Menucha  Fuchs

Everyone knows that before Yom Kippur we must ask forgiveness from our friends and family members we have hurt. Our prayers to Gd do not help to fix our wrongdoings to our fellow man. But how do we get the courage to ask forgiveness? I messed up with my spouse or friends so much, how can I even ask?

Asking forgiveness is not pleasant, but when you do ask, it shows the other party you wronged that you admit you made a mistake, and you show him you are not proud of your actions, and you regret them. So, although it is difficult, you will feel cleansed after asking forgiveness. Knowing this will help you to garner the courage you need. When asking forgiveness, you demonstrate that you did not maliciously cause harm on purpose, but rather, you were not thinking properly or were not paying attention when you wronged your friend or family member, especially your spouse.

Living with a spouse that is incapable of saying sorry is difficult. The conclusion one draws from such refusal is: “He/she wanted to hurt me and doesn’t care.” As soon as you say you are sorry you clarify that you actually do love them, you had no intention of hurting them, and that what you did or said that was taken as hurtful was by mistake. When you apologize you take a great load off of both of you.

Asking forgiveness from a 10-year-old boy whose foot you stepped on is pretty easy. But asking forgiveness from the same child for speaking meanly about him, either behind his back or to his face, is much harder. Some “sorrys” are easy and spontaneous, and some cause you to approach with trepidation.

There are those who cannot get the word “sorry” out of their mouths, but on the other hand, they do a lot of good deeds. If such a person needs your forgiveness, accept it even if that person attempts to gain forgiveness only through deeds and not through words.

Saying sorry can repair broken relationships. Where two people have kept a distance from each other because of something that happened, saying sorry can help them to get back on track.

When someone asks you for forgiveness, be open to accept it. If you close the door on your friend he may never come back and ask for forgiveness again and you may lose a friend. How can you refuse him? He went the distance, overcoming his internal opposition and discomfort, and came to ask forgiveness. Let’s remember we could be in his shoes. How can  we be so brazen to ask forgiveness if we won’t give it ourselves?

My father, zt’l, who passed away two years ago, used to always ask us siblings to forgive each other. Invariably, one child would say: “But Dad, I didn’t do anything hurt to him!” And my father would answer, “It’s sufficient that he even thought that you did something wrong to him that you should ask his forgiveness. Now, think that maybe you actually did do something to him that you just forgot. So just go ask forgiveness…”

It can be  difficult to say, “I’m sorry.” But when we do, we can come to the synagogue on Yom Kippur feeling purified in all our limbs. We succeeded and we overcame the obstacles in our way, and we did what we were supposed to do. Now we are clean and pure.

Eddie Esses

For years, many believed our community simply didn’t have a meaningful voice in government, that we had no sway over the decisions made on our behalf by those in Albany and City Hall. 

Those days are over.

Recently our community has undergone a political awakening. Through record voter registration and unprecedented civic engagement, we have become a force that politicians cannot ignore. When New York is being pulled further and further to the left by extremists who openly attack our values, our schools, our neighborhoods, and our support for Israel, there has never been more at stake.

This November is not just another election; it is a referendum on the future of our community.

Elections Close to Home

State Senator Sam Sutton is seeking re-election in the 22nd Senate District, while his Chief of Staff, Joey Saban, is running for the State Assembly in the 45th District. Their victories would give our community something new – strong, unapologetic representation in both chambers of the New York State Legislature.

And make no mistake – who represents us in Albany matters.

Radical voices are gaining influence in New York. Politicians aiming to weaken law enforcement, slash support for Israel, impose policies that threaten religious institutions, and prioritize ideological agendas over public safety are becoming louder and more powerful. While ordinary families worry about anti-Semitism, rising crime, and the future of their children’s education, too many elected officials are focused on appeasing activists and political extremists.

This November voters must consider who will stand up and fight back?

Sam Sutton and Joey Saban

Sam Sutton already has.

When anti-Semitic incidents have exploded across New York, Senator Sutton led the fight to establish protective buffer zones around houses of worship, ensuring that families can attend synagogue without fear of intimidation. He helped secure nearly $20 million in security funding for yeshivas and Jewish schools from Governor Hochul and delivered millions of dollars more for our community institutions.

