Victor Cohen

If you did not make it to the Park Avenue Synagogue (Congregation Ohel Simha) fundraising event this past August 31st in Long Branch, NJ, you missed out on something special. The event, dedicated to raising funds for the synagogue’s expansion, was hosted in the beautiful backyard of Lauren and Ike Levy. 

An Evening to Remember 

Everyone who attended was warmly greeted by the former shul president, Michael Fallas, who presented each person with a beautiful book about Ohel Simha, detailing its history and highlighting the reasons for its needed expansion.  

As the guests entered they were treated to the music of a live band, led by renowned hazzan David Shiro. The lovely scenery and twinkling lights made for a festive atmosphere. No community event is complete without special food, and attendees were not disappointed, as the bountiful spread of different delicacies were pleasing to every palate.   

The he  program opened with a special award presented to Ike Levy, the shul president. Ike was honored for his “unparalleled leadership, mastership, and dedication” to Ohel Simha’s expansion project.

Inspiring Speeches 

The speeches and video highlighted the importance of the expansion project, the pressing need to accommodate the growing numbers in the shul, and the importance of giving back to the community.  

The first speaker was Rabbi Meyer Yedid. He spoke about hearing a bat kol, a Heavenly voice. There have been individuals who were able to pick up on a bat kol and acted upon that voice, to build and to support our community however they could. Rabbi Yedid said, “There are some people out there, special, great people, that get involved. They don’t just know what’s going on, but make what’s going on.” Rabbi Yedid noted that the night was not about a specific need in the community that would serve only specific people. Rather, the event was about Ohel Simcha, which serves the entire community. 

Rabbi Yedid then  spoke about the perek in Tehillim, “Hanukat Habayit” for the Beit Hamikdash, David Hamelech composed this psalm although he himself did not build the Beit Hamikdash. How could he write a psalm celebrating something that was not yet built? Rabbi Yedid answered that David did the very most he could, in terms of creating the blueprints and securing the location. If you do the most that you can for a project, it is as if you yourself finished it. It is as if it became yours. “The Beit Hamikdash was named after a man who wasn’t even alive when it was complete. Why? Because he did everything he could while alive to make it complete.” 

Rabbi Yedid concluded with praise for the Sephardic community, which is growing in both quality and quantity. He emphasized the importance of becoming involved now, and doing so in the best way that you can, not just for yourself, but for your children. He asked those gathered, “What prouder thing could we say to our children than we built the building?” 

Rabbi Shmuel Choueka, the next speaker, smiled as he spoke of the shul as a space that is always bustling, both night and day. He said, “The parking lot is jammed. If I come in the morning at 6am I’m late!” 

Rabbi Choueka spoke about the nature of kedusha. He quoted from the gemara, saying that if you made part of something holy, then the holiness spreads through the object and envelops it. So too, with the community, kedusha can spread out from a single point and ripple through everyone and everything it surrounds. This highlighted the importance of what Ohel Simcha is fundraising for. How much greater would the community be overall if Park Avenue could expand and exude more kedusha? It would benefit everybody. 

Book Dedicated to Ohel Simha’s Past and Future 

Many in attendance commented on the inspiring book that was handed out. Included was the beautiful story behind the founding of the Park Avenue Synagogue. In July 1989, four sons, Mal, Eddie, Jack, and Mike Mamiye a”h, were looking to honor the memory of their beloved mother, Simha Mamiye Dabbah a”h. They transformed the local minyan into Congregation Ohel Simha.  

With Gd’s help, the community flourished and Park Avenue Synagogue has become the thriving center of Torah and prayer that it is today. The book included some of the history of the Sephardic community, and noted the reverence the community has for our rabbis and the important role they play. 

The Legacy Wall 

The book also describes Park Avenue’s newest initiative to honor community rabbis – The Legacy Wall. “Through the Legacy Wall we pay homage to our revered Rabbis who have guided us and nurtured us, ensuring that their impact endures for generations to come. It will serve as a testament to the enduring spirit of our community and our commitment to preserving our heritage.” 

