Pnina Souid

The Mitzvah Man recalls a day when the mitzvah he was searching for was not as he expected. “It was the end of the day, and I had been driving around for hours looking for a mitzvah to do. Finally, I spotted the building of Bnai Raphael, an organization that distributes food to hundreds of people. I parked my car, went inside, and asked who’s in charge. The man I spoke to answered, “I’m in charge.” I asked him, “I’d like to offer my services. Can I help you with anything today?”

“Perfect timing! Today is Thursday and we need someone to take out the garbage.”

I thought to myself, “Today Hashem wants me to take out the garbage, and I am happy to do that. This is not beneath me. Whatever needs doing I will do.”

“You have to take the bags of garbage to the sidewalk, and all the food cartons must be folded, tied up, and put out neatly.”

“Thank you, Hashem! Today, my mitzvah is taking out the garbage for this wonderful organization!”

I got to work. For two hours, I was dealing with garbage and I was smiling. I realized that today Hashem wanted me to take out the garbage for Bnai Raphael. I took out the garbage, tied up the cartons and took them out, and swept the floor, to clean up the onion peels and other food remnants from the boxes.

I was hoping to see someone so I could tell them that today Hashem wanted me to take out the garbage and I was very happy to do this mitzvah! In fact, I am proud to take out the garbage.

Hashem gives us opportunities to do mitzvot. Some are easy and clean. Some, however, are more challenging. Hashem wants us to do these types of hesed with a full heart as well. When you do a mitzvah that takes you out of your way or out of your comfort zone you don’t lose out. In fact, you may even get extra credit.

Pharaoh was more than just a king. For us, he was – and is – a symbol.

A number of traditional sources, including the Zohar, teach that Pharaoh, the king of Egypt who enslaved our ancestors, symbolizes the yetzer hara, our evil inclination, our negative tendencies, our vices, our sinful instincts. Of course, the story of Pharaoh is true and historically accurate. But in addition, Pharaoh embodied the yetzer hara, and thus by studying his behavior, we gain a clearer understanding of the “Pharaoh” within us that we must constantly struggle to overcome.

Most obviously, the yetzer hara, like Pharaoh, “enslaves” us. I doubt anyone reading this never felt trapped or chained by a bad habit, by some lure or temptation.

Additionally, as we read this month, Pharaoh acted irrationally, without reason. He continually refused to led Beneh Yisrael leave Egypt even when this was clearly and undeniably the correct thing to do for the benefit of his kingdom, which was devastated by plague after plague due to his intransigence. Our yetzer hara, too, causes us to act insensibly, to persist in our negative behaviors even as we know how detrimental and destructive they are.

In this context, however, I would like to draw our attention to one particular aspect of Pharaoh’s story which should inform the way we approach our human weaknesses.

Moshe the “Macho Man”?

Following the eighth plague, the plague of locusts, Pharaoh relented, and he informed Moshe that he would permit all Beneh Yisrael to leave – but on the condition that their cattle remain behind in Egypt.

Moshe, predictably, refused – but he does so with uncharacteristic vehemence. He told Pharaoh that not only would Beneh Yisrael take their own cattle, but Pharaoh himself would give them his own animals to be offered as sacrifices to Gd. But most strikingly, perhaps, Moshe declared, “Lo tisha’er parsah – Not a hoof will remain!” (10:26). He emphasized that not one of his people’s animals – not even one leg of an animal! – would stay in Egypt.

We are not accustomed to seeing Moshe “talk tough,” not even to Pharaoh. Why was Moshe so insistent that every “hoof” needed to leave Egypt? Was this just posturing, an attempt to sound “macho”?

One explanation is indicated by the Midrash, which explains that Moshe considered the possibility that Gd would require the offering of innumerable animal sacrifices. Moshe said to Pharaoh, “…and we do not know with what we will serve Gd until we arrive there” The Midrash comments that since Beneh Yisrael had not offered any sacrifices over the course of their 210-year sojourn in Egypt, Moshe wondered if perhaps they would need to make up for all these missing years, and bring over two centuries’ worth of sacrifices. Hence, we might say that Moshe wasn’t “talking tough” with Pharaoh, but simply stating the fact that Beneh Yisrael would need as many animals as they could bring, given the possibility that they would be asked to make up for all the years during which they were unable to bring sacrifices to Gd.

