The Case 

A Back-to-School Blunder 

During the summer, Solomon borrowed $400 from his good friend and was unable to return the outstanding loan until after the summer. As a schoolteacher, Solomon received his first paycheck at the start of the back-to-school season. Anxious to return the loan, he handed the $400 cash he owed to a ten-year-old student and asked him to deliver it to the lender. Solomon was confident that the ten-year-old would safely deliver the cash to the lender, since the lender resided next door to the young boy’s home. But when the ten-year-old arrived home and told his mother of the cash he was carrying, she immediately confiscated the money and was appalled by Solomon’s reckless behavior. She then placed the money on top of the piano adjacent to the entrance of the home. A short while later, a delivery boy from a local grocer who was dropping off groceries entered the home, and evidently made off with the $400. The lady of the home notified Solomon of the unfortunate turn of events and chastised him for his reckless conduct. Solomon acknowledged that he acted unwisely, but claimed that had she not intervened, the money would have surely reached the next-door neighbor. Unwilling to compensate Solomon for the lost funds, and unable to find the delivery boy for collection, the matter was presented to Bet Din to resolve.  

How should the Bet Din rule?  Is Solomon entitled to compensation or not, and why? 

Torah Law 

According to the ruling of the Shulhan Aruch, a person entrusted with an item to safeguard is liable in case of theft if he had left the item unattended. Even if the third party who was left alone with the item is not a suspicious character, and has no prior criminal record, nevertheless, it is considered negligence, and the custodian is liable. Unpaid custodians are generally exempt in case of theft, but if the item was lost or stolen due to a custodian’s negligence, he bears liability and must reimburse the owner for the loss. This ruling applies even if it is never proven that the third party who was allowed unattended access to the item was, in fact, the thief. Unless the custodian can prove that there is no link between the third party’s access and the subsequent disappearance of the item, he is held accountable for negligently leaving the item unattended. 

These guidelines apply only to a custodian who agrees to safeguard an item. However, in instances where one obtains an item belonging to another through a minor, the degree of responsibility may vary. Certainly, one who destroys or damages an item received from a minor is liable for his destructive actions, but many authorities exempt an offender in instances of mere negligence. Since the owner handed over the item to a minor, it may be assumed that he implicitly relinquished all claims of negligence affected by another. Although the negligent party took the item from the minor’s possession, he does not automatically assume responsibility as a custodian. By willingly entrusting the item to a minor, the owner himself can be said to have already compromised the safety of the item.  So even if the item was intercepted and subsequently lost by another, since the item may have already had a status of misplacement from the onset, the intercepting party can be exempted from liability. 

However, several halachic authorities dispute this ruling and maintain that one who intercepts an item from a minor assumes the status of an unpaid custodian. Since the item may have likely been protected by the minor and ultimately returned to its owner, one who interferes with that process bears liability in cases of negligence.  

Generally, when faced with a case subject to two conflicting views among the halachic authorities, a Bet Din will not issue a judgment for payment. Since there are halachic opinions to rely on, a defendant has the legal right to withhold payment.  

As a side note, in instances where a third party takes an item entrusted to a minor, and afterwards returns it to the minor, he is not liable if the item is subsequently lost. Since the owner himself placed it in the custody of a minor, it is legally acceptable to return it to that same minor. 

Sources: Baba Batra 88a, Shulhan Aruch 188:2, Rabbenu Yonah to Baba Batra 87b, Nimukei Yosef, Netivot  Hamishpat 261:2, Mishpat Shelomoh 3:14, Divrei Mishpat 261:4, Aruch Hashulhan 261:4.  

VERDICT: A Teacher’s Folly 

The Bet Din did not require the mother to pay Solomon the $400, since, as discussed, according to several halachic authorities, one who intercepts and then misplaces an item entrusted to a minor is exempt from liability. Although the mother was most definitely negligent by allowing a stranger access to the money she intercepted, nevertheless, she never explicitly accepted responsibility and according to several opinions she is exempt from payment. 

This ruling was because Solomon gave the money to a minor, thereby implicitly relinquishing claims of negligence affected by the mother. By depositing the money with a minor, he is considered as having partially abandoned the funds and cannot later demand compensation for its subsequent loss due simply to negligence. In essence, he is the one who bears initial accountability for carelessness.

In Loving Memory of Vera Bat Carol, A”H 

YOU BE THE JUDGE 

The Wrath of Milton 

Stanley, a jobber, regularly buys and sells varied merchandise at a small profit. Upon striking a deal to purchase from Harry $7,000 worth of goods, the two agreed that the sale would be on consignment. Stanley stored the merchandise in his private garage, which was protected by a surveillance camera and a sophisticated alarm system. But when Hurricane Milton swept across the Southeast Coast, a tree fell on the garage, starting an electrical fire that caused permanent damage to the merchandise. Stanley immediately notified Harry of the unfortunate turn of events and told him that he had no intention of paying for the goods since they were bought on consignment. Harry did not respond to Stanley but rather summoned him to Bet Din claiming $7,000 in compensation for the lost merchandise. In Bet Din, Stanley explained that although the merchandise was lost while in his domain, by definition of consignment, Harry had retained ownership of the goods until they were sold. Since Harry was the owner of the merchandise, he is to sustain the loss. Harry defended his claim stating simply that while Stanley maintained the right to return the merchandise at any time, if he fails to return the goods for any reason, he is liable for payment.  

