Part I: Life Under Restriction in Syria (1948–1992)

Linda Sadacka

This is the first in a three-part series exploring the experiences of Syrian Jews who remained in Syria through the latter half of the 20^th century. It focuses on the decades between the establishment of the State of Israel in 1948 and the early 1990s, when leaving the country was tightly restricted and, for most, not a realistic option.

The Jewish presence in Syria extends back centuries, with established and deeply rooted communities in Damascus and Aleppo, two cities that served not only as geographic centers but as anchors of religious, commercial, and communal life. These were not marginal communities. They were communities of stature, shaped by generations of scholarship, leadership, and rich Jewish life.

Aleppo, known historically as Aram Tzova, was home to one of the most prominent Jewish communities in the region. It was closely associated with the legacy of Rabbeinu Moshe ben Maimon, the Rambam, whose halachic influence shaped Jewish life across the world, and whose teachings were deeply embedded in the traditions followed by the community. The Aleppo Codex – regarded by the Rambam and others as the most authentic written text of the Tanach –  was long preserved there, and stood as a symbol of textual precision and communal responsibility.

Damascus, one of the oldest continuously inhabited cities in the world, was similarly home to a longstanding and respected Jewish presence. Among its most distinguished figures was Rabbi Chaim Vital, the primary disciple of the Arizal, whose teachings in Kabbalah became foundational in the development of Jewish thought. His connection to Damascus reinforced the city’s place not only as a center of daily life, but as a link in the transmission of a deep spiritual tradition.

By the middle of the 20^th century, these communities, though their numbers reduced, remained structured and intact. Families lived in close proximity, traditions were maintained with consistency, and communal institutions continued to function with continuity.

An Atmosphere of Suspicion

The turning point came in 1948.

Following the establishment of the State of Israel, the status of Jews across the Arab world shifted, and Syria was no exception. Restrictions were introduced that affected movement, property, and participation in broader society. Jewish-owned assets were subject to oversight. Travel became limited. Economic opportunities narrowed. These measures were not isolated; they formed part of a broader recalibration of how Jews were positioned within the state.

After the Six Day War in 1967, these conditions intensified. Suspicion toward the Jewish community deepened, and restrictions that had once been administrative evolved into systemic persecution. By the time Hafez al-Assad came to power in 1970, these measures were no longer temporary responses to regional conflict. They had become embedded policy within a centralized and controlled system of governance.

Assad’s Syria functioned through strong state authority and a far-reaching intelligence network. For the Jewish community, this created a reality in which daily life could continue, but always within defined and understood limits. Synagogues remained open, religious observance continued, families maintained tradition and routine – but within a tense atmosphere of suspicion and hostility.

By the 1970s and 1980s, the Jewish population had become increasingly concentrated in Damascus, with a smaller and declining presence in Aleppo. Jewish neighborhoods in Damascus functioned with internal cohesion. Families lived near one another. Stores, schools, and synagogues operated within a relatively contained environment.

In the home, life maintained continuity. Shabbat preparations began well before sunset on Friday afternoon, with the kitchen becoming the center of activity. Kibbeh was shaped carefully by hand, filled and sealed with practiced precision. Lahma b’gine was layered and set to cook slowly. Hamud simmered, its flavor familiar and expected. These were not occasional dishes. They were constants, repeated week after week, unchanged across time.

A child moved through the room, asking a question, receiving an answer. Another set the table. The home moved with quiet coordination, each action part of a sequence that required no instruction.

Life functioned normally – but with palpable tension in the air.

Life Under Surveillance

When the phone rang, there was a pause before it was answered – not out of immediate fear, but out of awareness. Conversations were not assumed to be private. Even routine exchanges could be overheard, repeated, or interpreted beyond their intent.

The Mukhabarat, Syria’s intelligence service, maintained oversight of the Jewish community. Individuals were known. Movement was tracked. Contact with outsiders was monitored. This presence did not need to be visible at all times. It was understood.

So people adjusted accordingly. They did not assume privacy. They operated within an awareness of boundaries.

When someone finally picked up the phone, the voice on the other end remained measured. Responses were controlled and brief. Certain topics were avoided, and certain details were not shared.

Children learned this without being told. They observed tone. They recognized when a sentence ended too early. They understood when a subject shifted without explanation. Eventually, this awareness became instinctive. Surveillance was part of daily life.

Education in Syria was available, though within certain limits. Advancement in certain fields required approvals that were not easily obtained. Professional paths were shaped by what the system allowed.

Economic activity, too, was subjected to a controlled framework. Business decisions required caution. Movement tied to commerce required awareness.

Religious life continued, as well, but with distinction between private and public space. In the synagogue, practice was maintained, and religious identity could be fully expressed inside the home, but outside, discretion was needed. Visible signs of religious identity were not always worn openly. Behavior was adjusted based on surroundings. What was natural within the community was not always expressed beyond it.

This was not framed as a contradiction, or as hypocrisy. It was understood as an unfortunate necessity.

If conflict arose, there was no expectation that it would be resolved through an impartial system. Legal structures did not operate independently of the broader political framework. And so the Jews needed to carefully consider at all times where they went and what they said. People learned these boundaries without formal instruction, through observation – a conversation that ended too soon, a subject that was not continued, a presence that changed after a visit. Sometimes this understanding came through partial accounts of individuals who had been questioned, detained, or prevented from moving forward. The details were not always shared. But the pattern was clear.

There was family. There was routine. There was continuity. But these elements existed within strict boundaries that were consistently enforced and widely understood.

Trapped Inside the Borders

Beyond Syria’s borders lay another reality. To the south was Israel, to the west, Lebanon, and to the north, Turkey. Each border represented proximity without access. For most Syrian Jews, these were not routes – they were inviolable boundaries. The idea of leaving existed in theory, but not in practice. Geography suggested possibility, but policy defined reality. Over time, the awareness of how close those borders were, and how inaccessible they remained, became part of the quiet understanding that shaped daily life.

Movement beyond Syria was the most tightly controlled element of life. Travel required official authorization which was rarely granted. Requests for travel documents went unanswered, applications were submitted and remained pending indefinitely, and meetings with officials resulted in delays without resolution. And when authorization was given, it often came with conditions designed to ensure return, such as a requirement to leave close family members behind. This made departure more than a personal decision – it became a calculation that involved others: parents, siblings, children.

Border crossings were monitored, and all movement near exit points drew attention.

Attempts to leave without permission carried serious consequences. Individuals who attempted to bypass restrictions could be detained. In some cases, the repercussions were more severe. The details of these repercussions were not openly discussed, because they did not need to be. The outcomes were understood.

