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Living Emunah – The Emunah of Spending

Rabbi David Ashear

How tight or free-spending should a person be with his money, according to the principles of emunah and bitachon? Rabbi Lugassi quoted the Menoras HaMaor, who writes that a person should be happy with whatever Hashem has given him and rely on Hashem to send parnassah for his basic necessities.

One should never consider himself a pauper to the extent that he has to skimp on staples such as food and clothing. A person’s family has to look presentable and be nourished properly. With regard to extras and luxuries, there is no guarantee that Hashem will provide for them. We don’t know if they’re good for us, and therefore, if a person doesn’t have sufficient money, he should restrain himself from spending on these items. But for the basics, not only shouldn’t we hold back, we should spend happily and freely. Even if at the moment a person doesn’t have enough money to buy what he needs, he should borrow and trust that Hashem will ultimately provide for him to able to pay his debts.

Being able to spend money happily requires hizuk, like any other middah. A person should not be afraid to spend. Money is to be used. If we have it, and there’s a need, we should spend it. We shouldn’t complain or portray ourselves, even to our wives and children, as needy. A child has to feel that his parents can provide, and a wife should feel the same regarding her husband.

If a man is struggling in business, he should cut down on the extras, and his wife needs to understand that she needs to do the same. But as for the basic necessities, he always has to be the provider, even if he has to borrow.

The Gemara says (Bava Batra 15b) that Iyov was a vatran, a forgoing person, with regard to money. Because he was easygoing, he saw so much blessing in monetary matters. The amount we are given is determined only by Hashem, but our attitude is entirely up to us. A person can either feel deprived and bitter, or he can feel that he has what he needs, knowing that Hashem is always there to provide more.

In Emunah with Love and Chicken Soup, the biography of Rebbetzin Henny Machlis, author Sara Yoheved Rigler describes how the Rebbetzin was a shining example of the proper attitude in this area. She and her husband had a very large family, yet they were renowned for their hospitality, hosting over 100 guests at each Shabbat meal! Although they were not people of means, they always had enough to provide. The Rebbetzin used to say, “I have all the money; I have all the time; I have all the space.” She would never become overwhelmed by the great expense or preparation necessary to provide for all the guests, knowing that   she had Hashem on her side. She lived for the moment, and relied on Hashem to help her for the future.

On many occasions, Friday morning would come around, and they didn’t have enough money to buy food for Shabbat. But the Rebbetzin never worried. Once, they still didn’t have enough money at 12:30pm, and they hadn’t even begun to shop. Their credit cards were maxed out, and the stores were beginning to close, but the Rebbetzin said, “Why should we spend our whole Friday worrying how we’re going to make Shabbat?” Somehow, help always came. Even if they had to borrow, it wasn’t a problem.

Our attitude is up to us. We have a Father with unlimited funds. He is the One Who brought us into the world. He is our Provider, and He wants us to feel at ease, even when the money is not pouring in. If we have this attitude, we’ll have more peace in the home, and that brings berachah. When it comes to extras we should be very careful how we spend, but we should always spend freely on the necessities.

May our positive attitude open up the gates of blessing for Hashem to shower us with more!

The Rise of Weight Loss Medications: What You Need to Know

Jenna Ashkenazie

More and more people are using medications to help them to lose weight. While weight loss medications have been around for decades, there has been a rise in popularity, fueled by discussion of the topic via social media in the past few years.

Ozempic is one of the most well-known weight loss medications today, although it was never actually meant to be used for weight loss. The medication was created to help Type 2-Diabetes patients, and has FDA approval for treatment of diabetes. It is not approved by the FDA for promoting weight loss. Doctors began to notice that a very common side effect of the Ozempic shot is weight loss, and clinical trials in 2021 showed weight loss results with non-diabetic patients. It was at that time that Wegovy, another anti-diabetes medication, became FDA approved for promoting weight loss.

How These Medicines Work

Medicines like Ozempic and Wegovy are GLP-1 agonists are a class of medications that mimic the actions of the natural hormone glucagon-like peptide-1 (GLP-1). This hormone help regulate blood sugar, manage appetite, and helps digestion. This is why these medicines were originally created to help diabetics. The difference between the two medications, however, has to do with the doses. While both medicines contain the same active ingredient, semaglutide, Wegovy’s contains a higher dose, which is why it is FDA approved for weight loss and Ozempic isnot. An article in the online publication UC Davis Health weighs in on the topic “Can weight loss medications really help you lose weight?” It states, “Prescription weight loss medications work in one or more of the following ways: decrease appetite, increase feelings of fullness, interfere with fat absorption, and target cravings.”