However, this would not explain Moshe’s emphasis that “lo tisha’er parsah” – no “hoof” would remain in Egypt. Why did he need to be so dramatic in demanding that Pharaoh let Beneh Yisrael’s animals leave with them?

The Sneaky “Baby-Step” Scheme

The answer becomes clear once we understand that Pharaoh wasn’t just a king, but rather a model and embodiment of the yetzer hara.

The Gemara (Shabbat 105b) tells us about the devious strategy employed by the yetzer hara to lure us to sin:

For this is the evil inclination’s scheme: Today it tells him, “Do this”; the next day, it tells him, “Do this;” until it tells him, “Worship idols,” and he goes ahead and worships.

If the yetzer hara would try to entice an ordinary, Gd-fearing Jew today to pray on Sunday morning in a church, this is not likely to happen. Rarely does a person fall so far so rapidly. Instead, the yetzer hara takes baby steps, pushing a person one small stride at a time. It first convinces him to commit some relatively minor infraction which is beneath the individual’s standards. For some people, this might mean neglecting to recite birkat hamazon after eating bread. For some, it might mean sleeping late and missing minyan. For others, this might be sharing some “juicy” gossip. The point is that the yetzer hara seeks to keep a hold on the person, in whichever way it can. It will try to convince him to do something that he knows he shouldn’t do, but that is not such a grave violation that he would never countenance committing it. The yetzer hara’s goal is not this relatively minor infraction itself, but rather to maintain a foothold, to keep the person under its influence.

The reason behind this strategy is something which the yetzer hara knows very well, but which we often forget – that one thing leads to another. Once we let the yetzer hara into our lives, and into our beings, we come under its influence and can so easily fall into a downward spiral. Gd told Kayin, “Lapetah hatat rovetz – Sin crouches at the entrance” (Beresheet 4:7). The process of sin begins “at the entrance,” by letting the yetzer hara into the door to our hearts. Once we start negotiating and arguing with the yetzer hara, we are then likely to start making compromises to accommodate it, to make exceptions, however inherently slight. These compromises and exceptions then lead to others, potentially sending us far from where we ought to be.

The only response to the yetzer hara is to slam the door in its face and not let it in. If we allow ourselves to be dragged into negotiations and discussions, our fortifications are then breached, and we are at grave risk of spiritual demise.

This is the message of Moshe’s fervent, passionate proclamation, “Lo tisha’er parsah” – that not a single hoof would remain in Egypt. We cannot give Pharaoh an inch, not even a single “hoof.” If a hoof would remain in Egypt, there is no telling who else would end up getting stuck in Egypt. We cannot allow the yetzer hara any leeway. Our rejection must be firm and absolute.

The Lesson of Eliyahu’s Bull

This explanation dovetails with a fascinating insight by the Malbim (Rav Meir Leibush Wisser, 1809-1879) regarding the text of this verse.

The Malbim perceptively notes that Moshe did not tell Pharaoh that Beneh Yisrael would bring their cattle with them. Instead, he said, “Vegam miknenenu yelech imanu – And also our cattle will come with us.” The flocks wouldn’t be brought out by the people – they would leave on their own!

The Malbim explains what this means based on the story of the prophet Eliyahu’s “showdown” with the pagan prophets on Mount Carmel. As we read in the Book of Melachim I (chapter 18), Eliyahu challenged the prophets of the pagan god ba’al to a contest of sorts, whereby he and they would bring sacrifices, and the one whose sacrifice would be visibly accepted would be proven right. Eliyahu brought two bulls, and invited the prophets of ba’al to choose the bull that they would sacrifice to their deity. Needless to say, these prophets received no response from their imaginary god after sacrificing their bull. Eliyahu then proceeded to offer the second bull, and he prayed to Gd for a response. A heavenly fire descended and consumed the sacrifice, proving to all the people the truth of monotheism.