How should the Bet Din rule – in favor of Stanley or Harry, and why? 

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas 

Sara gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby boy. She was excited that her brother Yosef, a mohel, arranged to fly in from Israel to New York and had agreed to perform the brit mila for his new little nephew. Yosef arrived the day before the brit mila was to take place.  

He looked at the baby and shook his head. “Sara, Mabrouk! But the baby is yellow and I cannot perform the brit mila unless the color clears up by tomorrow.” Sara responded, “But the baby is healthy!” She called her doctor to confirm that the baby was, indeed, perfectly healthy. Dr. Walter Smith had checked the baby and reiterated that  he was, indeed, perfectly healthy.  

When Yosef told Dr. Smith that it was possible to treat jaundice with doves, the doctor was incredulous. “Using doves to heal jaundice?!” he responded. “Is there scientific evidence to support this?!”  

According to Jewish tradition, the “pigeon treatment” has been employed successfully for generations. 

When a Baby Is “Yarok” 

Physiological jaundice in a newborn is not usually considered a medical risk even if the baby has a yellowish appearance. However, the Gemara (Shabbat 134a) notes that a sick child should not undergo a brit mila until he recovers and this includes if a baby is “yarok,” meaning he has a greenish or yellowish appearance. Such a baby should not have a brit mila until he loses the “yarok” complexion. Even though there may not be any medical reason to delay the brit mila, the Rambam (Mila 1:17) and Shulchan Aruch (YD 263:1) rule that one may not perform a brit mila on a baby who is “yarok.” 

The Dove Treatment  

Hacham Ovadia, zt”l, has a responsa (Yabia Omer YD, 9:32) discussing the halachic implications of the healing power of doves in treating jaundice. He quotes a segula from Taamei Haminhagim, where the treatment for curing jaundice (often seen in hepatitis patients) is to place a male pigeon on the navel of a male, or a female pigeon on the navel of a female. Hacham Ovadia, also notes anecdotal evidence of cases in which the pigeon dies and the patient is healed. The claim is that the pigeon draws the jaundice out from the patient, thus eliminating the jaundice. Dr. Walter saw no medical need or benefit to do this ancient “treatment” and even claimed that it should qualify as animal cruelty. 

Hacham Ovadia acknowledges that the doctors question this form of intervention and understands that it may not cure all patients from jaundice. However, Hacham Ovadia recognizes that many patients have been cured this way. 

Rulings of Hacham Ovadia and the Rambam  

Hacham Ovadia further explains that in this instance there is no concern of animal cruelty – tzaar baalei haim, even though this procedure causes the death of the doves. While there are many sources that argue that tzaar baalei haim is a Biblical prohibition according to most poskim, this prohibition is waived when the action is necessary for human benefit. In other words, tzaar baalei haim does not apply when there is human gain. Hacham Ovadia applies this concept to using doves as a segula for health reasons, even if there is no scientific explanation for the phenomena. 

In a different responsa, Hacham Ovadia (Yabia Omer OC, 8:37) discusses using a segula as a treatment for an illness that involves hilul Shabbat. When quoting different opinions among the poskim whether this is permitted, he elaborates on the Rambam’s position. In his Pirush Hamishna (Yuma 8:6), the Rambam explains that you may not use a segula that involves a prohibition unless it is has a proven medical efficacy. In Moreh Nevuchim (3:37) the Rambam explains that the we do find Hazal using segulot that cannot be explained scientifically, but as long as experience demonstrates their efficacy, they may still be used. Therefore, even though using doves to treat jaundice qualifies as segula without scientific basis, Hacham Ovadia writes that it works and it is permissible to use this treatment.  

Hacham Ovadia is confident that regardless of the Rambam’s position vis-à-vis segulot, the Rambam would still permit using doves to cure jaundice as he (the Rambam) rules that tzaar baalei haim is only a rabbinic prohibition and should be permissibly violated for human benefit. 

Conclusion 

In conclusion, a brit mila may not be performed on a baby who is “yarok.” But since there is no medical illness, the brit mila may be performed as soon as the baby loses his “yarok” complexion. The Rishon Lezion, Hacham Yitzhak Yosef, explains (Sova Semahot 2:16:3) that even though we must usually wait a full seven days for a baby to recover from an illness, since physiological jaundice is not considered a classic medical illness, one does not need to wait seven days in this instance. He also rules that it is permissible to use doves to try to cure the jaundice. 

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer, and author on Medical Halacha. He heads the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. His latest book is “Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome.” To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com. 

Linda Sadacka 

Just over a year ago, Israel teetered on the edge of civil war, deeply divided over the judicial reform advanced by the government. The proposed changes to the method of appointing Israel’s Supreme Court, and the extent of its authority, ignited a firestorm that fractured Israeli society and sent shockwaves through Jewish communities worldwide. The unity that once bound us together seemed fragile, frayed by political discord; the solidarity that had once defined our people felt distant and almost out of reach. 