Community Highlights – Sara Schenirer Charts New Territory in Healthcare Education

With growing demand from students eager to enter healthcare fields, Sara Schenirer proudly announces the launch of a new accelerated Health Science degree track for men and women, to complement its already highly successful Pre-Med Track. The new program begins this fall, and multiple cohorts have already filled due to high demand. Both tracks are offered in partnership with the University of Mount Saint Vincent and Saint Peter’s University.

“Our existing Pre-Med track is ideal for students seeking to apply to medical, dental, or PA school,” explained Rabbi Elazar Meisels, President of Sara Schenirer. “But students who wish to pursue a career in nursing and similar fields will be better served by the Health Science track, which is quicker and even more affordable.”

Which track is right for you?

Pre-Med Track (16 months): Designed for students pursuing admission to medical school, dental school, PA school, or pharmacy programs, this track includes the advanced science prerequisites and lab courses required for those programs.

Health Science Track (11 months): Ideal for students planning to apply to nursing school and similar allied health fields. Fast, affordable, and rigorous, it includes the core science prerequisites needed for those pathways.

Students in both tracks earn a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology, with a concentration in Pre-Med or Health Science, positioning them to apply for graduate programs in a wide range of medical fields. Students may also transfer in dual credit and seminary credits to complete their degree even faster. Both programs offer access to exceptional professors and a highly supportive learning environment.

Although Sara Schenirer does not offer a nursing degree directly, graduates of the Health Science Track benefit from an exclusive agreement with the University of Mount Saint Vincent, which offers a Shomer Shabbat Nursing Program specially tailored for Sara Schenirer students.
“We’ve seen a tremendous demand for clear, Torah-aligned pathways into the healthcare field,” said Mrs. Batsheva Shonek, Director of Sara Schenirer. “These new tracks allow our students to pursue meaningful, respected careers in medicine or allied health – without compromising their values, schedule, or support system.”

Interested in learning more?

Call to speak with one of our trusted student advisors. They’ll give you all the information you need to make a confident decision. To reach the women’s program advisor, call Mrs. Bonni Herman at (718) 633-8557 ext. 37 or email information@sarasch.com. To reach the men’s program advisor, call R’ Reuven Pelberg at (718) 633-8557 ext. 50 or email rpelberg@sarasch.com.

The deadline to apply is July 30th, 2025 so act fast if you’d like to join for Fall Semester.

Kosher with Confidence: Why Supervision Is Essential

Victor Cohen

The observance of kashrut is a cornerstone of Jewish life, among the most important means by which we set ourselves apart from the rest of the world. We do not eat in the same restaurants as others, we do not buy the same foods as others, and we handle our dishes much differently.

Thankfully, our generation is blessed with numerous highly-competent organizations that we can trust to certify products and establishments as kosher. These include household names such as the Orthodox Union (OU), Star-K, and the Jersey Shore Orthodox Rabbinate (JSOR). These organizations, among others, allow us to purchase food and eat at restaurants confidently, knowing that the food we consume was prepared in compliance with kashrut laws.

Unfortunately, not everyoneunderstands the “ins and outs” of how certification works, and there are those who are not aware its necessity for certain foods or establishments. They may say, “I just eat cheese,” or “I just eat fish,” or “I just get salad.” They may further the question the purpose of certification if “it’s all kosher ingredients.”

The truth is that there is much more to kashrut than just the “kosher ingredients.” People need to realize that even if all the ingredients are 100 percent kosher, the product could still be halachically forbidden for consumption.

To gain a clearer understanding of the issues at hand, and to receive some practical guidelines for kosher consumers, I had the honor of interviewing Rabbi Hayim Asher Arking, Administrator of JSOR. He patiently explainedfor us in general terms how kashrut works, where potential misunderstandings may arise, and what the real issues at play are.