The Midrash relates that the bull chosen by the pagan prophets was reluctant to go. It refused to be used for the purpose of pagan worship. Eliyahu convinced the bull that it was actually a privilege to be sacrificed to ba’al, as this would result in a spectacular kiddush Hashem (glorification of Gd), whereby the entire nation would recognize the truth about Hashem. At that point, the bull proceeded.

In light of this story, the Malbim suggests a novel explanation of Moshe’s response to Pharaoh. Moshe was saying that Beneh Yisrael’s cattle would leave Egypt on its own, willing and eager to be sacrificed to Gd. Unlike the pagan prophets’ bull – which needed to be persuaded to be used as a sacrifice to ba’al – Beneh Yisrael’s animals left Egypt happily, enthusiastic about their role in the service of the Almighty.

The Malbim adds that this is why Moshe then told Pharaoh, “ki mimenu nikah la’avod et Hashem – for we will take from it [the cattle] to serve Gd.” He was saying that Beneh Yisrael would “take” a precious lesson in religious devotion from their cattle. When they see their herds eagerly going to be sacrificed to Gd, they will be moved and inspired, and will strive for this level of unbridled and enthusiastic commitment.

Once we “shut the door” on the yetzer hara, we eliminate all our inner reluctance and ambivalence. Once we make the resolute, unwavering decision to reject our sinful tendencies, our service of Hashem will be far more energetic, wholehearted, enthusiastic, and fulfilling. Rather than be encumbered by reluctance and inner struggle, we will – like our ancestors’ cattle – march naturally and eagerly along the path of Torah and mitzvot. The critical first step is to declare, “Lo tisha’er parsah” – that we are not letting the yetzer ha’ra through the door, that we reject it, that we are entirely free from its clutches, leaving it in control of nothing, not even a single “hoof.”

The lesson of Moshe’s pronouncement to Pharaoh, then, is that we must make the firm decision to leave “Pharaoh,” to abandon our bad habits, to reject our vices, and to commit ourselves fully and unconditionally to the Almighty’s will.

By Rita Shabot, Career Division Director at SBH

At the SBH Career Division, our mission is simple yet deeply impactful: to help every job seeker find confidence, direction, and meaningful opportunity. We believe that when one person rises, the entire community rises with them.

Our Passion to Help

Every day, our dedicated team of professional job developers, résumé writers, and volunteer coaches walks into the Career Division with purpose. We understand that searching for work – whether you’re just beginning your journey or navigating a career transition – can feel overwhelming. At SBH, no one walks alone.

The voices of our clients speak powerfully to this care. One individual shared:

“You really helped me out with my résumé and connecting me with job opportunities. I’m waiting to hear back from a few companies and have a second-round interview on Monday thanks to one of the connections you made. Thank you for your assistance through all this. Wishing you a happy and healthy new year. Shanah Tovah!”

Messages like these affirm the impact of our work every single day.

Our Process: Step by Step, Side by Side

From the moment someone reaches out, we take the time to listen—to goals, concerns, and even insecurities. We create a personalized plan, offer targeted support, and remain alongside our clients throughout their journey.

One client expressed this experience with deep gratitude:

“Sheri, I want to thank you for being so available and patient with me through this process. I believe you must have a degree in social work because you addressed many of my insecurities. May Hashem continue to give you the words to help all who rely on you. You have a special gift!”

This kind of trust is something we cherish and strive to earn every day.

We’re Here for You

Our professionals do far more than match résumés to job postings. They are motivators, strategists, advocates, and emotional supports. Clients consistently feel seen, valued, and believed in.

As one person shared:

“Nathan treated me like his only client and genuinely cared about the mission of finding me a new role. SBH, and those who reach out, are fortunate to have him. Thank you.”

This level of care is not the exception – it is our standard.

Our Volunteers: The Heartbeat of Our Division

We are blessed with an extraordinary network of volunteer job coaches and retention coaches who give selflessly of their time, experience, and hearts. They mentor, encourage, and inspire – often continuing their support long after a placement is made.

One client captured this sentiment perfectly:

“Thank you for your assistance. I definitely appreciate that you’re on the other end trying to make things better for everyone.”

Their gratitude reflects the lasting ripple effect created by our volunteers’ compassion.

