “I” has two fascinating derivatives, ana and ayin. The word ayin means “is not.” Ana is much harder to translate. It indicates an inexpressible pleading or longing as in: “Ana Hashem hoshi’a na,” the longing for redemption. These words, ayin “is not,” and ana, intense hope for the future, also mean “from where” and “to where.” When one wants to ask, “Where have you come from?” one says, “Me’ayin ba’ta?” When one wants to say, “Where are you going?” one says “Ana telech (or le’an)?” But incredibly, if one stops to consider the literal meaning of these expressions, a most inspiring depth becomes apparent: me’ayin ba’ta – “From where have you come?” literally means “You come from nothingness”! And ana telech – “Where are you going?” literally means “You are going to an inexpressibly great dimension”!

Hebrew, the language of holiness, is pregnant with spiritual depth. The simple, mundane idea of a person arriving from some previous place is expressed in common Hebrew as the transition from nothingness to his present state (yesh me’ayin – something from nothing!). In other words, the spiritual grasp of this moment is that it is relative to the previous moment, as existence compared to nothingness! That is newness! And from this moment to the next, the explosion is so great that it cannot be translated! That is the striving of a spiritually sensitive person, to generate a new inner life continually.  Avraham Avinu says of himself, “Va’anochi afar va’efer – And I am dust and ashes.” Torah is never mere poetry – every nuance has infinite meaning. What is the meaning of “dust and ashes”?

The idea is this. Ashes are the bare elements left when a substance has been completely burned. “Dust” of the earth is the rich soil in which growth takes place. Avraham, who most profoundly represents the idea of newness, of being the father, the founder of the Jewish people, who forged a whole new way of living, sees himself as constantly incinerating what he has become, in order to use those elements as soil for new growth. No element of his development is allowed to continue passively, here today because it was here yesterday. All of Avraham’s being is distilled into a memory that is the nucleus for a new birth – constantly! That is the power of hiddush, self-generating newness, the source of spiritual life and growth.

Sailing Relationships with R’ Ali – September 2025

QUESTION: 

Dear Rabbi Ali,

I have been married for 14 years. From the beginning, things were rocky and we knew we needed to seek out help. We were guided to speak with a marriage counselor. Fourteen years later and five therapists later we are pretty much exactly where we started. Maybe we had some success, but ultimately ended up with the same old issues. Are we doing something wrong ? Why can’t we get it right ? I’d appreciate any perspective as I do appreciate your marriage insights. Thank you. 

R’ Ali’s Response: 

With Hashem’s help, I will offer some ideas as to why you are possibly not “getting it right,” and suggest some ideas as to what you can do to head in the right direction. Unfortunately, this situation is not uncommon, as many of my clients complain about the same thing. 

When seeking help in marriage (and all areas of life for that matter ) we have to know what it is that we’re looking for. Yes, of course, we’re looking to get our marriage in order or better our relationship, but what exactly do we want ? Do we want a third party to explain to our spouse where they’re going wrong? If so, this approach will inevitably fail (for the most part). This is one of the reasons that I see couples “therapy hopping.” There are three problems with this approach.

One, your spouse may get defensive and feel attacked if they sense that all you want to do is fix them. It’s irrelevant if they are the cause of the problems or not, most people don’t want to be told they are “the problem.”

Two, out of fear or force, they may agree to change things that they either can’t change or need a lot of time to change. For example, a wife may complain that her husband is not “present” when they are together. He may promise to be “present” from now on. This gives the wife false hope and leaves her frustrated when eventually she sees him “slipping up.” 

And third, when one person believes that they are fine and there’s nothing for them to do, while their spouse is faulty, then basically one person is getting “helped,” while the other is waiting around. Meaning to say it never turned into “couples” therapy at all. The couple will continue this cycle with the counselor until they realize they are going nowhere, which causes them to discard the therapist for another.