These are real victories that have made our community safer and stronger.

Behind many of those victories has been Joey Saban.

Joey has worked alongside Senator Sutton every step of the way, helping write legislation, secure funding, and advocate for our community. Unlike politicians who suddenly appear every election season asking for votes, Joey has already spent his time fighting for our community in the halls of government. 

Now he takes that fight to the State Assembly.

Joey’s campaign is built around the issues that matter most: combating anti-Semitism, strengthening public safety, supporting the NYPD, protecting yeshivas and private education, increasing security funding for schools and synagogues, and standing firmly against extremist and socialist policies that threaten our community.

We Need Representation

But perhaps the most important reason this election is so important is because we need our voice represented in the majority conference in Albany. New York is overwhelmingly controlled by Democrats. Unfortunately, members of the minority party are not able to accomplish anything in Albany and their voices are considered meaningless. Real change will not come from politicians shouting from the sidelines, it will come from strong voices inside the majority who are willing to challenge their own party when it embraces dangerous ideas.

Joey Saban would immediately become one of the strongest moderate voices in Albany, willing to stand up to the growing influence of the Democratic Socialists and politicians like Zohran Mamdani who seek to push New York in a radically different direction. Joey would be a voice for common sense, public safety, religious freedom, and unwavering support for Israel.

Together, Sam Sutton and Joey Saban would create an extremely powerful partnership capable of fighting for our community’s priorities in both houses of the Legislature.

Taking a Stand

The extremist forces reshaping New York are organized, motivated, and determined. The only question is whether we will match their energy and determination.

This November, every vote is a statement. Every volunteer matters. Every conversation counts.

The future of our schools, our synagogues, our neighborhoods, and our community’s place in New York politics will not be decided by pundits or activists, it will be decided by the people who show up on Election Day.

For the first time in a generation, we have an opportunity not simply to participate in government, but to help shape it.

The question is whether we are willing to seize it.

This article is adapted from a conversation on the SIMHA Video Series with Dr. Avi Muschel, a clinical psychologist specializing in dating and relationships.

By SIMHA Health

Dating today can feel like a high-stakes, pressure-packed maze. Whether you are stepping out on your very first date, working with a matchmaker, or going out for a while, it is easy to feel overwhelmed. Between the dreams of certain lifestyles and societal pressure to hit specific milestones, the true purpose of dating easily gets lost in the shuffle.

Real connection isn’t about executing a flawless strategy or finding someone who looks perfect on paper. Building a lasting partnership requires self-awareness, an appreciation for mutual growth, and the courage to show up as your authentic self.

Step 1: Flip the Checklist

When asked what they are looking for in a partner, most people quickly pull out a long mental checklist: character traits, religious goals, or career ambitions. While values matter, focusing solely on the other person skips a critical first step: knowing yourself.

Before asking who your ideal partner should be, turn the mirror inward and ask: Who am I?

A powerful exercise Dr. Muschel suggests is flipping the traditional checklist on its head. Instead of writing down five qualities you want in a spouse, sit down with a piece of paper and write four or five things that your future spouse will be looking for in you.

Are they looking for someone grounded, funny, religiously ambitious, or calm?

If answering that question feels difficult, it is a sign to step back from the noise and take time to understand your own identity before trying to integrate someone else into it.

Step 2: Look for a Match, Not a Resume

It is easy to treat dating like a business transaction, trading one set of desirable traits for another. But a successful marriage is never built on a resume match.

There is no universal “great” partner; there is only a good match for you.

Matters of the heart are wonderfully unpredictable. You might meet someone who checks every box on paper, yet feel little to no connection. On the other hand, you might click deeply with someone who completely contradicts what you thought you wanted.

More importantly, who you are at 20 will inevitably evolve by the time you are 30, 40, or 50. Rather than searching for static perfection right now, focus on finding someone with shared core values who is committed to learning, adapting, and growing alongside you as life changes.

Step 3: The Risk (and Power) of Vulnerability

The deepest relationships require genuine vulnerability.

When you pretend to be someone you aren’t, whether about your confidence, your job, your finances, or your religious standing, you build a relationship between two fake personas. Those masks might get along fine, but the actual individuals remain total strangers.