Our Supportive Services

To help clients thrive, the SBH Career Division offers a comprehensive range of services designed to support both immediate goals and long-term success:

• Professional Résumé Writing
  One-on-one collaboration to create polished, impactful résumés that open doors.
• Skills Training
  Interview preparation, workplace readiness, and confidence-building support.
• Job Coaches
  Personalized guidance through the job search process, from applications to offers.
• Retention Coaches
  Continued support after placement to ensure stability, growth, and success.

Young Professionals: Building the Future

We are especially proud of our Young Professionals Program, which empowers the next generation through:

• Internship placements that provide real-world experience
• Mentor–mentee relationships that inspire and guide
• Industry events and roundtables that build networks and open career paths

These initiatives equip young adults with confidence, direction, and opportunity.

At the SBH Career Division, we believe in people.
We believe in untapped potential, new beginnings, and the power of community members lifting one another up. Our staff and volunteers – job developers, résumé writers, coaches, and mentors – work every day with one shared mission: To help you succeed professionally, personally, and confidently.

We’re here for you. Always.

By SIMHA Mental Health Series

Technology has become a constant part of our lives. Our phones wake us up, guide our schedules, entertain us, and connect us with people around the world. Social media, texting, streaming, and now artificial intelligence bring incredible convenience and opportunity. But they also bring challenges that quietly affect our mental health, relationships, and sense of connection.

This guide, based on insights shared by Dr. Eli Shapiro, offers a warm, practical way to understand our relationship with technology and how to keep it healthy.

Technology Isn’t the Enemy

Rather than seeing technology as “good” or “bad,” Dr. Shapiro encourages us to see it like any other relationship in our lives. Some relationships are healthy, supportive, and balanced. Others become demanding, distracting, or draining.

A simple question helps us figure out where we stand: Is technology enhancing my life right now – or is it intruding on it?

Some days it helps us stay connected, learn, and accomplish more. Other days, it interrupts family time, sleep, or even our sense of peace. Becoming aware of this difference is the first step toward healthier digital habits.

Why We Feel More Connected Yet More Alone

Humans are built for connection. Our emotional health depends on real, face-to-face relationships – the kind where we talk, listen, laugh, and share experiences.

Yet today, people spend far less time with one another. The Surgeon General reported that in the past decade we spend 30 fewer hours per month in real social, face-to-face activities. And, we spend five fewer hours per month engaging with people in our own household.

Instead of being with people, we scroll. Instead of conversations, we consume content. Social media imitates connection but cannot replace real relationships.

You might have thousands of followers, but that doesn’t mean you feel emotionally supported or understood. Digital contact gives quantity, not quality. Real connection requires presence – something that technology often pulls us away from.

How to Recognize When Technology Is Getting in the Way

Technology becomes unhealthy when it begins to interfere with our primary responsibilities or relationships. Some signs include staying up too late on the phone, ignoring people in the home, missing work goals or schoolwork, feeling anxious when you can’t check your device, using screens to escape everyday life, and spending more time online than with friends or family

This doesn’t mean you have a “problem.” It means awareness is needed – and small changes can make a big difference.

People with anxiety, ADHD, depression, autism, or past trauma may be more sensitive to digital stimulation. Their brains can react more strongly to online activity, making it harder to unplug. There is no shame in this – it simply means healthier boundaries are even more important.

The Power of Digital Detox – Even for a Few Minutes

One of the most powerful tools for healthier living is intentional disconnection. In the Jewish community, Shabbat offers a built-in weekly reset: phones off, minds calm, and hearts open. Dr. Shapiro describes Shabbat as a true gift – a chance to breathe and be present.

But even outside of Shabbat, you can create smaller “mini-Shabbat moments” during the week:

• Put phones away during meals – “going dark for dinner”.
• Turn on “Do Not Disturb” or sleep mode at night.
• Leave the phone in another room for the first five minutes of your morning.
• Set one hour each evening for family-only time.

These small acts give your brain a break and allow deeper connection with the people around you.

Be Present. Be Aware. Be Balanced.