In April 1992, the policy shifted – the Syrian government announced that Jews would be permitted to travel abroad. Many chose to leave.

In the next installment, this series turns outward – from life within Syria to the paths beyond it, through the account of Mr. Harun Shamosh Imir, whose efforts helped facilitate the departure of more than 3,000 Syrian Jews through Turkey, navigating a system where movement was controlled, borders were closed, and leaving required careful coordination, hard-to-obtain access, and the ability to move through routes that led far off the beaten track.Linda Sadacka is a writer, political strategist, and influential community voice focused on Jewish affairs and public policy.

Pnina Souid

All of the Mitzvah Man volunteers are committed to doing hesed. One volunteer in particular is especially  involved with helping needy families. Often, she will send the Mitzvah Man a text when she thinks he can be of help. Working together, they have helped many needy families.

Sarah’s Laundry Woes

Recently, this volunteer texted about  a needy woman, we’ll call Sarah, in desperate need of a dryer. With three active children at home there was a lot of laundry! Sarah usually walked with all three kids in tow to the laundromat three times a week. This was, of course, both exhausting and time consuming. It became especially difficult in the winter, when the weather was literally  freezing.

Sarah was told that she could get a small dryer for her apartment that the landlord would approve of. However, she could not afford this. She turned her troubles to Hashem, and began to pray that He would help her to get a small dryer. She was told specifically about an appliance called a gas top load dryer. [This is a high-efficiency clothes dryer that uses natural gas or propane to generate heat for drying, typically paired with a top load washer. Together they could fit into her apartment.] Might the Mitzvah Man Organization be able to please provide one for Sarah?

The Mitzvah Man had never heard of such an appliance, and did not know where to find one. He apologized to the volunteer, saying that this was beyond his expertise. Still, his heart went out to Sarah. He did want to help her, but had no idea where to look, and he was busy, as always, with other cases as well..

Twenty-four hours after receiving the text from the volunteer, he received the following email:

To the Rescue!

Hi Michael, I own an appliance store on Coney Island Avenue and am going out of business. There is only one item that I can’t seem to get rid of. It is a gas top load dryer. Do you know anyone who can use it? We will install it for them.

What an amazing example of hashgacha pratit! This man was offering exactly what Sarah needed!  The Mitzvah Man immediately texted the volunteer to tell her about the email and that the gas top load dryer would be delivered and installed free of charge..

Later that evening the Mitzvah Man stopped at a store to buy nuts. While waiting online, he received a text from the volunteer.

Woman already received the gas top load dryer. After it was installed, she dried her first load of laundry and she is crying tears of gratefulness and happiness. She is so thankful for all the help and for Hashem answering her prayers.

The Mitzvah Man felt happy and grateful, too! He felt his heart overflowing with excitement and wanted to share the beautiful story. When he got to the counter, he told the story to the woman who rang up his peanuts, and he showed her the text.

He explained that the organization he runs helped this woman get a top load gas dryer for her small apartment. She is emotional from happiness.

The woman at the counter asked what the name was of the organization.  He told her that she probably had never heard of it. When pressed, he answered that  it is the Mitzvah Man Organization. Her eyes opened wide. She responded, “You made my daughter’s wedding two years ago!”

The Mitzvah Man looked up to the Heavens with a word of thanks. How wonderous it was that Hashem  connected the volunteer with Sarah, connected Sarah with the Mitzvah Man, connected the appliance man with the Mitzvah Man, and then connected him with the woman whose daughter’s wedding the Mitzvah Man Organization helped to make two years ago. The Mitzvah Man thought, “What a beautiful display of Divine Providence!”

Rabbi Yehuda Finchas

Sammy woke up on Shabbat morning, excruciating pain shooting through his jaw. He arrived at my door barely able to speak, his face contorted, clutching his cheek. “Rabbi,” he whispered, “the pain medication isn’t helping. I don’t know what to do – can I have my tooth pulled even though it’s Shabbat?”

Later that week, Dr. Isaac Levi, a Jewish dentist, posed a related question: “If a Jewish patient asks me to extract a tooth on Shabbat, would I be allowed to help?” I can walk to the dental surgery and all my assistants are non-Jewish, but I would still be the one performing the extraction, which will inevitably cause bleeding.”

The Potential Halachic Issues

Extracting a tooth on Shabbat raises several halachic concerns discussed by the poskim:

Chovel (Wounding): Causing bleeding is forbidden on Shabbat. Since tooth extraction almost always causes bleeding, this is a central issue.

Kotzer (Harvesting): Some poskim have compared removing a tooth to uprooting a plant from the ground. However, most authorities reject this comparison, arguing that kotzer applies only to items that grow from the earth – not to teeth.

Gozez (Shearing): Others suggest it may resemble cutting skin tabs, hair or nails (the melacha of gozez), which is also forbidden. Yet, many poskim disagree since gozez applies only to things that grow back, like hair or wool – not teeth.

Refuah: Engaging in medical treatment is rabbinically restricted on Shabbat.

Mesaye’a (Assisting in Prohibited Acts): If the patient opens his mouth, does he transgress Shabbat by assisting the dentist?

Despite these concerns, Maran the Beit Yosef (Orach Chaim 328, citing Orchot Chaim) writes that one who suffers tooth pain may instruct a non-Jew to extract it. This ruling is codified by the Rema (Orach Chaim 328:3). The Magen Avraham classified tooth extraction as a melacha, but the Biur Halacha argues it is only rabbinic, since the bleeding is not desired (psik reisha d’lo nicha lei), and Hacham Ovadia Yosef, zt”l, clarifies in Leviat hen (83) that the act is not considered melachah tzricha legufa and it is therefore derabanan.

Hacham Ovadia’s Analysis

Hacham Ovadia Yosef, in Chazon Ovadia (Shabbat Vol. 3, p. 337), provides a comprehensive halachic analysis that rests on several foundational principles:

Melachah She’eina Tzericha Legufa: The extraction is not done for the bleeding, but rather, to relieve pain. As such, it is not a constructive act in the classic Torah sense, and is classified  a melachah derabbanan (rabbinic prohibition).

Psik Reisha D’lo Nicha Lei: While bleeding is inevitable, it is neither intended nor desired. This further establishes its rabbinic rather than biblical status.

Mesaye’a Ein Bo Mamash: Minimal patient assistance (such as keeping the mouth open or turning the head) is not halachically significant in this situation. The patient is not transgressing Shabbat by cooperating with the dentist.

Conclusion

Tooth extraction on Shabbat is generally classified as a melachah she’eina tzericha legufa, accompanied by psik reisha d’lo nicha lei. It is therefore only a rabbinic prohibition. For someone in serious pain, halacha permits requesting a non-Jewish practitioner to perform the extraction, and the patient’s cooperation is not halachically problematic.

