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Ask Jido – July 2025

Dear Jido,

My husband has been thinking about using Ozempic to lose weight, and I’m feeling conflicted. On one hand, I want to be supportive of his journey to get healthier, but on the other hand, I’m worried about him taking a medication for something that could be addressed with lifestyle changes that includes regular exercise and eating better. I fear that this is a shortcut that won’t last and can lead to additional health problems in the future. How can I express my concerns in a constructive way without making him feel unsupported?

Signed,

A Worried Wife

Dear Worried,     

Right up front, let me say that I am a medicine minimalist. I believe that Hashem has created the body with an amazing ability to protect and repair itself.  Certainly there are traumatic conditions that must be treated with outside intervention or there might be inborn genetic tendencies that need to be regulated. Obesity might be one of them. 

Overeating is not. 

If your husband is looking for an easy way to lose weight rather than by curbing his appetite, then certainly Ozempic is the answer. But, although Ozempic is FDA approved (based on results of clinical trials in 33 countries), there can be serious side effects (PLEASE – check out their website!) As we’ve seen with Covid treatments, many other modern “cures” have had serious consequences, includinguse of this drug, chas v’shalom

If he has a family history of being overweight due to a thyroid condition or other, I would certainly not recommend messing with body chemistry with a miracle drug that has not been proven successful against specific abnormalities. 

I agree with you 100 percent that exercise, proper diet, and self-control are the keys to good health. That’s my opinion. It seems to be yours, too. If he won’t appreciate a commonsense approach, let him speak with some of the respected doctors of our beloved community. I am sure they will advise caution.  Jido

Kosher with Confidence: Why Supervision Is Essential

Victor Cohen

The observance of kashrut is a cornerstone of Jewish life, among the most important means by which we set ourselves apart from the rest of the world. We do not eat in the same restaurants as others, we do not buy the same foods as others, and we handle our dishes much differently.

Thankfully, our generation is blessed with numerous highly-competent organizations that we can trust to certify products and establishments as kosher. These include household names such as the Orthodox Union (OU), Star-K, and the Jersey Shore Orthodox Rabbinate (JSOR). These organizations, among others, allow us to purchase food and eat at restaurants confidently, knowing that the food we consume was prepared in compliance with kashrut laws.

Unfortunately, not everyoneunderstands the “ins and outs” of how certification works, and there are those who are not aware its necessity for certain foods or establishments. They may say, “I just eat cheese,” or “I just eat fish,” or “I just get salad.” They may further the question the purpose of certification if “it’s all kosher ingredients.”

The truth is that there is much more to kashrut than just the “kosher ingredients.” People need to realize that even if all the ingredients are 100 percent kosher, the product could still be halachically forbidden for consumption.

To gain a clearer understanding of the issues at hand, and to receive some practical guidelines for kosher consumers, I had the honor of interviewing Rabbi Hayim Asher Arking, Administrator of JSOR. He patiently explainedfor us in general terms how kashrut works, where potential misunderstandings may arise, and what the real issues at play are.

The Meaning of “Certified Kosher”

“Certification” is a broad term. It can apply to foods which must be prepared in a certain manner, to foods that can easily be substituted with a non-kosher alternative, or to the status of the utensils used in production.

Some foods or drinks are always considered kosher. Water, for instance, is always kosher,even water with electrolytes. The same goes for unflavored coffee, plain raw rice, flour, sugar, and fruits which are not prone to infestation. (It should be noted that Israeli fruits and vegetables do require supervision). Some foods change kashrut status depending on the circumstances, such as cooked rice, artichoke hearts which are prone to infestation, and others. There are also foods which always require certification, no matter what the ingredient panel states, because they must be prepared according to certain conditions. Rabbi Arking gave six examples of food categories that require certification despite their kosher ingredients:

  1. All cheeses
  2. All cooked foods (because of issues with bishul akum– products cooked by a gentile, the use of non-kosher utensils, and potentially problematic ingredients)
  3. Wine, brandy, cognac
  4. Fish
  5. Meat/Poultry
  6. Vegetables

Milk vs. Cheese

Many people are unaware of the important distinction between milk and cheese in regard to modern-day kashrut.Rabbi Moshe Feinstein ruled that here in the United States, commercially-produced milk does not require certification, due to the stringent regulatory restrictions of the FDA,whichall but guarantee that the milk we purchase came from a cow, and not a non-kosher species. Outside the USA, every location requires evaluation. Many hold to a higher standard and use onlyhalav Yisrael – which means milk which was produced under supervision, rather than being presumed to be permissible.

