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The Women of Dirshu – Joy and Inspiration at the World Siyum for Women in Newark Symphony Hall

Esther Birnbaum

“From where do you get your emunah [faith]? From where do you get such iron-clad bitahon [trust in Hashem]? Please tell me, I need to know!”

The answer? In a word: “From Dirshu!”

This fascinating exchange was related at the deeply inspiring Dirshu World Siyum for ladies at Newark Symphony Hall on Sunday night, 15 Shevat/February 9. Thousands of women converged on Newark, New Jersey to revel in the Torah accomplishments of their husbands, and to celebrate true simchat haTorah – joy of Torah – at a special event catering specifically to women.

It was a night to remember, a night that began with crowds of women lining an entire city street and stretching around the corner for another half-block; a night filled with hizuk (inspiration), stressing the pivotal role played by each and every woman who supports her husband’s Torah learning; a night replete with uplifting song and dance, expressing the joy felt by women over their share in Torah… Indeed, a night to remember!

The program, which offered a live feed to the main siyum which was taking place simultaneously a few blocks down, was interspersed with magnificent musical performances by world-renowned singers Mrs. Bracha Jaffe and Mrs. Malky Giniger, and an inspiring speech by Rebbetzin Sarah Meisels, daughter of the Bobover Rebbe, Rav Shlomo Halberstam, zt”l, and wife of Rav Yaakov Yisrael Meisels, shlita, the Bobover Rov and Rosh Yeshiva in Israel.

The Dirshu Answer

The background to the mysterious exchange cited at the outset is a powerful story about a mother who at first found herself unable to accept the reality of her newborn daughter’s physical disability, and a father who firmly, and with tremendous strength, declared that just as Hashem accepts and loves all of His children despite their deficiencies, they, as parents, would also accept this child with all of her deficiencies.

The unexpected climax of the story was the father’s declaration that it was Dirshu that provided him with the strength, the emunah and the bitahon to accept the test that Hashem had thrust upon them with a physically challenged child.

“Just this week, I got back my first Dirshu test with a very high mark,” he explained. “When I saw that mark, I said, ‘I got the message! You want me to use this Torah to get a high mark in life…’ When our baby was born, I realized that it was a moment when I was being tested, and I decided to show Hakadosh Baruch Hu that just like I could learn Torah and get a high mark on the test…I can also get a good mark in life, in this new test that He sent us. My yiras Shamayim [fear of Gd]] has taken on a different level since I joined Dirshu.”

This remarkable story told over at the women’s event, by Mrs. Jackie Bitton, was but one highlight of an unforgettable event filled with genuine joy and overpowering emotion.

The Woman’s Role

Rebbetzin Meisels pieced together a magnificent tapestry of hizuk, explaining with numerous stories and examples of how a woman’s very purpose in life is to infuse her husband, her home, and her family with Torah and spirituality.

“Have you ever wondered,” the Rebbetzin asked, “about the berachah that we say every morning – the berachah of ‘la’asok bedivreh Torah – to engage in words of Torah’? In what way are we ‘osek’ [‘engaged’] in Torah? In what way is a woman’s job Torah?”

She answered, “A woman’s job is to encourage our husbands and children. When they begin their day each morning, it is our job to infuse them with simcha [joy]. Yes, when your husband dashes in, grabs a few bites of supper and runs out again, wish him hatzlahah [success]! When the kids are crying, you’ve had a long day, and you want nothing more than your husband’s help…that is your helek [portion] in Torah! That is what infuses your entire family with yirat Shamayim!”

The Rebbetzin proceeded to note Gd’s instruction to Avraham to heed everything that his wife, Sarah, said. Through this instruction, the Rebbetzin explained, Gd “was infusing the woman with the power, the responsibility, to inject spirituality into our families.”

Moreover, she said, whereas Gd created all other creatures with both male and female genders right at the outset, the creation of the human being began with just the creation of Adam. Havah was created later, after Gd commanded Adam the seven “Noachide laws” charged upon all mankind. And, as opposed to Adam, who was created from the ground, Havah was created from Adam himself, from Gan Eden. The reason, the Rebbetzin explained, is because Havah was given a very special job – to infuse Gan Eden into the earth, into her family.

She then cited the Sages’ teaching that a man without a wife is a man without Torah. Even if an unmarried man learns Torah, the Rebbetzin said, “he is lacking the ‘powers’ of his wife, the spirituality, the serenity, the yirat Shamayim.”

The Value of Every Moment

It was a special moment when Mrs. Malky Giniger introduced Mrs. Shiffy Hofstedter with a magnificent song to the beautiful words, “Etz haim hi – It [Torah] is a tree of life.”  Mrs. Bitton then presented Mrs. Hofstedter with a special clock as a gift, explaining, “She is the woman behind Dirshu! She, more than anyone, has shown each and every one of us the value of every single moment!”

Another stirring moment was the remarkable pantomimed dance and song created by the world-famous Mrs. Miriam Israeli, and sung by Mrs. Malky Giniger.

Throughout the evening, Mrs. Bracha Jaffe sang a stirring potpourri of slow, haunting melodies, as well as lively, uplifting songs, each one introduced with a connection to Torah and to the Siyum HaShas. The sight of so many women joining to express gratitude to Hashem for the precious gift of a Torah life left an indelible impact upon everyone in attendance, which will remain with them for many years to come.

The Voice of Torah

Citing the Vietzner Rav, Rebbetzin Meisels told the story of a delegation of rabbis that came before Empress Marie Theresa to plead on behalf of the Jews. During the visit, one of the rabbis screamed in pain.

The Empress remonstrated, “Are you raising your voice to me??!”

The rabbi replied, “That voice is not MY voice. It is the voice of thousands of fathers, mothers and children crying out in pain through me.”

On the basis of this story, the Vietzner Rav explained that when Pharaoh’s daughter found an infant, Moshe, in a basket in the Nile River, and she heard him crying,  she said, “Miyaldeh ha’Ivrim zeh – This is from the Hebrew children,” – with the word zeh (“this”) referring to Moshe’s cries, which represented the cries of all the Jewish children who were being thrown into the Nile.