In Sammy’s case, if his pain was severe, halacha would allow him to ask a non-Jewish dentist to perform the extraction on Shabbat. As for Dr. Levi, who is Jewish, performing the extraction in such a case would be prohibited. If, however, there is any risk of infection spreading or other complications that could endanger life, the situation escalates to pikuach nefesh, and full treatment becomes not only permitted but is obligatory – even to be performed by a Jewish dentist, overriding biblical prohibitions if necessary.Rabbi Yehuda Finchas is a worldwide expert, lecturer, and author on Medical Halacha. He heads the Torat Habayit Medical Halacha Institute. He is the author of “Brain Death in Halacha and the Tower of Babel Syndrome” and “Nutrition and Hydration in Halacha.” To contact Rabbi Finchas, email rabbi@torathabayit.com.

Sam Sutton

Established in 2008, M&S Softball has never just been a league. It’s been a proving ground, a stage, and for many, a second home. Now entering its 18th season, the league finds itself at a defining moment – not by chance, but by design.

The truth is, leagues like this don’t survive by standing still. They evolve. They adapt. They find ways to honor what was while building what’s next. And right now, what’s next has arrived.

Over the past few seasons, the league began quietly shifting. As some of the longtime veterans started to wind down – careers entering their later innings or coming to a close – the opportunity was clear. This wasn’t about replacing them. It was about reinforcing the future. Slowly, intentionally, a new wave of players began to enter the league. Now, that wave has become a movement.

Leadership That Still Sets the Standard

For all the excitement around the new wave, the foundation of this league remains firmly in place. The captains are the cornerstone of the M&S Softball League. This isn’t a group learning on the fly. This is a room filled with experience, championships, and years of understanding what it takes to win in M&S (see sidebar). Together, this group doesn’t just run teams. They set the tone.

Best Is Yet to Come

This season’s player pool is filled – loaded, really – with young talent. Not just bodies to fill rosters, but real players. Pitchers who can command the zone. Infielders with range and instincts. Outfielders who cover ground and change games defensively. The level of athleticism, energy, and upside across the board is as strong as it’s ever been.

But what makes this moment even more unique isn’t just the youth – it’s where they come from. Many of these new players aren’t strangers to M&S. They grew up around it. They watched it. They heard the stories. And now, they’re stepping onto the same field. Sons of former players. Brothers of current stars. Names that already carry meaning within the league. M&S isn’t just continuing – it’s circling back.

A Full Generation Later

We’re now seeing the children of the very players who built this league step into the spotlight. And with that comes something you can’t teach – pride, pressure, and a deep understanding of what it means to be here.

One of the more intriguing storylines comes from a familiar name. A league veteran and Hall of Famer now has his son entering the mix. Momo steps into the league this year, carrying both the name and the expectations that come with it.

The same can be said for Elliott Dweck, son of league legend Isaac Norwood-Dweck. Known already for a slick glove, Elliott enters with a defensive reputation and a last name that holds serious weight.

Then there’s the next chapter of the Chehebar name. Solly Chehebar – better known as Big Solly – was part of this league from the very beginning. Now, his son steps in, with big shoes to fill and a legacy to live up to.

And in a move that speaks volumes about where the league is headed, reigning MVP Mo Shama has stepped aside, choosing to watch from the outside as the youth movement takes over. In his place, his nephew Abo Shama enters the league – a highly regarded defensive player from the local circuit, ready for his shot.

Up and Coming Stars

But it’s not just about legacy. There’s another group coming in – players with no ties to the past, no names to carry – just game. And in many ways, they may be the most dangerous.

Irving Setton enters as a 20-year-old infielder with pop, already turning heads after making noise in the BKS over the past few years. He’s also the brother of Leo Setton – an impact player from day one in this league – so the expectations are already there. Now, Irving gets his opportunity to make his own mark.

Joseph Abady carries a name that already echoes in M&S postseason history. His brother, Victor “Cream” Abady, built his reputation on big moments when it mattered most. Now Joseph steps in, with that same last name – and all that comes with it.

David Hakim brings a calm, composed presence – but his game tells a different story. Alongside his brother Noah, he adds another layer to this growing youth core.

Danny Levy, just 18, now joins the league alongside his brother Momo Levy, who has already made his mark in the outfield. The bloodline is there – but now it’s Danny’s turn.

And then there’s Joseph “J Money” Dweck, a slick-fielding third baseman who brings confidence and flair to the hot corner. Smooth with the glove and steady under pressure, he’s the type of player who can lock down the left side and make the tough play look routine.

The outfield continues to get stronger with Josh Abisror, a physical presence with real upside. And he won’t be alone – his uncle, Tovi Abisror, a former league champion, returns to the field. One looking to rise, the other already knowing what it takes.

Victor Hoffman makes his long-awaited debut. A colorful personality with real talent, the infielder brings both energy and edge to the dirt.

Bruce Novick arrives as one of the top prospects out of the Yeshiva league circuits. A true center fielder with instincts, range, and feel – he’s the real deal.

Three’s a Charm

And then there’s what might be the biggest storyline of them all – the arrival of a trio of rookie starting pitchers.

Zack Kairy leads the way, an award-winning young ace known for his ability to pound the zone and throw strikes consistently. Now, he takes the mound in a league where every inning matters.

Marc Sayegh, the flamethrower out of Brooklyn, brings both velocity and roots that run deeper than most. Having pitched in the first-ever M&S Kids League, he now returns fully developed and ready to make his mark.

And MD Applegrad, one of the most highly regarded arms from the LBA, comes in with experience, confidence, and something to prove. A champion elsewhere – but now chasing to be one here.

Three different styles. Three different paths. One shared goal – to make their mark on M&S.
And as if that wasn’t enough, another wave arrives with proven credentials.

Mo Dowek, Chatz Katz, and Shloimy Zlotnick – established LBA stars – make their M&S debuts, bringing with them a level of play that demands attention.

Right behind them is another group already opening eyes – Marvin Azrak, Adam Azar, and Yaakov Goodman – players who may be new to M&S, but are quickly making it clear they belong.

The Foundation Remains

And through it all, the foundation remains. The veterans are still here. They’re not being replaced. They’re passing something down.

And the league itself hasn’t changed. The standard is still the standard. Every game is still played with purpose. Every matchup still matters. With full live broadcasts, consistent media coverage, and a growing audience, the spotlight has never been brighter.

For the new players, this isn’t just another league. This is M&S. There’s history here. There’s expectation. There’s pressure. And now, there’s a new generation ready to take it on. The next chapter isn’t coming. It’s already here. Play ball!