Then, on October 7, 2023, Israel faced its darkest day since the Holocaust. Nearly 1,200 innocent lives were brutally taken, and some 250 hostages were dragged into captivity. The grief was unbearable, and plunged our entire nation into deep mourning. But from this unimaginable tragedy, something extraordinary began to emerge. Jews from all corners of the globe came together in an unprecedented show of unity to support Israel’s military and civilian efforts. This response not only showed resilience, but signified a rekindling of our shared faith, our collective spirit, and our deep-seated connection to one another.  

Unity & Victory 

This newfound ahdut (unity) did more than strengthen us spiritually; it also led to tangible victories. A prime example is a meticulously executed military operation targeting Hezbollah. Thousands of pagers and walkie-talkies across Lebanon were detonated, killing 37 Hezbollah operatives and injuring over 3,000, effectively crippling their communication network. The assassination of Hassan Nasrallah, Hezbollah’s leader for over 32 years, marked a strategic turning point in Israel’s war against Hezbollah, which, backed by Iranian funding, has for decades posed a persistent threat to Israel, and has been launching rockets into northern Israel this entire past year. The dramatic assassination came amid the Israeli air force’s relentless bombing of Hezbollah ammunition depots, rocket launchers, and other assets, significantly weakening the terror organization’s capabilities. These achievements  are the result of not only the country’s outstanding military and intelligence apparatuses, but also our collective commitment to Torah, hesed (kindness), and unity.  

Supporting Our Troops 

While Israel’s courageous, selfless soldiers have fought valiantly on the front lines, Jewish communities in the Diaspora have rallied with remarkable determination. One notable effort was led by the Sephardic Heritage Museum, which played a critical role in supporting soldiers and those displaced by the conflict. Through their dedicated efforts, 270 family members were reunited, and essential supplies – such as food and warm clothing – were provided to those in need. Spearheaded by community leaders including Harry Adjmi, David Azar, Morris Missry, Tzvi Benchaim, Mark Adjmi, and Elliot Sutton, this work exemplified world Jewry’s generosity and mutual devotion. 

An inspiring example of the combination of Israeli resilience and our community’s generosity is Elad and Nava from the Drimia Winery, located in the town of Susiya in southern Judea. While Elad, an elite combat soldier, was deployed in Gaza, his wife, Nava, managed their farm and winery on her own. A number of our community leaders, including Daniel and Eileen Benun, rallied around them, organizing campaigns to support the winery, receiving an overwhelming response. Over 400 packages of Drimia wine were sold, with all proceeds going to support Elad and Nava during these trying times. This outpouring of support wasn’t just a gesture – it was a testament to the enduring unity of the Jewish people, both at home and on the front lines.  

Support for the military effort has come even from communities that traditionally don’t serve in the army. The haredi communities – both Hassidic and Lithuanian – have mobilized to aid their brothers fighting on the front lines. Massive amounts of food are being delivered daily to soldiers along the Gaza border, ensuring that the troops are well-fed and cared for. This extraordinary effort from the ultra-Orthodox community reflects the deep commitment to unity that transcends religious and ideological differences.  

While military and logistical support has been vital, another effort focuses on healing the emotional scars left by war. Maurice and Gail Setton, who are deeply involved with the Peace of Mind organization which helps IDF soldiers who experience trauma by providing therapy, have stepped up to meet the growing need, as a large number of soldiers struggle with the psychological effects of combat. The program culminates with a visit to a welcoming Diaspora community where soldiers receive intensive therapy, supported by host families. Eleven families in Deal, NJ, graciously welcomed soldiers into their homes, forming lasting bonds that continue long after the brief visit. The relationships forged through this initiative offer a lifetime of invaluable connection, healing, and support. 

Deepening Our Connection  

Community leaders such as Sammy Saka, Harry Adjmi, Jack Srour, Zvi Ben Haim, Isaac Massry, Jason Gindi, and Joey Sitt have also stepped forward, spearheading an initiative to develop a dedicated residential sector for our community in Jerusalem. In a time when deepening our connection to the land of Israel is more urgent than ever, this initiative represents a bold, forward-thinking approach to ensuring that the Jewish people remain united with their homeland, no matter what global challenges may arise. 

In yeshivot, such as Areret Torah, teachers and institutions have responded to the call for unity by mandating daily prayers for Israel. Students are led in heartfelt prayers beseeching Gd for the safety and success of our beloved IDF soldiers, and the return of our hostages. This collective act of faith, encouraged by educators, reverberates throughout Jewish communities around the world, uniting us in prayer for Israel’s safety, strength, and ultimate redemption.  

My own organization, Chasdei David, a registered 501(c)(3) powered entirely by volunteers, partnered with Rabbi Yitzchak David Grossman’s Migdal Ohr institution to distribute tefillin to IDF soldiers. Rabbi Grossman personally travels from base to base, providing warm meals and distributing “shaliach mitzvah” coins, encouraging soldiers to give charity after their service. His efforts have yielded miraculous results, with entire groups of soldiers surviving direct hits during battle in this merit. His work in Bikur Cholim, using a coin from the Lelover Rebbe, has also brought about open miracles, healing soldiers who had been given little hope. What stands out most is how many of these soldiers, who previously had little interest in Torah or mitzvot, now thirst for a spiritual connection. The horrors of October 7 sparked a deep desire within them to reconnect with their heritage and with Hashem. We stand ready to support their spiritual growth and help them strengthen their faith.  

