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Inventions & Innovators

The First Roller Coaster in America

On June 16, 1884, the first roller coaster in America opened at Coney Island, in Brooklyn, New York. It consisted of three wooden hills connected by curved tracks, with a top speed of six miles per hour – nothing like the thrill machines we see today!

Russian Coasters

The earliest roller coasters were large ice-covered slides made of wood.

LaMarcus Thompson

Born in Ohio, Mr. Thompson is widely known as the father of the roller coaster.

Loop-the-Loop

The Loop-the-Loop coaster opened in 1901 at Coney Island. It eventually closed because more people were willing to watch than ride.

Brooklyn Cyclone

The Cyclone, a wooden coaster that made its debut on Coney Island in 1927, is one of the country’s oldest coasters in operation today.

Inventions are the ingenious gadgets and machines that have made our lives a little more fun, interesting, and useful. Real inventions are the things that we did not think were possible yesterday, and yet, it would be difficult to live without today. From the tiny paperclip to the massive jet engine, every month we will explore the history behind our world’s most famous inventions and learn about the innovators who designed them.

This month we explore the history behind one of the most popular amusement park rides…

The ROLLER COASTER

Roller coasters are one of the most popular amusement park rides. The fascinating history of roller coasters began in Russia in the early 1800s, when a wheeled cart was designed to go down an icy track. This prototype proved quite popular, as people lined up for hours to ride on the rails – something no one had ever seen before! From there, roller coasters took off around the globe.

First American Roller Coaster

In 1884, Ohio native LaMarcus Adna Thompson patented the “Switchback Railway,” the first American roller coaster. It made its debut at Coney Island in Brooklyn, New York. The coaster was made of wood and featured a single track with sharp turns and three steep hills. It was designed to run down a hill and then use gravity to propel riders back up the other side.

Ask Jido – October 2025

Dear Jido, 

My son is a devoted father and truly wants the best for his kids. He’s passionate about sports and volunteers as a coach for his 12-year-old son – my grandson – in various leagues. While his intentions are good, I worry that his approach can be too intense. At times, he critiques his son’s performance during or after games, sometimes loudly and in public, which seems to leave my grandson feeling discouraged or embarrassed.

I’ve gently tried to talk to my son about how his words might be affecting his child’s confidence, but he insists he’s just being honest and helping him toughen up. My daughter-in-law shares my concerns but isn’t sure how to intervene effectively either. It’s hard to watch because I know my son loves his family deeply and wants his son to succeed, but I fear this coaching style may be doing more harm than good.

How can we help him see that support and encouragement can go hand in hand with teaching and discipline?

Signed,

Worried Grandma

Dear Grandma,

Someone once asked Rabbi Avigdor Miller, zt”l, if a parent sees his son doing something wrong, is he allowed to yell at him in public. His answer was typical Rabbi Miller. He answered – the father should go over to the son, take his hand in one of his hands, rub his cheek with the other hand and tell him how much he loves him. What about the fact that the child was doing something wrong? No mention. The child just needs to know that his father loves him.

Does that mean that Rabbi Miller is condoning bad behavior? Certainly not – he is suggesting that whatever the father says to the son afterwards is going to be obeyed because the boy knows that it’s coming from a place of love.

Your grandson certainly hasn’t done anything wrong. He just may not excel to the point that his father wants him to. Tell your son, “Shouts short circuits, but HUGS HIT HOMERS.”

If you can say that three times fast, it’s bound to make an impression.

Jido

The Road to the 2025 M&S World Series

Sam Sutton

The lights at M&S Park shine brightest in the postseason. The 2025 M&S Playoffs delivered everything – slugfests, web gems, heartbreak, and the rise of new stars. From the opening Wild Card to the Semifinals chaos, every pitch mattered. Now the World Series stage is set: Kaboom vs. King Salomon Part Deux.

Wild Card: Vandelay 12 – Stayin’ Alive 7

The postseason opened with fireworks. Vandelay Industries slugged their way past Stayin’ Alive in a 12–7 shootout, powered by Nussi, who was locked in at the plate, and Wamma, who drove in runs and flashed leather all night.

The defining moment came on defense – with Stayin’ Alive threatening, Sammy Seruya and Wamma turned a game-changing double play that crushed momentum. Jimmy Malakh pitched with grit, keeping Vandelay steady against a dangerous lineup.

Stayin’ Alive refused to go quietly. Bresher launched a no-doubt bomb over the fence to jolt his squad, but it wasn’t enough. Vandelay’s defense carried the day and booked a semifinal showdown with #1 seed Kaboom.