The Meaning of “Certified Kosher”

“Certification” is a broad term. It can apply to foods which must be prepared in a certain manner, to foods that can easily be substituted with a non-kosher alternative, or to the status of the utensils used in production.

Some foods or drinks are always considered kosher. Water, for instance, is always kosher,even water with electrolytes. The same goes for unflavored coffee, plain raw rice, flour, sugar, and fruits which are not prone to infestation. (It should be noted that Israeli fruits and vegetables do require supervision). Some foods change kashrut status depending on the circumstances, such as cooked rice, artichoke hearts which are prone to infestation, and others. There are also foods which always require certification, no matter what the ingredient panel states, because they must be prepared according to certain conditions. Rabbi Arking gave six examples of food categories that require certification despite their kosher ingredients:

  1. All cheeses
  2. All cooked foods (because of issues with bishul akum– products cooked by a gentile, the use of non-kosher utensils, and potentially problematic ingredients)
  3. Wine, brandy, cognac
  4. Fish
  5. Meat/Poultry
  6. Vegetables

Milk vs. Cheese

Many people are unaware of the important distinction between milk and cheese in regard to modern-day kashrut.Rabbi Moshe Feinstein ruled that here in the United States, commercially-produced milk does not require certification, due to the stringent regulatory restrictions of the FDA,whichall but guarantee that the milk we purchase came from a cow, and not a non-kosher species. Outside the USA, every location requires evaluation. Many hold to a higher standard and use onlyhalav Yisrael – which means milk which was produced under supervision, rather than being presumed to be permissible.

Cheese, however, is treated far more stringently, as the sages forbade consuming gevinat akum – cheese produced by a gentile. Thus, pizza or pasta with cheese from a non-certified restaurant is prohibited. Bringing one’s own cheese to a non-kosher restaurant is not a solution, as numerous halachic issues remain, such as the status of the utensils, gentiles preparing the food, added ingredients, and others.

Wine

The production of wine requires proper supervision throughout the entire process, and secure sealings of all barrels while aging. When you go to a liquor store and see a wine bottle bearing kosher certification, that means that a kashrut organization has guaranteed it reaches your hands under kosher conditions, by assuring that the numerous halachot relevant to wine were upheld.  Consumers must be advised that if the label says “not mevushal,” then the wine becomes prohibited if it is handled by a gentile at any point after the seal was open.

Meat

Generally, even those who are less scrupulous in their kashrut observance recognize the need for kosher certification for meat. Most misunderstandings arise when it comes to fish, dairy products, and vegetables, which is why JSOR has made a concerted effort over the last several years to facilitate many kosher dairy restaurants throughout the Deal area, in order to promote kashrut observance.

Nevertheless, it is worthwhile to review the basic principles relevant to the kosher status of meat.

You are in the butchery, and in front of you are two steaks: Steak A and Steak B. Steak A is certified, and Steak B is not. What makes A kosher and not B?

The following guidelines must be adhered to for meat to be kosher:

  1. The meat must originate from a kosher species, such as a cow or sheep. Without valid certification, there is no guarantee that the meat was taken from an animal whose meat is permitted by the Torah for consumption.
  1. The animal must be slaughtered properly by a trained, certified shohet (“slaughterer”). The animal cannot be stunned through the slaughter period, and a certain kind of knife must be used.
  2. After slaughtering, the meat must be salted, certain veins and fats must be removed, and it must be handled properly.

Furthermore, meat in a non-certified restaurant may not be eaten even if it is otherwise kosher, because halachah forbids eating meat that was “concealed from view,” and not properly guarded.  And, the law of bishul akum forbids eating even inherently kosher food if it was cooked by a gentile. Even utensils used by a gentile for cooking become forbidden, such that the food cooked in them by a Jew thereafter may not be eaten.

Thus, when a restaurant is certified kosher, this means that the kashrut agency ascertained that all the ingredients used by the restaurant are kosher, and all the food served in the restaurant is prepared according to halachic requirements.

Fish is…Fishy

Many people mistakenly assume that since fish has far fewer kashrut restrictions than meat, it does not require supervision.  But this is not true.Alarmingly, many studies have found that“fish fraud” across the United States is at well over 30 percent, perhaps higher. It is incredibly easy to replace one fish with another – and this happens in stores, restaurants, and other establishments.