Similarly, the voice that echoed throughout Newark that night was the voice of the daily daf, the voice of thousands of pages of Gemara which the devoted wives empowered their husbands to learn… and this is the voice that will, please Gd, continue to reverberate throughout the Jewish Nation, forever.

 

Between Carpools – More in a 9×13…

Last month, we gave you two desserts that can be prepped entirely in a 9×13 pan. This month, it’s time for the real food. After all, it’s a busy time of year and you can use some dishes that make things a little easier. These in particular are a little more special and would also work for your seudah.

9×13 Fancy Rice

This rice is on oldie but goodie that always satisfies. Make it in minutes in one pan!

2 cups rice (I use Uncle Ben’s)

1 red pepper, finely diced

1 green pepper, finely diced

1 (10 ounce) can sliced mushrooms, drained

2 tablespoons onion soup mix

2 tablespoons soy sauce

¼ cup oil

3 ¾ cups water

Salt and pepper to taste

  1. Preheat oven to 350⁰F.
  2. Combine all ingredients in a 9×13 pan. Mix well. Cover and bake for 1 hour.
  3. Veggies will rise to the top when cooking, so mix well before serving.

This side dish can be prepared in advance and refrigerated.

9×13 Minute Steaks and Yukon Golds

In this dish, there’s minute steaks hiding under onions and garlic, and soft buttery Yukon Gold potatoes hiding under the steak.

It works great as a supper that you put up in the morning, leave the house, and come home to…or even as an easy Yom Tov dish because, well, it’s steak! It’ll work with many cuts of meat.

Bottom Layer:

4-5 Yukon Gold potatoes, peeled and sliced

4 garlic cloves, sliced

½ onion, chopped

1 ½ tablespoons olive oil

¼ teaspoon black pepper

1 teaspoon paprika (sweet or smoked, whatever is available)

1 teaspoon garlic powder

2 teaspoons salt

Middle Layer:

6 minute steaks

Top Layer:

1 onion, sliced

4 garlic cloves, whole

1 teaspoon salt

½ teaspoon garlic powder

½ teaspoon paprika

Dash black pepper

  1. Preheat oven to 275⁰F
  2. Combine all bottom layer ingredients and spread in a 9×13 inch pan.
  3. Top with minute steaks.
  4. Combine all top layer ingredients and spread on top of steaks.
  5. Cover pan well and bake for 6 hours.

Yield: 6 servings

Between Carpools is the lifestyle app/site for the busy Jewish woman.  You’ll find home and organizing tips, parenting insights, activities, how-to’s and DIYs, and of course, entertaining ideas, recipes, and inspiring reads. The APP is available at the App Store and Google Play. If you have a kosher smartphone, you can visit your local TAG office to have the app downloaded. Here’s a taste. Enjoy!

Victoria Dwek, Leah Schapira, Renee Muller, Shaindy Menzer, & Esti Waldman

www.betweencarpools.com

The Lighter Side – February 2020

A Cool Joke

Q: Why shouldn’t you tell a joke while you’re skating?

A: Because the ice might crack up!

Morde S.

Occupational Hazards

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn’t it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed.

Jack V. Grazi

What My Grandfather Did

A poor man walks into an inn and demands that the innkeeper give him some meat.

“How do you plan to pay for it?” the innkeeper asks.

“Well I should tell you now that I don’t have any money,” the poor man says.

“No money? Get out of my inn!” yells the innkeeper.

“Oh, no!” the poor man yells back. “If I don’t get what I asked for, I’ll do what my grandfather did when he wasn’t served!”

Frightened by the threat, the innkeeper quickly gets him the food that he asked for.

Then, the poor man asks for wine.

“But you told me you don’t have any money!” says the innkeeper.

“I already told you, if I don’t get what I asked for, I’ll do what my grandfather did when he wasn’t served!” the poor man shouts back.

Afraid, the innkeeper quickly pours the man wine.

As the poor man is leaving after finishing his meal, the innkeeper asks him, “Excuse me, I am very curious, what exactly did your grandfather do when he wasn’t served?”

“Oh,” the poor man said, “he went hungry.”

JoJo T.

Physical Fitness Follies

Jennifer: I signed up for an exercise class yesterday, but I think it’s a big joke.

Sharon: Really, why?

Jennifer: Well for one thing they asked me to come wearing loose-fitting clothing.

Sharon: So. What’s wrong with that?

Jennifer: Well obviously, if I had any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn’t have needed to sign up in the first place!

Rita B.

Riding It Out

Alice decided enough was enough – she was going to join a gym and start getting in shape. She joined an aerobics class and the instructor had everyone lie on their backs with their legs up as if pedaling a bike. After several minutes, Alice suddenly stopped.

“Why did you stop pedaling?” the instructor shouted to Alice.

“I didn’t stop,” Alice said, wheezing. “I’m going downhill!”

Carolyn E.

Buttered Bread

Moishe and his friend Heshy went out for lunch together every Tuesday. One Tuesday, Moishe wrestled with the problem of whether or not to butter his bread.

“I like butter on my bread,” he said. “But my diet strictly forbids butter. Maybe I should call Miriam and ask her what to do.”

“Moishe,” Heshy said, “don’t be ridiculous. You’re a grown man. You should be able to decide, without your wife’s help, whether or not to butter your own bread.”

“You’re right,” Moishe said. “I’ll just have the butter, that’s all.”

When the waiter arrived with the check, Heshy pointed to Moishe and said, “He’s paying.”

“What?” Moishe said. “Why should I have to pay the whole bill?”

“Because if you don’t,” Heshy said, “I’ll tell Miriam about the butter.”

Marlene G.

Phone Familiarity

Operator: “Thank you for calling Sears Customer Service, what’s you name please?”

Customer: “My name is Steven Harrison. What’s your name?” Operator: “Sorry sir, we’re not allowed to give our names, but my operator number is 2055.” Customer: [disappointed] “So may I call you by your first digit, or would that be too personal?”