Opening up happens gradually, like peeling back layers one at a time. It requires taking a real risk: the chance that showing your authentic self leaves you open to rejection. But that risk is the only way to build a real foundation. When you allow someone to see the real you and they accept you, it creates the most powerful bond possible.

You Don’t Have to Navigate It Alone

Navigating self-awareness, dating anxiety, and emotional openness isn’t always easy to do on your own. Naturally, your first line of support is often a mentor, parent, rabbi, teacher, or another trusted person in your life. However, if you still find yourself stuck in repeating patterns, feeling overwhelmed by the process, or needing more guidance on your relationship journey, SIMHA is here to help.

As a dedicated mental health referral organization, SIMHA can connect you with experienced professionals, like Dr. Avi Muschel, to help you build clarity, confidence, and the right support for your specific path. Reach out to SIMHA today to take the next step: 718-675-3000.

QUESTION:

Dear Rabbi  Ali,

I am hoping you can give me some advice on how to make the most out of the Shabbat meals. I would love for my husband to say divrei Torah and sing zemirot. He usually falls asleep as soon as the meal starts. The kids are running around and not involved much. We usually argue and that doesn’t help.

R’ ALI’S RESPONSE:

We all picture a home filled with zemirot, divrei Torah, lively conversation, and children absorbing the warmth and holiness of the day. Those moments become cherished memories, and it’s understandable that you long to create them for your family.

At the same time, it helps to remember that every Shabbat table has its own reality. The picture we imagine is often different from what unfolds in real life, and that doesn’t necessarily mean something is wrong.

You mention that your husband is usually very tired and dozes off as soon as the meal starts. Before viewing this as a lack of interest in Shabbat, consider what may be behind that exhaustion. Many husbands – and wives as well – work incredibly hard throughout the week. They carry the responsibility of earning a living, supporting a family, and juggling countless pressures. By the time Friday night arrives, they may be running on empty. Sometimes falling asleep is not a reflection of a person’s priorities, but is simply a reflection of how depleted they are.

Rather than seeing his fatigue as something standing in the way of your ideal Shabbat, try viewing it through the lens of appreciation. The very exhaustion that frustrates you may also be evidence of how hard he has worked for your family all week. Looking at it this way can soften feelings of disappointment and replace them with compassion.

You also mention your children. Every parent wants their children to experience the beauty of Shabbat. But it’s important to remember that children are, first and foremost, children. They are naturally energetic, curious, and often unable to sit quietly through a long meal. Expecting them to behave like mature, attentive adults can lead to frustration for everyone involved.

Here is the most important point. Do not allow one disappointment to create a much bigger problem. If your husband’s tiredness becomes a source of criticism, arguments, or resentment, the attempt to improve Shabbat can unintentionally damage the very peace that Shabbat is meant to bring into the home.

Our rabbis place tremendous value on shalom bayit. A peaceful home is not separate from Shabbat – it is one of its greatest expressions. Sometimes preserving that peace is more spiritually meaningful than insisting everything unfold according to our expectations.

If you would like your husband to share more divrei Torah or sing zemirot, positive reinforcement will almost always accomplish more than criticism can. Notice and appreciate the moments when he does engage, even if they are brief. A sincere comment such as, “I really loved hearing you share that thought,” or, “The children enjoyed when you sang that song,” can be incredibly encouraging. People naturally gravitate toward places where they feel appreciated.

By contrast, repeated reminders, complaints, or comparisons often have the opposite effect. No one wants to come to the Shabbat table feeling that they’re about to be evaluated. Encouragement creates motivation; criticism usually creates resistance.

You might also consider making your expectations more modest. Perhaps one short dvar Torah, one favorite song, or involving the children in simple ways is enough for this stage of your family’s life. As circumstances change and the children mature, your Shabbat table will evolve as well.

The goal of Shabbat is not to produce a perfect performance but to create a home filled with holiness, love, and rest. If your husband feels accepted, your children feel welcome, and your home is peaceful, then you are already giving your family one of the greatest gifts Shabbat has to offer. 

Imagine you’re sitting in the synagogue, or at some event, and a fellow in your row needs to leave.  He stands up and passes your seat.  There’s plenty of room in front of you for him to pass, but in his carelessness, he accidentally steps on your foot.  He politely apologizes, and then continues along his way.