This means that if we buy fish without kosher supervision, we cannot know whether or not it originates from a permissible species. And when ordering fish in a non-certified restaurant, one also encounters the problem of bishul akum. We must emphasize that there are no halachic “loopholes” that can permit eating fish that does not have kosher supervision, and it must therefore be treated just as stringently as meat.

Vegetables

Vegetables are, in many ways, the most clear-cut category, though vegetables which are prone to infestation need to be checked before consumption. The checking is what makesthe produce kosher – and so it must be treated as non-kosher before it is inspected. The vegetables cannot be presumed to be checked, and thus salads in non-kosher restaurants are prohibited. Like with other foods, vegetables require certain procedures to become kosher, and unless these procedures are followed, they may not be eaten.

Needless to say, the laws of kashrut are intricate and complex, and in fact, some rabbis devote many years to the full-time study of these halachot. Additionally,the certification process is nuanced and complicated, with different agencies implementing different policies. Hopefully, though, this article offered the reader an informative and practical overview of how certification works, why it is needed, and how it applies to different food groups. If you have any specific questions about the status of a certain food, or of the validity of a particular agency’s certification, please direct them to your local rabbi.Baruch Hashem,over the past 50 years, our community has made significant strides in the area of kashrut. While some issues occasionally arise, new kosher restaurants continue to open, and people have become more aware of the need for supervision. Much of this is thanks to the work of the rabbinical, executive and operational teams at JSOR, who continue to facilitate the availability of kosher restaurants and products, which will positively impact halachic observance generally throughout our community.

M&S Softball 2025: Bigger. Bolder. Built for the Die-Hards

Sam Sutton

Summer in Deal means one thing: M&S Softball is back, and the 2025 season promises to be its most competitive, content-rich, and exciting chapter yet.

Every roster in the league is packed with ultimate die-hards. This isn’t casual softball. This is M&S – a summer-long battle between competitors who live for the moment and play for legacy.

Lights, Camera, Legacy: M&S Media Coverage

What truly elevates M&S Softball is its unmatched media presence.

Every game is livestreamed – and it’s not just about watching; it’s about being immersed. Co-commissioner Max Sutton leads the live play-by-play with a revolving cast of colorful commentators, bringing sharp insight, unpredictable energy, and off-the-cuff chemistry. Max is as unpredictable as it gets – and that’s what makes the broadcasts unforgettable.

After the final out, the production keeps rolling. High-definition highlight packages drop after every game – edited tight, loaded with emotion, and narrated by the unmistakable cadence of co-commissioner Sam I Am. His energetic professionalism, sharp wit, and ability to turn routine plays into unforgettable moments has made his voice as much a part of the M&S experience as the game itself. Whether it’s a walk-off bomb or a clutch defensive stand, Sam brings it to life like only he can. It’s more than a recap – it’s a retelling. A rewatchable. A moment in motion.

All content lives on the league’s growing YouTube channel: youtube.com/@samiampro.

And for real-time reaction and unfiltered banter? That’s where M&S Smack Talk thrives – a league-wide WhatsApp chat where highlights are shared, opinions are formed, and no moment goes unnoticed.

Carpool Chronicles: Built for the Whole Community

As summer heats up and M&S Softball takes center stage, Carpool Chronicles with Hank continues to be the most talked-about show in community sports media.

Hank Dweck is the cog of the show – the one driving the analysis, the controversy, and the conversation. His takes are sharp, his rankings are bold, and his delivery keeps players locked in and fans talking.

From Day 1, Carpool Chronicles was never just about M&S. It was designed to spotlight all major community leagues – from softball to basketball and everything in between – and it has quickly become the go-to source for authentic commentary, accountability, and banter. While Hank delivers the insight, Sam I Am hosts the ride, teeing up topics, pressing buttons, and guiding the show with the pacing and polish that’s made it one of the most-watched pieces of content in the community. Together, they’ve built something bigger than a recap – they’ve created a voice for the players, the fans, and the culture.

Seven Teams. One M&S Cup. All-In.