Morris H.

Office Authority

The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his office. “What’s your name?” he asked the new guy.

“Abe,” the new guy replied.

The manager scowled, “Look, I don’t know what kind of a namby-pamby place you worked at before, but I don’t call anyone by their first name. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my employees by their last name only: Smith, Jones, Baker…that’s all. And I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson. Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?”

The new guy sighed, “Darling. My name is Abe Darling.”

“Okay Abe, the next thing I want to tell you is…”

David F.

Daddy Sitter

Brenda had to leave the house for a few hours so she asked her husband Saul to watch their new baby, Jack. Since it was going to be the first time Saul ever cared for the baby, Brenda carefully explained to him how to feed him if he’s hungry and burp him after he eats. She also left him a brand new box of diapers and baby wipes.

When she returned a few hours later, Saul bragged about how easy it was.

“This parenting stuff is really a piece of cake. I don’t know why everyone makes such a big deal. The only problem is that the baby smells a little,” he said.

Brenda picks up the baby and notices that his diaper is very full and the box of diapers remained unopened.

“Why didn’t you change his diaper?” Brenda demanded.

“Well, I read the diaper box,” replied Saul, “and it said ‘Up to 12 pounds!’”

R.N.

The Thing in the Garden

Mousa, an elderly Arab man, decided one day that he would like to plant potatoes in the large garden behind his house in Brooklyn. But being that he was alone and in his seventies, he realized that he was in no shape to do any serious gardening. He decided to ask his son Ahmed, who was living in Egypt, for advice on what to do. The old man sent an email explaining the problem: “Son, I am very sad because I can’t plant potatoes in my garden. I am sure, if only you were here, you would help and dig up the garden for me. Regards, Your Father”

The following day, the old man receives a response email from his son: “Father, Whatever you do, don’t touch the garden. It is there that I have hidden the ‘THING.’ All the best, Ahmed”

Within hours of receiving the email, a troop of engineers from the Army, Marines, FBI, and CIA descend on the house. After securing the perimeter, they unearth the whole garden, searching every inch and turning over every stone. After hours of searching, they leave disappointed, not having found anything.

The next day, the old man receives another email from his son. “Father, I hope the garden is dug up by now and you can plant your potatoes. That’s all I could do for you from here. Regards, Ahmed”

David B.

And the Winner Is…

David won a toy at a raffle. He called his five kids together to ask which one should have the present.

“Who is the most obedient?” he asked. “Who never talks back to Mommy? Who does everything she says?”

Five small voices answered in unison:

“Okay, Abba, you get the toy.”

Barbra R.

An Outpouring of Love – Over 22,000 Join Leading Rabbis in Celebrating the Dirshu World Siyum in Newark

Over 22,000 Join Leading Rabbis in Celebrating the Dirshu World Siyum in Newark

Chaim Gold

It was an unforgettable moment when the Sanzer Rebbe, shlita, who had flown in from Israel, entered the cavernous Prudential Center in Newark on 15 Shevat (February 9).

The more than 20,000 people who had assembled to celebrate the Dirshu organization’s Siyum of the Talmud immediately rose to their feet, craning their necks to catch a glimpse of the great sage, as the phenomenal orchestra played the song, “Tzadik Katamar Yifrah” (“The righteous man shall blossom like a palm”). The Rebbe made his way to the large, round table in the middle of the dais where other leading sages were sitting, including HaGaon HaRav Malkiel Kotler, shlita, HaGaon HaRav Dovid Cohen, shlita, HaGaon HaRav Yeruchem Olshin, shlita, HaGaon HaRav Aharon Feldman, shlita, HaGaon HaRav Reuven Feinstein, shlita, the Kalever Rebbe, shlita, the Kosover Rebbe, shlita, the Skolyer Rebbe, shlita, and many others. These towering figures all rose as one and walked over to greet the Rebbe and escort him to his seat. Meanwhile, the 20,000 Jews in the audience held hands, and, with a profound sense of unity, began dancing and jumping in an indescribable, spontaneous outpouring of joy and reverence for the Torah.

Torah, Torah, and More Torah

Dry ink on paper cannot even come close to capturing the powerful emotions that were felt that night in the Prudential Center and at NJPAC, where thousands more had gathered, joined by over 100,000 worldwide via livestream. These venues, which normally host sport competitions and other entertainment events, were transformed into one giant study hall and a dazzling display kavod haTorah (respect for the Torah).

That moment, and so many others that night, truly signified the essence of Dirshu. After all, what is the essence of Dirshu, if not Torah, Torah and more Torah, led and guided by the leading sages of the generation, and unity among all the various streams – as powerfully expressed through the assembly of sages representing the many different groups of Am Yisrael to honor the outstanding accomplishments of Dirshu’s students, who have intensively studied, repeatedly reviewed, and successfully mastered the entire Talmud.

In addition to the luminaries mentioned earlier, the event was graced by the presence of HaRav Dovid Cohen, shlita, Rosh Yeshiva of the Chevron Yeshiva; HaGaon HaRav Shimon Galei, shlita; HaGaon HaRav Elya Ber Wachtfogel, shlita; and HaGaon HaRav Shlomo Feivel Schustal, shlita.

All the speakers hailed the accomplishments of the participants of Dirshu’s numerous study programs, as well as he organization itself, which has helped countless men achieve remarkable diligence and extensive knowledge. And they emphasized that Dirshu’s system of ensuring accountability in the study of Torah is the most effective antidote we have against the formidable spiritual challenges that our nation faces, especially in our generation.

This message was powerfully encapsulated by the pronouncement passionately exclaimed by Rav Dovid Hofstedter, shlita, Nasi of Dirshu: “Tonight, at this great simcha, we sound the battle cry, ‘Mi L’Hashem Eilai’” – echoing Moshe’s cry after the sin of the golden calf, “Whoever is loyal to Gd – come to me!” But whereas at that time it was the people of the tribe of Levi who gathered around Moshe, Rav Hofstedter announced that in our generation, “Vayeiasefu elav kol beneh Dirshu” – it is the Dirshu participants who have assembled to resist the sinful trends of our generation.