The Jewish World Unites 

Of course, our communities are not the only ones who have opened their hearts to our brothers and sisters across the ocean. Throughout the Diaspora, Jewish groups have shown extraordinary solidarity. The MetroWest Israel Action Committee, led by Moshe Glick, organized a massive rally in Livingston, New Jersey, where over 6,000 people gathered to support Israel and demand the release of hostages held by Hamas. A towering nine-foot-tall milk carton displaying the faces of the hostages became a powerful symbol, turning the conversation from political discourse into a deeply emotional humanitarian plea: “Let Them Go.” Glick’s leadership helped refocus the narrative on what truly matters – bringing our people home.  

At Yeshiva University, events like the Evening of Unity, Solidarity, and Story were held, bringing together survivors, community leaders, and students to honor the memory of those lost on October 7. These gatherings provided both spiritual connection and practical aid, reinforcing the Jewish community’s resolve to stand by Israel in its time of need. 

In yet another extraordinary effort, Veronique from Great Neck led an initiative that has provided 650 meals daily for soldiers, hosted barbecues at the borders, donated tents serving as makeshift shuls and offices, and even sent cheesecakes for Shavuot and flowers for Shabbat. Veronique’s work is a shining example of the extraordinary lengths to which Jewish communities around the world have gone to support those on the front lines. 

Beyond these grassroots efforts, countless organizations and individuals have fought tirelessly to safeguard the truth of the October 7 massacre in the face of rampant misinformation. These advocates have been instrumental in ensuring that the voices of victims and hostages remain heard, and combating false narratives that seek to deny or downplay the atrocities committed on that day.  

What we are witnessing is not merely resilience, but a resurgence of national spirit rooted in unity. Whether we wear black hats, velvet kippot, shtreimels, or none at all, our strength as a people comes from standing together. This unity, transcending appearances and ideological differences, is the key to our success as a nation. As we move forward, this shared commitment to each other, our faith, and our homeland will guide us through these challenging times and lead us, please Gd, to our ultimate redemption. 

Linda Sadacka is a prominent political activist and community leader, renowned for her influential social media platform @lindaadvocate.

Ellen Geller Kamaras 

It is extremely painful for us to process that the Israel-Hamas war has continued for over a year.   

One year ago, the most horrific massacre since the Holocaust occurred to the Jewish people.   We all prayed that Hamas would release the hostages long before this anniversary. We could not fathom they would not be home more than one full year later. 

Due to security concerns, many of the October 7th commemoration program times were announced but locations were not shared publicly for fear of violence.  It is shocking to see the hatred that was unleashed with so many pro-Palestinian protests on the one-year anniversary of October 7th. 

The World’s Response 

Roger Cohen, an op-ed columnist for the International NY Times, reporting from Tel Aviv, summarized the world’s initial and subsequent reactions to the brutal events of October 7th: 

Much of the world understood Israel’s reaction, at least for a moment. But quickly, a Palestinian narrative of Israeli “genocide” in Gaza gained traction. The catastrophe, then, was not Israel’s, but that of the Palestinian people, systematically oppressed, in this telling, by a ruthless Israel intent for decades on dispossessing them. 

Cohen also cited the broad embrace of the Palestinian cause as an extension of movements for racial and social justice in the United States. 

The Rise of Anti-Semitism Close to Home 

Hate crimes and anti-Semitic incidents are growing and continue to threaten us with accompanying violence.  They are no longer faraway news reports but they are happening in our own neighborhoods.  Just recently, a Jewish spa owner’s windows were broken in Boerum Hill, Brooklyn, less than a mile from my home. 

College students still feel dangerously vulnerable and are grappling with anti-Semitism and pro-Palestinian factions on campus. 

Many Israelis have been displaced from their homes due to the war in Gaza and the war in the North. There are whole communities and kibbutzim near the Gaza border that remain in ruins, as they were on October 7^th, 

We continue to pray that Hamas will release the remaining hostages (including the bodies of those killed) even while the war intensifies and grows. 

How Are We Stronger? 

Many have said one year later and one year stronger. How are we stronger? 

Israel has been blessed with open miracles this past year as the country faced fierce battles to eliminate Hamas and then Hezbollah.   

Jews have set aside their differences and have come together to defend Israel. 

Israel has been fighting an existential war, both in terms of security and its Zionist and democratic values.  We are fighting for Israel’s right to exist and survive.    

Last month, at the October 7^th memorial at Congregation Bnai Avraham in Brooklyn Heights, Dr. Yair Ansbacher, an Israeli counter-terrorism expert,  explained that, in reality, the war is not against Hamas only or Hezbollah only, but is against Iran.  Iran pulls the strings and shapes the Middle East by Islamist proxies.  These include Hamas in the South (Gaza), Hezbollah in the North (Lebanon), Jihad in Judea and Samaria and the Palestinian territories, the Houthis in Yemen, and others in Iraq and Bahrain. 