THE CAPTIANS

At the forefront is Uri Adler, the reigning champion, who returns looking to defend his title and prove last season was no fluke.

Edmund Beyda, a champion in his own right, is back as well. A proven leader who knows how to build and manage a roster, Beyda brings intensity, structure, and a steady presence every time he takes the field.

Michael “Sabon” Salomon is one of the most accomplished players in league history and an active Hall of Famer.

Michael “Melech” Solomon continues to be one of the league’s true staples. A former champion and respected presence behind the plate, his leadership and consistency have made him a cornerstone of M&S for years.

Maurice Haber is woven into the fabric of this league. A champion, a competitor, and someone who has been here since the early days.

Hank Dweck returns to the captain’s chair with something still missing from his resume – a championship in M&S. Despite success in other leagues and a long list of accolades, that one title has remained just out of reach. The question now is simple: has he lost a step, or is this the year he finally gets it done?

Isaac Cohen isthe lone rookie captain. While new to the role, he’s far from unfamiliar with the league. A student of the game who’s been tapped into the softball world for years, Cohen now gets his opportunity to lead – bringing a fresh perspective into a room full of experience.

DAVE GORDON

Sirens, school cancellations, and crowded bomb shelters have become the “new norm” of life in Israel. Yet, Israelis have responded with resilience, strength, and communal bonding.

Community Magazine interviewed a cross‑section of Israelis about their lives and their resilience during this period. Israelis are all navigating the backdrop of alerts of possible sirens, often followed by actual sirens, indicating a missile has been fired towards their area. Their reflections exhibit what has changed since Iran and its proxies attacked: the way communities unite to support each other, the sense of purpose, and pride. Yes, families need to stay close to shelters. Certainly, everyone lives with a level of tension and uncertainty. There has been a financial toll on individuals and families. And in this small country everyone feels the losses.

How are Israelis coping, supporting one another, making sense of their fears, and still accessing faith when the future has rarely felt more uncertain?  Let’s hear from them.

Journalist Shanna Fuld, of Tel Aviv, originally from Queens, NY,  whose apartment was destroyed last June by an Iranian missile

How has your daily routine changed since the war?

In Israel, time is measured between sirens and alerts. When I am going to do anything, I think about what would need to be done before the siren happens. I have evacuated my apartment in the evening for about a month, so that I could sleep in an apartment that has a mamad (reinforced safe room).

You only have so much energy because you’re not sleeping great, and you might be subconsciously worried about being killed in a missile attack. With work, a couple of my gigs are canceled so I’m not getting paid, because I can’t fly and I can’t go to stuff.

What do people outside of Israel not understand?

People don’t understand enough of the frustration of how this disrupts people’s lives… what it takes to rebuild after your apartment has been hit. I was so blessed that my friend posted my situation in a WhatsApp group, and a bunch of women from Tel Aviv, whom I did not know, pulled together bags of their clothing for me and brought it to me at my hotel [where evacuees were resettled].

One person put together a makeup bag, basic cosmetics, including a toothbrush, toothpaste, and face moisturizer. That was the best thing anybody gave me. Community plays an aspect.

I didn’t ask for it, but people from my synagogue sent me donations. And you know what? It was so needed because my compensation package from the government came to me more than three months after the attack, and I couldn’t work for a couple of months because I was spending my days in government offices.

I needed a security deposit for a new apartment, new furniture, and food.

Everybody’s very acutely aware that you probably won’t die from a Hamas missile. You can shelter in the stairwell. But you can’t shelter in the stairwell for an Iran missile, because those are more powerful.

Asif Izak, native Israeli, -is chairman of Or Ofir Foundation, which fosters leadership, strengthens community ties, and builds bridges between Israel and the Jewish world, he is also Head of the Hof Carmel Regional Council

What have these past few months been like for your family?

Two of my children enlisted in the IDF over the past year, and we also have a younger daughter at home. The concern is constant, but alongside it there is also a great deal of strength that comes from family and community. We live in Kibbutz Hahotrim, within a community that demonstrates every day that mutual responsibility is not a slogan – it is a lived reality. This is true within our home, and it is equally true across Hof HaCarmel and throughout Israel.

Have there been evacuations in your area?

In Hof HaCarmel, we were not required to evacuate, but very quickly we found ourselves absorbing around 3,000 evacuees – from both the North and the Gaza border region. This represented about a 10 percent increase in our population in a very short time. We opened our communities, established two new schools for them, and supported them over many months. This was a very tangible expression of mutual responsibility – not just as an idea, but in daily action.

What gives you hope?

I have seen, firsthand, a powerful resurgence of solidarity and mutual responsibility across the country. Out of hardship, people are coming closer together, supporting one another, and strengthening their sense of belonging. These events also remind us how essential the State of Israel is – a place where the Jewish people can live in security, and take responsibility for their own future.

Award-winning Israeli journalist Aviva Engel, originally from Montreal

How has your daily routine changed since the war began?

I live about 30 minutes from Haifa, in Zichron Yaakov – in northern Israel, though fortunately not far enough north to be directly affected by the unrelenting rocket fire from Lebanon. While Purim was marked in a subdued, almost Covid-like way due to restrictions on large gatherings, Passover was remarkably quiet, thanks to the ceasefire.

The beginning of the war was particularly trying, with frequent sirens that required us to stay close to shelters at all times. Simple activities, like long walks, hiking, going to the beach, or even playing outdoor sports, were no longer possible. Thankfully, I work from home and have access to a shelter.

As for daily life, malls, grocery stores, and restaurants equipped with shelters have remained open.

Have you or people close to you suffered personal losses?

Since October 7, a relative’s partner was killed while serving in the IDF, and a friend’s child lost both legs on an IDF mission. We are continually inspired by their courage and heroism, and carry their sacrifices with us in our daily lives.

What does “normal life” mean?

There is an expression in Hebrew, lizrom – to go with the flow. Life right now is anything but normal, and I try to embrace that mindset as much as possible, recognizing how quickly circumstances can change.

Every quiet moment with loved ones feels like a gift, as do the children playing in the nearby schoolyard.

Rabbi Raphael Shore, originally from Canada, author and executive chairman of OpenDor Media

How has this war affected your family?

Being at home more has created a kind of closeness that daily life doesn’t always allow. At the same time, something unexpected has happened in the neighborhoods. People are meeting each other in bomb shelters, sometimes neighbors they barely knew before, and those moments, ironically, have created real connection.

None of this takes away from the stress. People are tired. Sleep is disrupted. But alongside that, there is something strengthening that’s happening, both within families and across communities.

How has this affected your children?

I see it most clearly through my daughter and her family. They have five kids under the age of thirteen.