A few minutes later, he comes back.  Once again, as he passes by your seat, he steps on your foot.  And once again, he apologizes.

If you’re a very nice person, you probably won’t say anything, despite your clear displeasure with this guy’s repeated carelessness that is causing your foot to hurt.

But when this fellow stands up to leave a while later, and, for the third time, steps on your foot and apologizes, even if you’re an exceptionally nice, patient and forgiving individual, you are not likely to remain silent – or, for that matter, to remain nice, patient or forgiving…

But Gd does.

“Abundant” Forgiveness

Three times every weekday, we recite in the Amidah prayer a special request for forgiveness, which concludes, “Baruch Ata Hashem, hanun hamarbeh lislo’ah – Blessed are You, O Gd, the gracious One who forgives abundantly.”  Gd is not just forgiving; He is “marbeh lislo’ah” – “abundantly forgiving.”  He is willing to forgive repeatedly.  No matter how many times we “step on His toes,” so-to-speak.  As long as we are sincere in our repentance, He forgives each and every time.

There is a basic truth that we must never overlook – the yetzer hara (evil inclination) doesn’t go away just because we sincerely regretted what we’ve done and asked Gd to forgive us.  The fact that we’ve performed sincere teshuvah (repentance) does not magically eliminate our weaknesses and temptations.  So, if we repeat the same mistake even after repenting, this does not invalidate our initial teshuvah – provided, of course, that our teshuvah was real and genuine, and not mere lip service.  And just as Gd lovingly accepts our sincere repentance the first time, He lovingly accepts our sincere repentance the second time, and the third.  As our Creator, He knows even better than we do that change does not happen instantaneously, that growth is a gradual process, that bad habits take time to break, that the spiritual challenges we face are real, that we really are struggling to do the right thing and to avoid wrongdoing.  And so, He is “marbeh lisloah,” forgiving us “abundantly” while patiently waiting for us to make the permanent changes that we ought to make.

The “Tzadik” and the “Rasha”

For most readers, I imagine, the point we just made is not new.  This is something that most of us have learned and heard, probably numerous times, especially during this season of the Yamim Noraim (High Holidays).  But here is something which, I believe, is not said often enough: The recognition of this idea marks the fundamental difference between a tzadik (righteous person) and a rasha (sinful person).

Too many people have a grave misconception about who a tzadik is, and what being a tzadik means.  They think that a tzadik is somebody who was born with a uniquely spiritual DNA, who is naturally wired differently, with an instinctive drive to act righteously and avoid sin.  They view a tzadik as somebody who is all but incapable of mistakes and failures, and who therefore always gets it right.

This might be how some biographies of great sages depict them, but this is not how King Shlomo depicts them.  In the Book of Mishleh (24:16), King Shlomo tells us the secret to being a tzadik: “Ki sheva yipol tzadik vekam – For seven times does a righteous person fall and then rise.”

The tzadik isn’t somebody who never makes mistakes.  He is somebody who makes mistakes and then gets back up.  Who doesn’t feel discouraged after making a mistake.  Who doesn’t feel that Gd hates him because of his mistakes.  Who doesn’t conclude that his mistakes mean he can never be good again, or can never earn Gd’s favor again.  Who sees a mistake as something to learn from, and not something to be ruined by.  Who understands that Gd forgives the first time, the second time, the third time, and even the seventh time.

King Shlomo continues: “ursha’im yikashelu bera’ah – the wicked stumble through wrongdoing.”  Whereas the righteous person gets up, the rasha (wicked person) allows his wrongdoing to keep him down permanently. 

A rasha isn’t an inherently evil person.  To the contrary, sinfulness often results from misguided piety.  A person makes a mistake, perhaps several, and maybe repeats them, and is then overcome by feelings of shame.  He decides that this mistake defines him and defines his future.  That Gd is no longer interested in his mitzvot, no longer cares about him, and will no longer accept his prayers.  He sees himself as a permanent failure, and so he doesn’t bother trying anymore.

Feeling so ashamed of one’s wrongdoing that he feels hopelessly rejected by Gd is not piety.  It is a denial of the prayer text instituted by the great sages and prophets of the early Second Commonwealth: “Hamarbeh lislo’ah.” 