Semifinals Night 1: Longhorns (#2) vs King Salomon Pt Deux (#3)

The first semifinal night was classic. The #2 Longhorns and #3 King Salomon Pt Deux clashed in a best-of-two set, and King Salomon swept both games in thrilling fashion.

Game 1 ended 7–6, with the tying runs stranded on base.

Game 2? Pure chaos. Locked in a tie, Eric Cytryn delivered the swing of the series – a rocket into the right-field gap that rolled out for a home run. The clutch blast broke the deadlock, sent the King Salomon dugout into a frenzy, and completely unraveled the Longhorns. Then momentum belonged to King Salomon.

The highlight reel didn’t end there:

· Rookie phenom JoJo “Box Office” Levy launched his third bomb of the season, a no-doubt nuke that shook the Park.

· Nathan Kushner stole runs with an impossible over-the-shoulder grab.

· And Cytryn closed the series with a diving catch in center to secure the sweep.

Final: King Salomon swept the Longhorns in two games and advanced to the World Series.

Semifinals Night 2: Kaboom (#1) vs. Vandelay Industries (Wild Card)

The second semifinal night belonged to #1 seed Kaboom. Facing Wild Card survivor Vandelay Industries, they delivered a sweep of their own.

Game 1 turned into a pitcher’s duel. Abe Saka was dominant on the hill for Kaboom. Jimmy Malakh stunned the Park with his own shutdown stuff for Vandelay. Both offenses struggled to break through – until chaos struck. With the game on the line, Sol Fallas made a jaw-dropping, game-saving diving catch to end it. One of the greatest plays in postseason history.

Game 2 saw Kaboom’s lineup break free. Patient at-bats and timely hits piled up runs, and their defense stayed sharp. Vandelay battled but ran out of steam.

Final: Kaboom swept Vandelay in two games, locking in their World Series date with King Salomon Pt Deux.

The World Series: Kaboom vs. King Salomon Pt Deux

Now, the finale. Two rosters built for this moment.

Kaboom, captained by Uri Adler, looked like the juggernaut all season. They’ll lean on ace Abe Saka, the ripped power-hitting force Sol Fallas, and a lineup that knows how to grind. Veterans Barry Finkel, a former postseason hero with a walk-off World Series winner on his résumé, MoMo Levy, and Nutty Aurbach bring leadership, playoff experience, and plenty of pop.

King Salomon Part Deux, led by Hall of Famer Michael “Sabon” Salomon, comes with equal firepower. They’re anchored by the legendary Mo Shamah, the elite all-around threat Zack “Z” Ashkenazie, and steady arm Yitz Sutton – who once pitched a perfect game in the World Series and is hungry to add another championship to his career. Add in championship-tested leaders like Teddy Ishak and Sammy Esses, and this team has the pedigree and resilience to shock anyone.

Throw in the breakout rookie JoJo Levy, the always-clutch Eric Cytryn, and their hungry supporting cast, and King Salomon comes into the World Series with swagger.

Two Giants. Two Paths. One Cup.

Will it be Kaboom’s year, or will King Salomon’s mix of legends and young guns capture the immortal M&S Cup?

Stay tuned…

Mabrouk – October 2025

Births – Baby Boy

Mr. & Mrs. Max Sutton

Albert & Kaden Terzi

Maurice & Sonia Mosseri

Bert & Lizzy Chabot

Joe & Claudia Epstein

Ofir & Merlene Zehavi

Solly & Esther Mosseri

Donny & Michelle Nakar

Dennis & Nicole Dweck

Births – Baby Girl

Albert & Esther Cohen

Isaac & Lauren Dana

Isaac & Juliana Nasar

Eddie& Reina Levy

Ralph & Raquel Massry

Joe & Marcy Gammal

Morris & Fortune Chera

Teddy & Eileen Braha

Sol & Sari Cohen

Bar Mitzvahs

Manny, son of Michael and Etti Menahem

Engagements

Zach Kassin to Sarina Dadoun

Aharon Cohen to Gali Cohen

Leor Keda to Hannah Dayon

Moshe Sutton to Deborah Ashkenazi

Elliot Setton to Terry Gindi

Henry Tawil to Deborah Sutton

Morris Zarif to Ruthie Khaski

Victor Salem to Moselle Zeitouni

Weddings

David Tawil to Iris Esses

Michael Gammal to Naomi Dayan

Meyer Sakkal to Jamie Shamah

Joey Dayon to Sarah Siri

Larry Natkin to Rachel Fallas

Jews at Risk Under Mamdani

“Imagine encampments spilling into residential neighborhoods, protests outside synagogues, mobs outside schools, and police ordered to do nothing. Under a Mamdani administration, it will not be a question of if these things happen. It will be a question of when.”