The Legacy Wall rabbis include Rabbi Avraham Hamra, Rabbi Yom-Tov Yedid, Rabbi Jacob S. Kassin, Rabbi Shaul J. Kassin, Rabbi Hacham Baruch Ben-Haim, Rabbi Shlomo Diamond, Rabbi Hacham Sion Maslaton, and Rabbi Shmuel Choueka. These esteemed rabbis have helped to shape and support our community. Their guidance was critical for the community as it grew and prospered. The Legacy Wall is a fitting tribute and a show of sincere hakarat hatov. 

The book closes with several pictures of what will be in the future, with Gd’s help – from a new social hall to a larger Torah Center, and even a ladies mikveh. 

Final Speech and Conclusion 

The final speaker was Ike Levy. He spoke about the practical aspects of the expansion project. He said Ohel Simha has “no other option other than to expand the building.” An expansion will allow the shul to serve the growing community and the growing interest in learning Torah. Ike discussed the next phase, which will be an expansion of the learning room and the creation of a second floor to ensure that their morning and night programs could keep growing. The community is growing and Ohel Simha is dedicated to meeting the needs of the community. He noted, “We’re a shul that accommodates the entire community.” 

After Ike spoke, the evening concluded with an inspiring, beautifully done video. 

People left with a sense of achdut, and with a feeling of increased commitment to support Ohel Simha. Despite the incredible amount of hard work that went into the event, Ike’s wife, Lauren, said simply, “It’s an honor to host this beautiful event for the benefit of the shul.”  Certainly, those in attendance felt honored to participate.

Albert has a tough dilemma that is keeping him up at night: His elderly mother’s health is deteriorating, requiring her to receive round-the-clock care. She wants to move in with Albert. Miri, Albert’s wife, loves her mother-in-law very much, but she is worried that their house is too small and is also concerned that having Albert’s mother move in will stress their marriage and negatively affect their shalom bayit. Miri suggests sending her mother-in-law to a nearby nursing home instead. Albert asked me what should he do – listen to Miri or his mother? 

The decision to invite an elderly parent to move in with a child or instead reside in a nursing home is a complex issue, requiring carefully considering the balance between the mitzva of kibud av va’em with shalom bayit. The obligation to honor parents extends beyond mere words; it encompasses actions and deeds. The Fifth Commandment: “Honor your father and your mother” (Shemot 20:12) includes the obligation to provide for a parent’s needs, including food, clothing, and even health care. But even while the obligation to honor one’s parents is paramount, shalom bayit is also the cornerstone of Judaism and Hashem’s holy Name is erased for the sake of shalom bayit (Sukkah 53a). So, what does Albert do if this mitzva comes at the expense of his wife Miri’s concerns?  

Take into Consideration 

There are a few matters to consider. If Albert’s mother requires professional medical care and round-the-clock supervision, it may very well be that Albert’s family does not have the ability to care for her at home. A suitable nursing home may be the more reasonable option, providing it can meet all of her medical needs and offer professional care and safety. On the other hand, being cared for by family in their home is often more comforting and provides the elderly parent with a loving home, something that cannot be easily replicated elsewhere. Sending a parent to a nursing home should therefore not be done simply out of convenience or to relieve a sense of personal responsibility, especially if this will cause emotional distress to the parent.  

Hacham Yitzchak Yosef, Shlit”a, writes that whenever possible, one should try to care for parents in one’s home. However, if there are space constraints or bringing a parent into the home may cause friction and marital strife, shalom bayit takes precedence (Yalkut Yosef, Dinim Laisha, 52:5, based on S.A. E.H. 74:10).  