In spite of the surge in anti-Semitism, we continue to use our Jewish mindset and practice values of optimism, faith, hope, and positivity. Most importantly, we try to exercise resilience.   

After October 7th, Jewish resilience meant the creation of a new normal.  Resilience requires not only perseverance but also the ability to adapt to adverse events.  Yossi Klein Halevi is an American-born Israeli author and journalist. Halevi said, “Even as we maintain the pretense of daily life (in Israel), a part of us is permanently alert.” 

Consequences of October 7th  

Friends asking each other: where were you when you heard about what happened on October 7th? has the same ring as asking: where you on 9/11? That date of October 7th, and what it represented, was like 9/11 – so shocking, which provoked such deep mourning for so many innocents.  

The Black Shabbat and the unprovoked war triggered a myriad of feelings including shock, despair, pain, depression, grief, and anger.   

However, as a result of October 7th, there was a surge of Jewish unity and pride both in Israel and globally.   

Israeli citizens of all political affiliations and religious orientations came together. Protests condemning Netanyahu and decrying the proposed judicial reform abated.  Signs and bumper stickers popped up all over Israel with the slogan b’yachad nenatzayach – together we will win. In religious communities “bezrat Hashem” was added. This slogan was printed on the outside wrappers of paper towels, on signs welcoming drivers to cities across the country, on posters along the highways, and in the windows of homes and stores everywhere. Reservists who had previously refused to appear for duty lined up to serve.  Reservists flew into Israel from all over the world – not just vacationers backpacking in India and Thailand, but even Israelis who had settled abroad and who had been away for years.   

An Increase in Religious Observance   

Nova survivors began observing Shabbat. This past March, the wildly popular Israeli comedian Hochman Guy called on his Tik Tok followers to help him reach one hundred thousand Jews to observe to the upcoming Shabbat for the first time in their lives. “We will show our enemies what kind of people we are,” he said. He told his followers that this would be the very first time he would be observing Shabbat.  

More Israeli soldiers began wearing tzitzit, as volunteers around the country worked tirelessly to affix the strings and tie them properly. Rabbi Asher Weiss, a well-respected Israeli posek, originally from Borough Park, gave a psak allowing women to tie tzitzit, as well. More Israeli men are donning tefillin.  Community member Linda Cohen, along with Ramona Mizrahi, launched the leilui nishmat project in memory of Ramona’s brother.  They collect used tefillin along with donations to purchase new tefillin and send them to Israel for soldiers. 

Jews in the Diaspora began to rethink their priorities and what it means to be a Jew in the U.S. and in other countries.  They began returning to shul, lighting Shabbat candles, and displaying their Jewish identity by wearing Jewish stars, kippot, and “Bring Them Home Now” necklace tags.  

Jews across the globe are affirming their belief in Israel’s right to exist as our homeland. 

Anti-Semitism Spikes 

The Israel-Hamas war has caused a spike in anti-Semitism outside of Israel, particularly in the U.S. and in Europe.   

The Atlantic magazine recently published an article by Dara Horn titled: October 7 Created a Permission Structure for Anti-Semitism, with the subtitle: What American Jews have experienced in the past year is both a pattern and a warning. 

The U.S. Holocaust Museum reports that since October 7th an unprecedented wave of anti-Semitism, Holocaust distortion, and Holocaust denial has swept the globe. 

As of October 10th, the Israeli prime minister’s office lists 97 hostages still held in Gaza, and has confirmed 34 of them as dead, bringing the estimated number of living hostages to 63. Unbelievably, posters with pictures of the hostages are still being ripped down on college campuses. 

“I am not the same person I was before October 7th.”  

This phrase articulates how many Israelis and Diaspora Jews feel after October 7th.  Many experienced distress and pain that will plague them forever.  Some turned to Shabbat observance, like Ori and his wife who miraculously survived the Nova massacre. 

Other survivors vow to live their best lives to honor their friends whose lives were cut short. 

And the Jewish value of optimism still prevails. 

The phrase “we will dance again” became a mantra and is also a reflection of our Jewish values of hope and resilience.   

A 90-minute documentary film, “We Will Dance Again,”  was produced about the victims and survivors of the Nova Music Festival.  A special preview was screened in London on September 24th.   

The slogan “never again” was used by liberated prisoners at Buchenwald concentration camp to denounce fascism. The slogan was popularized by Jewish Defense League founder Rabbi Meir Kahana in his 1971 book, Never Again! in reference to the Holocaust. The Anti-Defamation League updated this saying to “Never is now” for the world’s largest summit against anti-Semitism and hate this past March.    

The Shoah Foundation is in the process of documenting the testimonies of survivors of October 7th.   

Community Support  

Jewish communities worldwide bolstered our brothers and sisters in Israel in many ways.  Significant financial donations have been made to vital organizations such as ZAKA, Magen David Adom, and United Hatzalah  by synagogues, individuals, and not-for- profits.   Hesed funds raise money for widows and children of fallen soldiers, for displaced Israeli families, and for army boots and other essential equipment.  Israeli farmers and companies also need our help. 

Community member, Victor Cohen, beautifully conveys our community’s meaningful response to October 7th.  Our community has helped the soldiers and citizens of Israel emotionally, spiritually, and financially.  