Linda Sadacka

From Baghdad to Aleppo, from Cairo to Beirut, from Damascus to Tripoli, Jewish communities once flourished. They created schools and synagogues, vibrant markets, and family homes. They poured everything into neighborhoods they believed would last forever. Yet time and again, when hostile leaders rose to power and law enforcement looked the other way, those communities vanished. Families were uprooted, businesses destroyed, lives shattered.

In New York, many believed it could never happen here. They said America was different, safe, permanent. Yet history warns us that it can happen anywhere. Today, with Zohran Mamdani, a self-proclaimed radical and candidate of the Democratic Socialists of America, leading in the mayoral race, those echoes are becoming frighteningly familiar.

Who Is Zohran Mamdani?

Zohran Mamdani is not a mainstream politician. He is a radical whose public record should alarm every New Yorker.

He defended the slogan “Globalize the Intifada,” a phrase embraced by extremists as a call to spread violence against Jews beyond the Middle East. Despite criticism, he attempted to sanitize the phrase, even as respected institutions condemned it as dangerous. He declined to denounce DSA’s anti-Zionist resolutions and instead doubled down, claiming he is accountable only to “the people.” He has also stated, “If you win an election, you go ahead and implement the platform, even if you do not have a majority mandate.” That is a promise to impose an ideology regardless of public consent.

He has said, “Billionaires should not exist,” adopting rhetoric that directly targets Jewish values of enterprise, ownership, and family legacy. He stood alongside Bernie Sanders at rallies against “oligarchy,” calling for rent freezes, free buses, and punitive taxes on the businesses and families that fuel New York’s economy.

Mamdani’s platform includes dismantling capitalism and abolishing landlords, which many see as a direct attack on the Jewish community that has long relied on property ownership to provide stability and continuity for families. He advocates slashing police budgets, empowering radical protest movements, and normalizing reckless policies that weaken law and order. He has spoken about creating a borderless America, a vision that would overwhelm already fragile city resources.

These are not quiet opinions. They are public declarations, proudly and unapologetically defended.

The Danger of a Mayor Mamdani

History already showed us what happens when a mayor refuses to protect his city. Under David Dinkins, New York witnessed the Crown Heights riots. For three painful days, mobs targeted Jews while police were ordered to stand down. The result was violence, destruction, and death.

Now imagine a mayor who is not merely hesitant, but ideologically committed to siding with radicals. Imagine encampments spilling into residential neighborhoods, protests outside synagogues, mobs outside schools, and police ordered to do nothing. Under a Mamdani administration, it will not be a question of if these things happen. It will be a question of when.

When that day comes, the NYPD will have no choice but to obey the mayor’s orders. That is the power of the office. That is why this election matters more than any other in recent memory.

What We Stand to Lose

Our community has invested generations of work into this city. We have built schools, synagogues, and community centers that serve tens of thousands of families. We have supported businesses that drive New York’s economy. We have turned entire neighborhoods into sanctuaries for Jewish life.

All of that is now at risk.

Families are already whispering questions at Shabbat tables and community events. What will we do if he wins? Do we leave? Do we uproot everything? The fear is real, and it is growing. People understand what is at stake: safety, security, and the very survival of our way of life in New York.

It is not just activists raising the alarm. The rabbinic leadership of our community has spoken with one voice, issuing a letter that removes any doubt about the urgency of this moment. In their words:

“Every eligible member of our community must vote. This is not about politics. It is about our sacred duty to our families, to our schools, to our yeshivot, to our synagogues, and to our way of

life. Voting is not merely a right. It is a halachic and moral responsibility. We cannot afford silence. We cannot afford apathy. This is not optional. It is a mitzvah, a communal obligation, like tefillah, like tzedakah, like educating our children.”

When every rabbi of the Syrian-Sephardic community of New York and New Jersey signs a letter like this, it is not rhetoric. It is a clarion call. They are telling us plainly: our future, and the future of our children, will be decided by what we do in this election.

A Shadow of Privilege

For someone who rails against privilege, Mamdani’s background tells another story.

His mother, filmmaker Mira Nair, has enjoyed generous Qatari patronage. Qatar’s ruling family financed her 2012 film The Reluctant Fundamentalist, supported her Maisha Film Labs, and paid for a lavish adaptation of Monsoon Wedding during the World Cup. These were not token cultural gestures. They were major investments from a regime that uses money as political leverage.

Why does this matter? Because Qatar is not a benign patron of the arts. It is the single largest financier of Hamas. It bankrolls extremist clerics, shelters terror leaders, and pours billions into propaganda networks that delegitimize Israel. When Qatar invests, it is never charity. It is strategy.