Considering the general preference to care for a parent at home whenever possible, if a child is faced with the challenge that doing so may lead to conflicts with one’s spouse, it is important to recognize that there are many different options for possibly making things easier. Examples include employing a full-time caregiver in the home, enlisting the support of other family members, and modifying the home environment to accommodate the parent’s needs. Ultimately, the goal should be to balance the sacred duty of kibud av va’em by ensuring the parent’s well-being while maintaining one’s shalom bayit.  

Rabbinic Advice 

Because the Shulchan Aruch (Y.D. 240:5 and Beit Yosef ibid) rules that a child need not spend their own funds to fulfill the mitzvah of kibud av va’em, if a parent does need to live in a nursing home, the costs should be borne by the parent. If the parent cannot afford to pay and the children have enough funds, the children should pay. However, if the children are unable to afford this, they can use their tzedaka funds to support their parents (ibid).  

In a situation where the parent has sufficient funds but is unwilling to pay, Hacham Yitzchak rules that the children should use their own funds but can later be reimbursed from the inheritance. That said, it is best to first speak with a rabbi to avoid any potential issues, as inheritance law is fraught with halachic and emotional challenges. 

In grappling with the decision of placing a parent in a nursing home, it is essential for families to seek guidance from knowledgeable halachic authorities. Rabbis can provide personalized guidance, taking into account the specific circumstances of the family and the parent’s condition. Each situation is unique and there may be different approaches based on factors such as the parent’s health condition, the availability of other caregivers, financial considerations, the overall well-being of the family unit, and balancing kibud av vaem and shalom bayit. 

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer, and writer on medical halacha, and is the head of the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. His latest book is Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome. To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com.

Victor Cohen 

Over 100 Oraysa learners gathered together on September 6th for a festive celebration in honor of the completion, “siyum,” of the tractate of gemara Rosh Hashana at Kol Yaakov Synagogue in Brooklyn.  

What Is the Oraysa Program? 

The Oraysa Amud V’Chazara Program was founded just three years ago to promote gemara learning and retention for learners of all levels, and to give them the tools to succeed. There are already 5,000 learners participating in 115 “chaburas” (learning groups) in 30 cities around the world, including places as far-flung as Phoenix, Jerusalem, Zurich, London, and New York. 

Participants in the “daf yomi” program cover a full two-sided blat (page or “daf” of gemara) each day, seven days a week. The Oraysa program focuses on slower, more comprehensive learning and review, with participants learning one amud (one side of a page of gemara) Sunday through Thursday, reviewing the previous day’s learning each day, and on Friday and Shabbat the participants review the last five days of learning – two-and-a-half blat. Learners test their retention with regular bechinot (tests). It is possible to apply for a stipend, as well. 

Learners can access the daily shiurim via the Oraysa website, email podcasts, or call-in hotline. They can network with other learners worldwide. As their website states, “The beauty of this program is its versatility and ability to be tailored to the level of each participant.” 

A Night to Remember 

The siyum was a true tribute to Torah learning, complete with a delicious array of food, a professional singer, joyous dancing, and, of course, speeches. Attendees engaged in spirited discussions, as each chabura group sat together. The esteemed rabbis in attendance were seated at the front.  

It was a special feeling for the learners to have completed the masachet of Rosh Hashana so close to the holiday. They had, indeed, toiled in Torah learning, studying, reviewing, and mastering the material together. This requires a strong level of commitment on the part of each participant. One of the things that helps keep these learners going is the shared commitment to the endeavor, and the spirit of engaging in a holy project with other Jews. This creates a special camaraderie for the participants, who are dedicated to the same goals of in-depth gemara learning and retaining what they learned.  

Honored Rabbis   

The community rabbis in attendance were Rabbis Eli and David Mansour, Rabbi Nathan Escava, and Rabbi David Ozeri. Representing Oraysa were Rabbi Shlomo Yehuda Shuster, Rabbi Aharon Gobioff, and Rabbi Chaim Zell. 