Cheese, however, is treated far more stringently, as the sages forbade consuming gevinat akum – cheese produced by a gentile. Thus, pizza or pasta with cheese from a non-certified restaurant is prohibited. Bringing one’s own cheese to a non-kosher restaurant is not a solution, as numerous halachic issues remain, such as the status of the utensils, gentiles preparing the food, added ingredients, and others.

Wine

The production of wine requires proper supervision throughout the entire process, and secure sealings of all barrels while aging. When you go to a liquor store and see a wine bottle bearing kosher certification, that means that a kashrut organization has guaranteed it reaches your hands under kosher conditions, by assuring that the numerous halachot relevant to wine were upheld.  Consumers must be advised that if the label says “not mevushal,” then the wine becomes prohibited if it is handled by a gentile at any point after the seal was open.

Meat

Generally, even those who are less scrupulous in their kashrut observance recognize the need for kosher certification for meat. Most misunderstandings arise when it comes to fish, dairy products, and vegetables, which is why JSOR has made a concerted effort over the last several years to facilitate many kosher dairy restaurants throughout the Deal area, in order to promote kashrut observance.

Nevertheless, it is worthwhile to review the basic principles relevant to the kosher status of meat.

You are in the butchery, and in front of you are two steaks: Steak A and Steak B. Steak A is certified, and Steak B is not. What makes A kosher and not B?

The following guidelines must be adhered to for meat to be kosher:

  1. The meat must originate from a kosher species, such as a cow or sheep. Without valid certification, there is no guarantee that the meat was taken from an animal whose meat is permitted by the Torah for consumption.
  1. The animal must be slaughtered properly by a trained, certified shohet (“slaughterer”). The animal cannot be stunned through the slaughter period, and a certain kind of knife must be used.
  2. After slaughtering, the meat must be salted, certain veins and fats must be removed, and it must be handled properly.

Furthermore, meat in a non-certified restaurant may not be eaten even if it is otherwise kosher, because halachah forbids eating meat that was “concealed from view,” and not properly guarded.  And, the law of bishul akum forbids eating even inherently kosher food if it was cooked by a gentile. Even utensils used by a gentile for cooking become forbidden, such that the food cooked in them by a Jew thereafter may not be eaten.

Thus, when a restaurant is certified kosher, this means that the kashrut agency ascertained that all the ingredients used by the restaurant are kosher, and all the food served in the restaurant is prepared according to halachic requirements.

Fish is…Fishy

Many people mistakenly assume that since fish has far fewer kashrut restrictions than meat, it does not require supervision.  But this is not true.Alarmingly, many studies have found that“fish fraud” across the United States is at well over 30 percent, perhaps higher. It is incredibly easy to replace one fish with another – and this happens in stores, restaurants, and other establishments.

This means that if we buy fish without kosher supervision, we cannot know whether or not it originates from a permissible species. And when ordering fish in a non-certified restaurant, one also encounters the problem of bishul akum. We must emphasize that there are no halachic “loopholes” that can permit eating fish that does not have kosher supervision, and it must therefore be treated just as stringently as meat.

Vegetables

Vegetables are, in many ways, the most clear-cut category, though vegetables which are prone to infestation need to be checked before consumption. The checking is what makesthe produce kosher – and so it must be treated as non-kosher before it is inspected. The vegetables cannot be presumed to be checked, and thus salads in non-kosher restaurants are prohibited. Like with other foods, vegetables require certain procedures to become kosher, and unless these procedures are followed, they may not be eaten.

Needless to say, the laws of kashrut are intricate and complex, and in fact, some rabbis devote many years to the full-time study of these halachot. Additionally,the certification process is nuanced and complicated, with different agencies implementing different policies. Hopefully, though, this article offered the reader an informative and practical overview of how certification works, why it is needed, and how it applies to different food groups. If you have any specific questions about the status of a certain food, or of the validity of a particular agency’s certification, please direct them to your local rabbi.Baruch Hashem,over the past 50 years, our community has made significant strides in the area of kashrut. While some issues occasionally arise, new kosher restaurants continue to open, and people have become more aware of the need for supervision. Much of this is thanks to the work of the rabbinical, executive and operational teams at JSOR, who continue to facilitate the availability of kosher restaurants and products, which will positively impact halachic observance generally throughout our community.

M&S Softball 2025: Bigger. Bolder. Built for the Die-Hards

Sam Sutton

Summer in Deal means one thing: M&S Softball is back, and the 2025 season promises to be its most competitive, content-rich, and exciting chapter yet.

Every roster in the league is packed with ultimate die-hards. This isn’t casual softball. This is M&S – a summer-long battle between competitors who live for the moment and play for legacy.

Lights, Camera, Legacy: M&S Media Coverage

What truly elevates M&S Softball is its unmatched media presence.