So while Mamdani preaches about justice and rails against “privilege,” his family has benefited from the largesse of a regime that enables the very terror groups murdering Jews in Israel. That contradiction is not nuance. It is a red flag.

The Awakening

And yet, thank Gd, something extraordinary is happening.

For too long, good people avoided politics. That era is ending. Schools are now telling parents: you cannot register your child unless you are registered to vote. Synagogues and community centers are requiring voter registration for participation. Even singles events are saying: no registration, no entry.

This is nothing short of historic. For the first time, our community understands that survival depends on civic engagement.

But registration is only the beginning. It is not enough to sign a form. We must vote. We must show up on Election Day and make our voices heard. Otherwise, all this newfound effort will mean nothing.

Years of Warnings

As an activist, I have been saying this for years. I have written, spoken, pleaded, and urged action. I said it when people rolled their eyes. I said it when people insisted politics would never touch us.

Now, at last, the community is mobilizing. Volunteers are registering voters outside stores, in schools, and even at social gatherings. Their work is extraordinary and deserves recognition. But it should not have taken fear to push people into action.

The past is behind us. What matters is what we do now.

A Community on the Move

The energy is real. Families are recognizing the stakes. Institutions are demanding accountability. Volunteers are carrying clipboards and voter forms because they know our survival depends on it.

Beginnings matter only if they lead to results. Registration is the first step; turnout is the test. The ballot box is where this awakening must be proven.

Politics does not reward intentions; it rewards action. The radicals know this, which is why they always show up. If we match our convictions with ballots, we will decide the future of this city. If we stay home, others will decide for us, and the outcome will be one we cannot accept.

The choice is clear, the responsibility is ours, and this time no one will be able to say they were not warned.

Medical Halacha – Taking Medication and Birkat Hamapil: Sleep, Health, and Halachic Priorities

Albert’s email arrived at 11:47pm: “Rabbi, I said Birkat Hamapil with Kriat Shema al HaMitah, but I’m lying here wide awake. I realized I forgot to take my blood pressure medication tonight. And I need some juice with melatonin to help with my jet lag. I was told not to speak or eat after Hamapil, but if I don’t sleep well, I’ll struggle to get up for Shacharit and will feel groggy all morning.”

The Nature of Birkat Hamapil: Praise, Not Benefit

To answer Albert’s question we first need to distinguish between two categories of brachot: Birkat HaNehenin (blessings over benefits like eating or drinking) and Birkat HaShevach (blessings of praise). Hacham Ovadia Yosef, zt”l, addresses this in Yechave Da’at (Vol. 4, 21), explaining that Birkat Hamapil belongs to the Shevach category rather than the Nehenin category.

Consider the parallel: every morning we recite “Hanoten La’Sechvi Binah”- “Who has given the rooster understanding to distinguish between day and night” – even when no rooster crows nearby. These brachot belong to the category of Shevach, praising Hashem’s orchestration of natural cycles.

Since Birkat Hamapil praises Hashem for the gift of sleep rather than being dependent on the actual act of immediate sleep – unlike eating that requires immediate consumption after the bracha – the bracha of Hampil remains valid even if sleep doesn’t immediately follow. Therefore, Hacham Ovadia rules, the bracha should be recited with Shem U’Malchut – mentioning Hashem’s Name and Kingship – regardless of whether one falls asleep quickly. Hacham Ben Zion Abba Shaul, zt”l, (Ohr LeTzion 2, 15:12) concurs while acknowledging that some people have the minhag to say Hamapil without Hashem’s name.

Speaking and Drinking After Hamapil: When Interruption Is Permitted

Albert’s concern about taking medication addresses an important halachic question. The Mishna Berurah (OC 239:4) states that one should not talk or eat after saying Birkat Hamapil unless facing an emergency. However, Hacham Ovadia takes a different approach. Since Hamapil functions as Birkat HaShevach, interruptions – while not ideal – do not invalidate the bracha. Hacham Ovadia demonstrates this by permitting reciting “Asher Yatzar” after using the bathroom,

even following Birkat Hamapil (Hazon Ovadia Brachot p. 511). The bracha’s validity does not depend on immediate sleep.

This permits common situations: calming a crying child, taking medication, or addressing genuine thirst. Though Birkat Hamapil should ideally be said right before sleep, necessary actions do not invalidate the bracha.

Sleep as Divine Service

Judaism transforms even basic physical needs into opportunities for spiritual elevation. The Gemara (Berachot 63a) derives from “In all your ways, know Him” (Mishlei 3:6) that every human activity can become Divine service when approached with proper kavana, intention. The Rambam (Hilchot De’ot 3:3) writes: “A person should intend that his body be healthy and strong to serve Hashem. Even sleep – if done to rest the body in order to serve Hashem – becomes an act of Divine service.”