The first speaker, Rabbi David Mansour, focused on how the Oraysa program is perfectly suited for the community, which includes many different people with different levels of learning. Oraysa, through the resources on their website and their monthly newsletters, as well as the sense of togetherness they offer through the schedule, is able to cater to each and every member of our community, each on their own level. And, the rabbi said, “B”H, each one on their level is growing tremendously.” 

Rabbi Eli Mansour delivered a beautiful dvar Torah about the word “oraysa” from a pasuk in the Torah. He gleaned that from the specific placement of the word that oraysa is what allows us to properly connect with Hashem. Then he asked: what is the point of learning? He explained that learning tis not simply an exercise in analytical ability. Rather, the point of learning is in order to reach a new level of closeness with Hashem. He said, “The purpose is to reach a level called debekut. Debekut means attachment, closeness, to Hakadosh Baruch Hu.”  

Rabbi Nathan Escava was honored with making the ritual siyum. He told the audience that it would take 20 years to complete shas through Oraysa’s program, which on the one hand is a long time. On the other hand, 20 years can go by in the blink of an eye. He continued, “Imagine we had Oraysa 20 years ago. We could have finished shas by now! This program enables us, day by day, to learn an amud, to gain ground. It brings the best out of everyone.” He said that on Rosh Hashanah we can tell Hashem: “We’re in this for the next twenty years. Give us 20!” 

A Fitting Closing  

After Rabbi Escava completed the siyum, the music started and attendees headed to the dance floor for lively dancing. Clearly, the learners were filled with the special joy of a significant accomplishment. And there was a real feeling of achdut for these men who had learned together with a common goal. The excitement on the dance floor was palpable.  

Rabbi Ozeri’s speech concluded the evening after the dancing. He discussed the concept of how things work in Olam Haba. There, in the Next World, everyone who has completed shas gets a “seat.” However, not everyone will get the same seat. He said that the type of effort you put into your learning in this world will determine the type of seat you get in the next one. He used a sports stadium metaphor to illustrate his point, calling the best seats in Olam Haba the “box seats.” He looked out at the audience and  said that Oraysa learners will get the box seats in Olam Haba, and that the learning Oraysa has done and will continue to do is strong enough to take them far into Olam Haba. It was an inspiring message and a perfect end to a wonderful evening. 

Start Your Own Chabura 

What better way is there to start the new year than making a commitment to daily learning? Oraysa’s website includes a page where you can set up a chabura of your own. An Oraysa chabura is simply a group of people who want to learn the daily amud together. To create a chabura, just fill out the form, Oraysa will get the ball rolling. They make setting up a new group easy and convenient. They believe that the best way to learn is to do so with others, and their goal is to make it possible wherever there is an interest. Find them at oraysa.com.

Technological advances in the 20th century changed our world dramatically. A multitude of discoveries and inventions took us from horse and buggy to automobiles and even to space travel. Communications methods made message couriers obsolete, as we moved into telephone and internet communications. And imagine our world without electricity moving from candlelight to nuclear power! 

Yet, despite the rapid changes in technology, it is amazing how many “experts” failed to recognize the significance of the inventions that have shaped our modern society. Below are some famous quotes from scientists, inventors, business leaders, and media personalities, that illustrate just how wrong some people “in the know” can be. 

“There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home.”  

Ken Olsen, co-founder of Digital Equipment Corporation, 1977 

“I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won’t last out the year.” 

Editor in charge of business books, Prentice Hall, 1957 

“Transmission of documents via telephone wires is possible in principle, but the apparatus required is so expensive that it will never become a practical proposition.” 

Nobel Prize winner, Dennis Gabor, 1962 

“Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau.” 

Irving Fisher (Yale Economics Professor 1929) 

“The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon.” 

Sir John Eric Erichsen, British surgeon, appointed Surgeon-Extraordinary to Queen Victoria, 1873 

“I do not believe the introduction of motor-cars will ever affect the riding of horses.” 

 Mr. Scott-Montague, MP, in 1903 in the United Kingdom  

“When the Paris Exhibition closes electric light will close with it and no more be heard of.” 