The M&S Cup isn’t just a trophy – it’s a piece of league history. Every champion since 2008 is etched into its base. And every player in 2025 wants to be next. Meet the captains and their squads:

Sephardic Bananas – Captain: Edmund Beyda

King Salomon: Part Deux– Captain: Michael “Sabon” Salomon

Stayin’ Alive – Captain: Michael “Melech” Solomon

The Thundering Hooves– Captain: Gabe Abadi

The Long Horns– Captain: Max Yedid

Vandelay Industries– Captain: Sammy Seruya

Kaboom!– Captain: Uri Adler

Each team was drafted with purpose – a mix of veterans, breakout stars, and clutch performers – all with one mission: Lift the Cup!

The full 2025 M&S schedule is now available at www.MandSbaseball.com.

Medical Halacha – Vitamins on Shabbat

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas

“Rabbi, I was wondering about something regarding Shabbat,” Sammy began. “I’m generally healthy, but I take vitamins regularly to help me feel strong. I’m unsure if the rules about taking medication on Shabbat apply to vitamins as well. Could you clarify this for me?”

Maachal Breiim for Mild Ailments

The Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 328:37) establishes that one may consume maachal breiim – regular foods and beverages that healthy individuals consume – even if they provide medicinal benefits. For example, someone with a mild cold, who is generally prohibited from taking medication on Shabbat due to the rabbinic decree of gezerat shehikat samemanim (the prohibition of grinding herbs to prepare medicine), is permitted to drink chicken soup or lemon tea with honey for relief, as these are considered regular foods and drinks consumed by healthy individuals. Gezerat shehikat samemanim does not apply to everyday foods. Based on this principle, Hacham Ovadia Yosef, zt”l, permits consuming soda water for heartburn relief on Shabbat (Halichot Olam Vol. 4, p. 205) as soda water is a regular, commonly consumed, beverage.

Maachal She’eino Breiim for Mild Ailments

Conversely, maachal she’eino breiim – foods not typically consumed by healthy individuals – should not be taken for medicinal purposes by someone with a mild ailment, due to the concern of gezerat shehikat samemanim (O.C. 328:37). For instance, homemade herbal remedies using herbs not commonly eaten are prohibited on Shabbat for minor illnesses. However, this restriction does not apply to a choleh she’ein bo sakana (a non-critically ill person), who is permitted to take necessary medication on Shabbat.

Maachal She’eino Breiim for Healthy Individuals

Regarding healthy individuals, the Beit Yosef (ibid) explains that the issue of eating maachal she’eino breiim on Shabbat does not apply to them,and there is noconcern of gezerat shehikat samemanim  as they are not sick. Therefore, a healthy person may consume natural herbal remedies (maachal she’eino breiim) even to strengthen their health. The Magen Avraham (328:43), however, disagrees, permitting such foods only when consumed for hunger or thirst, not solely for health enhancement. Hacham Ovadia Yosef (Chazon Ovadia, Shabbat, Vol. 3, p. 363) explains that those following the Shulchan Aruch may consume maachal she’eino breiim to maintain or improve their health.

Vitamins on Shabbat

In this context, Hacham Ovadia Yosef explicitly permits healthy individuals to take vitamins on Shabbat (ibid), even for the purpose of maintaining good health (Halichot Olam, Vol. 4, p. 207). This is because a healthy person is allowed to consume maachal she’eino breiim.Bottom of Form It’s important to note that those who follow the opinion of the Magen Avraham might not permit taking vitamins on Shabbat, as they are typically not consumed to satisfy hunger. However, Hacham Ben Zion Abba Shaul (Ohr Lezion 2:36:10) suggests a potential leniency even according to the Magen Avraham’s view, arguing that vitamins could be classified as maachal breiim due to their common consumption by healthy individuals.

Conclusion

In response to Sammy’s question, it is permitted for a healthy person to take vitamins on Shabbat. This is because the issue of eating maachal she’eino breiim on Shabbat does not extend to healthy individuals. This aligns with the ruling of Hacham Ovadia Yosef, who permits healthy individuals taking vitamins on Shabbat even for health reasons. While some authorities, like the Magen Avraham, might hold a more restrictive view, the prevailing Sephardic approach, following the Shulchan Aruch and the rulings of Hacham Ovadia Yosef, considers it acceptable for  healthy individuals to take vitamins on Shabbat. Furthermore, the suggestion of Hacham Ben Zion Abba Shaul offers a potential basis for leniency even within other halachic perspectives, given the common use of vitamins by healthy people. Therefore, according to the Sephardic tradition, Sammy would be allowed to take his vitamins on Shabbat.