Technology is here to stay. And in many ways, it enriches our lives more than ever before. But it must be used thoughtfully.

Here’s the heart of the message: You don’t need to throw away your phone or quit social media. You just need a healthier, more intentional relationship with it.

Try the following: notice when technology enhances your life rather intrudes on it, create small moments of digital rest, and prioritize real-world relationships. Thereby, you can protect your mental health and strengthen the connections that truly matter.

And if you ever feel overwhelmed or unsure how to create this balance, SIMHA is here to help guide you, support you, and connect you with the right professionals.

Technology should serve you – not the other way around.

By Rabbi Hayim Asher Arking and Rabbi Ezra Ghodsi

What is the significance of Tu B’Shevat?

Each year features four distinct occasions that mark the beginning of a specific New Year, meaning there are four Rosh Hashanahs. The first day of Nissan serves as Rosh Hashanah for the counting of a king’s reign. The first day of Elul is designated for determining ma’aser from animals. The first day of Tishrei, Rosh Hashanah, is the time when all people are judged, and it is also pertinent to the counting of years for events such as yovel and shemitah. Finally, the fifteenth of Shevat – Tu B’Shevat (where “Tu” refers to the Hebrew letters ט”ו, corresponding to fifteen) – is the New Year for trees. This date marks the beginning of the year for purposes related to terumah and orlah.

What changes are made in the tefillah?

Tachanun is not recited on Tu B’Shevat, nor is it recited during Minha prior to Tu B’Shevat. If Tu B’Shevat falls on Shabbat, “Tsidkatecha” is also not recited.

Just as on Rosh Hashanah we pray for a good year, it is customary on Tu B’Shevat to recite berachot and prayers for the year’s prosperity. As such, we recite berachot for all types of fruits, vegetables, and foods. Reciting a beracha brings blessing to all living flora on Earth, the source of our sustenance. For example, when one recites the beracha of ha’ets, it invokes a blessing upon all fruit trees globally, enabling them to bear fruit abundantly.

Is there a special prayer to say before eating the fruits?

It is a long-standing Syrian custom to recite the Arabic translation of the Aseret Hadibrot found in Shir Ushvaha (page 515) on Tu B’Shevat. Many also have the custom of reciting certain specific passages from the Torah, Mishnah, and Zohar that are relevant to the particular fruit they are eating, as detailed in the Sefer Pri Ess Hadar. There is also a custom to eat a dish of etrog jelly, made from the etrog used as part of the Arba Minim on the previous Sukkot. One should say a prayer that he should merit to find a beautiful etrog to use for the mitzva on the following Sukkot.

What is the proper order to recite the berachot?

When reciting berachot outside of a bread meal, the typical order is as follows:

1. Mezonot
2. Hagefen (Note: when reciting Kiddush, the hagefen needs to be said first.)
3. Ha’ets
4. Ha’adamah
5. Shehakol

What if I mistakenly recited a beracha not in the preferred order?

Although the berachot are supposed to be recited in the proper order, reciting a beracha out of order does not invalidate the beracha itself. However, it is important to note that in some cases a more specific beracha can be covered by a broader beracha. For example, if one mistakenly recites the beracha of ha’adamah intending to include an orange, a subsequent blessing of ha’ets on that same orange would not be permissible. However, if the ha’adamah beracha was recited on a vegetable without the intention of including the orange, the orange would not be covered by the initial beracha, and a separate ha’ets would still be required.

If I am eating different types of fruits, on which one do I recite ha’ets?

If a platter of many different fruits is served, for example, dates, figs, apples, etc. then the ha’ets is recited on one of the Shiv’at HaMinim (the seven agricultural products mentioned in the Torah as being special to the Land of Israel). There is also a specific order within this group. It is based on which fruit is mentioned closest to the word ‘erets’ in the pasuk ארץ חטה ושעורה וגו’. Therefore, the first beracha would be on the olives, and if there are no olives, then on the dates. If there are no dates, then it is said on the grapes, the figs, and then pomegranates.

What if there are no fruits from the Shiv’at HaMinim?