Erasmus Wilson, a professor at Oxford University, in 1878. He was skeptical about the future of electric light after seeing it at the Paris Exhibition. 

“Such startling announcements as these should be deprecated as being 

unworthy of science and mischievous to its true progress.” 

Sir William Siemens, 1880, on Edison’s announcement of a successful light bulb 

“We are probably nearing the limit of all we can know about astronomy.” 

Simon Newcomb, astronomer, 1888 

“There is not the slightest indication that nuclear energy will ever be 

obtainable.  It would mean that the atom would have to be shattered at 

will.” 

Albert Einstein, 1932 

“Space travel is bunk.” 

Sir Harold Spencer Jones, Astronomer Royal of Britain, 1957, two weeks before the launch of Sputnik 

“There is practically no chance communications space satellites will be 

used to provide better telephone, telegraph, television, or radio 

service inside the United States.” 

T. Craven, FCC Commissioner, 1961

What is Hosha’na Rabba? 

There are three designated days in the calendar for good judgment, Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur, and Hosha’na Rabba. A judge can sign a court order. However, it will only go into effect when it is handed over to the clerk. On Hosha’na Rabba decisions from Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur are sent out to be delivered. On this day we can beseech Hashem, The Judge, before He hands decrees to His ‘clerks’ to reverse His decision. 

Every day of Sukkot we walk around the Torah with our lulav and etrog in hand, asking Hashem hosha’na – to please bring salvation and goodness throughout the coming year. On the last day of hol hamo’ed Sukkot, as this is the seventh time that we encircle the Torah and is the climax of Sukkot, we ask for salvation and help from Hashem in many ways, namely regarding the crops and rain. This is the why the day is called Hosha’na Rabba – hosha = save, na = please, rabba = great. 

In the times of the Bet Hamikdash, circling the mizbeach with aravot was performed every day of Sukkot once, and on the seventh day – Hosha’na Rabba – seven times. This was so important, that even if it occurred on Shabbat, circling the mizbeach with aravot was still performed in the Bet Hamikdash.  

What do we do that is special on this day?  

1) We study the tikkun throughout the night reviewing the entire Sefer Devarim before midnight and then we recite Tehillim with excerpts of selihot. We recite Hashem Hu HaElokim in Shaharit as we do during the High Holidays.  

2) After Hallel we circle the Torah seven times reciting the hosha’not prayers which are all-encompassing, as will be detailed.  

3) After the tefillah we take a bundle of five aravot and bang it against the dirt. It is customary after banging the aravot to go back inside the bet haknesset, open the hechal, and recite Nishmat Kol Hai until (but not including) the blessing of Yishtabah.  

What is the meaning of the extra hosha’not prayers? 

We circle around the Torah seven times with our lulav and etrog asking “hosha’na” – please help – while mentioning Selihot that upon each segment highlight the merit of one of the seven ushpizin, the first one corresponding to Avraham, the second to Yishak, etc.  

After the seventh circuit, we then build upon the refrain of hosha’na to more and more steps of beseeching, totaling ten steps.  