This principle extends into practical halacha. Those engaged in pidyon shevuyim (redeeming captives) are exempt from sleeping in a sukkah, not only during the day but even at night, since better indoor sleep provides more strength and energy for this life-saving mission (Beit Yosef O.C. 640). Since their quality of sleep is paramount to the mitzvah, their sleep itself becomes part of their mitzvah engagement.

Finding Balance in Sleep

The Mishna Berurah (O.C. 238:2) teaches that sleep has no universal requirement – it varies by individual needs. However, he cautions against oversleeping, citing the Gemara (Sanhedrin 71b): “Sleep is bad for the righteous and bad for the world,” as excessive sleep can distance one from spiritual growth.

Yet, the Taz (E.H. 25:1) offers nuance on Tehillim 127:2: “It is in vain that you rise early and stay up late… for He gives His beloved sleep.” Both those who sleep less to maximize Torah learning and those who need more sleep for focused and effective learning are equally beloved to Hashem. The determining factor is intention.

Practical Guidance

Returning to Albert’s situation, his Birkat Hamapil remains fully valid whether or not he falls asleep immediately. He may take his blood pressure medication with water, and if he needs melatonin to help with his jet lag, he may drink it without concern. His intention to rest properly for tefilla aligns perfectly with the Rambam’s teaching about sleep as Divine service.

Sleep represents more than physical restoration – it’s a Divine gift that renews us after each day’s challenges. In Albert’s case, taking necessary medication to ensure good health and quality sleep for tomorrow’s tefilla becomes spiritual preparation.

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer and author on Medical Halacha. He heads the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. His latest book is Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome. To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com.

One Ride, A Lifetime of Blessings

Pnina Souid

The Mitzvah Man shared the following story with me:

One freezing cold winter day I passed by the Mirrer Yeshiva, and I saw a young man about 24 years old standing on the sidewalk, shivering. He appeared to be looking for someone.

I asked him if he needed a ride. I realized he might be suspicious of a stranger offering a ride so I pointed to my tefillin next to me in the car, so he knew I was a religious Jew. He asked where I was going. I answered, “Where are you going?” We should all keep in mind that when doing a hesed the emphasis should be on what you can do for the other person.

The young man told me that he was going to Nostrand and Avenue Z. “That’s right where I’m headed,” I responded. It wasn’t really where I was going, but I knew if I said that he would be taking me out of my way he would not have accepted the ride.

As he thawed out in the warmth of my car, I told him about the Mitzvah Man Organization. I explained that our volunteers give rides, help people who need appliances and furniture, arrange hospital visits, and many other types of hesed. I gave him my card. I thanked him for giving me the opportunity to do a mitzvah. I added that if he ever needed anything to please give me a call.

Two Years Later

I was driving on East 10 and Avenue R, and I saw a young man on a bicycle. He was shouting. It looked like he was following me. I was a little anxious when I realized that some crazy guy was following me, but as he got closer, I realized that what he was shouting sounded like, “Mitzvah, mitzvah!”

I pulled over and the man asked me, “Aren’t you the Mitzvah Man?” I nodded yes. He said, “I recognized your car. A couple of years ago you gave me a ride home when it was freezing cold. I’m sorry I lost your card. But now I need your help again please. I am getting married in two days. We have an apartment, but it is empty. We have no beds, no table or chairs, and no appliances.”

I said, “Not to worry! Let me call my dispatcher. She keeps a database of everyone who has items to donate.”

He heard my end of the call. “I have a young man here getting married in two days and needs his apartment completely furnished, including both furniture and appliances.” “Tell him not to worry,” the dispatcher answered. “I have everything he needs to furnish the apartment including the appliances.”

I gave the dispatcher the man’s number and address. She assured me that everything would be delivered in time. I gave a sigh of relief, thinking that not only will we be able to relieve his burden but in doing so will also give him a beautiful wedding gift.

Take Home Message

The young man and I were both amazed that “by chance” we met again, just when he needed more help.

The Mitzvah Man has a message to share. When you do a mitzvah from your heart you never know where it may lead, and what other mitzvot may follow. Doing hesed in a way that will help another person is acting in the service of Hashem. We never know how Hashem works but we always want to be His partner.

Positive Parenting – The Power of Staying Emotionally Calm

Tammy Sassoon

The Power of Staying Emotionally Calm

Parenting is one of the most rewarding and meaningful journeys a person can take, but it is also one of the most emotionally demanding. Children have a remarkable ability to test patience, push boundaries, and stir up feelings parents didn’t even realize they had. In these difficult moments, one of the greatest gifts you can give your child is not the perfect solution, but your emotional calm.