The overwhelming joy pulsating through the crowd in the Prudential Center and NJPAC was felt also by the participants in the special women’s event held at the Newark Symphony Hall, who celebrated their husbands’ accomplishments as well as their crucial role in enabling their husbands to reach this spectacular milestone.

The Seeds of Rav Meir Shapiro

HaGaon HaRav Shimon Galei, a prominent lecturer and Rosh Kollel from Israel, led the assemblage in the recitation of Tehillim and delivered heartfelt words of blessing to the participants.  His remarks were followed by a special video presentation featuring two of the leading Sephardic rabbis in Israel – HaGaon HaRav Shalom Cohen, shlita, Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva Porat Yosef; and HaGaon HaRav Shimon Baadani, shlita, Rosh Yeshiva of Torah VeHaim. These great leaders blessed the participants and urged all Jews across the world to raise their standards of Torah learning by joining programs that encourage review through testing.

“It is clear that Dirshu has done amazing things regarding the learning of Daf HaYomi, and all of Shas,” Rav Baadani exclaimed. “They have focused on making sure that the person learns the entire masechet in a way that it becomes his own, it belongs to him!”

Hacham Shalom Cohen cited the verse in the Book of Malachi (3:18), “Then you shall again discern between the righteous and the wicked, between he who serves Gd and he who does not serve Him.” The Gemara (Hagigah 9b) explains that the terms “righteous” and “he who serves Gd” in this verse both refer to pious people who study Torah – but there is a distinction between the two.  One refers to a student who reviews the material 100 times, and the other refers to somebody who reviews the material 101 times. This means, the Hacham noted, that even if one reviewed 100 times, it is only when he reviews the material yet again that he earns the special distinction of being called a “servant of Gd.”

“This is what Dirshu is trying to do!” Hacham Shalom said, adding, “I want to bless everyone that they all become ovdeh Elokim – people who truly serve Hashem!”

Meanwhile, at NJPAC, ma’ariv was led by the Skulener Rebbe, shlita, of Lakewood. This was followed by inspiring addresses from Rav Yitzchok Zalman Gips, shlita, Rav of Khal Birchas Avrohom; and Rav Dovid Olewski, shlita, Rosh Yeshiva of Ger, Boro Park.

At Prudential, the participants were treated to a moving speech by HaGaon HaRav Aharon Toisig, shlita, Mashgiach at the Alexander Yeshiva of Bnei Brak, who traveled from Israel especially for the event. He reflected on the extraordinary figure of Rav Meir Shapiro, the founder of the Daf Yomi learning program:

Rav Meir Shapiro, the founder of Daf HaYomi, came to America in the 1920s to raise funds to build his ‘baby,’ Yeshivas Chachmei Lublin. He had a very hard time raising funds and, after spending more than a year in America, returned to Europe very disheartened. Imagine the nachas [pride] he would have to see that the Daf HaYomi has been so successful, and so many thousands are learning and being tested on Shas, due to the seeds that he planted!

Rav Dovid Cohen explained why the joy of a Dirshu siyum is so special:

“When I come to a siyum such as this, I feel that it is something special and unique. Any siyum haShas is a tremendous simcha [joyful celebration]. We should not minimize the completion of Shas by anyone. Nevertheless, when a person doesn’t just learn Shas, but reviews it over and over again, that is the ultimate siyum. Dirshu makes such siyumim. Dirshu Yidden [Jews] not only learn Shas, they know Shas!”

The Rosh Yeshiva of Lakewood, Rav Yeruchem Olshin, told the audience that Dirshu provides an antidote to the unique dangers of our current exile:

“We are living in difficult times. Anti-Semitism…has come to locales where it wasn’t so strong until now, such as Jersey City, Monsey and others… There is the spiritual exile, as well. Rav Elchonon Wasserman wrote that the reason for all travails that Klal Yisrael [the Jewish Nation] is undergoing is forgetting the Torah… Dirshu is preserving Klal Yisrael in this exile by giving us the great weapon and shield to combat the forgetting of Torah!”

Rav Yeruchem then addressed the wives of the Dirshu participants, noting that before the giving of the Torah at Mount Sinai, Gd instructed Moshe to first speak to the women about their obligations, before speaking to the men. Rabbenu Yonah, in an essay he wrote especially for women (printed in his famous work, Iggeret Hateshuvah), explains that Moshe was to speak to the women first because men are successful in Torah study as a result of the modesty of the women. Their fierce love of Torah, Rav Olshin said, “is the power behind their husbands and empowers their husbands and children to learn.”

Chairman Rabbi Leibish Lish related a story which occurred that very morning in the school where he teaches. He saw a boy come to school with a white shirt, a shirt worn on festive occasions such as Rosh Chodesh, and he asked the boy why he was wearing a white shirt.

“My father does Dirshu,” the boy explained.

Rabbi Lish smiled and replied, “Dirshu is not what you ‘do’ – it is what you ‘are.’ Your father is a Dirshu Yid [Jew], your mother is a Dirshu Yiddeneh [Jewess], and you are part of the Dirshu family!’”

“There is Only One Solution”

A palpable feeling of awe and reverence filled the air as the Sanzer Rebbe slowly made his way to the podium. He spoke to the crowd with obvious love and passion, and the audience listened attentively, latching onto his every word.

The Rebbe said that his father frequently cited the Sages’ remark that Jews will be redeemed through the merit of Torah study, and he then emphasized how desperately the Jewish People need redemption.

“The situation that Klal Yisrael is facing today throughout the world is terrible. In the Land of Israel, different nations want to devour us. Outside the land, it is not much better. It has even reached American shores. Even worse is the spiritual exile. Our youth are being destroyed by the filth of the street that is infiltrating in various ways…

“There is only one solution, only one cure – Torah learning… Yes, in our generation, there is so much impurity, but there is also Dirshu!”

HaGaon HaRav Reuven Feinstein, shlita, Rosh Yeshiva of the Yeshiva of Staten Island, was then honored with reciting the traditional Hadran text, marking the completion of the entire Shas.