The kids have been out of school for about a month, and suddenly the full responsibility shifts to the parents. It’s like running a full-time camp. You have to constantly create activities, keep the kids engaged, and make sure they’re not sitting around getting anxious. Sometimes they come over to our house and we do arts and crafts, to give everyone a bit of relief.

It takes a lot of creativity and a lot of extra energy. But what stands out is that families are really stepping up. There’s a strong effort to keep things as normal and as positive as possible for the kids.

Have you or your family experienced any personal loss?

I have a nephew who spent much of the past two years in Gaza. He lost more than twenty soldiers under his command. These are not distant events. They are deeply personal, and very hard.

What helps people keep going is a strong sense of purpose, and the feeling that we are not alone in this. There is a deep sense of family, not just within our own homes, but across the country.

It doesn’t take away the pain, nothing does. But it does help people carry it.

Our son is just finishing his army service this summer, but he’s been in a state of war from the very beginning. Even now, when he’s on base near Tel Aviv, they’re hearing explosions overhead regularly. It’s a constant reminder of what’s going on, and it’s not easy.

How has this affected your faith and hope?

Faith here is very strong, even if it doesn’t always look the way people expect.

There’s a perception outside of Israel that it’s a largely secular society, and in terms of formal religious practice that may be true for many. But the level of emunah, of belief and deeper awareness, is much more widespread than people realize.

In a time like this, that becomes very visible. People feel that we are living through something beyond the ordinary. You see it in the stories that come up almost daily, situations that could have ended in far greater tragedy and didn’t. Just yesterday, for example, a missile struck a building with a massive explosive that, had it detonated fully, could have leveled an entire block. It didn’t. Moments like that leave a strong impression.

Entrepreneur and author of Hinenu (Here We Are), David Shlachter, made aliya from California and resides in Tel Aviv

What has life been like for you and family?

Before the war, our daily life in Tel Aviv felt almost unusually smooth. Our kids’ school is two blocks away. We don’t have a car, and they bike everywhere. When the war started, that disappeared immediately. School shut down, work essentially stopped, and movement shrank to a very small radius around our building. Even something simple like going for a run or out to eat comes with the expectation that you may need to drop everything and get to a bomb shelter within minutes.

What has it been like in the shelters?

Two other families moved into our apartment because they didn’t have adequate bomb shelters, so at times we’ve had 15 to 18 people living together, including nine kids. There’s very little privacy, and no real separation between day and night, work and rest. That creates friction, but it also creates a kind of shared resilience. Practically, we’ve had to be flexible – sharing space, coordinating meals, helping with each other’s kids. Emotionally, it’s about staying steady for the children and for each other. There’s something stabilizing about not going through it alone.

How has this affected the kids?

The kids feel the disruption immediately. It’s obvious that they should be in school, that they need structure and normal interaction, and that absence is hard to replace. At the same time, they adapt in ways that are surprising. They’ve created their own routines – games, activities, and ways of passing time. Even the bomb shelter sometimes becomes a place where they play. What stands out is how quickly they normalize the situation.

Our nanny was called up to reserve duty in a search-and-rescue unit, and that shift was immediate. She went from being part of our daily life to being on the front lines responding to missile strikes. The emotional experience is a mix of concern and gratitude – knowing people close to you are in harm’s way, but recognizing that they’re the reason the rest of us have some degree of safety.

David Lange, originally from Australia, editor of news site IsraellyCool, whose stepson fell in battle in Lebanon

Since the Iran war began, how has your daily routine changed?

There was no change to my work routine, because I work from home.

But there were definitely changes to my travel routines. When we get a missile alert, we have one and a half minutes from siren to shelter. You don’t want to be caught in the middle of driving somewhere, because you might end up on the side of the road just ducking down.

Once I got stuck outside, I was near a shopping center so I pulled into the car park, ran out, and went into their shelter.

These days I don’t go for long shopping trips, because, obviously, I didn’t want to be stuck.

What kind of community support did you receive after your stepson was killed?

That’s one of the shining lights. When people found out, there were multiple communities in our city that were ready to do everything we needed. People provided meals and cleaned the house. Right before Pesach, there was no official shiva. But my wife and her ex-husband had an open house, similar to shiva where people come and pay their respects and talk, which I think is a very cathartic experience.

Hundreds of people came, including Israeli President Isaac Herzog, and a sheikh from a Druze village.  It really showed the unity of Israeli society. And it was just so comforting.

Has this affected your faith or hope? It doesn’t make us lose hope or faith. In fact, having the hope and faith helps us cope with the conflict, and anti-Semitism, which we’re seeing around the world.

Resilience in Israel is not a slogan or a moment of triumph – it is a daily practice, quiet and cumulative. It lives in the split-second decisions made between sirens, in the crowded shelters where strangers become neighbors, in the parents who steady their voices for their children, and in the communities that refuse to let anyone face loss alone. Resilience does not erase fear or grief. It strengthens people. In a country where uncertainty hums beneath the surface of ordinary life, resilience is found not in the absence of danger, but in the insistence on living fully despite it – holding fast to one another, to purpose, and to a deeper faith that even in the darkest moments, they are not alone, and that something larger is carrying them forward.

ELLEN GELLER KAMARAS

Are you familiar with the phrase, “Are you ready to flip the script?” Flipping the script can mean many things: rewriting your personal narrative, shifting your mindset to challenge the status quo, or making a bold, transformative change that turns everything around.

The phrase is often used when someone has been wronged and acts to change the power dynamic or uses an unexpected approach that results in a positive outcome.  More recently, it’s become popular with respect to personal and professional relationships.  In personal relationships, an example can be as simple as deciding where to go on a date.

The term flipping the script continues to inspire individuals to take back control by changing one’s perspective and create positive changes in their lives and communities.

Flipping the script encompasses the reversal of negative thoughts and situations into positive thoughts and opportunities.

Last month, I wrote about aging and older individuals feeling invisible.  Some strategies to “flip the script” when one feels invisible included: age out loud and share your wisdom, seek out community, and engage in intergenerational relationships. Please considerthe following strategies to flip the script in your personal life and in your career.

Shift Your Mindset

We often read about altering our lens to uncover new possibilities and to reframe negative thoughts into positive ones. 

A prime example of flipping the script is to change your perspective on setbacks or challenges.  Can you view them as learning opportunities or new chances for growth?   Know that adversity can breed strength. 

A first step in flipping the script is to reframe negative thoughts into positive thoughts or affirmations.  How often do negative thoughts pop into your head?  Research shows that unless we are occupied with positive thoughts, worrying is the brain’s default position. Your brain is a muscle that runs on autopilot.  We can learn how to keep negative thoughts and emotions in check by amplifying positive emotions.  Great leaders know that a positive attitude can be contagious.