1. Hosha’na – we open with the core prayer that we have recited every day of Sukkot, asking Hashem to save us.
2. Anna hoshia na – we ask for the rebuilding of the Bet Hamikdash.
3. Ani VaHu hoshia na – we ask for salvation from oppression with the merit of the four species that correspond to parts of our body etrog = heart, lulav = spine, hadasim = eyes, aravot = lips.
4. Anna El na Hosha’na v’hoshia na – we ask for Him to open the bounty of produce, (naming wheat, barley, spelt, oats, rye, rice, millet, beans, lentils, olive trees and their oil, grapes, figs, pomegranates, walnuts, dates, apples, pistachios, almonds, chestnuts, carob, mini fruit, peaches, berries, pears, etrogim, and all types of vegetables and grains).
5. Anna El na hosha’na v’hatsliha na – we ask to be transplanted back in Eretz Yisrael with its full blessings of bounty and water.
6. Anna El na hosha’na v’harviha na Avinu attah – We invoke the merit of Noah, Avraham, Yishak, Yaakov, and Moshe Rabbenu, who found favor in the Eyes of Hashem, and in their merit, we ask Hashem to not withhold blessed rainwater. 
7. Anna El na refa na, selah na, hasha’na v’hoshia na, Avinu attah – we invoke the merit of Noah, Avraham, Yishak, Yaakov, Moshe, and Aharon to have our prayers today be of glory, praise, cherished, etc. to carry us throughout the year.
8. Hoshienu Moshi’enu ki lecha enenu u’lecha lishuatenu – as tomorrow, on Shemini Aseret, we will switch over to ask for rain reciting morid hageshem, we pray for a year of light, blessing, etc. in Aleph Bet order. Here we ask the first four of the Aleph Bet, seemingly introducing and opening the prayer of Shemini Aseret for rain.
9. Ha’El l’mosha’ot am nosha B’Adonai, hosha’na behasdicha meyahalim l’Adonai, ki lishuatecha kivinu Adonai, Adam u’behemah toshia Adonai, ki lishuatecha kivinu Adonai. The yearning for salvation from Hashem is the reason and source of us finding favor in the eyes of Hashem.
10. We then culminate these prayers with beseeching Hashem to herald the final redemption through Eliyahu HaNavi with the recitation of kol mevaser, mevaser v’omer. 

Pnina Souid 

People think it will never happen in their family – until it does, and often, with tragic consequences. 

Drug addiction is exceedingly prevalent in modern society, and our community has not been spared from this scourge that has inflicted so much pain on so many people. The good news is that there are caring, devoted, capable individuals who are working hard to address the problem and provide help. 

Mr. Victor Mann is one of the many community members who found themselves living a life that was not a life. Fortunately, he was able to rebuild himself thanks to a residential rehabilitation program in Israel called Retorno. After having undergone the successful process of rehabilitation, Victor now works for the facility that saved him and so many others who had struggled with drug addiction, gambling addiction, and numerous other addictions that many of us are not even aware of. 

Victor was only 14 years old when tragedy struck his family, with the untimely passing of his father. Without his father to guide him, Victor became rebellious. He was tossed from school to school before he finally landed in a school where he felt at home, an institution for young men who, like him, were challenged. It was here that Victor’s experience with drugs began. He would get together with friends and use recreational drugs, believing that these substances helped make him stronger and better suited to cope with his difficult life. Of course, what he was feeling was a false, delusional sense of security. Victor relied on these drugs – some of which could be obtained with a simple prescription – for ten years. He used drugs to go to sleep, and drugs to wake up. If he needed to feel certain emotions – there were drugs for that, too. 

As he continued feeding his dependency, Victor distanced himself from everyone, and sought out any form of escape from reality, eventually added gambling to his list of addictions. 

He reached the point where he found no purpose or reason for living. Baruch Hashem, Victor reached out to his only friend, through whom he found his way to Retorno, a rehabilitation center in Israel, where he is now employed fulltime, working for the institute’s outreach department. 

The Tragedy, the Letter, and the Open Check 

The story of Retorno begins in Mexico, where a man addicted to cocaine revealed his problem to his friend and rabbi, Rabbi Eitan Eckstein. Rabbi Eckstein was shocked, as this friend was very successful, and seemed to be living a normal, happy, and healthy life. Initially, Rabbi Eckstein thought that the fellow should admit himself to a rehabilitation center, but the man insisted that he should find a therapist, instead.  

That night, the friend’s wife called Rabbi Eckstein in hysterics. Her husband had locked himself in his office. The police were called, and broke through the door. The man was lying there lifeless, killed by a drug overdose. 