Remaining calm doesn’t mean ignoring problems or bottling up frustration. Rather, it means maintaining enough emotional steadiness to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively. When parents model calmness, they give their children an invaluable gift; emotional security, resilience, and the tools to regulate their own behavior.

Think of your own childhood. Do you remember how it felt when an adult around you lost control? That unsettled, unsafe feeling often lingers long after the incident itself. Now think about the times when an adult met your distress with patience and understanding. The calm presence made you feel seen, soothed, and safe. That is the lasting impact you can create for your own children.

Children are naturally attuned to their parents’ emotional states. When a parent reacts with anger, yelling, or visible frustration, a child not only feels unsettled but also learns that chaos is the normal response to stress. On the other hand, when a parent responds calmly, a child feels safe and learns that challenges can be managed without panic or aggression.

Calmness creates stability in the home. It reduces power struggles, shortens tantrums, and promotes cooperation. It also strengthens the bond between parent and child because the child experiences the parent as both safe and predictable. A calm parent communicates, “I am in control, even if things are hard.” That message alone can soothe a child’s fear, anger, or frustration.

Common Triggers for Parents

It helps to acknowledge your own unique triggers. Below are just a few, but there can be many more. These may include:

Tantrums in public – embarrassment often magnifies frustration. Backtalk or defiance – can feel disrespectful and invoke anger. Bedtime or morning routines – tiredness and rushing raise stress levels. Sibling conflicts – parents often feel torn about how to intervene. Personal stress – work, finances, or lack of sleep can deplete our patience.

Once you know what sets you off, you can prepare strategies for staying grounded.

The Ripple Effect

When parents practice calmness, children begin to internalize those same strategies. A child who sees their parent breathe through frustration may later try the same approach with a sibling. Calmness also decreases the overall stress level of the household, allowing for more joyful interactions and deeper connections.

Moreover, calm parenting strengthens a child’s resilience. Life always has its challenges, whether in friendships, academics, or work. A child who has witnessed calm responses to challenges will feel more capable of managing their own frustrations constructively.

Parenting with calm doesn’t erase difficulties, but it does change the atmosphere in which they unfold. When parents approach challenges with steadiness, they provide a secure emotional anchor for their children. That anchor helps kids feel safe, loved, and ready to handle life’s inevitable ups and downs.

And when you choose calm, even imperfectly, you give your children something priceless: the gift of safety, the gift of trust, and the quiet strength that tells them, “You are not alone. We can handle this together.”

Strategies for Staying Calm

Pause Before Responding: Even a few seconds of silence can prevent a reactive outburst. Take a slow breath, remind yourself of the bigger picture, and then speak.

Lower Your Voice: Yelling escalates conflict. Often, when parents lower their voice to a calm, steady tone, children instinctively quiet down to listen.

Separate the Behavior from the Child: Instead of thinking “My child is impossible,” reframe it as, “My child is struggling with this behavior right now.” This shift helps reduce personalizing and keeps responses constructive.

Set Clear Boundaries Calmly: Being calm doesn’t mean being permissive. A firm but gentle, “I won’t let you hit your brother” communicates authority without aggression.

Turn The Page: Home Is Where Your Story Continues…

Karen Behdar

October always feels like a bridge. The holidays wind down, the sukkah gets packed away for next year, and fall quietly settles into Brooklyn. The air feels sharper, the sidewalks gather crisp leaves, and the rhythm of life shifts back to routine. School schedules are in full swing, sweaters are pulled from storage, and we begin to notice the subtle but steady change, not just in the weather, but in ourselves.

Transitions

This is the season of transition. Just as the trees shed what they no longer need, families and individuals alike begin asking themselves what it might mean to step into something new. For some, that reflection comes quietly. A kitchen that once felt lively and warm now feels too small when everyone gathers. A commute that seemed manageable in September begins to feel like a weight by October. For others, the realization is sparked by joy, like hosting guests over the summer and dreaming about a dining room that could seat everyone comfortably, or imagining a backyard where children’s laughter might ring more freely.

Real estate has its own seasons, too. Fall is rarely about rushing. It’s about planning, envisioning, and wondering. It’s when people start planting the seeds for what could become a new beginning in the spring or summer. This is the moment when questions rise to the surface, often quietly at first:

Is this the right neighborhood for the stage of life I’m in?

● Do I want to stay rooted here, or is something pulling me elsewhere?

● What kind of space would truly feel like a home?

● What would it feel like to live in a place that doesn’t just fit my needs, but nurtures my dreams?