If the fruits that are served do not include one of the Shiv’at HaMinim, then the beracha is recited on a fruit that is whole. If there are many whole fruits, then you recite the beracha on the fruit that is generally more desirable to you. This is done out of honor for the blessing.

These rules also apply to any assortment of foods that are of the same beracha, such as bananas, watermelon, and cantaloupe; or cookies, cake, and pretzels.

If there is a shehehianu fruit, when would shehehianu be said?

According to many opinions, a shehehianu fruit is regarded as the “preferred fruit.” Therefore, if there are fruits from the Shiv’at HaMinim, the ha’ets would be recited on one of them. When only eating regular fruits, one should make a beracha of ha’ets on the shehehianu fruit, provided it has not been cut up. (Others say that a shehehianu fruit always takes precedence.)

What fruits require a shehehianu?

One can only recite shehehianu on produce that is seasonal and not available year-round. Nowadays, many seasonal fruits are still readily available to be purchased year-round, as they are imported from countries with warm climates, and would not require a shehehianu. If one wants to recite a shehehianu on a new fruit, they should get a more exotic one, like starfruit, passionfruit, etc.

What if I do not enjoy the taste?

If one knows that he does not enjoy the taste of a specific fruit and does not feel any happiness in eating the new fruit, a shehehianu should not be recited.

Should I recite ha’ets or shehehianu first?

It is preferable to recite ha’ets first, followed by a shehehianu, and then eat from the fruit. Some have the custom to recite the shehehianu first followed by the ha’ets.

What if I forgot to recite shehehianu?

If one is still in the middle of eating the fruit, he can still recite the beracha. However, if one is finished eating the fruit, the beracha can no longer be recited.

In Summary: When one is ready to partake of the Tu B’Shevat table, he should begin with a beracha of mezonot on cookies or cakes. Next, he should recite hagefen upon wine or grape juice. Then he should say the beracha of ha’ets on olives, dates, grapes, figs, or pomegranates (in that order). Otherwise, ha’ets is recited on any fruit of his choice if it is a whole fruit. If there is a fruit that one will be reciting shehehianu on, then that will take preference over other fruit. Afterward, one recites ha’adamah on the vegetable he generally prefers. Shehakol is the final beracha recited on food

90 Seconds: For Young Readers teaches young readers about selflessness, sacrifice, bravery, and the profound impact that caring for others can have on their own lives. Through an engaging and accessible narrative, the book tells the story of Eli Beer, who founded the world’s largest volunteer EMS (Emergency Medical Services) organization to ensure that anyone in need of emergency medical aid in Israel receives fast, free help.

On October 29th, Gavy Friedson, a United Hatzalah volunteer EMT who has responded to more than 10,000 emergency calls in Israel, spoke to 6^th graders at Yeshivah of Flatbush and Magen David Yeshivah, sharing life-saving stories from the field and distributing these books to hundreds of enthusiastic students.

Five hundred copies of 90 Seconds were generously sponsored by Raymond and Elizabeth Gindi, along with Al and Chantal Gindi, to distribute to children at these schools and throughout the Syrian Jewish community to inspire the next generation toward getting involved in tzedakah and United Hatzalah’s life-saving mission.

“The Syrian community has always stood by United Hatzalah. We are deeply grateful for the Gindi family’s selfless philanthropic leadership and effort to share their values of hesed and education through these books,” said Marcelle Farhi, Senior Development Associate at United Hatzalah.

The books are well suited for 6th graders, many of whom begin seeking to support impactful organizations for their bar and bat mitzvah projects. As they prepare for these moments, many children begin to understand that they can personally and directly make a difference by helping others in need.

When selecting their bar and bat mitzvah projects, kids can join United Hatzalah’s Leight Legacy Heroes program at www.israelrescue.org/heroesto raise $180 to sponsor an oxygen tank in Israel that bears their name. Their oxygen tank is then used by United Hatzalah medics in real, lifesaving missions, giving each child a tangible connection to the impact of their philanthropy.

For more information about United Hatzalah, or to receive a copy of 90 Seconds: For Young Readers and arrange a speaker for your school, please contact Marcelle Farhi at MarcelleF@israelrescue.org or visit IsraelRescue.org/heroes.