This might strike many as counterintuitive, but it is true, and it is critically important.  The person who feels confident and beloved by Hashem even after sinning is the tzadik.  The person who feels despised by Hashem after sinning is the rasha.  The tzadik responds to failure by getting back up and resolving to keep trying; the rasha responds to failure by giving up.

Repentance Out of Love

In a famous passage, the Gemara (Yoma 86b) makes an astounding remark about teshuvah.

It teaches that if one repents miyir’ah – out of fear, frightened that he will otherwise be punished for his misdeeds, then his repentance has the effect of transforming his intentional misdeeds into unintentional misdeeds, such that he is forgiven.  But if a person repents me’ahavah – out of love, then his repentance goes even further – turning his misdeeds into sources of merit.  Astonishing as it sounds, teshuvah has the ability to turn our sins into mitzvot – such that we are actually rewarded for our mistakes!

How exactly does one perform “teshuvah me’ahavah,” and how can this possibly bring reward for wrongdoing?

The answer might be rooted in our discussion above.

When we contemplate the great gift of teshuvah, and Gd’s boundless compassion, we cannot but be overcome by feelings of love for him.  No technology will ever be created to enable us to travel back in time and change our past, yet this is what Hashem does.  Even when we’ve acted wrongly, intentionally, knowing full well that we are violating His word, He is willing to make the act disappear from history.  And He is willing to do so even the second time, and the third, and the fourth.  How can we not love Gd after contemplating His unlimited kindness?  When we reflect on our negative behaviors, on all our failings, and then think of how Hashem is prepared to “delete” it all – we are filled with feelings of love and a desire to draw close to Him.

It then turns out that our wrongdoing brought us close to Gd, it was the trigger that inspired us with love and drove us to seek to enhance our relationship with Him.  And so Gd, in His infinite mercy, turns our sins into merits.  If we use our sins as a catalyst to change, as a force that brings us closer to Gd, then they become sources of great merit for us.

This explains why, according to several leading sages, teshuvah me’ahavah enables one to earn atonement even for the most grievous sins.  The Rambam delineates different categories of sins, and explains what is required to achieve atonement for each category.  For certain misdeeds, one earns atonement immediately after repentance, whereas others require additional means of expiation.  The gravest sins are those which cause a hillul Hashem (defamation of Gd), bringing shame to the Torah or to the Jewish People, and they can be atoned only through the combination of repentance, punishments and death.  Some rabbis, however, maintain that this entire system applies only to repentance performed out of fear.  When one repents me’ahavah, out of genuine love, he achieves complete atonement even for the severest misdeeds.

In light of what we have seen, we understand why.  If a wrongful act becomes a catalyst for growth, then no matter how egregious the sin, it becomes a source of merit, not to mention that it is entirely forgiven.

There’s a saying in the business world: Every problem is an opportunity.  A successful businessman knows that when some challenge arises, when he confronts a crisis that threatens to destroy the enterprise, this is often a precious opportunity for growth.  The need to address the problem and adapt accordingly can end up catapulting the business to greater heights than it had reached before the crisis surfaced.

This is true also in the “business” of spirituality.  Being a tzadik means viewing every setback and every failure as a golden opportunity to become even better than before, to draw even closer to Gd that one had been before the fall.  If this is our response to failure, then we turn our failures into successes; our misdeeds become sources of merit.

May we all seize the precious opportunity presented by these special days to use the mistakes of our past to create a far more beautiful future for ourselves, our families, our community, and the entire Jewish Nation, amen.

Pnina Souid

Tony (not his real name) found himself driving in Williamsburg when suddenly – boom! – his car bumped into the car of a local chassid.

A former U.S. marine and current personal trainer, Tony not only looked formidable with his broad shoulders and impressive biceps, but he also had a temper, which he knew how to keep in check. When the man got out of his car, he began screaming at Tony.

“Look!” the man demanded. “Look at this dent! Look at this scratch you made in my car! Why didn’t you watch where you were going?!” You could almost see the steam coming out of his ears beneath his payos.