Every game is livestreamed – and it’s not just about watching; it’s about being immersed. Co-commissioner Max Sutton leads the live play-by-play with a revolving cast of colorful commentators, bringing sharp insight, unpredictable energy, and off-the-cuff chemistry. Max is as unpredictable as it gets – and that’s what makes the broadcasts unforgettable.

After the final out, the production keeps rolling. High-definition highlight packages drop after every game – edited tight, loaded with emotion, and narrated by the unmistakable cadence of co-commissioner Sam I Am. His energetic professionalism, sharp wit, and ability to turn routine plays into unforgettable moments has made his voice as much a part of the M&S experience as the game itself. Whether it’s a walk-off bomb or a clutch defensive stand, Sam brings it to life like only he can. It’s more than a recap – it’s a retelling. A rewatchable. A moment in motion.

All content lives on the league’s growing YouTube channel: youtube.com/@samiampro.

And for real-time reaction and unfiltered banter? That’s where M&S Smack Talk thrives – a league-wide WhatsApp chat where highlights are shared, opinions are formed, and no moment goes unnoticed.

Carpool Chronicles: Built for the Whole Community

As summer heats up and M&S Softball takes center stage, Carpool Chronicles with Hank continues to be the most talked-about show in community sports media.

Hank Dweck is the cog of the show – the one driving the analysis, the controversy, and the conversation. His takes are sharp, his rankings are bold, and his delivery keeps players locked in and fans talking.

From Day 1, Carpool Chronicles was never just about M&S. It was designed to spotlight all major community leagues – from softball to basketball and everything in between – and it has quickly become the go-to source for authentic commentary, accountability, and banter. While Hank delivers the insight, Sam I Am hosts the ride, teeing up topics, pressing buttons, and guiding the show with the pacing and polish that’s made it one of the most-watched pieces of content in the community. Together, they’ve built something bigger than a recap – they’ve created a voice for the players, the fans, and the culture.

Seven Teams. One M&S Cup. All-In.

The M&S Cup isn’t just a trophy – it’s a piece of league history. Every champion since 2008 is etched into its base. And every player in 2025 wants to be next. Meet the captains and their squads:

Sephardic Bananas – Captain: Edmund Beyda

King Salomon: Part Deux– Captain: Michael “Sabon” Salomon

Stayin’ Alive – Captain: Michael “Melech” Solomon

The Thundering Hooves– Captain: Gabe Abadi

The Long Horns– Captain: Max Yedid

Vandelay Industries– Captain: Sammy Seruya

Kaboom!– Captain: Uri Adler

Each team was drafted with purpose – a mix of veterans, breakout stars, and clutch performers – all with one mission: Lift the Cup!

The full 2025 M&S schedule is now available at www.MandSbaseball.com.

Mabrouk – July 2025

Births – Baby Boy

Mr. & Mrs. Chaim Rishty

Joey & Gabriella Cohen

Morris & Norma Gindi

Ezra & Merle Antebi

Morris & Frieda Grazi

Mr. & Mrs. Micky Beyda

Joseph & Diana Rahmey

Eddie & Eve Matut

Ike & Frieda Massry

Marc & Michelle Shalom – Twins!!

Michale & Jacqueline Harary

Births – Baby Girl

Alan & Rebecca Fallas

Jojo & Gloria Shalom

Jack & Sonia Sitt

Michael & Mimi Haddad

Simon & Linda Botton

Harold & Grace Sutton

Charles & Nancy Haddad

Murray & Joy Dweck

Leo & Patti Picciotto

David & Gloria Gindi

Engagements

Vico Mizrahi to Cheryl Dweck

Joseph Leventer to Madeline Tawil

Fred Swaid to Coullete Dayon

Zookie Terzi to Jeanne Cohen

Larry Natkin to Rachel Fallas

Michael Gammal to Naomi Dayan

Weddings

Isaac Mishaan to Elizabeth Seruya

Jack Betesh to Teri Betesh

Michael Franco to Sarah Greenberg

Albert Mamrout to Fleurette Sultan

Leor Yazdi to Jennifer Mizrahi

Medical Halacha – Vitamins on Shabbat

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas

“Rabbi, I was wondering about something regarding Shabbat,” Sammy began. “I’m generally healthy, but I take vitamins regularly to help me feel strong. I’m unsure if the rules about taking medication on Shabbat apply to vitamins as well. Could you clarify this for me?”

Maachal Breiim for Mild Ailments

The Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 328:37) establishes that one may consume maachal breiim – regular foods and beverages that healthy individuals consume – even if they provide medicinal benefits. For example, someone with a mild cold, who is generally prohibited from taking medication on Shabbat due to the rabbinic decree of gezerat shehikat samemanim (the prohibition of grinding herbs to prepare medicine), is permitted to drink chicken soup or lemon tea with honey for relief, as these are considered regular foods and drinks consumed by healthy individuals. Gezerat shehikat samemanim does not apply to everyday foods. Based on this principle, Hacham Ovadia Yosef, zt”l, permits consuming soda water for heartburn relief on Shabbat (Halichot Olam Vol. 4, p. 205) as soda water is a regular, commonly consumed, beverage.