The kaddish following the siyum was recited by HaGaon HaRav Aryeh Malkiel Kotler, shlita, Rosh Yeshiva of Beth Medrash Govoha, Lakewood.

“It Is as If We Are in Gan Eden!”

Over at NJPAC, HaGaon HaRav Shlomo Feivel Schustal, shlita, Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva Tiferes Yerachmiel, discussed the special significance of participating in a siyum. He cited the teaching of Rav Chaim of Volozhin, in his famous work Nefesh Hachaim, that anytime one performs a mitzvah, he creates great sanctity in the heavens, which brings him Gd’s special assistance. This is especially so upon the completion of a mitzvah, at which point the person is enveloped by holiness, raising him to an exalted spiritual level. The Nefesh Hachaim says that this experience resembles life in Gan Eden.

“Now,” Rav Schustal passionately cried, “when we are all here at the completion of this great mitzvah of completing Shas, it is as if we are in Gan Eden!”

The Hadran at NJPAC was made by HaGaon HaRav Moshe Mordechai Lowy, shlita, Rav of Agudas Yisrael, Toronto. HaGaon HaRav Shlomo Miller, shlita, Rosh Kollel Avreichim of Toronto, recited the kaddish.

The Skverer Dayan, HaGaon HaRav Yechiel Steinmetz, shlita, was honored with beginning the new cycle of Shas with the learning of the beginning of Masechet Berachot, the first tractate of the Talmud.

Tasting the Sweetness

At the Prudential Center, Rabbi Lish introduced the Nasi of Dirshu, Rav Dovid Hofstedter, who spoke of the challenge of experiencing the unparalleled joy and “sweetness” of Torah study. Rav Hofstedter drew upon the story told in the Book of Shemot of when Beneh Yisrael arrived in Marah, and were unable to drink the water at that location, because it tasted bitter. The Nsai noted the profound significance of this story for us, and our approach to Torah study.

“The Midrash says that they couldn’t taste sweetness in the water because their deeds were bitter. The only way to cure such bitterness is through putting something sweet into the water, by immersing themselves in the sweet waters of Torah.

“In some way, we are all like that. When we start learning Torah on a low level, we often cannot taste the sweetness of Torah. Through our ameilus [exertion], we elevate ourselves so we can taste the increasing sweetness of the water of Torah.

“In our generation, there are so many tools to clarify and elucidate the Torah. The tools may have changed, but…the ultimate purpose of learning is and has always been ameilus, yegias haTorah [toiling in Torah] and kabbalas ol Torah [accepting the yoke of Torah]. If we use these tools just to make our lives easier, we won’t taste those sweet waters.

“Are we going to be satisfied with superficial learning, with superficial lives, with bitter waters? Or will we strive to plumb the depths and transform them into sweet waters?!

“We are being attacked in many ways. Everything that is good and right, dignified, virtuous and proper is under attack. Yiddishkeit [Judaism] and Torah are under attack. We are at war. but we must fight back…

“Let us accept upon ourselves more Torah, more siyumim, more chiddushim [novel insights], more kavod haTorah [respect for Torah] and kavod haShechinah [respect for Gd]!”

The formal “kabbalat ol malkhut Shamayim” – proclamation of commitment to Gd’s Kingship – was led by the Vizhnitzer Rebbe, shlita, of Monsey, and was followed by a beautiful musical interlude in festive celebration of this momentous occasion.

HaGaon HaRav Elya Ber Wachtfogel, shlita, was honored with starting the new cycle of Shas study. He began by saying, “When a person constantly reviews vast amounts of Torah, it becomes his essence. That is what learning with Dirshu does. Superficial learning of a page of Gemara does not give you that koach [strength]. But learning and reviewing with accountability can enable everyone to know the entire Torah!”

As the music began to play with all the various singers and bands joining together in unbridled unity, the entire assemblage erupted in song and dance. The Torah sages at the dais held hands and danced together, and all those who had completed the Shas were invited down to the floor of the Prudential Center to dance with them.

As the circle went around and around, the feelings of joy, of true Torah accomplishment, were simply indescribable. It was the special, unparalleled joy of Torah – a feeling which nobody who experienced it that night will ever forget.

 

Special Commemorative Section Thirteenth Siyum Hashas

INSIDE

100,000 Strong: Unity, Joy, and Pride at the 13th Siyum HaShas

Rabbi Yehuda Beyda

A Woman’s Perspective on the Siyum HaShas

Esther P.

Memorable Moments

Classic photos of this monumental event

Spotlight on Security Detail at the Siyum HaShas

Frieda Schweky

SIYUMIN AROUND THE NATION

Yehoshua Ben Yosef

 

 

 

The Trump 2019 Report Card

DAVE GORDON

This year we face critical  presidential elections, with so much at stake. Tensions are high regarding Iran, anti-Semitic incidents in the U.S. are alarmingly on the rise, violence and terror threaten our allies abroad, and economic stability continues to be a concern.

President Donald Trump has addressed these issues, and many more. As the Presidential election grows closer, his accomplishments and failings will be scrutinized. Let’s take a look at some of the highlights of the Trump administration in 2019.

The Economy

The upturn in the economy has been a feather in Trump’s hat since the beginning of his presidency. Just weeks after his election, the stock market went up, and economic indices showed consumer and corporate confidence at an all-time high. This trend has continued, virtually unabated, for the past three years.

The unemployment rate is still the lowest it has been in 50 years, at three and a half per cent, and  job growth is up, with an impressive 200,000 more jobs on the market per month. Wage increases are also on the rise at more than three percent growth for the first time in more than 10 years. Household income has also risen steadily since the last year of the Obama administration, with the average middle-class family income reaching $63,179.

Meanwhile, Trump has offered economic assistance to disabled vets, with an executive order to forgive their student loans. Though this initiative had existed previously, Trump removed many of the roadblocks and complications involved in making this assistance readily available. 24,000 veterans will be affected in 2020 alone.