Victor noted, “We have been seeking to deepen our connection to the land and to the people of Israel. We pray for the welfare of our brothers and sisters, send financial aid, and organize shipments of supplies. One of the most crucial activities we have done, though, is to go to Israel ourselves.”  Several Jersey Shore solidarity missions headed to Israel in the wake of October 7th.  The groups packed food boxes, visited the Gaza envelope where the attacks took place, including going to the Nova Festival site and nearby kibbutzim. They visited injured soldiers, Hostage Square in Tel Aviv, and much more. No one was left unaffected by what they saw, and from their conversations with Israelis they met.  

Last December, ten community members, including Rabbi David Ozeri and Rabbi David Sutton, traveled to Israel to show their support. They visited leading rabbis in Yerushalayim to provide hizuk and to deliver financial assistance for their yeshivot.  Jack E. Rahmey wrote, “While the IDF employs military force against our enemies, we believe that learning Torah and praying to Hashem are potent weapons, as well. Unity as a nation ensures the presence of Hashem and guarantees our survival.”  Their trip also included hesed, visiting the hostages’ families and injured soldiers, seeing the charred remains of kibbutz homes, dancing with soldiers up North, and giving tzedakah to yeshivot in Bnai Brak and other parts of Israel. 

There were community gatherings, online events including virtual tours of Israel, readings, and other commemorations held to honor the victims and learn about the lessons of October 7th.  

• At some events people stood in silence while the names of those who were killed were read, including IDF soldiers and hostages.  

• Films were screened that depicted the story of the hostages and their families. 

• Many participated in mitzvot such as learning Torah and doing hesed. Many individuals took  on a new mitzvah. 

• Art projects were conducted, such as drawing the red anemone, Israel’s national flower, as a symbol of unity.  

• A global Simchat Torah project was initiated to honor those who were lost on October 7th by adorning Torah scrolls with special covers.  

• A virtual tour of an exhibition at the Anu [from the Hebrew word for “we” or “us”] Museum of the Jewish People at the Tel Aviv University that examines how Israeli culture has reacted to the war.  

• The Lookstein Center at Bar-Ilan University created educational resources to help students worldwide to meaningfully remember the October 7th events.  

What You Can Do 

Keep praying for the speedy return of our hostages and the protection of our soldiers, members of the security forces, and search and rescue teams. Pray for the Jews in Israel and for the refuah sheleima of our holim. 

Join a WhatsApp Tehillim group.  Join Partners in Protection to be matched up with a partner for learning Torah. The commitment is to learn together for just ten minutes a week, learning in the merit of a specific soldier (partnersinprotection.org/iotg). 

Take on a new mitzvah.  

Donate to organizations in Israel.   

Volunteer locally or in Israel.  Raise funds for Israel in your shul or for an organization. Recognize that Israeli soldiers are not just fighting for Israel but for Jews around the world.  Go on a mission to Israel, volunteer on a kibbutz, or other place with a labor shortage, such as farms or school. 

Attend solidarity rallies. 

To strengthen our college students, the Israel Campus Coalition inspires U.S. college students to see Israel as a source of pride and empowers them to stand up for Israel on campus.   

Advocate for Israel by writing to your government representatives using easy-to-use templates.  

Be united and be there for each other and find comfort in your family and community.  

Ellen Geller Kamaras, CPA/MBA, is an International Coach Federation (ICF) Associate Certified Coach.  Her coaching specialties include life, career, and dating coaching.  Ellen is active in her community and is currently the Acting President of Congregation Bnai Avraham in Brooklyn Heights.  She can be contacted at ellen@lifecoachellen.com (www.lifecoachellen.com). 

QUESTION: 

Dear Rabbi Ali, 

I have been struggling with something in my marriage for about a year and it’s only getting worse. My husband has stopped going to minyan in the morning almost completely. He doesn’t go to classes anymore and seems to be falling spiritually in general. I am concerned for him and the family. Our kids see this and I’m worried that they will be lax spiritually as well. I have told him how I feel multiple times, but it turns into a fight every time. Your advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. 

R’ ALI’S RESPONSE: 

There are many points that need clarity. I see many people struggling with this and see many cases that are similar to yours. There’s the point of being a good wife, which does entail caring about your husband and being concerned for his physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. There’s another point of how to approach the situation. And the third point is how your children are being affected, which is not simple at all. 

Let’s start with the first point of being concerned for your spouse’s well-being. The feeling that you have, which is that your husband is not holding spiritually where he used to, is the feeling of a good spouse. To say, “Let him do his job and I’ll do mine,” is not really the approach for a spouse. There is a well-known saying that people often say to women when they are getting married, “You are not your husband’s mashgiah (rabbi, mentor, etc…). We will soon explain what this means. However it does not mean that you are not to be concerned about your husband’s spiritual level, similar to his physical and emotional status. Of course, we all agree that “you are not your husband’s doctor.” However, a good wife will instinctively be concerned if her husband’s cholesterol is too high. This is  included in being a “helpmate” for your husband.  