Maachal She’eino Breiim for Mild Ailments

Conversely, maachal she’eino breiim – foods not typically consumed by healthy individuals – should not be taken for medicinal purposes by someone with a mild ailment, due to the concern of gezerat shehikat samemanim (O.C. 328:37). For instance, homemade herbal remedies using herbs not commonly eaten are prohibited on Shabbat for minor illnesses. However, this restriction does not apply to a choleh she’ein bo sakana (a non-critically ill person), who is permitted to take necessary medication on Shabbat.

Maachal She’eino Breiim for Healthy Individuals

Regarding healthy individuals, the Beit Yosef (ibid) explains that the issue of eating maachal she’eino breiim on Shabbat does not apply to them,and there is noconcern of gezerat shehikat samemanim  as they are not sick. Therefore, a healthy person may consume natural herbal remedies (maachal she’eino breiim) even to strengthen their health. The Magen Avraham (328:43), however, disagrees, permitting such foods only when consumed for hunger or thirst, not solely for health enhancement. Hacham Ovadia Yosef (Chazon Ovadia, Shabbat, Vol. 3, p. 363) explains that those following the Shulchan Aruch may consume maachal she’eino breiim to maintain or improve their health.

Vitamins on Shabbat

In this context, Hacham Ovadia Yosef explicitly permits healthy individuals to take vitamins on Shabbat (ibid), even for the purpose of maintaining good health (Halichot Olam, Vol. 4, p. 207). This is because a healthy person is allowed to consume maachal she’eino breiim.Bottom of Form It’s important to note that those who follow the opinion of the Magen Avraham might not permit taking vitamins on Shabbat, as they are typically not consumed to satisfy hunger. However, Hacham Ben Zion Abba Shaul (Ohr Lezion 2:36:10) suggests a potential leniency even according to the Magen Avraham’s view, arguing that vitamins could be classified as maachal breiim due to their common consumption by healthy individuals.

Conclusion

In response to Sammy’s question, it is permitted for a healthy person to take vitamins on Shabbat. This is because the issue of eating maachal she’eino breiim on Shabbat does not extend to healthy individuals. This aligns with the ruling of Hacham Ovadia Yosef, who permits healthy individuals taking vitamins on Shabbat even for health reasons. While some authorities, like the Magen Avraham, might hold a more restrictive view, the prevailing Sephardic approach, following the Shulchan Aruch and the rulings of Hacham Ovadia Yosef, considers it acceptable for  healthy individuals to take vitamins on Shabbat. Furthermore, the suggestion of Hacham Ben Zion Abba Shaul offers a potential basis for leniency even within other halachic perspectives, given the common use of vitamins by healthy people. Therefore, according to the Sephardic tradition, Sammy would be allowed to take his vitamins on Shabbat.

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer and author on Medical Halacha. He heads the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. His latest book is “Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome.” To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com.

From the Files of the Mitzvah Man Hesed Stories: Training Your Child to Do Hesed

Pnina Souid

One day, the Mitzvah Man organization received a unique request. The caller, Mrs. H, explained:

Baruch Hashem, we are a wealthy family living in a luxurious home. Everything our family could possibly need is at our fingertips. Financially we are on top of the world. However, our 14-year-old son, Joey, just takes it all for granted. He is becoming extremely spoiled and doesn’t seem to be appreciative of what he has. We want to instill inhim a sense of values and a sense of appreciation.

“I have an idea, but it might not work. We know that the Mitzvah Man organization sends volunteers to deliver food packages to the needy and elderly. Might you be able to send a volunteer to pick up my son so that he could help him with the deliveries?”

The Mitzvah Man replied, “It would be our pleasure.”

The Experiment

The following Thursday afternoon, a volunteer named Avi arrived at Mrs. H’s home to pick Joey up. Their first stop was to pick up the boxes to be delivered.

Avi explained, “These food packages are goingto people who are ill, elderly, or in financial trouble. They have no family members to provide for them. Today, we are making six deliveries. Thank you for helping with this act of kindness.”

That day, the temperature hit 95 degrees and it was extremely humid. It was not a day you would find many people happily schlepping heavy boxes.

After Avi and Joey loaded the van, they headed to an apartment building where there were two families receiving food boxes. As Avi got out of the van Joey asked him if he should wait for him.

“No, I want you to feel the mitzvah,” Avi responded.