Of course, we need time to process a negative event before we try to flip the script. An intelligent person pays attention to his or her mental health, not only physical health.  Know your triggers and your unhealthy thought patterns. Catch the early warning signs. 

Default Patterns

Are your default patterns regarding conflict or stress making you sick?

Try this challenge: when a negative thought enters your mind, think three positive thoughts, thereby training yourself to flip the script. Use the Three Cs of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy – CBT.

One of CBT’s core principles is that psychological problems are based partially on unhealthy ways of thinking. CBT identifies and challenges automatic thought patterns or “cognitive distortions” that contribute to anxiety, depression, and stress.

Catch the thought.  Check it for Reality.  Change it to a thought that is more positive or realistic.

Embrace a Growth Mindset

Dr. Carol S. Dweck, a psychology professor at Stanford University, created the concept of a “growth mindset.”   In her book, Mindset, she argues that the way you think influences the course of your life, starting as early as your preschool years. According to Dweck, we learn one of two mindsets from our parents, our teachers and our environment, a fixed or a growth mindset.  A fixed mindset provides that personal qualities such as intelligence and personality are innate and unchangeable.  For example, many of us were trained in this mindset, “It’s okay, I was never good at math. She’s naturally athletic, I can’t compete with her.”  Having a fixed mindset means feeling like you must constantly prove yourself that you have more ability than you were born with.

If you have a growth mindset, you believe you can change and improve. The abilities you are born with are only a starting point.  This means that with hard work, perseverance, and the right learning approaches, you can advance and get smarter.  People with a growth mindset view mistakes as opportunities to learn, are passionate about learning, and seek challenges to push themselves and to grow.

Find the Silver Lining

This coping strategy is one I learned from my mother, a”h.  It’s a simple yet powerful tool to reduce the results of hardships and enhance resilience by finding silver linings within difficult and painful circumstances.  When we seek a silver lining, we turn problems or stumbling blocks into opportunities.

Silver linings are simply the good aspects of challenging or painful situations. The ability to perceive silver linings comes with an optimistic mindset that promotes emotional resilience and the ability to adapt to future challenges.

Many of us discovered silver linings during the pandemic, such as pivoting to find a new career opportunity after losing a job.  Other examples include your flight getting cancelled but getting a refund and finding a great local staycation spot. Or your car breaking down, which caused you to  become more fit while biking to work.

Transform Setbacks into Steppingstones

Flip the script by using setbacks to propel yourself forward instead of letting them derail you. Embrace failure as a steppingstone to success rather than a defeat.  To achieve this, be open to growing, try new methods and attitudes, be creative, and analyze what went wrong.  And don’t forget to ask for feedback and to persevere.  This strategy is especially relevant to professional relationships.

Other successful methods in the workplace are recommending solutions instead of just highlighting problems during a meeting, stretching yourself to accept a project that is out of your comfort zone, being understanding rather than defensive, and showing gratitude to the rest of your team. 

Acts of Kindness

Let’s conclude with one of our best tools, acts of kindness.  Flip the script by exercising your hesed muscle. Research shows that being nice, kind, and empathetic to others can help you reduce stress AND improve your mood.  Acts of kindness release the feel-good chemical, oxytocin, in the brain.  Remember to set boundaries to protect your mental and emotional health.

Please share your feedback with me at ellen.kamaras@gmail.com.

The recent effort to stop the proposed casino in Brooklyn stands as a powerful example of what can be achieved when a community unites around shared values and concerns. A casino in Coney Island, the backyard of our community, would have posed a serious threat to the safety of our children and also to the cleanliness and quality life of our neighborhood.

Casinos bring increased exposure to gambling, addiction, and associated social harms. For a community that prioritizes education, family life, and moral responsibility, introducing such an environment nearby would have been dangerous for young people, normalizing behavior that can lead to financial distress and personal hardship.

Parents, rabbis, and lay leaders spoke out clearly: the negatives far outweigh the positives.

Under the leadership and coordination of the Sephardic Community Federation, the proposal was ultimately blocked due to immense and sustained pressure placed on those involved. As a result of an intense marketing and awareness campaign including a petition of 8,000 concerned community members, the local elected officials heard our concerns and stopped the project from moving forward. This outcome reflects not politics as usual, but the strength of collective civic action.

The decision to block the casino was not about resisting progress; it was about protecting the future – safeguarding youth, preserving neighborhood integrity, and affirming that development must align with community values. This effort demonstrated that when residents speak with one voice, they can shape outcomes and defend what matters most.

SCF ANNOUNCES MAJOR IMPROVEMENTS FOR ZONING REGULATIONS IN BROOKLYN

The SCF is happy to report that after an almost nine-year lobbying campaign, meaningful sections of the recently enacted City of Yes rezoning program included many special considerations for new and remodeled houses in our neighborhoods.

As a longtime member of the Flatbush Neighborhood Improvement Coalition (FNIC), the SCF worked together with the FNIC and others to bring this major accomplishment to fruition.

The new regulations provide (among others):

• In our neighborhoods only – Southern Brooklyn (not City-wide)

• Enhanced Floor Area Ratio (FAR) of 1.0

• Rear yard depths reduced from 30 feet to 20 feet

• Increase in lot coverage

• Reduction of certain side yard requirements

• Increase in the perimeter side wall height that allows for a 3–4 step-up front porch/entry level vs. the previous 1–2 step-up front porch/entry level.

These enhancements were designed to eliminate the long paperwork delays of a year or more and expenditures of up to $100,000 for legal and filing fees for Special Permits and Variances.

The SCF wishes to extend its deep gratitude to Mayor Eric Adams, his administration, and the Dept. of City Planning Commissioner, Dan Garodnik.

Their combined efforts via more than a dozen meetings, whether they were at City Hall, at the Dept. of City Planning, or on Zoom or by phone, went way above and beyond our expectations.

We are also grateful to Joey Shamie for his untiring efforts re: this initiative and for his involvement in so many other community-wide initiatives.

This historic accomplishment is but one of many successes that the SCF has achieved in its 15-plus years of advocating for the needs of our community.

A Historic Moment for Our Community:‌ Sam Sutton Elected to the New York State Senate

The election of Sam Sutton to the New York State Senate marks a historic and meaningful moment and turning point for our community. A lifelong community member and dedicated activist, Sam’s victory represents the first time one of our own is holding public office, giving our community a direct voice in state government affairs.

For decades, Sam Sutton has been deeply involved in strengthening and uplifting the community. He has served on numerous boards including Sephardic Bikur Holim (as president), NY Cancer Center (as founder), as well as many other projects and initiatives.