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer and author on Medical Halacha. He heads the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. His latest book is “Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome.” To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com.

Empowering Our Community Through Meaningful Careers

In the heart of our vibrant and close-knit community, we hold fast to traditions that define us: strong family values, a deep sense of responsibility, and a commitment to both spiritual and personal success. These values have helped our community flourish across generations, blending the sacred and the practical with remarkable grace.

As our community continues to grow, so too does the need for purposeful careers – roles that not only support our families but also align with our beliefs, character, and long-term vision. For those who prioritize a balanced life, this harmony is essential: we seek integrity in our work, flexibility in our lives, and the ability to positively impact those around us.

A Career with Purpose and Flexibility

At New York Life, we understand the unique rhythm of a values-driven lifestyle. Personal commitments holidays, and time with family aren’t just “benefits” to accommodate – they are priorities to be honored. That’s why we offer career opportunities that provide the flexibility to uphold your commitments while building a future rooted in financial security and community leadership.

A career as a financial professional isn’t simply about numbers. It’s about building relationships, guiding families through important financial decisions, and becoming a trusted presence in your circle. Many of our top-performing professionals are individuals who have successfully balanced familyand professional achievement.

Why This Career Resonates with Our Values

  • Family-Oriented Work: You’ll be helping families safeguard their futures – whether it’s through life insurance, retirement planning, or intergenerational wealth transfer.
  • Community-Centered: Your clients are often people you already know and care about. Your integrity and understanding of their needs become key assets.
  • Entrepreneurial Spirit: With the freedom to build your own practice, you’re not tied to the conventional 9–5. You control your schedule, your goals, and your impact.
  • Legacy Building: Just as we pass down traditions and values, we also pass down financial stability and ethical business conduct. This is a career that honors both.

Support from a Community-Focused Team

We are actively seeking candidates who are passionate about making a difference. As a Managing Partner at New York Life Brooklyn General Office, I understand the importance of balancing personal values with professional growth. I work personally with new professionals to provide mentorship, understanding, and long-term career development.

Whether you’re exploring a new path or looking for a career that aligns with your values, I invite you to consider how a role at New York Life can empower you and those around you. Let’s build something meaningful together – something that honors our past and secures our future. For more information, please contact Managing Partner, David Hoory, dhoory@newyorklife.com, (718) 307-3400.For more information about financial professional income and benefits, please visit www.newyorklife.com.New York Life is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

Sailing Relationships with R’ Ali – July 2025

QUESTION:

Dear Rabbi Ali,

I would say that this has been an issue in my marriage for as long as I could remember.  At least two to three times a week we argue about money. My wife likes spending lavishly, many times beyond our means, whereas, I like to live a more conservative lifestyle and to save money. She says that I am cheap, but I don’t think so. What does one do when two people just have different approaches to money? Is there any way to deal with this without fighting?

R’ Ali’s Response:

I will address your specific questions, but I’d like to mention a few things that people need to hear on this topic. The peer pressure of the Jewish community can be very intense. Trying to keep up with our friends and neighbors is no easy task. It’s important to understand that some people care very much about keeping up with others and some don’t care so much. If your spouse feels this pressure, it won’t help to debate it. Rather, accept it for what it is and deal with it. This is not to say that your spouse is correct. That is a completely different topic. On the other hand, some people don’t care much about what others are doing and live within their means. It’s important to acknowledge that as a sign of good character and be grateful for that. Calling your spouse “cheap” for not wanting to spend recklessly is wrong and insensitive. The spouse who is calling the other one “cheap” may be looking at a special and noble person and may not even recognize it.

Another important point that I believe all wives must hear, is that your husband cannot “make money.” All he can do is his ownhishtadlut. He works hard because that is what Hashem wants him to do. However,Hashem is the One who ultimately decides how much money he will have. I say this because many women are resentful that their husbands are not “making it” like their friends or family are. If the husband is working hard, there’s not much more that he can do. Complaining to him about his lack of wealth makes him feel horrible, worthless, and possibly makes him feel like a failure. 