Joey had never seen such a rundown building. He had never been exposed to abject poverty in his life.

Joey told Avi that he was not going to liftthe boxes. But Avi responded that he needed his help.

“I will take one box and you will take one box.”

Joey looked up at the tenth floor and asked, “Why are the windows open? Don’t they have A/C?”

Avi said, “They can’t afford it. Not everyone can.”

Joey noticed all the flies in the building and hesitated. Avi was right there with him.

“We have no choice. This is poverty and this is how these people live their lives 24/7. Let’s go. These families are waiting for their food delivery. You go to apartment 10L, and I will go to apartment 8B. You go first.”

“How do I open the lobby door?”

“You put the box down, press the button to open the door, pick the box back up, and push the door open. Then, when you get to the apartment, knock on the door and leave the box there. Don’t wait for them to open the door. We don’t want to embarrass the family.”

Joey looked around. He took in the reality of what it must feel like to actually live in such a dilapidated building. His expression was at first questioning, then thoughtful.

By the time Avi and Joey finished all the deliveries they were both covered in sweat. Avi reported back to the Mitzvah Man that their mission was accomplished. He assumed that Joey would not be back.

The Happy Ending

Mrs. H called the Mitzvah Man. “What did you do to my son? He loved it!”

“Excuse me, but what do you mean?” the Mitzvah Man asked.

“He wants to go again!”

Avi picked up Joey the following week. It was just as hot and humid as the previous week. Joey did his share of the deliveries with a smile. He continued to join Avi for another five weeks until school started.

His mother called the Mitzvah Man thrilled. “I think that this hesed has really made a difference. Joey is showing more appreciation for everything. I am incredibly grateful for the hesed that you did for our family.”

Eight years later, Avi sawhis old delivery buddy Joey, now with his own car,which was loaded full of food boxes!

Joey toldAvi, “I have my own car and I decided to dedicate myself to making food deliveries. The people need the food, and I am going to get it to them no matter what.” Train your children early in life to give to others. They deserve your investment in making them ba’alei hesed. Doing hesed is best learned young. Lead by example and b’ezrat Hashem you will see the results.

Empowering Our Community Through Meaningful Careers

In the heart of our vibrant and close-knit community, we hold fast to traditions that define us: strong family values, a deep sense of responsibility, and a commitment to both spiritual and personal success. These values have helped our community flourish across generations, blending the sacred and the practical with remarkable grace.

As our community continues to grow, so too does the need for purposeful careers – roles that not only support our families but also align with our beliefs, character, and long-term vision. For those who prioritize a balanced life, this harmony is essential: we seek integrity in our work, flexibility in our lives, and the ability to positively impact those around us.

A Career with Purpose and Flexibility

At New York Life, we understand the unique rhythm of a values-driven lifestyle. Personal commitments holidays, and time with family aren’t just “benefits” to accommodate – they are priorities to be honored. That’s why we offer career opportunities that provide the flexibility to uphold your commitments while building a future rooted in financial security and community leadership.

A career as a financial professional isn’t simply about numbers. It’s about building relationships, guiding families through important financial decisions, and becoming a trusted presence in your circle. Many of our top-performing professionals are individuals who have successfully balanced familyand professional achievement.

Why This Career Resonates with Our Values

  • Family-Oriented Work: You’ll be helping families safeguard their futures – whether it’s through life insurance, retirement planning, or intergenerational wealth transfer.
  • Community-Centered: Your clients are often people you already know and care about. Your integrity and understanding of their needs become key assets.
  • Entrepreneurial Spirit: With the freedom to build your own practice, you’re not tied to the conventional 9–5. You control your schedule, your goals, and your impact.
  • Legacy Building: Just as we pass down traditions and values, we also pass down financial stability and ethical business conduct. This is a career that honors both.

Support from a Community-Focused Team

We are actively seeking candidates who are passionate about making a difference. As a Managing Partner at New York Life Brooklyn General Office, I understand the importance of balancing personal values with professional growth. I work personally with new professionals to provide mentorship, understanding, and long-term career development.

Whether you’re exploring a new path or looking for a career that aligns with your values, I invite you to consider how a role at New York Life can empower you and those around you. Let’s build something meaningful together – something that honors our past and secures our future. For more information, please contact Managing Partner, David Hoory, dhoory@newyorklife.com, (718) 307-3400.For more information about financial professional income and benefits, please visit www.newyorklife.com.New York Life is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

“Hadran Alach Masechet Ta’anit!” – Master Masechet Moed Katan with Oraysa

Excitement is mounting among the thousands of Oraysa students around the globe as they approach the end of their study of Masechet Ta’anit. The students have been working hard for the last three months, learning and reviewing this Masechet, which focuses on the fasts to be observed and prayers to be recited in situations of drought. Masechet Ta’anit also includes numerous aggadic (non-halachic) sections which present vital, fundamental concepts relevant to one’s service of Gd.