Environmental Initiatives

Big surprises for Trump critics included numerous environmental initiatives in 2019. A major public lands and conservation bill was signed into law. The bill, which is the most sweeping Congress has considered regarding public lands in over a decade, not only adds 1.3 million acres of wilderness to protected lands, but it also reauthorizes the Land and Water Conservation Fund.

To reduce overspending and maintain accountability, The Environmental Protection Agency received an additional mandate to ensure that its regulatory decisions are rooted in sound, transparent, and consistent approaches to evaluating benefits and costs.

Trump’s detractors may criticize him for not investing in green energy. However, they might do well to consider the president’s  reticence to do so after President Obama left in his wake $50 billion spent on 34 projects that barely produced a kilowatt of energy. Instead, Trump increased the budget to support nuclear energy, with $3.7 billion provided in new loans, earmarked to help complete two new commercial reactors over the course of a decade.

Fighting Terror

In the last days of 2019, Trump ordered the killing of arch terrorist Major General Qassem Soleimani, Iran’s powerful military commander. The U.S. Department of Defense revealed that Soleimani was actively developing plans to attack American diplomats and service members in Iraq and throughout the region. Soleimani oversaw funding, training, and equipping of Iraqi Shi’ite militias, the Taliban, and the Houthis in Yemen. Under his leadership, thousands of operatives were trained in groups such as Hezbollah, Hamas, and Palestinian Jihad. Killed along with Soleimani was Abu Mahdi al-Mohandes, an Iraqi politician and military commander. He was deputy chief of the Popular Mobilization Committee, a group of pro-Iranian paramilitaries in Iraq. He was killed together with Soleimani on a road leading to the Baghdad International Airport.

The Trump doctrine has always been to fight fire with fire, and that’s what he has done with those who threaten the US and her allies. The White House launched airstrikes against Iranian allies in Iraq and Syria, to cite one example. Five locations were targeted, which included weapons and munitions depots linked to Iran. It is believed the weapons had been used in recent attacks against coalition fighters – including an attack which caused the death of an American contractor.

The President also ordered the operation that killed ISIS leader Al-Baghdadi. Known leader of ISIS since 2010, Al-Baghdadi brought the terrorist organization into prominence in the region, taking advantage of regional power vacuums. Trump ordered a Special Operations raid that ended in al-Baghdadi blowing himself up.

Fighting evil must be done collaboratively, not only with boots on the ground, but also with resources. That is why Trump has made it clear that his partners and allies must do their fair share. Last year, Trump negotiated with our NATO allies to pay more for collective security, to the tune of $130 million. The ultimate goal is that all members pay the benchmark of at least two percent of the GDP (Gross Domestic Product) to the cause. The United States currently pays 3.42% of its GDP.

Foreign Policy

On the topic of foreign relations, Trump continues to develop détente with North Korea, in the hopes of influencing the hermit kingdom to pare down its nuclear program and to ease its relentless iron clutch on its citizens. Though no agreement was reached at the Hanoi, Vietnam summit between Kim Jung-Un and Trump, many hailed it as a historic meeting.

South of the border, an immigration deal was signed with Mexico, in an effort to push Mexico to do more to stem the flow of undocumented immigrants from Central America. Trump, always a tough negotiator, threatened five percent tariffs on all Mexican imports. That threat seemingly paid off when Mexico came to the table and agreed to strengthen their own northern border. When the Mexicans  agreed to Trump’s terms, Trump rescinded the proposed tariff.

Then there’s Israel. Known for his philosemitic views and deep affinity for the Jewish State, 2019 was the year that the Trump administration recognized the Golan Heights as part of Israel. This was the first time a U.S. President had officially took such a goodwill stance. In addition, and probably more significant, 2019 was the year that Secretary of State Mike Pompeo declared that Jewish settlements in the West Bank (Judea and Samaria) “are not illegal per se,” a departure of decades-old U.S. State Department policy.

In other Jewish related items, Trump signed an order to address antisemitism on college campuses.

Specifically relating to campuses that have been openly hostile to Jewish student groups and Israel, the order would strip federal funding from universities deemed to be promoting  a climate of intolerance for minority students. It reminds universities that their Jewish and Israeli students are vulnerable minorities who need protection.

Health & Safety

Trump signed an Executive Order expanding private benefits under Medicare. Dubbed the Medicare Advantage – the private option of the Medicare program – its goal is to provide lower costs, and health savings plans. The administration believes this will get even more seniors enrolled in Medicare Advantage, a step towards the promotion of private healthcare for seniors. It’s an initiative that is intended to improve the quality and length of life for seniors.

Trump signed another executive order intended to save lives: banning bump stocks. Bump stocks allow a shooter to shoot several rounds in rapid succession. Spurred by the deadly Las Vegas shooting in 2017, the order went into effect in March of 2019.

Court Judges

And finally, Trump-appointed judges will set in motion rulings that will preserve conservative values for some time to come, far beyond the Trump presidency. Trump has appointed 172 federal judges, including Supreme Court justices Neil Gorsuch and Brett Kavanaugh, 48 Appeals Court judges, and 120 District Court judges.

In Conclusion

Only after the elections will we know whether this will be Trump’s last year in office, or he will serve another four years. Despite impeachment proceedings and scrutiny from detractors, Trump ended the decade with some significant accomplishments: a new NAFTA Agreement (USMCA – United States-Mexico-Canada Agreement), Space Force (USSF, the space operations branch of the U.S. Armed Forces), appointment of a historic number of federal judges, the lowest unemployment in half a century, and a stock market that has increased by 50 percent since election day, 2016. We will all have to see how the coming year unfolds.

 

Together We Care

Mozelle Forman

The first commandment Gd gave to Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden was, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth.”  Very soon after in the book of Beresheet we encounter the issue of infertility, a real impediment to fulfilling Gd’s directive.  Sarah our Matriarch did not become a mother until the age of 90.  After years of infertility Rivka gave birth for Yaakov and Esau.  And Rachel endured years of suffering as her sister (who she shared a secret signal with that enabled her to marry Yaakov first) and their handmaidens all bore children.  The grief she experienced was most profoundly expressed when she beseeched Yaakov to pray for her saying: “Give me children – otherwise I am dead” (Beresheet 30:1).  The Torah relates that Yaakov’s response was uttered in anger. (He replied, “Am I instead of Gd Who has withheld from you fruit of the womb?”) And although there are many explanations for Yaakov’s response, our sages tell us that Hashem took Yaakov to task for his insensitivity to Rachel.