Most notably, Sam, along with Ronnie Tawil, is a founder of the Sephardic Community Federation, the advocacy arm of our community, created to ensure that our collective concerns are heard and addressed at every level of government. For over 20 years the SCF has lobbied for our community on important issues while securing tens of millions of dollars for our institutions.

Sam’s election ensures that our community now has a seat at the table on the issues that matter most. With his understanding of our values and needs, we are confident that he will be a strong advocate for:

• Securing funding for our schools, synagogues, and other community organizations
• Fighting anti-Semitism and protecting religious freedoms
• Maintaining clean, safe, and vibrant neighborhoods
• Advancing policies that support families, education, and community institutions

Beyond policy, Sam’s presence in office sends a powerful message: that civic engagement, grassroots advocacy, and long-term commitment to one’s community can lead to a meaningful representation and change.

As Sam Sutton continues his service in the New York State Senate, we look forward with optimism and pride. His leadership promises not only representation, but partnership – a voice that understands where we come from and where we hope to go. We are confident that he will serve with integrity and dedication, and we look forward to having him in office for many years to come.

Our Voice, Our Vote: How SCF United the Community to Register to Vote‌

The Sephardic Community Federation (SCF) has once again demonstrated the power of organized, grassroots advocacy through a historic and highly successful voter registration initiative. What began as a focused community effort grew into a broad, coordinated campaign that mobilized thousands and reshaped civic participation within our community.

Recognizing the importance of civic engagement, the SCF, with the help of community leaders Haim Dabah and Marshall Aronow, launched a multi-faceted voter registration push designed to reach community members wherever they were. Volunteers and leaders spoke directly in schools and synagogues, emphasizing the responsibility and impact of registering to vote. Informational tables were set up outside popular community hotspots and along neighborhood streets, making registration accessible and visible, with dedicated volunteers managing each table.

In addition, SCF implemented a targeted text-message campaign, reaching individuals directly with reminders and guidance on how to register. Volunteers also went door to door, ensuring that no one was overlooked and that every eligible voice had the opportunity to be heard.

The results were extraordinary. As a direct outcome of this collective effort, an estimated number of 15,000 or more new voters were registered, and they turned out to vote in November –  marking the highest voter participation our community has ever seen. This milestone reflects not only numbers, but unity, commitment, and shared purpose.

This achievement proves what is possible when we work together. Civic strength is built through participation, and participation leads to representation. Together, our voice is our vote, and through that vote, we ensure that our community has a seat at the table on all important matters that affect our families, schools, synagogues, safety, and future.

The success of this initiative is a reminder that when we act as one, we are heard. The Sephardic Community Federation’s voter registration drive was not just a campaign – it was a statement: our community is engaged, organized, and ready to shape its own future.

From Hate to Action: Standing United Against Anti-Semitism 

The day after the mayoral election, our community was shaken by a disturbing act of hate: a swastika was discovered painted on a gate outside Magen David Yeshivah in the heart of our community. This act of anti-Semitism was not only an attack on a single institution, but was an attack on our entire community and the values we stand for.

What followed, however, was a powerful demonstration of leadership and resolve.

Newly-elected Senator Sam Sutton along with District Leader Joey Saban acted immediately. Without hesitation, they sprang into action to ensure that this incident would not be ignored or minimized.

Within a short time, a press conference was convened in which NY State Governor Kathy Hochul decided to attend, sending a clear and public message that anti-Semitism has no place in our city or state.

As a direct result of this swift response, additional security funding was granted to our community as well as throughout NY State, strengthening protections for our schools, synagogues, and institutions.

This decisive action reassured families, educators, and community members that their safety is a priority – and that when hate surfaces, it will be met with firm and immediate consequences.

This moment underscored an essential truth: power comes from action. When we do not sit back, when we organize, speak up, and demand accountability, real results follow. Representation matters, and having leaders who understand our community and are willing to fight for it makes a tangible difference.

We are hopeful and confident that Senator Sam Sutton, in collaboration with the Sephardic Community Federation (SCF), will continue to work closely with additional elected official and remain a strong advocate for our community. His response during this critical moment reflects the kind of leadership we need – proactive, visible, and unafraid to confront anti-Semitism head on. 

Frieda Schweky

Spring has sprung and I have a pep in my step. Do I credit that to the sun finally shining, or my ability to leave the house without a ski mask? Possibly. But honestly, I think the real reason is that I spent all winter going to the gym two to four times a week and lifting heavy weights – and it shows. Not just physically, but mentally, too. For the first time since I was a child, I don’t feel the need to take stimulants to manage my ADHD, and I really think I have working out to thank for that.

Here’s the thing about exercise that doesn’t get talked about enough: it’s not just about how you look. Consistently moving your body has real, measurable benefits that kick in almost immediately. In the short term, even a single workout can boost your mood, sharpen your focus, and reduce stress thanks to a flood of endorphins. Long term, regular physical activity lowers your risk of heart disease, type 2 diabetes, and certain cancers, strengthens your bones and joints, improves sleep quality, and has been shown to significantly reduce anxiety and depression.

When I’m on my game, I find it hard to imagine people who think physical exertion just isn’t for them. And I get it, I really do, because I used to be one of those people.

I was a full-on couch potato when I was younger. Then, one day my friend Jeanette invited me to a kickboxing class. Thinking nothing of it, I tagged along.  And I was shocked to discover it was actually fun. I signed up for a membership and started working out for the first time in my life. Am I still into kickboxing? No. But that class lit a bulb in my head that’s never gone out. Working out can be enjoyable if you just find what’s right for you.

Over the years I went through plenty of phases – yoga, Orangetheory [a fitness program that combines full-body strength training with heart-pumping cardio], I even tried spin because my dad has been obsessed with spinning my whole life and still is (it was not for me, sorry Dad). These days my thing is CrossFit. I love lifting heavy weights. It’s satisfying in a way that’s hard to explain, and it’s pretty cool that I’m essentially learning an Olympic sport in the process. Plus, I can carry all my groceries in one trip, which might be the greatest practical benefit of all.

Through all those phases I figured out two things. One: you have to love what you do, or you will quit. Two: you need to give something at least a month of consistent effort before you decide whether it’s for you. Your body needs time to adjust. Once the initial soreness fades and you stop dreading it, that’s when you can actually tell if something clicks for you.

I wanted to inspire other members of our community to get moving, so I asked my Instagram followers what they enjoy doing for exercise. Here’s what they had to say.