With this Masechet nearing completion, the students of Oraysa are now preparing to begin the next Masechet – Moed Katan, which deals mainly with the halachot of Hol Ha’mo’ed (the interim days of Pesach and Sukkot), and the halachot of avelut (mourning). This program affords students a unique opportunity to delve into these topics which are somewhat less familiar than many other sections of the Talmud.

Moed Katan is the second-to-last Masechet in Seder Moed, and the students are already excitedly anticipating their siyum celebrating the completion of this seder, scheduled for the beginning of Kislev, 5786 (end of November of this year). The siyum will be celebrated here in the United States, as well as in Israel and Europe. Thousands of Oraysa participants are expected to attend each event to mark this special milestone and monumental accomplishment.  This celebration of the completion of an entire seder will be the first of its kind since the Oraysa program was founded nearly six years ago, marking the culmination of 12 Masechtot – hundreds of pages of Gemara.

The Oraysa Amud V’Chazara program was developed in collaboration with leading Rosheh Yeshivah and Torah sages to meet the growing demand for a Gemara learning framework that balances consistent progression with meaningful review. This worldwide initiative is designed to unite and empower devoted students through a structured daily learning regimen that incorporates both new material and review of previously studied material. The pace is perfect for mastering the Talmud and retaining the knowledge. The structured yet flexible approach makes the program accessible to the entire spectrum of Torah learners – from kollel students to educators to laymen. Oraysa enables every participant, regardless of his background and schedule, to grow in Torah scholarship and deepen his connection to Torah learning. Numerous different resources are provided to participants on a daily, weekly and monthly basis, both digitally and in print, to help with the study, including world-class shiurim available in video or audio format.

The Oraysa project has, with Gd’s help, seen extraordinary growth with every new Masechet, as new study groups continue to form, and new participants continue to join throughout the world.

Oraysa has become a global movement, connecting approximately 30,000 participantsin 370 groups across 100 cities worldwide.

Join thousands of Oraysa students as they embark on their journey through Masechet Moed Katan. Savor the satisfaction of learning in a goal-oriented way with a built-in system for review and retention, ensuring that every pagestays with you for years to come.

To join the program, for more information, or to help establish a study group in your community, please contact Oraysa at 914.8.ORAYSA or email info@oraysa.org.

Positive Parenting – Self-Esteem Building Strategy: “Your Interest, My Interest”

Tammy Sassoon

One of the most powerful yet simple ways to build your child’s self-esteem is by showing genuine interest in the things they care about. Whether it’s sports, drawing, construction, or skateboarding, when parents actively engage with their child’s passions, it sends a clear and affirming message: You matter. What you care about matters to me. I see you.

Healthy self-esteem in children is rooted in the feeling of being known, accepted, and valued. A child who feels seen in their uniqueness grows up with a stronger sense of self, more confidence in their abilities, and a greater willingness to take on challenges. Here’s why showing interest in your child’s interests is so effective, and how you can do so in meaningful ways.

Why Showing Interest Matters

It Communicates Unconditional Acceptance: When you take time to ask questions about your child’s favorite game or sit beside them while they draw, you’re showing that your love and attention are not based on what you think is important, but what they do. This fosters a sense of unconditional acceptance, which is a key to self-esteem. Children begin to internalize the idea that they don’t have to change who they are to earn your approval.

Showing Interest Strengthens Emotional Connection: Every child wants to feel connected to their parents. When you take an interest in their world, you’re not just gathering information – you’re entering their emotional space. This strengthens your relationship and lays the foundation for open communication. Kids who feel emotionally connected to their parents are more likely to express themselves, seek guidance, and bounce back from setbacks with resilience.

Showing Interest Builds Competence and Confidence: Children often express their budding skills and talents through the things they’re interested in. When you show enthusiasm and support, it encourages them to keep practicing, learning, and exploring. For example, a child who loves music will feel more confident if a parent listens to their new song or attends their recital. Your engagement validates their efforts and motivates them to keep growing.

Showing Interest Teaches Self-Worth Not Based on Achievement: When parental attention is only given to performance – grades, sports trophies, or other traditional accomplishments – children may start to believe their worth is tied to how well they do. But when a parent is interested in the joy their child finds in building LEGO creations or caring for plants, the child learns that who they are – not just what they do – is valuable.

How to Show Genuine Interest

Join Your Children – on Their Terms: If your child is into something you’re not familiar with – like music, coding, or collecting bugs – don’t dismiss it. Sit beside them as they explain, or even better, let them teach you. Let them take the lead, and try to experience the world through their eyes.