Tony flashed back to his time in Vietnam. As he felt the trauma rising, he felt like responding aggressively. Instead, he took a deep breath. “Baruch Hashem it wasn’t worse,” he said in an even tone.  “It’s just a scratch and a dent; it’s not your life. This is not something to get so upset about.”

Baruch Hashem

The man stopped in his tracks. He recognized that Tony was clearly not Jewish. “What did you say?” the man asked, incredulous. Did you say, “Baruch Hashem? Where in the world did you get that?!”

Tony explained that he learned those words at the gym, where he works as a personal trainer. The gym is owned by Mike Cohen, known as the Mitzvah Man. Tony learned from Mike’s Jewish clients that everything in your life comes from Hashem, so no there’s no need to ever get upset. When someone asks them how business is going they answer “Baruch Hashem it’s good.” When they get to work late, they say, “Baruch Hashem, at least I got to work.”  Anything that you might complain about, they do not. They just say, “Baruch Hashem.”

The man was astonished.

He said, “You work at a gym as a personal trainer, right? What’s the name of the gym?” Tony replied, “Mike’s Gym.”

Immediately, the man said, “Incredible! I see you are familiar with Jews. I and my 17 Chassidishe friends are looking for a personal trainer. Could we hire you to train us?”

“Of course!” Tony responded with a smile. He booked all 18 new clients.

Lessons Learned

Mike Cohen gives us the recap of this story’s lessons:

1. The non-Jewish personal trainer gave this Jewish man mussar – teaching him that everything is from Hashem
2. Tony booked all 18 clients, which would earn him a significant sum. And he saw how Hashem rewarded him right away.
3. The clients at my gym made a tremendous a kiddush Hashem without even realizing it.

When you praise and thank Hashem you never know who is listening and will learn from it.

Make a kiddush Hashem, say, “Baruch Hashem.”

Morris Schweky

When I made aliyah to Tzfat (Safed) six and a half years ago, I could not have imagined the life that awaited me. 

I grew up in Brooklyn’s SY community, surrounded by family and tradition, where everyone knows how to show up for one another. When I was eighteen, my mother and I started Stitches, a needlepoint business that became a familiar part of the Syrian community. We ran it together for fifteen years, getting to know our customers and helping them turn their ideas into one-of-a-kind pieces. Moving to Israel meant stepping away from work I loved and had put my heart and soul into, to begin again in the Holy Land. 

My Israel Experience

Three and a half years after making aliyah, I met my wife. We settled in northern Israel and were married one month before October 7th. We have since been blessed with a beautiful baby girl, and much of our family life has unfolded against the background of war. 

Like so many communities up north, Tzfat changed dramatically after October 7th. Tourism disappeared, businesses struggled, and daily life revolved around uncertainty, sirens, and bomb shelters. After working from home for so long, my wife and I agreed that I needed a change of atmosphere and a renewed sense of purpose. 

That was when I was introduced to Mordechai Kaplan, who was managing Beit Binyamin. At first, I thought I had found a job. Over time, I realized Hashem had opened a door I never expected. 

Enter Beit Binyamin

Beit Binyamin was created by Jen and Rob Airley of Beit Shemesh (originally from NY and the UK, respectively) after the loss of their beloved son, Sergeant Binyamin Meir Airley, H’yd, who fell in Gaza on November 18, 2023 (5 Kislev 5784), at just 21 years old, only a little more than a month after the war began.  

Before Binyamin’s passing, the Airley’s purchased a beautiful property in Tzfat with plans to make an Airbnb. Their overwhelming grief transformed that vision into a retreat home for soldiers and their families, a place where people carrying the weight of war could rest, reconnect, and begin to heal. In the process, it also became a source of livelihood for local tradespeople, artists, caterers, cleaners, and small businesses throughout Tzfat.  

The house, with its ancient stone walls and beautiful pergola overlooking Meron, has a peace that is difficult to describe. It feels both like an escape and like home.

The Story Unfolds  

As I became more involved, I met parents mourning children who had fallen defending Am Yisrael and soldiers arriving straight from the Lebanon front, grateful for a few days of rest, music, conversation, and good food.  

Standing among them, I realized I had been invited into a much bigger story. 

For the first time, Israel’s war was no longer something I was watching. It had become something that allowed me the privilege to serve Am Yisrael in my own way. 