Fast forward to the year 2020 – a time when many women still suffer from the grief of infertility  as did Rachel, which is compounded by coping with the emotionally charged fertility treatments that are now available.  And still, many of us are unsure of how to speak to these women, comfort them, and encourage them.  There are many wonderful organizations, such as ATime, The Puah Institute, and Boneh Olam,  that connect women to the vital medical services they require to manage infertility.  But, until recently, there was no organization specifically addressing the emotional aspects of coping with infertility and with the medical treatments involved.

SBH Steps Up

Enter the SBH Fertility Support Program, which was created about a year and a half ago. with the mission of providing support to women undergoing fertility treatments and to their family members.  Audrey Grazi, LCSW, Director of Mental Health Resource elaborates: “It was brought to our attention by women in our community that this population was not being served.  Our goal is to focus on the emotional needs of the women with support groups, both in Brooklyn and Deal, workshops, one-on-one peer support, and yoga classes .  Our support group leaders were professionally trained, using the model of the Gefen Fertility Center in Israel, and we have trained about 50 women as peer mentors.”

As the facilitator of the support group in Deal, NJ, I can attest to the necessity and effectiveness of the groups.  The first benefit to the women is the peer support the women receive in these groups, which is vital to their wellbeing. One woman shared: “It helps me feel like I am not the only one going through this, which takes away the feeling that there is something wrong with me because I can’t have a baby.  I feel less embarrassed and ashamed about my situation.”  Secondly, the women provide reassurance and hope to one another. They discuss strategies for dealing with misguided statements and for coping with their feelings of disappointment.  And, last but not least, the women receive education and tools to cope with the anxiety inherent in this challenging life experience.

Sensitivity to Families Experiencing Infertility

On January 8, the Fertility Support Program sponsored a sensitivity event entitled “How to approach, respond to, and support your loved one through infertility and pregnancy loss.”  The speaker, Aimee Baron, MD, was formerly the Director of Innovation and Growth at Nechama Comfort as well as serving as an attending pediatrician in the newborn nursery and neo-natal intensive care unit at St. Luke’s  Roosevelt Hospital.  Dr. Baron shared some staggering statistics about infertility and pregnancy loss.  “Approximately one in eight couples are experiencing some form of infertility, and one in four pregnancies end in loss or miscarriage. One out of one hundred pregnancies end in stillbirth, which is a miscarriage that occurs after 20 or more weeks of pregnancy.  Infertility is a universal struggle to have a child – whether you’ve never had a child before or are having difficulty conceiving after you have a child already, whether you have experienced pregnancy loss, or you are considering adoption, or surrogacy.”  With the statistics this high, there’s a good chance we know someone who is or has been affected by infertility, and we need a clearer understanding of how to properly support someone who is struggling to have a child.

Dr. Baron shared her personal story to help the audience understand the emotional upheaval infertility wreaks on a couple.  She explained that there is a constant cycle of hope and disappointment in the life of a couple trying to conceive.  Doctors’ appointments, treatments, and the waiting to see if their treatment took.  When, in many cases, the pregnancy is lost, the disappointment can be crushing.  “Losing a pregnancy is an intangible loss,” Dr Baron explains.  “There are no real concrete memories of the baby that was lost, making it very hard to move on.”  But the couple must move on to the next cycle, to the next chance, to the next hope.

After her third miscarriage, Dr. Baron took a leave of absence and became an “ambassador” and support to other women facing the same challenges.  “I recognized that there were many wonderful organizations that helped couples with referrals and the medical issues associated with infertility.  But what happens when you are home alone, or in the middle of the night when you are crying because the last cycle didn’t work, or you just lost a baby?”  Dr. Baron chose Instagram as the social media platform through which she could reach the most women and founded “I was supposed to have a baby” in August 2019.  “This platform supports Jewish families who are going through infertility, pregnancy loss, infant loss, surrogacy, and adoption.  It allows couples to tell their stories and share resources with one another at any time of the day or night.”

Riddles – February 2020

Riddle: A Bumpy Ride

SUBMITTED BY: Leon M.

You have 5 kids and you have to get them all into a car. Tommy and Timmy are twins but they fight so they can’t sit together. Sarah and Sally fight too, so they can’t sit together. Max fights with his sisters so he can only sit by his brothers. There’s 5 seats side by side and you have to put them in order. How would you seat the kids, so that everyone is happy?

Last Month’s Riddle: Truck Stop

A truck is stuck under a bridge and the driver cannot get it out. A man walks by and stops to help. He easily gets the truck unstuck. How did he do it?

Solution: He let the air out of the tires!

Solved by: Saul H., Leibowitz Family, Fay Chesir, Blimi Yoffe, Mishael Lavizadeh, Eliyahu Cohen, Big Mike, and Joey Dabah.

JUNIOR RIDDLE: Cats and Mice

SUBMITTED BY: Sherry C.

If 5 cats catch 5 mice in 5 minutes, how long will it take one cat to catch a mouse?

Last Month’s Junior Riddle: Bat and Ball

A bat and a ball cost $1.10. The bat costs one dollar more than the ball. How much does the ball cost?

Solution: The ball costs 5 cents. One dollar more than 5 cents is $1.05, the sum of which is $1.10.

Solved by: Daniel Tapiro, Fay Chesir, Blimi Yoffe, Yosef and Rena Wahba, Mishael Lavizadeh, Joey Dabah, and The Shmulster.

Understanding Credit Scores

Karen Behfar

For all the new buyers that just started looking to make the move, I’ve decided to take this opportunity to go back to the basics and give you the run-down on credit scores.  This is definitely a good starting point, but of course it is not the only step involved in beginning the  process of purchasing a home.