The second point is where things get tricky. The goal is to help your husband, not to hurt him or create a new problem, namely a lack of shalom bayit. You have to realize that this is definitely a sore topic and needs to be dealt with delicately. I would advise against telling him that he’s falling spiritually or hurting the family. This will not be received well, as you have stated. Actually, this is not exclusive to spirituality. To demand, command, or give any rebuke to a spouse, could be degrading and is the source of many shalom bayit issues. This is where the famous saying of “you are not your husband’s mashgiah” comes into play. It is not advisable to tell him where he is failing. Leave that to the rabbi or to anyone else who has an influence on him. 

Practically speaking, what can be done? I suggest a three-step process. Number one, show concern. Instead of saying, “Why can’t you wake up?” you can ask if everything is okay, and say that you’re concerned, is there anything that you can do to help? If he says that he’s fine, then drop it. The next step would be to give positive praise and reinforcement when he does go to minyan. Wait for that moment. that I do believe will happen, and let him know how beautiful it is to see him go to minyan. It may sound childish, but this is the way we operate in business as well. Any good boss knows that positivity works wonders and negativity is a failing system. 

The third step could be used as a last resort or in conjunction with the first two. Speak to someone who you know that your husband respects and listens to, preferably a rabbi. To get a phone call from a rabbi  saying that he’s missed in shul and that things are not the same without him will make almost anyone feel like a million dollars. 

The third point that you bring up about your kids is a real concern. However, there is so much that you can do on your end. You can read the young ones bedtime stories about big tzadikim, depending on their age. For the older ones, you can give them positive praise when you see them do mitzvot such as going to minyan or making berachot. The more you praise them, the more you will make them excited about the mitzvot that they do. There is a lot to talk about, but I do believe these are the basics. 

This month, we will once again read the remarkable story of akedat Yitzhak, the unimaginable test of faith which Avraham faced when Gd appeared to him and commanded him to do the unthinkable – to sacrifice his beloved son, Yitzhak, whom he had miraculously fathered at the age of 100.   

Compliance with this command required Avraham to not only overcome his natural feelings of love for his son, but also to act in opposite to the most basic foundations of ethical conduct, and common sense.  Avraham spent his life preaching morality and kindness, and was now expected to kill his own son without knowing why.  Moreover, Gd had previously promised that Yitzhak would produce a large nation, and He was now instructing that Yitzhak be killed before marrying and begetting children.  Avraham nevertheless complied, immediately setting out with Yitzhak to Mount Moriah – the future site of the Bet Hamikdash – to offer him as a sacrifice.  Just as he took hold of the knife, Gd called to him and told him to desist, explaining that He was testing his faith, and did not actually want Yitzhak to be sacrificed. 

The importance of this event to us, Avraham’s descendants, is evidenced by the inclusion of this section of the Torah in our daily prayers, as part of the introduction to shaharit each morning.  Additionally, akedat Yitzhak features prominently in our prayers on the Yamim Noraim (High Holidays) as we beseech Gd for forgiveness and a favorable judgment.  In fact, this story is the Torah reading on the second day of Rosh Hashanah.  And, one of the explanations given for the symbolism of the shofar is that it commemorates the ram which Avraham sacrificed on the altar in Yitzhak’s place. 

There is so much about this story to study, analyze, and learn from, and each year, when Parashat Vayera comes around, I find myself drawn to this subject despite the many other fascinating and important topics found in this parashah.  Here, however, I would like to focus on one verse toward end of the story of the akedah which I feel is often neglected, but that, as we will see, may shed light on one of the most critically important consequences of this extraordinary display of self-sacrifice. 

“Gd Shall See” 

After Avraham sacrificed the ram, he declared that the site of this sacrifice should be named “Hashem yireh” – literally, “Gd shall see” (Beresheet 22:14).  What did Avraham want Gd to “see”? 

Rashi brings two interpretations.  The first, which Rashi cites from Onkelos’ Aramaic translation, is that Avraham refers to the designation of this site as the location of the Bet Hamikdash.  Avraham prophetically foresaw that Gd would choose the place of this altar, upon which Yitzhak was bound, as the site where His presence would reside and where his descendants would offer sacrifices. 

Secondly, as Rashi brings from the Midrash, Avraham here prayed that Gd should see this act of self-sacrifice, and invoke this merit of behalf of his descendants.  When the Jewish People would sin and be worthy of harsh punishment, Gd should see this altar and Avraham’s willingness to sacrifice that which was most precious to him, and in this merit, He should forgive the nation and save them. 

Yet, a third explanation is given by the Gaon of Vilna (Rav Eliyahu of Vilna, 1720-1797).  He writes that when Gd first created Adam and Havah, He resided with them, as it were, in Gan Eden.  As a result of their sin, however, He drove them from Gan Eden, distancing them from Him.  And then, as mankind continued to sin, Gd withdrew further and further.  The process  of the return of the Shechinah (divine presence) to earth began with Avraham, and reached its culmination at Mount Sinai, when Gd actually descended onto the mountain and appeared to Beneh Yisrael.  Avraham thus declared at the time of akedat Yitzhak that “Gd shall see” – Gd was now drawing closer to the world and to mankind, such that He could be said to “see” them.  At the time of the Revelation at Sinai, Gd was so close that He not only “saw,” but was also clearly seen by the people.  And thus, after the Torah tells us that Avraham declared “Hashem yireh” (“Gd shall see”), it adds, “that it is said today: Gd shall be seen.”  This means that “today” – the day the Torah was given – Hashem was actually seen, as He revealed Himself to the people. 