The beauty of this season is that it doesn’t demand answers right away. Just like the leaves don’t fall all at once, change unfolds gradually. Sometimes, the first step isn’t a decision. It’s simply giving yourself permission to wonder. To picture what life could look like if your surroundings matched the stage you’re in right now.

And there’s something grounding about October itself. It’s a reminder that change is part of the rhythm of life. We move through cycles of celebration and quiet, expansion and reflection, building and resting. The homes we live in are part of that cycle, too. They carry us through seasons, but they also invite us to ask when it’s time to turn the page.

Sprouting Thoughts

Maybe this is the month you realize the walls that once sheltered your young family now feel like they’re pressing in as your children grow taller. Maybe it’s the month you walk home from school pickup and think, “I’d love to live just a little closer.” Maybe it’s the month you look around your living room and think about the warmth of hosting Shabbat or holiday meals in a space that feels more open, more yours.

Whatever sparks the thought, October gives us space to pause and consider. To sit with the questions without rushing into answers. To look at our lives and ask, “What would the next chapter look like if I allowed myself to dream a little bigger?”

So as the leaves turn and the air shifts, let yourself reflect on more than just the season. Think about where your story is unfolding and whether it’s time to imagine a different backdrop for the chapters ahead.

Because home isn’t just where you live. It’s where your story continues…

Words of Rabbi Eli J. Mansour: Before You Judge…

The story of the Tower Babel, which we read this month, is – like many stories in the Book of Beresheet – very well known. We are all familiar with the people’s idea to build a tower to the heavens and challenge the Almighty, and with the way Gd disrupted their scheme by causing them to speak different languages and thus lose the ability to collaborate with one another.

There is one detail of the story, though, which does not receive much attention, but is well worth our consideration – particularly during the times we are living through, when the Jewish Nation finds itself at war and continually targeted by false, malicious accusations.

“Coming Down” to See

The Torah tells that Gd “came down to see the city and the tower that the people built” (11:5). Already Rashi notes the peculiarity of the description of Gd “coming down” to observe the events here on earth. It goes without saying that Gd does not need to go anywhere to see anything; He is keenly aware of all events that occur at all times at all places in all of existence even before they happen. Certainly, He had no need to descend to the earth to see the tower.

Rashi explains, citing the Midrash: “He did not need this [to ‘come down’], but He wanted to teach judges not to convict the defendant until they have seen and understood [the matter].”

Gd here taught by example not to pass judgment flippantly, before definitively determining what happened. He, of course, had firsthand knowledge of the tower – but He wanted to teach human judges not to reach a conclusion before they thoroughly investigate and study the case.

Similarly, the Torah later (18:21) tells that Gd “came down” to see the sinfulness of Sedom, and Rashi there references his comments regarding the Tower of Babel, explaining that Gd set an example by “coming down” to directly observe Sedom’s crimes before condemning it to annihilation.

To show how far this principle extends, let’s fast-forward to the Book of Devarim, where we find, startlingly enough, how even the greatest of all men may have been ever so slightly too quick to judge.

The People’s Cries

The context is the upsetting story of Kivrot Hata’avah, when, during Beneh Yisrael’s journey through the desert, they felt discontented, and demanded a richer “menu.” Dissatisfied with their daily ration of miraculous manna, the people expressed their desire for vegetables and meat.

The Torah tells: “Moshe heard the nation crying with their families…and Gd was exceedingly incensed, and it was evil in Moshe’s eyes” (Bamidbar 11:10).

Upon reading this verse, we are immediately struck by its unusual structure and syntax. Rather than simply stating that both Gd and Moshe were disturbed by the people’s complaints, the Torah says that Gd was angry, and then adds, separately, that the complaints upset Moshe, too.

If we examine this verse carefully, we might propose a surprising and novel reading. The Torah at this point does not tell us that Gd was angry at Beneh Yisrael for complaining. It says, “Vayihar af Hashem me’od” – that He was very angry. This anger was not necessarily directed at the people. We might suggest that – astonishingly enough – it was directed at Moshe.

Moshe? What did he do wrong? How was he to blame for what was happening?

We discover the answer by looking carefully at the first part of this verse: “Moshe heard the nation crying…” Moshe did not hear the people complaining – he heard them crying, and he assumed that they were crying because they wanted a more varied diet.

And Gd was “exceedingly incensed” at Moshe for jumping to this conclusion, for determining what the people were crying about before verifying this.

This is truly astonishing. Just before, Moshe heard the people complaining, and this was hardly the first time they complained. Even so, he was not justified in his assumption regarding the reason for their crying.