Ellen Geller Kamaras

“I am a self-starter. I started working at thirteen and put myself through college. My dream was to work in advertising on Madison Avenue. I found my sweet spot in promotional merchandising.” – Elaine

Please meet Elaine Parker, a successful businesswoman, mother, grandmother, and community member. She was born in Neptune, NJ and attended public schools while growing up in Elberon and West Long Branch, NJ. She reconnected with her Sephardic roots when her children studied at Hillel Yeshiva. She is the daughter of Naomi Nahum and Morris Dweck, a”h. The family of four, including Elaine’s older sister Randy, lived in Bradley Beach for a few years.

The sisters were three and eighteen months old respectively when their parents divorced. The girls saw their father on weekends and enjoyed family holidays in Brooklyn for many years.

Elaine’s mother Naomi later married Jay Wohl, an Ashkenazi man who became a wonderful second father, raising Elaine and Randy. Naomi and Jay had a son together, Neil. Elaine’s father, Morris, also remarried and had two children, Chucky and Loren, with his wife, Ellen Katz.

Morris Dweck, a”h, passed away sixteen years ago. After Morris’s passing, both sides of the family stayed very close sharing Shabbat dinners and holidays together.

Elaine’s Backbone – Her Mother

Naomi, Moroccan-born, spent most of her childhood and teenage years in Israel before moving to NY. Naomi’s Aunt Esther, married to Hacham Matloub Abadi, brought Naomi to America to live with them in the late 1950s. Naomi was very close to her Aunt Esther who often came from Brooklyn and spent time with her in New Jersey.

Elaine’s mother was the one who most influenced her to have a career. It was important to Naomi that Elaine learn to stand on her own two feet, to be a good wife and mother, and to achieve her goals. Naomi taught Elaine to have grit, to work hard, and to be a kind person.

A wise and strong woman from a religious family, Naomi lived through the Israeli War of Independence in 1948. Her family lived in Jerusalem at the time, and survived a bomb hitting the family home in Jerusalem.

Naomi later studied with a French couturière (seamstress) and became a talented seamstress herself. Naomi’s grandfather, Nissim Nachum, was a wealthy philanthropist who funded Yeshiva Rohobot HaNahar for Rabbi Shaul Dweck, who taught him Kabbalah. Many prominent Sephardic rabbis, including those from the Kassin, Tawil, and Yedid families, studied at that yeshiva.

Elaine’s School Days

As a child, Elaine was a B student, shy and quiet. In fifth grade, Elaine’s teacher called her mother, concerned that Elaine had only one close friend. Naomi replied that her daughter only needed one good friend. In truth, Elaine had several close friends and she became more extroverted in college and once she launched her career.

Although Elaine attended public school, she and her family were active members of the Jewish community. They prayed at Brothers of Israel, an Ashkenaz shul, and belonged to the JCC.

Elaine played trumpet in her high school marching band and was the yearbook photographer. Both roles helped her to secure admission to Rutgers University, where she majored in communications with a specialization in marketing and advertising.

“As a young girl, I loved advertisements and spent a lot of time studying the ads in magazines. After college, I found my niche in promotional merchandising.”

During the late eighties, most Jersey Shore high school graduates were attending college and pursuing careers. Neither of Elaine’s fathers encouraged her to apply to a four-year college. Determined to show her family that she could “have it all” – a family and a career – Elaine followed her dream.

At 13, Elaine started to earn money. Her jobs included babysitting, working at her father Jay’s penny arcade in Bradley Beach, and selling ceramic tiles on commission while studying at Rutgers University. The money she earned enabled her to put herself through college and helped her to become a confident people person.

Her Core

Elaine describes herself as disciplined, down-to-earth, a go-getter, very loyal to family and friends, playful, and funny. She is also warm and creative. She prides herself on being an out-of-the-box thinker – a talent that contributes to her success in promotional merchandising.

Marriage and Family

Elaine met her bashert, Glenn – a pre-med student – while at college. They had much in common. Both were hard-working self-starters who financed their own education. Glenn went on to study at Rutgers Medical School, and Elaine launched her thirty-seven-year career in promotional merchandising.