The next approach is when there are many disagreements, and the couple is looking for someone to “decide” who is wrong and who is right. Each one assumes they are “right” and would like the third party to side with them. I’m assuming they’re hoping the therapist will finally explain to their spouse how they were mistaken all of these years! This fails for obvious reasons and in turn on to the next.

The last approach is better, but also has flaws. When two people are willing to hear someone out (and not put the blame on one another) but become upset at the therapist when they are told that they need to work on certain things they disagree with or they weren’t “validated,” which turns them off. 

I don’t know if this is your situation but I’ve seen these scenarios so many times it’s very likely you fall under one of these categories. Also, it is worthwhile entertaining the possibility that all five counselors were not missing the mark. That’s a lot of professionals who are unable to help. 

So, how should a professional be approached? In my opinion it’s with humility and unity. “WE are not understanding each other (unity).  WE are not getting anywhere, let’s go to a professional and see how WE can work this out. If both parties have an understanding that it’s not me vs. you, rather WE  together are stuck, your starting point is much better. The attitude of “maybe we’re missing something” is a winning attitude. “Maybe I’m doing something wrong,” (humility)  is a way to be successful with marriage counseling. 

Let’s take a common scenario to understand this better: husband and wife have been arguing about finances for years. One says the other is cheap, the other says the other is an over spender. This can go on for years with each one proving their point with zero success. At this point, the couple should stop and say, “Hey, we obviously see things differently and need some help to sort things out, let’s reach out for advice on how to deal with our differences.”  Maybe it’s time to approach the marriage counselor in a unified and humble way, and with Hashem’s help you will finally have seen your last marriage counselor.

The Cons Close to Home: How Scammers Target New York, New Jersey, and Jewish Communities

Dave Gordon

You think you’re too savvy to be scammed. We all do. But the unsettling truth is that modern fraudsters have elevated deception to an art form, weaving themselves into our daily routines and exploiting the people, institutions, and events we trust the most. In neighborhoods from Brooklyn to Lakewood, Monsey to Passaic, scams are no longer rare cautionary tales – they’re a weekly threat, circulating through WhatsApp groups, whispered in synagogue foyers, and cropping up in local newspaper headlines.

It starts small. An email from your rabbi. A call from your grandchild. A pop‑up on your computer. Each one feels just plausible enough, just urgent enough, to push you past skepticism. And then – in minutes – your savings, your peace of mind, and your trust are gone.

Here are real stories of fraud in our communities, reported by reputable media outlets, tied to exact dates and places. Together, they create a portrait of a crime wave hiding in plain sight.

The Brooklyn Computer Con

Recently, CBS News New York ran an exclusive story by investigator Mahsa Saeidi about a 75‑year‑old woman from Brooklyn who lost $100,000 in a deception that began with a locked computer screen. A pop‑up message told her to call a number. On the line, a voice claiming to be from Microsoft warned that her bank accounts had been compromised. The man guided her step by step – first to the bank to withdraw her funds “for safe keeping,” then to an in-person rendezvous. He gave her a secret code word – “red” – before sending a fake courier to collect the envelope. By the time she realized that she had been coached into surrendering money, the cash was gone.

Police say this hybrid scam – part tech support hoax, part old‑fashioned face‑to‑face con – is targeting older residents in Brooklyn who live alone. Its sophistication lies in how it turns modern technology’s veneer of authority into a weapon.

Social Security Scams in New Jersey

Government impersonation scams might sound like a distant problem, but a high‑profile case in New Jersey made headlines on April 24, 2025, when the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the District of New Jersey announced that 68‑year‑old Deborah Bailey of Piscataway had pleaded guilty to stealing $150,903 in Social Security benefits. For eight years after her mother’s death, Bailey quietly continued to withdraw her late mother’s retirement checks. While that case involved a relative exploiting a loophole, the prosecution noted that fake “Social Security” calls are proliferating statewide – with con artists posing as federal agents who claim your Social Security number has been “frozen” and threaten arrest unless you transfer money immediately. Officials stress that legitimate agencies never ask for payment by gift card, wire transfer, or cryptocurrency, yet these methods appear in nearly every successful scam they investigate.