Make Space for Their Interests: Support your child’s interests by making time and space for them. This could mean signing them up for a local class, providing the tools they need, or just creating room in the family schedule to pursue their passion. When you prioritize their interests, you send a message that they are worth investing in.

Celebrate Effort and Curiosity: Shift the focus from outcomes to enthusiasm. “It’s so cool how you figured out how to build this,” or “You’ve learned so much about how guitars work!” will set the tone for further development in that area. Praise that acknowledges their effort and love of learning fuels a growth mindset and a deep sense of self-worth.

Final Thoughts

Showing interest in your child’s interests may seem like a small act, but it has a big impact. It tells them: You are important. Your thoughts and passions are worthy of attention. Over time, this forms the foundation of a strong, healthy self-esteem that will carry them through childhood and beyond.

As a parent, you don’t have to master every hobby or love every game your children enjoy – but your presence, your curiosity, and your willingness to step into their world speaks volumes. When children feel seen, they learn to see their own worth. And that is a gift they will carry for life.

Words of Rabbi Eli J. Mansour: Embracing the Challenge of Unity

It was not a war they wanted, but when it was over, they found themselves with huge swaths of precious territory.

We refer here not to the modern miracle of Israel’s Six-Day War in 1967, but rather to our ancestors’ miraculous conquest of two large kingdoms east of the Jordan River shortly before they crossed into the Land of Israel.

Beneh Yisrael asked Sihon, ruler of the Emorite Kingdom, permission to harmlessly cross through his country to shorten their journey to their homeland.  Sihon not only refused, but quickly mobilized his army and launched an unprovoked attack.  With Gd’s help, Beneh Yisrael vanquished Sihon’s army and, in fact, his entire kingdom, seizing theterritory.  Og, king of the neighboring Bashan region, mistakenly thought he could succeed where Sihon had failed, and attacked Beneh Yisrael.  He, too, suffered defeat, and his territory – like that of Sihon – fell into Israelite hands.

Two of Beneh Yisrael’s twelve tribes – Reuven and Gad – saw the great economic potential posed by the vast, verdant pastures of the newly-conquered territory.  Herdsmen by profession, the men of these tribes approached Moshe and asked to permanently settle this region.  Rather than cross over with the other tribes into Eretz Yisrael, the land of Avraham,, Yitzhak and Yaakov, the people of Reuven and Gad preferred to remain east of the Jordan which was perfectly suited for their large flocks of cattle.

As Bad as the Spies?

Moshe responded by harshly censuring these tribes for making such a request.  He compared them to the meragelim – the ten spies whom he had sent to scout the Land of Israel nearly forty years earlier.  The spies returned with a frightening report, and discouraged the people from proceeding into the land, convincing them that they were powerless against the fearsome armies of the Canaanites in Eretz Yisrael.  The people were seized with terror, and decided not to proceed.  Gd killed the spies, and punished the nation by leading them through the desert for forty years until that entire generation perished.  Moshe charged that the tribes of Reuven and Gad were just like the spies, refusing to enter the land, preferring to remain where they were.

Reuven and Gad then clarified to Moshe that this was not their intention.  Their plan was that their men would join the other tribes across the Jordan River and assume a leading role in the war effort, in the conquest of Eretz Yisrael.  Only after the victory over the enemies and the successful capture of the land would the men return to their wives and children back east of the river, where they would permanently reside.

Moshe accepted this arrangement.  He instructed his successor, Yehoshua, that if the tribes of Reuven and Gad fulfill their promise, and join the other tribes in the military campaign to seize the Land of Israel, then they were to be given the region east of the Jordan River as their permanent territory.

Let us consider Moshe’s harsh accusation that the people of Reuven and Gad resembled the spies.  We must ask, is this really true?  Even if Moshe deemed their request inappropriate, how were they like the spies?  Did they try to frighten the people?  Did they deny Gd’s ability to help Beneh Yisrael defeat the armies of Canaan? 

To answer this question, we need to revisit the story of the spies, and, specifically, to understand who the spies were and what drove them to do what they did.

A Story of Misguided Piety

The Torah (Bamidbar 13:3) refers to the spies with the term “anashim,” which Rashi interprets as denoting men of distinction.  Moshe chose for this important mission not ordinary people, but rather some of the most important and distinguished members of the nation.  As Rashi emphasized, the meragelim were righteous men at the time they were selected for this job.  But something led them astray, and drove them to betray their mission and convince the people not to enter the Land of Israel.

Some rabbis advanced the bold, counterintuitive theory that it was specifically the spies’ piety that caused their downfall.  Precisely their fierce passion for spirituality and for closeness to Gd caused them to insist on remaining in the desert rather than proceeding to Eretz Yisrael.