The Basics of Credit Scores

If you’ve ever heard someone referring to their credit score and thought, “Huh?”, you’re not alone. Roughly forty percent of Americans don’t know how credit scores work. Here are the basics:

A credit score helps lenders – like banks and credit unions – decide whether you qualify for a loan, and it helps to determine the terms of the loan they can offer you. It is generated using an algorithm that examines your borrowing history, which is calculated by checking your credit reports. Every time you take out a loan, your lender reports the activity to a credit bureau, which then compiles it into a credit report.

Although there are multiple types of credit scores, the most popular score is the FICO score, which is the standard for home and car loans. Your FICO score will range from 300 to 850, incorporating the following components:

  • Payment history, including missed payments and defaulted on loans (35%)
  • Current debt, including how much you presently owe (30%)
  • Length of credit, including your full borrowing history (15%)
  • New credit, including any loans you’ve applied for recently (10%)
  • Types of credit, including all your existing types of debt (10%)

Since your payment history and current debt make up more than sixty percent of your score, they are the two most important elements. The best way to do well in these areas is to make all of your payments on time, and ensure that most of your available credit is unused.

As a rule of thumb, credit scores considered “good” typically fall between 670 and 740. Anything above 800 is considered to be exceptional, and anything below 580 is considered to be poor.

An annual free credit report is available to all U.S. consumers under federal law, and many banks provide free credit scores. It’s important to check your credit score regularly, so if you’re unsure about what your credit score is, make an appointment to discuss it with someone at your financial institution.

Home Equity Line of Credit

Let’s talk about another very important part of the home buying process – loans.  More specifically, a HELOC (Home Equity Line of Credit).  To break it down in short, if a homeowner bought their house a few years ago for $400,000 and it’s currently worth $1.2M – this is the equity in their home.  Obviously, it goes against your home and there is a monthly payment.

The Basics of HELOC Loans

 If you’re thinking about taking out a loan for something major – you might want to consider a home equity line of credit. With a HELOC you can use the equity from your house as collateral, similar to a second mortgage.

Unlike a traditional home equity loan, with a HELOC you won’t be advanced the entire loan upfront; instead, you’ll be given a line of credit to borrow against with a set credit limit. Your HELOC will also have a set “draw period” during which you can borrow funds. You will be required to repay the amount you’ve withdrawn, plus interest, by the end of your draw period.

One of the main benefits of a HELOC loan is that the interest paid can often be deducted under state income tax laws. However, it’s important to remember that the interest rate on a HELOC is typically variable and is based on an index, so it may change over time.

A HELOC also offers more flexibility than a traditional home equity loan because it allows you to repay on your own schedule. You can pay back your loan using the minimum repayment amount over the course of your entire draw period, or you can repay the entire sum plus interest in a single payment if you prefer.

If you’d like to change the rate, payment, or term on your HELOC, it is possible to refinance. You may be able to replace your existing HELOC with a new one, or merge your HELOC with a first mortgage to take advantage of lower interest rates. You can also take out a second HELOC, which will reset your interest-only draw period and keep your monthly payments low. This can be a slippery slope though, so it’s best to consult with your financial advisor first.

Positive Perceptions

Tammy Sassoon, M.S. ED

Parents often ask how to “get” their children to be kinder, more responsible, or more of anything, for that matter. The problem with this question is that if your children feel that you are trying to “get” them to act a certain way they will feel like you are trying to control them.

Imagine a mother who learns that if you empathize with your children in times of intense feelings, children often calm down. So, the next time her son is crying, she says, “Oh that must be so hard for you,” and she is secretly hoping that he quiets down already. Then she wonders why it didn’t “work.” The answer is that the child felt controlled. Kids feel our vibes and her son knew that she wasn’t really emotionally with him. Her intent was to quiet him down.

In any relationship we lose sight of closeness when we search for conditions.

Children Need Proper Guidance

There is nothing wrong with our children, except our own perceptions. We do not have to do anything to make our children good kids. They already are!

Was there ever a time when you thought otherwise? I know I used to think that my children were problematic when they acted in certain ways. When I let go of all that unhelpful thinking, I started to see that every child on the planet is an amazingly valuable human being. I don’t have to have them act a certain way in order to see that. Obviously, as a responsible parent, I have to guide them, but I don’t need any conditions any more to see them for who they are. I don’t judge them when they make mistakes because that’s just a part of the human experience. And ironically, if kids feel that we believe mistakes are a big problem, so do they, and in turn that makes them suffer from feelings of low self-worth, causes them to fear mistakes, and creates a disconnect between us and them.

So now the question is, when your kids act up how do you guide them in a way that shows that you don’t think one drop less of them just because they made a mistake?

I will present you with several ideas:

1. Firstly, don’t even bring up things that are isolated incidents. It’s just plain annoying at best, and counterproductive at worst.
2. Make sure you are modeling whatever behavior you want your children to adopt. If you are trying to raise children who are happy with whatever comes their way, make sure you show them how you embrace the challenges in your own life. If you want them to value kindness, make sure they see how sweet and considerate you are to others.
3. Let them know the benefits of whatever you would like them to do. For example, people who try to solve problems in ways that are good for themselves and the other party are actually happier in the end. People who only care about themselves do not lead lives that are as happy and fulfilling.
4. For repeated infractions have the “I know you don’t mean to…” conversation. Here’s how it goes:
● “I know you don’t mean to be hurtful. When you____it makes____feel like you think they are not important. And I know you’d never want to do that.”
● “Can you please try your best to pay attention to not doing____?”
● If it happens again say, “What happened?”( not in a judgmental way, but in an accountable way, even with a smile) if the child says they forgot, say, “That’s okay, everyone forgets sometimes, now please go and___.”

What behaviors make you forget your kids’ true value? Mine is the fighting between them. So, when they fight, I try to remember the gift of life, and I remember holding them in my arms when they were newly born. Same person. New challenges. Same gift. Same life. That memory reminds me of their real true unchanging value and helps me speak to them in ways that demonstrate just that.  ⠀