Natalie Habaz

Natalie has always been active, but her relationship with movement has evolved beautifully over the decades. She started dance training at 16, doing intensives at Broadway Dance Center through her twenties, then shifted to cardio and light weights, then yoga and weights as she got older. Today she teaches dance, choreography, and restorative somatic work, focused on nervous system regulation. And she still takes choreography classes herself.

“The benefits I focus on are more mental than physical – pushing through limits, resilience techniques and regulation. I think the way to look at consistency is: baby steps into often steps into consistency, which then just becomes routine. Also, work out for the feeling it gives you – empowerment, not looks.”

Violet Bernknopf

Violet found her groove with reformer Pilates – five days a week for the past few years, at 5:30am.

“I sneak out and I’m back before my kids even miss me! It keeps me sane. It’s my version of self-care.”

Violet has a bad back with herniated discs, so the low-impact nature of Pilates was a major draw, but the results have been anything but low-impact: toning, strength, and flexibility all over. Her tip? Go early. First she tried nights, but between the kids and general exhaustion, it wasn’t sticking. Now it’s just her routine – and she genuinely misses it when she can’t go.

Melissa Mora

Melissa loves yoga, and she’s the first to admit she came into it as a skeptic.

“In the beginning I kind of mocked it and didn’t think it would help me or even be considered exercise. And then I saw it transform my life.”

Melissa says yoga tones her more than free weights ever did, while simultaneously de-stressing and energizing her.

“It [yoga] forces optimal breathing, resilience, flexibility, and positivity. But most importantly it fosters grace within yourself. I can’t think of any other exercise, activity, or sport that does ALL of that.”

Jacklyn Gabbay

Jacklyn doesn’t follow a set routine – she follows her gut.

“I go based off my mood,” she says. When she wants something grounding and a little challenging, she goes for a hike, which is good for her mind, body, and soul. And it gives her some time to talk to Hashem. When she wants high energy, she does dance cardio. When she wants to slow down and get out of her head, she turns to yoga. And sometimes, like during the two week Pesach break, she mixes it up entirely – dance one day, aerial yoga the next (yes, aerial yoga, where you can do flips in the air, which sounds like an absolute blast).

But Jacklyn’s fitness journey didn’t start from a place of fun. It started from a place of pain. Around 2020, her close friend was diagnosed with cancer, and Jacklyn was devastated. She was so distraught she couldn’t even eat. She needed somewhere to put all of that emotion, so she threw herself into physical activity, starting with weight training.

“Instead of being depressed on the couch, I found this beneficial outlet. I felt more connected to my body.” Jacklyn began losing weight without even realizing it, because she wasn’t focused on her appearance, she was focused on taking charge of her life. And that shift turned out to be more important than she knew, because it was around this time that she discovered she was dealing with a health issue herself.

So, what’s the takeaway?

Movement looks different for everyone. It can be hikes and heavy lifts, reformer Pilates early in the morning, or aerial yoga on a whim. It’s kickboxing classes you stumble into and yoga practices you initially roll your eyes at. It’s dancing since you were two years old and weight training through one of the hardest seasons of your life. There is no single right answer – just the one that works for you.

What all of these women have in common isn’t a specific workout or a perfect schedule. It’s that they found something that made them feel good, and they kept showing up. Some days that means discipline, and some days that’s just listening to your body and doing what it needs. Both are valid.

If you’ve been on the fence about getting moving, let this be your nudge. You don’t have to love it on day one. Give it a month. Try the weird class your friend invites you to. Go for the hike. Sign up for the thing that intimidates you a little. The shift for your mind, your body, and your whole life might surprise you.

And if all else fails – at the very least, you’ll be able to carry all your groceries in one trip. Trust me, it’s worth it!

Signing off until next time,

Frieda Schweky!

Frieda is an event and portrait photographer. Check Frieda out on Instagram @friedaschwekyphoto. For photography inquiries or article topic suggestions email her at friedaschweky@gmail.com.

 Jack Gindi

Many of us think appreciation is something we give because someone did something for us. They helped. They supported. They solved a problem.

So we say thank you.

But over time, I’ve learned that real appreciation is not about what someone does. It’s about who they are. It’s about recognizing the quiet, consistent presence of someone who showed up – especially when it mattered most.

Fifty Years of Presence

I met my wife, Meredith, when I was a teenager, and we got married young. She has been by my side for over 50 years. When I think about appreciation, I don’t think about a list of things she’s done. I think about something much simpler.

She stayed.

Through the highs and the lows… through seasons of growth and seasons of challenge… she stood beside me. The truth is, we don’t always stop to acknowledge that kind of presence. We get used to it. We assume it. We move past it.

But presence is not a small thing. It may be the greatest gift a person can give.

The People Who See Us

I’ve experienced this in other relationships as well. My oldest brother has been one of those people in my life. Not because of one big moment, but because of how he consistently showed up.

When I struggled, he stepped in. When I needed direction, he guided me. When I doubted myself, he believed in me.

Looking back, what I appreciate most isn’t what he did. It’s that he saw me. He stood beside me.
He was there. And that kind of presence shapes a life.

The Moments That Stay

A friend shared a story with me that sits with me today.

When she was in third grade, she struggled in class while the other children seemed to understand everything easily. One day, a little girl leaned over and quietly helped her.

She was not looking for anything in return – not attention, tot a reward, with no expectation. She  just performed a simple act of kindness.

Years later, they crossed paths again. My friend stopped her and said, “I want you to know, I’ve never forgotten that moment. You saw me when I needed it most.”

One small moment. One person taking the time to see another. And it stayed with her for a lifetime.

What We Often Miss

That’s the part we overlook. We think appreciation has to be tied to something big or measurable. But often, it’s the smallest things that matter most.

People show up every day. They carry more than we see. They give in ways that are quiet, consistent, and easy to overlook.

And because it’s consistent, we begin to expect it. Because we expect it, we stop acknowledging it.

What Our Children Learn

Our children are always watching, not just what we say, but what we notice.

When we take the time to appreciate someone out loud… when we acknowledge who a person is, not just what they’ve done… we teach something deeper than manners.

We teach awareness. We teach respect. We teach them how to truly see people. And when that’s missing, something important is lost.

A Simple Practice

Try this for the next 30 days.

Each day, reach out to one person in your life. A parent. A friend. A sibling. A teacher. Anyone. Tell them something you appreciate about who they are, not just what they’ve done. Don’t expect anything back.

Just notice what happens.

Notice how it feels to say it. Notice how it changes the way you see people. Notice how it shifts your day.

The Gift That Remains

In the end, appreciation isn’t about the moment. It’s about what remains. The gift of being seen may be the greatest gift we can give another person.

Don’t wait for the perfect time. Don’t wait for the right words.

Just say it. Onwards together – with love and gratitude.