Getting back to your question. You specifically asked, “What does one do when two people have different approaches?” I have seen many couples with many differences who seem to work their differences out just fine. However, I see other couples with minimal differences who struggle tremendously. It’s not about the differences, rather how you deal with them. If you have a good relationship, respect each other, and communicate nicely, most things will not become major issues. I don’t know the details about your relationship, but money is not usually an issue, even with different approaches, when the relationship is good. This is not to say that you don’t have a good relationship, I’m just giving you food for thought. Maybe you two need to work on communication, not money philosophies.

You mention that your wife keeps spending beyond your means. I’m not sure how you addressed this in the past but it obviously is not working. I have two ideas on how to deal with this specific problem. I call this a problem for obvious reasons. It seems like your wife spends money that you simply don’t have. If you had the money, that would be an entirely different question. The first idea would be to communicate to her in a different way. Until now you probably just argued with her. I have mentioned this approach in the past but it’s worth repeating. Approach your wife when there is no issue at hand. Make sure she and you are both relaxed. Tell her how you’d love to buy her everything that she wants (and mean it). However, we really need to stick to this budget for now. Hopefully, one day we will be able to spend much more. With this approach, it’s not about pointing the finger at “her spending habits,” it’s about the reality.

If this doesn’t work and she says that she needs more money, you should follow up with the next step. You should calculate the exact amount of your monthly income. Then, tell her this is how much I make and this is how much we can spend. Please understand that we cannot go over this budget for now. There are other ideas regarding setting boundaries, but I believe that anything drastic should be spoken over with a professional or a rabbi. I don’t see why you cannot sit down with your wife and a rabbi and propose the question to him. 

Wishing you much success, and, of course, if you pray to Hashem for assistance and clarity then you’re sure to have a wonderful relationship.

Historic Community Triumph: Sam Sutton Wins Election for NY State Senate Seat and Hits the Ground Running

ByEddie Esses and Sari Setton

On the evening of May 20, nervous anticipation quickly turned into excited euphoria… that we had finally done it. That WE, as a community, had achieved something monumental. 

In a historic moment for the Sephardic Jewish Community, Sam Sutton was elected to lead the 22nd New York State Senate District with a commanding 67-32% margin – making him the first Sephardic Jew ever elected to the NY State Senate. This was much more than just a victory for Sam; it was a transformative milestone for our community, which has steadily grown in strength, unity, and civic engagement.

This victory was reached, thanks in large part to our community. Special elections in non-presidential years often see minimal voter participation, but the Sephardic Community turned out in force. Building on the momentum of Joey Saban’s groundbreaking campaign for New York State Assembly just one year ago, we once again demonstrated that we are organized, motivated, and ready to be taken seriously by elected officials at every level. Borough Park, Midwood, and Flatbush voters also came out strong for Sam by a wide margin, contributing to a diverse and powerful coalition.

The election night celebration reflected the joy and meaning of this historic achievement. Sam gathered with close friends, campaign team members, and a host of dignitaries and elected officials. Former Governor Andrew Cuomo, Manhattan Borough President Mark Levine, and many NYC Council Members offered heartfelt remarks, reflecting on their past work with Sam and highlighting his long standing reputation as a thoughtful, effective, and principled leader. Ronnie Tawil, Sam’s fellow co-founder of the Sephardic Community Federation, gave a moving tribute, speaking of Sam’s unwavering devotion to the community and his decades of quiet yet impactful leadership. 

In his remarks that evening, Sam made sure to thank everyone who made the victory possible – but he gave special thanks to his wife, Nancy, a community leader in her own right. Sam acknowledged how much of his communal involvement was inspired and shaped by Nancy’s tireless work, and how grateful he is for her support, wisdom, and example.

Sam’s leadership has deep roots. A lifelong community leader, he has spent decades shaping key community institutions. He served over 30 years at SBH, including five as president, helping it grow into a comprehensive social service powerhouse. He co-founded and still chairs Teach NYS, which secured a $330 per-child education tax credit and opened the door for yeshivot to receive Title I services from culturally appropriate third-party providers. As a founding board member of the SAFE Foundation, a trustee at NYU Langone Hospital, and a former CUNY Board of Trustees member, Sam has spent his life using institutional roles to deliver tangible results for our community.