In the desert, Beneh Yisrael lived a purely spiritual existence.  They were sustained supernaturally, with manna falling from the heavens, and a miraculous well traveling with them to provide water.  They were protected by Gd’s “clouds of glory” that encircled them, and their clothes never wore out.  They had no need to work for a living, and they spent their days learning Torah from Moshe and Miriam.  There was practically nothing mundane about their lives.

This would change drastically upon crossing into Eretz Yisrael.  Once in the land, they would no longer receive miraculous food and water.  They would need to farm and to build homes, cities and infrastructure.  They would need to train an army to fight wars against bitter enemies with advanced weaponry.  No longer would they spend their days immersed entirely in Torah and spiritual devotion.

And this, some explain, is what the spies feared.  They wanted to remain in the desert.  They were not prepared to forfeit their miraculous, spiritual existence, their ability to abstain entirely from mundane activities and devote their time and attention exclusively to spirituality.

But this kind of piety was gravely misguided.  We are not placed in this mundane world in order to escape it.  Rather, we are here to infuse our mundane world with spirituality.

Serving Gd in the “desert,” when all of one’s physical needs are miraculously provided for, when one has nothing to do but listen to Moshe Rabbenu’s teachings, is relatively easy.  There are few temptations and few religious challenges.  We are not meant to serve Gd under those pristine conditions, without struggle.  Instead, we are meant to embrace the challenge of engaging in the realm of the mundane while elevating this realm through strict Torah observance and by allotting considerable amounts of time for spiritual engagement. 

If a person has all his material needs cared for, he does not need to struggle to show his religious commitment.  But if a person needs to work for a living, and he wakes up early to pray with a minyan, and he learns Daf Yomi on the train, and he conducts all his business affairs ethically and courteously, and he refrains from work on Shabbat and holidays despite the loss of revenue, and he retains his beliefs and valueseven while engaging with people who do not share those beliefs and values – he truly shows his devotion to Gd.  This is how we are meant to serve Gd.

For this reason, the spies’ piety was misguided.  We are to serve Gd in the Land of Israel, within the realm of natural, mundane living, and not in the ideal conditions of the “desert.”

The Spiritual Shepherds

Possibly, this was also the mistake of Reuven and Gad.

Their desire to remain east of the Jordan River might have been spiritually driven.  Rather than cross into the land, where they would have to work as farmers, spending their days plowing, sowing, harvesting and collecting, they wanted to live as shepherds, enjoying the calm and serenity of the open pastures.

Several of our nation’s greatest spiritual giants, such as Yaakov, Moshe, and King David, worked as shepherds, and for good reason.  Shepherding, we might say, is spiritual work.  The shepherd merely walks with his herds among the fields, where he finds himself alone with his Creator.  This profession allows a person to spend his day in “hitbodedut,” in silent meditation, in solitude, speaking to and connecting with Gd. 

This might be what the people of Reuven and Gad wanted.  They sought the spiritual life of shepherding over the busy life of farming.  They wanted to bond with the Almighty the easy way – in the open pastures east of the Jordan River, rather than embracing the struggle of injecting spirituality into the farmer’s grueling workday.  This was their mistake, for which Moshe compared them to the spies.

It was only once they committed to join the war effort, to assume the challenge of infusing the realm of the mundane with spirituality, that their request was granted.

Unity Through Struggle

The message conveyed by this story, then, is that Torah isn’t supposed to be easy.  We aren’t meant to observe mitzvot only under pristine, ideal conditions.  To the contrary, we display our commitment precisely by remaining loyal to Gd when this loyalty requires struggle and sacrifice.

We might apply this message to the period we begin this month – the period of ben hametzarim, when we mourn the destruction of the Bet Hamikdash, a calamity which, tradition teaches, befell us on account of the sin of sinat hinam, hatred and strife among our nation.  This is a time customarily observed as a time for focusing on how to improve our sense of unity and togetherness, on eliminating tension and fighting, creating closer bonds with our fellow Jews.

We must remember that ahdut – unity – requires struggle.  We don’t create ahdut by loving and respecting our fellow Jews when this is easy – when we have no reason to dislike them, when we agree on everything, when we see things the same way.  We build ahdut precisely when it’s difficult, precisely when we have reason to feel resentful, when we have strong disagreements, when we rightly oppose that which someone else said or did.  This is how we achieve unity – through struggle, by overcoming our instinctive feelings of disdain and resentment, by truly loving and respecting those whom we might feel justified in disliking.

Let us embrace this struggle, and make the commitment to bond with all our fellow Jews, both within our community and beyond, so we can, once and for all, cure the destructive ill of sinhat hinam and become worthy of our final redemption, may it come speedily and in our times, amen.