Moreover, this assumption was 100 percent correct. The people were, in fact, crying because they wanted a variety of food. And even so – Moshe was wrong to prematurely make this assumption.

This is how far the Torah goes in demanding that we reserve judgment, and avoid reaching unfounded conclusions about other people’s wrongdoing. Even when we have very good reason to assume the worst, and even if it actually turns out to be the worst – we are held accountable for making an assumption that has yet to be conclusively substantiated.

Erecting a “Fence” Around Judgmentalism

Our sages expressed for us this concept in the very first Mishnah of Pirkeh Avot, which cites three teachings of the Ansheh Kenesset Hagedolah, the Men of the Great Assembly at the beginning of the Second Temple era. The first two are: hevu metunim badin – be patient and thorough in judgment, when presiding over a trial; and asu seyag laTorah – “erect a fence around the Torah.”

This second teaching is commonly understood as a reference to the enactment of safeguards, instituting restrictions that the Torah itself did not command, as a “fence” keeping us away from possible violations of Torah law.

There may, however, be an additional interpretation of this instruction, “asu seyag laTorah” – that it pertains to the previous instruction, to be slow and patient when judging. The great sages of the Ansheh Kenesset Ha’gedolah teach us to erect a “fence” around the obligation to reserve judgment. Not only must we avoid reaching conclusions before seeing the evidence –

but even after we see what happened, even when we have concrete knowledge about the event, even then we should hesitate before judging.

Just as we saw in the story of Kivrot Hata’avah, we are expected to reserve judgment even when we have good reason to assume the worst about somebody. We are to recognize the inherent potential within every person, the spark of holiness embedded in each soul, and to trust in all people’s capacity for goodness. So much so that even when we think we have reason to assume somebody did something wrong – we must still consider the possibility that they didn’t, that things aren’t the way they seem, that there are mitigating factors, that the person really didn’t act as badly as it appears.

An amusing example is a story I heard about a certain yeshiva in Israel. It came to the administrators’ attention that the students were often using the disposable coffee cups for water, instead of the less expensive plastic cups. Yeshivas are always very cost-conscious and looking for ways to save money, and so the Rosh Yeshiva wrote a strongly-worded letter demanding that the hot cups be used only for hot beverages, and that students who use these cups for water are guilty of stealing from the yeshiva. This letter was hung up in the room where the students came for drinks.

Sometime later, a student was seen reading the sign, and then taking a coffee cup, filling it with water, and drinking. He was harshly reprimanded for this clear violation of the yeshiva’s new rule.

He explained that he was planning to have a cup of coffee, but he wanted some water first. Rather than take a plastic cup for his water, and then a hot cup for the coffee, he decided it would be better to use the same cup for both.

The people who saw what this boy did were convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that he violated the rule. They assumed – for good reason – that they caught him red-handed. But they were wrong.

And this is true of so many of the assumptions we make about other people. We are so sure we know exactly what they did and exactly why they did it, and we cast judgment. But the truth is we know so little. Even when we have firsthand knowledge, we know nothing about the background to the incident, or about the background of the person who committed the act. There is so much about people that we don’t know – how can we judge based on the minuscule amount that we do know?

Let’s Not Do Our Enemies’ Job

This is one of the important areas for us to focus on during the extraordinary times we’re living in, when irrational Jew-hatred has reached levels that we had not before seen in our lifetime.

A ubiquitous feature of this alarming trend is the knee-jerk accusations against us. The moment that Hamas – a terror organization that preaches and glorifies murder, violence, torture and mayhem – puts out a statement alleging some Israeli crime, news outlets across the globe accept it and run banner headlines. The hysterical reports of widespread starvation in Gaza because of Israel’s war effort have largely been proven false. Early in the war, Hamas accused Israel of bombing a Gaza hospital, killing hundreds of patients – when in fact it was a misfired Palestinian rocket that struck the hospital’s parking lot, causing a small

number of casualties. Every Palestinian action against Israel is justified as self-defense, and every Israeli counterterrorism measure is condemned as aggression.

Our enemies are doing a “fine” job on their own jumping to conclusions, rushing to criticize and condemn, and thinking the worst about us. Our response to this trend must include a commitment to do just the opposite – to avoid judgment of our fellow Jews, to look favorably upon them, to think the best instead of the worst, to admire their goodness instead of searching for what’s wrong. Our foes across the world are already doing what they can to find fault in the Jewish Nation. We need to go to the opposite extreme, as far as we possibly can – focusing our attention on all that is good in other Jews, and refraining from judging and condemning.

The more we strive to judge our fellow Jews favorably, the more we will be judged favorably from Above, and earn the same love and affection from Hashem that we extend to others.