Behind the scenes, the campaign ran on passion, dedication, and a clear vision. Campaign manager Joey Saban, whose own run for office catalyzed a wave of civic engagement in the community last year, worked nonstop for months to line everything up for a potential campaign. Once launched, he ensured every detail of the campaign strategy was executed with heart and precision. That same energy carried through to Election Day, where Sephardic Community voters sent a clear and powerful message: we are no longer on the sidelines—we are shaping the future.

Only one week after the election, Sam took office in a special ceremony on the floor of the State Senate. Alongside his wife Nancy and his entire family, Sam was sworn into office using the Aleppo Codex, showcasing just how monumental a feat was achieved. Sam was recognized later that day during his first legislative session with a round of applause by the entire chamber. 

True to character, Sam wasn’t looking to spend time basking in his victory. He was eager to get to work.  With just two weeks remaining before the end of the legislative session, Sam  introduced four of his own bills and passed three of them (!)  – that’s more than many legislators pass in their full terms. One bill prevents the issuing of sanitation tickets to those who put out their garbage on Friday  as opposed to during Shabbat. Another bill supports funding for treatment for those struggling with infertility. In addition to passing multiple bills at a record pace, Sam also secured significant funding for multiple community organizations. 

For our community, this endeavor was much more than an election – it was a moment of long-overdue recognition. The Sephardic community has shown that it is cohesive, active, and ready to build lasting influence with government. With Sam Sutton in the State Senate, our voice is finally where it belongs: at the table.

Once Upon A Thyme – Caramelized Pear Salad with Red Wine Vinaigrette

AdinaYaakov

This dazzling appetizer features sweet caramelized pears, crunchy candied nuts, and a tangy red wine vinaigrette – all served in crispy edible tortilla bowls. Can’t find pomegranate seeds? Dried cranberries can work instead! Want to serve this salad simpler, family-style? Skip the tortilla bowls and layer ingredients in a large serving bowl.

Ingredients

Edible Bowls:

8 flour tortillas

Cooking spray

Oven-safe bowls

Salad:

1 (10 oz) bag romaine lettuce

1 cup candied walnuts

1 cup pomegranate seeds

1 cup celery, thinly sliced

4 Bartlett or D ’Anjou pears, sliced ¼-inch thick

¼ cup lemon juice

¼ cup brown sugar

Red Wine Vinaigrette:

Reserved juice from baked pears

¼ cup olive oil

2 tbsp red wine vinegar

2 tbsp honey

2 tbsp Dijon mustard

2 garlic cloves, minced

½ tsp salt

¼ tsp black pepper

Instructions:

1. Caramelize the Pears

Preheat oven to 300 degrees Fahrenheit.

Wash and slice pears into ¼-inch slices. Toss with lemon juice. Spread slices on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Sprinkle it with brown sugar. Bake for 20 minutes, then carefully drain and reserve the juice for the dressing.

Return pears to the oven and bake for an additional 15 minutes. Let cool.

2. Make the Dressing

In a jar, combine the reserved pear juice, olive oil, red wine vinegar, honey, Dijon mustard, garlic, salt, and pepper. Shake well to emulsify. Refrigerate until ready to serve.

3. Prepare Edible Tortilla Bowls

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.

Lightly spray oven-safe bowls with cooking spray.

Press a tortilla into each bowl, molding to shape.

Bake for 13–14 minutes until lightly golden and crisp. Let cool and remove from bowls.

Store in an airtight container for up to 2 days.

4. Assemble the Salad

Fill each tortilla bowl with a layer of romaine lettuce.

Top with caramelized pears, celery, candied nuts, and pomegranate seeds (or cranberries).

Serve the dressing in small cups or shot glasses on the side to prevent sogginess.

Serves 8

Recipe, photo, and styling by Adina Yaakov, Registered Dietitian Nutritionist.

Interested in optimizing these recipes for your specific health needs? Book a professional nutrition and dietetics consultation with Adina- sessions are available in person or via Zoom, and we accept many insurance plans.

https://provider.faynutrition.com/book/adina-yaakov/5d9a0a

For more recipes, visit her website www.OnceUponAThyme

Questions or Comments? Have a request or idea for future recipes? Want to share a photo of a recipe you’ve made from this recipe column? Email us at info@onceuponathyme.co