Glenn is a colorectal surgeon and is the Program Director for the General Surgery Residency at Jersey Shore University Medical Center, JSUMC. Elaine says, “Glenn mentors so many community kids to become doctors, PA’s, and nurses, helping them get internships and jobs. He stays with them throughout their journey. I am in awe of him.”

The couple has three children: Mitchell, a resident in radiation oncology at Memorial Sloan Kettering, Carly, a digital marketing account executive at the Morning Brew, and Jonathan, an attorney at Paul Hastings. Mitchell and his wife Michelle, a child psychologist at Barkay Yeshiva, have two young children. The Parkers raised their family in Oakhurst, NJ, and their children attended Hillel Yeshiva. Elaine refers to their upbringing as “Ashkefardic.” The family is affiliated with Brothers of Israel and Chabad of the Shore in Long Branch.

“Glenn and I live for our children. We are so proud of them. They are not entitled; they always worked summer jobs, did internships, and studied hard to achieve their degrees and positions.”

Career Path

Elaine’s professional journey has been marked by inventiveness, resilience, and a passion for excellence. She has consistently adapted to changing industry trends and technologies while maintaining long-standing client relationships, including NBC. Her innovative approach empowered her to deliver creative solutions that set her apart in the world of promotional merchandising.

Eight months before marrying Glenn, Elaine began her career in sales and promotional merchandising. Her first professional job was as executive assistant to the president of Bellmore, a promotional products company. When Bellmore was acquired, Elaine was tasked with transferring business data to the new company – after which her role would become obsolete.

Since the president was not staying on, he offered Elaine his remaining clients, including the Marriott Marquis Hotel. She accepted the offer, which fit her need for flexibility, as her future depended on where Glenn would do his residency.

From Modest Beginnings to Big Achievements

Elaine was referred to a partner from Ernst & Young (E&Y). No one wanted to travel to Manhattan for a small order – so Elaine went.

She began with that tiny order of 50 portfolios for E&Y and expanded it into a thriving promotional products business. Elaine developed a line of recruitment merchandise for them, which grew to include half a million dollars’ worth of products shipped worldwide by 1996. Her business generated approximately $3 million in sales each year, between 1996-2000, and she worked with the national recruitment division to maintain consistent branding across 80 offices.

Making her family her #1 priority, Elaine chose to work from home while her children were young. She could feed her babies, go to school events, and return to her home office after bedtime.

When her youngest child began attending school for a longer day, Elaine rented an office nearby that allowed her to get home before the kids. As her business grew, she brought on two assistants.

Elaine is currently the Director of Business Development at PromoShop, specializing in customized branded merchandise and gifts. She has been with the company for ten years, working with her own clients. Elaine brings in clients while PromoShop handles the back office and financing.

This arrangement allows her to maintain a flexible schedule while remaining financially competitive with running her own business. Elaine can focus exclusively on her clients and finding the perfect products for them – which is what she truly loves.

Community

Elaine has contributed her energy, ideas, and passion to the boards of Hillel Yeshiva (for 15 years) and more recently for PROPEL, whose mission is to empower women to earn, thrive, and lead. “There are so many talented and resourceful women in our community,” Elaine said. She has especially enjoyed working on both boards with her close friend, Dr. Gayle Krost, current president of PROPEL, who was also featured in Community.

Elaine’s key to success? “I am diligent, hardworking, and always do right by my clients – and they appreciate that. They say, ‘If Elaine can’t get it done, then nobody can.’” Elaine’s strengths include understanding her clients’ vision for their company and their stakeholders.

To unwind, Elaine enjoys yoga, walking, biking, and hosting Shabbat meals with family.

Advice

A woman can have it all. Life is a juggle, but it can be done. It takes determination, hard work, and a good partnership with your spouse. Glenn and I are always a team.

Connect with Elaine at Eparker@promoshopnyc.com and follow her on Instagram @eparkeratpromoshop.

Ellen Geller Kamaras, CPA/MBA, is an International Coach Federation (ICF) Associate Certified Coach.  Her coaching specialties include life, career, and dating coaching.  Ellen can be contacted at ellen@lifecoachellen.com.