Before Passover, after a major cleanup of the property, I was offered the role of House Manager. My job was to prepare the house for each event and welcome every soldier and family. The position connected naturally with my background, but at Beit Binyamin those practical skills came to serve something far more meaningful. 

A few days before Lag BaOmer, a group of soldiers arrived for an intensive three-day retreat. We filled those days with shiurim, music, spa treatments, meals, and an atmosphere of genuine unity.

Precious Pages Turned into Song

After the retreat, Mordechai asked me to dispose of papers left behind from one of the shiurim. When I brought them to the genizah, I noticed handwritten notes on the back.  

The question at the top read: “Why do we fight?”

Three soldiers had poured out their hearts. I could not throw those pages away. 

For nearly two hours I stood beside the genizah, reading and rereading their words. I realized there was a song hidden in those pages. I began writing, building the lyrics from their reflections, and “Soldiers of Truth” took shape. 

When I shared it with Mordechai and the Airleys, they immediately understood these words deserved to be heard. Binyamin’s longtime counselor, mentor, and friend, Shlomo Lipman, himself a soldier, graciously agreed to sing and produce the song. 

As I grew closer to Jen and Rob, I also felt I was getting to know Binyamin. I heard about his mischievousness, his aspirations, and his determination to become a better person. One soul changed the course of an entire family, and through that family he continues to inspire a nation.

Then another part of the story unfolded. 

A Painting Takes Flight

While scrolling through a WhatsApp art group, I came across a heartfelt video from an artist asking for help. One of her paintings, Kiddush HaShem, had been copied and reposted on X by a vicious anti-Semite who hoped to mock the work, the artist, and the message behind it. Instead, the post introduced the painting to more than 2.7 million people. Rather than hide, she encouraged people to keep sharing it, believing that truth would travel farther than hatred. 

When the painting was revealed, my heart stopped. It showed an Israeli soldier making kiddush over a cup of wine. I immediately knew it belonged at Beit Binyamin. 

The artist was Jordana Hanono, a talented member of the SY community from New York. Since October 7th, she had devoted herself to painting Israeli soldiers and donated her first year’s collection to support Israel’s war effort.  

Learning that Jordana was also from the SY community made the connection even more meaningful. Here was someone from our own community using her gifts to stand up for Am Yisrael through art. 

Once Jen understood the story behind the painting, she immediately saw what I saw. This was more than an image of a soldier. It was an image of Jewish identity, sacrifice, faith, and the longing to return home for Shabbat. 

It felt only natural that kiddush Hashem would become the cover artwork for Soldiers of Truth. A painting inspired by Israeli soldiers now embraces a song born from the reflections of Israeli soldiers. Though they have never met, they are telling the same story.  

Today, kiddush Hashem hangs at Beit Binyamin, greeting the very soldiers and families whose experiences inspired both the painting and the song.  

The soldiers, the song, and Jordana’s artwork all tell the same story: each is fighting for Am Yisrael in its own way. 

The Essence of Beit Binyamin

To me, that connection captures everything Beit Binyamin represents: grieving parents who transformed unimaginable loss into purpose, soldiers who continue to inspire through their courage, an artist from our SY community using her talent to fight anti-Semitism, and a fellow member of the SY community from Brooklyn who somehow found himself helping bring their stories together.  

Every time I open the doors of Beit Binyamin, I meet another soldier, another grieving parent, or another family searching for strength. I see how Binyamin’s life continues through every retreat, every meal, every conversation, every song, and every work of art.  

I am deeply grateful to Hashem for bringing me here. What I thought was simply a new job became an opportunity to witness courage, kindness, sacrifice, and faith in ways that continue to shape me every day. 

To my fellow members of the SY community, I hope you’ll visit Beit Binyamin and experience this remarkable place for yourselves. I would be honored to welcome you and share some of the extraordinary stories that continue to unfold within its walls. Whether by visiting, supporting our mission, making a donation, or simply sending words of encouragement to the soldiers and families who pass through our doors, you can become part of their story as well.  

I came looking for a job. Instead, Hashem brought me to a place where stories meet. 

For that, I am forever grateful. 

Contact Beit Binyamin at [email protected].