The “Mesirut Nefesh” Instinct 

Of particular interest to us here, however, is the unique interpretation of this verse suggested by Rav Meir Simcha of Dvinsk (1843-1926), in his Meshech Hochmah commentary. 

Rav Meir Simcha reveals for us the eternal impact of akedat Yitzhak, how this event left its mark upon the hearts and souls of all Jews for all generations.  Yitzhak’s willingness to sacrifice his life for the sake of the divine will implanted within all his descendants the desire to fulfill Gd’s will at all costs, no matter what sacrifices this entails.  The event of akedat Yitzhak affected the “wiring” of Am Yisrael for all time, igniting within us the drive and determination to do Gd’s bidding, and the “mesirut nefesh” – willingness to sacrifice ourselves – to that end.  This instinct was aroused within us all the moment Yitzhak allowed himself to be placed on the altar and be sacrificed in fulfillment of Gd’s command. 

Rav Meir Simcha explains on this basis the astonishing principle articulated by our sages concerning a Jew’s unfulfilled ambitions.  The Gemara (Kiddushin 40a) teaches, “Mahashavah tovah metzarefah lemaa’aseh” – Gd “combines a good thought to the action.”  This means that if a person genuinely aspired to perform a certain mitzvah, and was determined to do whatever was needed to achieve this goal, but was unable to realize his ambition due to practical constraints, or circumstances beyond his control, he is nevertheless credited with that mitzvah.  As long as he sincerely wished to perform the good deed, and despaired only when the mitzvah was truly out of reach, he is considered to have performed that good deed.  However, the Gemara continues, this does not work in the converse.  If a person sought to commit a forbidden act, no matter how determined he was to follow through on his sinful ambitions, he is not held accountable unless he ended up actually transgressing.  Even though he truly wished to violate the Torah, and even if he went to great lengths trying to fulfill his forbidden desire, he is not punished if he was unable to do so. 

Why should this be the case?  Why do our noble intentions count, but our sinful intentions do not?  If what matters is the bottom-line, the actions we perform, then this should be true also of mitzvot, and we should receive credit only for what we actually achieve.  And if what matters is our will and intent, then why are we not held accountable for our unrealized sinful aspirations? 

Rav Meir Simcha finds the answer in the story of akedat Yitzhak – specifically, in the indelible imprint that Yitzhak’s mesirut nefesh had upon the soul of every Jew.  When a Jew sincerely seeks to perform a mitzvah, this will expresses the wishes of the deepest recesses of his being.  This desire to do good stems from his innate goodness, the natural impulse to sacrifice for Hashem which was implanted within us at the time of akedat Yitzhak.  Therefore, as this desire is pure and genuine, the person is credited with the performance of the mitzvah.  By contrast, when a Jew decides to violate Gd’s will, this desire does not reflect his true essence.  It is the product of some external factors, of various pressures and lures.  The Jew’s innermost being does not want to sin; such a desire is introduced by forces that are foreign to his core essence.  Therefore, the desire to sin is not sufficient to bring guilt, because it is not purely genuine.  (Rav Meir Simcha also references in this context the Rambam’s famous comments in Hilchot Gerushin 2:20 explaining that the inner desire of every Jew is to faithfully observe the mitzvot.) 

We Can All Be “Outreach Professionals” 

To understand the practical implications of this concept, we need simply to take note of the different attitudes that exist toward Jews who are not religiously observant. 

Many people, unfortunately, look at our unobservant brothers and sisters with condescension and disdain.  They resent these Jews’ failure to abide by the Torah’s laws, to embrace Jewish belief, and to live according to the Torah’s values and laws, and so they keep a distance and harbor feelings of scorn. 

Contrast this attitude with that of kiruv (outreach) professionals.  When someone involved in kiruv meets a Jew who does not observe the mitzvot, he right away sees that Jew’s inner spark of holiness, his potential for greatness, the imprint of akedat Yitzhak within the person’s heart.  He intuitively distinguishes between this precious Jew’s conduct and what this Jew’s heart truly wants.  In the eyes of an outreach professional, an unobservant Jew is not that much different from all of us – he is inherently good, possesses a sacred soul that longs for kedushah and for a connection with Gd, but is subject to innumerable lures that lead him astray.  And it is by focusing on this inherent sanctity embedded within the spirit of every Jew, that the spark can be ignited, leading to profound spiritual growth. 

This perspective should not be the exclusive province of outreach professionals.  This is something that all of us can and should do.  Rather than focus on all that is wrong with our fellow Jews, we should focus on all that is right about our fellow Jews.  We should see beyond the faults, shortcomings and lapses, and see the goodness and purity, the element of holiness that Yitzhak Avinu implanted within every Jew’s heart.  If we view our fellow Jews this way, we will enjoy far greater unity and harmony within our ranks, and we will be able to inspire one another and grow together.  And we will then be worthy heirs of the sacred legacy of Avraham and Yitzhak, such that their great merit will protect us and bring us our long-awaited final redemption, speedily and in our times, amen.