The Deepfaked Grandchild Emergency

The classic “grandchild in trouble” scam took on a sinister technological twist in March 2025, as NPRreported from the Upper West Side of Manhattan and Passaic, New Jersey. Senior citizens began receiving not only panicked phone calls but also what appeared to be FaceTime videos from their own grandchildren – begging for bail money after supposed car accidents or arrests. In one documented case, a retired couple wired thousands of dollars to an account provided by the caller, believing it was to secure their grandson’s release in Vermont. Only hours later did they discover he had been at home all along. Investigators believe Montreal‑based criminal groups are behind the wave, using stolen personal data and AI‑generated voice and video “deepfakes” to trick even the most cautious targets.

Fake Charity Appeals in Boro Park and Lakewood

When tragedy strikes – a fatal fire before Shabbat, a family caught in an anti-Semitic attack, or a sudden medical emergency – Jewish communities act quickly. Scammers know this. Media outlets from Hamodiato The Jewish Presshave covered how, during such crises, residents of Boro Park in Brooklyn and the yeshiva community of Lakewood, New Jersey, are bombarded with WhatsApp messages and phone calls from “fundraisers” claiming to represent respected charities. Messages often include blurred photos, real names from local news reports, and fabricated payment links redirecting donations to private accounts. In some cases, community members have emptied their savings on the assumption they were aiding neighbors, only to find that the “emergency fund” never existed. Misaskim, the respected crisis‑response group, has issued repeated public alerts warning donors to slow down and verify before giving.

The Rabbi Gift Card Scam

One of the fastest‑growing frauds doesn’t come out of a high‑tech lab, but it’s brutally effective. Last September, the Federal Trade Commission issued a consumer alert after multiple synagogues in the New York area reported emails and texts from scammers posing as rabbis or synagogue presidents. The messages used familiar greetings and urgent tones – “I’m at a meeting and need a favor” – and asked congregants to buy gift cards for “families in crisis” or “a shul project.” Recipients were told to scratch off the security strip, photograph the numbers, and send them back via text or email. Once the numbers are sent, the value is drained within minutes, leaving no recourse for the victim. The FTC emphasized that no genuine rabbi or community leader will ever make such a request.

Final Thoughts

Trust is a cornerstone of Jewish communal life. But trust without verification is exactly what scammers need to succeed. The cases from Brooklyn, Lakewood, Passaic, Monsey, and beyond – each documented by reputable news outlets or government agencies – remind us that fraud is both hyper‑local and globally connected. Whether it’s a stranger on the phone using your grandson’s voice or a longtime neighborhood business adding a “holiday surcharge,” scams today are designed to slip past your defenses.

The simplest, hardest lesson is to pause before you act. Make that extra call, search that name, confirm that email. In the war between caution and con artists, hesitation isn’t weakness – it’s strength. In our communities, a moment’s doubt can be the only thing standing between you and the next devastating loss.

Scam Tactics

These cases show common threads in modern fraud:

  • They Impersonate Trusted Figures: a rabbi, a tech support representative, even a family member.
  • They Manipulate Urgency: making you believe that hesitation will cause harm or loss.
  • They exploit community knowledge: citing real local news, synagogue events, or religious obligations.
  • They Adjust Tactics to Technology: using spoofed numbers, AI‑generated videos, or hacked email accounts.

What makes them especially dangerous in Jewish neighborhoods across NY and NJ is the deep‑rooted culture of trust and fast action in emergencies – the very qualities scammers weaponize.

Guarding Against the Next Con

FBI agents, state attorneys general, and local police departments give the same advice:

Verify Independently – Call known official numbers, not the ones provided in a message.