Later, a blank check and a letter were discovered. The friend, who left a large fortune, had written to Rabbi Eckstein, requesting that he use the blank check to open a facility to help those suffering from addiction. The man understood that there were many, like him, who desperately needed help, but were afraid of the stigma associated with their condition, and thus decided to keep struggling alone. 

And so, in 1990, Rabbi Eckstein opened Retorno, a rehabilitation facility in Mexico. He then opened a branch in Israel upon returning there several years later. The facility consists of a residential program, and an outpatient clinic designed for those who had previously gone through the residential program. 

Joining a Rehabilitation Community 

Victor Mann traveled to Israel with his mother, and upon arrival, he went straight to a detox center, because patients’ blood must be completely free of toxins before beginning rehabilitation. (Retorno has since opened its own detox center.) His mother, meanwhile, stayed with relatives. Every step of the process was carefully arranged by the outreach agent, Nicole.  

Once Victor was ready to become an inpatient of Retorno and participate in the full residential treatment program, he entered what is called the “kehillah tipulit – treatment community.” The word kehillah, of course, means “community,” referring to a group of likeminded people, united by a common cause or goal. Everyone at Retorno – the social workers, outreach workers and patients – share a commitment to the rehabilitation process of themselves or the patients under their care. 

Situated on a hilltop near Beit Shemesh, Retorno is currently the only fulltime, extensive, addiction rehabilitation program run in strict adherence to halachah. There are separate programs for men and women, with the men’s program being staffed by men, and the women’s program, by women. There is one group for ages 17-24, and another for older patients.  

The program removes the addict from his or her life’s stresses by creating a world unto itself within the kehillah. Everyone in the kehillah is expected to fully participate in communal life, by working in basic maintenance, serving as waiters and cooks, and assuming other responsibilities. 

Retorno’s programs treat not only drug addiction, but also other addictions, such as gambling and alcohol. 

For Victor, Retorno was not only a game-changer, but, quite literally, a life-saver. He was assigned a social worker, and underwent the full range of therapies, which include horse therapy and animal therapy. The program is based on the well-known “12-point program” developed by the legendary and esteemed Hassidic psychiatrist, Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twersky, zt”l. 

Soon after beginning his rehab, Victor decided he wished to permanently settle in Israel. The Retorno staff did everything they could to help him through the aliyah process, including enrolling him in an ulpan program so he could learn Hebrew. 

Retorno encourages patients in the later stages of rehabilitation to find  employment outside the kehillah. As Victor was still in the middle of the process of aliyah, Retorno offered him a volunteer position in their outreach department, which became a paying job once he became an Israeli citizen. 

The “Bar”-Mitzvah 

In an exclusive interview with Community, Rabbi Eckstein described the culture shock he experienced upon arriving in Mexico 35 years ago with his wife and five young children, having been sent from Israel to serve a as a congregational rabbi. He was astonished by the prevalence of drug and alcohol abuse not only among lower-class Mexicans, but also within the upscale Jewish community of Mexico City. He shared the joke made about the community’s “bar”-mitzvah celebrations, which, sadly, place far more emphasis on the “bar” than on the mitzvot… 

The death of his congregant opened his eyes to the gravity to the problem, and he set out to do something about it. Using the open check left by his deceased friend, and other donations, he established Retorno, and then built the facility in Israel after returning there four years later. 

Rabbi Eckstein, who comes from a Mizrachi background, had learned in the famed Ponevitch Yeshiva in Bnei Brak. Upon his return to Israel, he went to ask his illustrious Rosh Yeshiva, Rav Eliezer Shach, zt”l, whether he should take time away from his Torah learning to build this rehabilitation program, which he felt Israel’s haredi community desperately needed. 

Rav Schach replied by asking whether this project was necessary to save lives, and Rabbi Eckstein answered in the affirmative. Rav Shach told him to pursue this endeavor, and was very supportive of Retorno. 

Rabbi Eckstein, a published author, is an expert in the field of addiction treatment. His unique understanding of what addiction is, and the various available treatment methods, has been a game-changer in addressing a problem that has been swept under the proverbial carpet for far too long. His published works include an outreach manual, tackling the challenge of reaching out to an addict. Many addicts deny having a problem, assuming that they solve their problems with their “painkillers” – such as prescription drugs, illegal drugs, gambling, shopping, alcohol, or other addictive behaviors.  Very often, the first and most difficult step is arriving at the realization that these behaviors are not the solution, and instead create a much larger problem. 

Dizziness and Vertigo 

In one of his books, It’s Your Move, Rabbi Eckstein tells of an astute observation made by one of Retorno’s patients, who had served as a fighter pilot in the Israeli Air Force: 

Since starting treatment at Retorno three months ago, I’ve been plagued by a question: What’s the difference between use and abuse? Today I finally got it! It’s the difference between dizziness and vertigo. Both of these conditions are dangerous for a pilot, but they are essentially different. With dizziness, a pilot knows he has a problem. With vertigo, he’s absolutely sure he has no problem.  

Substance use is like dizziness. In the early stages of use, I knew I was a fake. I lied to everyone – my wife, my parents, my friends, and my unit commanders. But I knew I was doing something wrong. However, at some point I stopped feeling bad about what I was doing. Instead I grew confident about my actions and my direction. I had every reason, every excuse to live in a world of drugs and lies. For me, it was the real world…  

This reminded me of an incident that occurred one day during an exercise when our fighter jets were training over the sea.  

At one point, I wanted to distance myself a bit from the sea, so I pulled my plane upward— but without checking my instruments. Suddenly I heard my commander shout that I was diving into the sea! This was the first time I ever experienced vertigo. I was certain that the lights twinkling underneath me were fishing boats and the lights twinkling above me were stars. Nevertheless, I followed protocol; I ignored my feelings and checked my instruments which told me that down was up and up was down.  

I remember the difficulty in acting against my internal reality. To disconnect from what you believe and give control over to a power greater than yourself. It’s scary. It’s hard. It’s insane. But it’s the only way. 

Retorno helps the addict realize that his world of addiction is not real, that the addictive behavior is the wrong solution to a problem which needs to be addressed in healthier ways. 

Horse and animal therapy play an important part of the treatment plan. Horses are very sensitive to their riders, and so by riding a horse, the patient learns how to navigate the road ahead. There is a petting zoo where patients care for animals, and also overcome certain fears by holding and feeding the animals.  

Each patient has a program personally designed for his or her individual needs. The success of the Retorno methodology has been recognized worldwide, and patients come from North America, South America, the United Kingdom, South Africa, and elsewhere to avail themselves of its proven techniques. 

Rabbi Eckstein recently traveled to Argentina, to discuss that community’s addiction problems. The community sent representatives to Israel to receive training at Retorno, in preparation for opening a new branch in Argentina. 

An Investment for the Future 

Victor Mann describes the kehillah as a warm and accepting environment, and says that the beautiful grounds make for a relaxed, comforting atmosphere. Retorno’s rate of success, he says, far exceeds that of other rehabilitation centers.  

As part of Retorno’s outreach and reception staff, Victor speaks with addicts and their families, explaining to them the programs, the treatment methods, the requirements, and the cost. He also serves as the patients’ liaison from the time they walk through the door until their leave. Additionally, Victor works for Retorno’s international awareness campaign, which publishes articles, engages on social media, and connects with other organizations to raise awareness about the dangers of addiction. 

Victor’s message to the community is that the Retorno program is an investment in the patient’s future. Whether the patient wants to stay in Israel or go back home to New York, Retorno offers the best opportunity to get his or her life back in track. The journey to recovery is not always smooth or simple, but patients at Retorno have a supportive hand at every step of the way. 

For more information about Retorno, please contact Victor Mann by email at reception@retorno.org, or by phone/WhatsApp at (011972) 050-239-6065.