Slow Down – No legitimate cause will collapse for lack of a same‑day transfer.

Refuse Unusual Payment Methods – Gift cards, crypto, or wire transfers are almost always red flags.

Educate the Vulnerable – Hold scam‑awareness sessions in shuls, schools, and senior centers. Communities should also normalize healthy skepticism. In the United States, the FBI estimates that elders lose over $3 billion each year to these schemes. That’s a number that can only grow if people keep treating suspicious requests as impolite to question.

Tech That Makes the Grade: Back-to-School Gear That Delivers

Back-to-school season is the perfect time to refresh your gear and set yourself up for a successful year. Whether you’re returning to campus, heading into a new classroom, or just embracing a fresh start, having the right gadgets can streamline your routine, boost productivity, and make everyday tasks more enjoyable. Here are eight standout items that are practical, thoughtfully designed, and ready to elevate your daily routine.

OXO Sweep & Swipe Laptop Cleaner
Compact and affordable, the OXO Sweep & Swipe is the perfect tool for keeping your tech spotless. It features a retractable soft brush for sweeping dust and debris from keyboards, and a microfiber pad that effortlessly wipes smudges from screens on laptops, tablets, smartphones, and more. It’s a simple, effective way to keep your gadgets looking their best.

The Ridge Bolt Action Pen – Alpine Navy
Blending analog charm with premium materials, the Ridge Bolt Action Pen is a stylish alternative to screen time. Crafted from lightweight aluminum, this durable writing tool is satisfying to click, smooth to write with, and available in a range of finishes – from bold and modern to understated and classic. It’s a great addition to any student’s everyday carry.

Troubadour Apex Backpack 3.0
Designed for students and professionals alike, the Troubadour Apex Backpack 3.0 combines sleek aesthetics with serious utility. It boasts a spacious interior with numerous compartments, including a dedicated sleeve for a large laptop and room for a tablet and accessories. Built to carry up to 50 pounds, it’s a rugged yet refined option for those on the move.

Hatch Restore 3 Sunrise Alarm Clock
The Hatch Restore 3 is more than just an alarm clock – it’s a personal sleep coach. This smart bedside device uses a simulated sunrise to wake you gently, while offering calming sounds and a warm, sunset-like glow to help you wind down. With white noise and ambient sound options to mask distractions, it can improve your sleep quality night after night.

Pelican Marine AirTag Holder
When it comes to protecting your AirTag, the Pelican Marine Holder is unmatched. Constructed with a rugged, shock-resistant shell reinforced by ultra-strong Dupont Kevlar, it’s built to endure harsh conditions. The IP68 rating means it’s fully waterproof and dustproof, making it ideal for travel, outdoor adventures, or just everyday peace of mind.

SoundcoreAeroFit 2 Open-Ear Headphones
The SoundcoreAeroFit 2 delivers an open-ear listening experience that’s comfortable, safe, and surprisingly immersive. These wireless earphones rest outside the ear canal – no tips required – making them ideal for all-day wear. With a sleek design, customizable sound through the companion app, 10-hour battery life, and several color options, they offer exceptional value and performance.

Flashforge AD5M 3D Printer
For aspiring creators or experienced makers on a budget, the Flashforge AD5M 3D Printer is a standout choice. This compact machine can quickly print detailed, multi-material objects with ease. It features built-in auto-leveling and a user-friendly interface with touchscreen controls and app connectivity, making it a powerful tool that’s also beginner-friendly.Satechi Qi2 Trio Wireless Charging Pad
Apple users looking for an elegant, efficient charging solution will love the Satechi Qi2 Trio 3-in-1 Wireless Charging Pad. It can charge an iPhone, Apple Watch, and AirPods simultaneously at full speed, thanks to Qi2 compatibility and MagSafe support. Its flexible design allows it to transform from a sleek upright stand to a flat pad, with Apple Watch support for both flat and nightstand modes.