Blogs | Community Magazine

Build the Bayit

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February 2021

This past month, Bet Yaakov of the Jersey Shore High School launched a very special campaign for the women in the community. Bet Yaakov believes that the school is not only a place to educate its students, it’s also a place to disseminate spiritual growth throughout the community.

To that end, the “Build the Bayit” Campaign was launched. At a special mother/daughter Hanukah luncheon a video was shown explaining the details of this campaign. At a time when the world is struggling with many difficulties, the high school girls took it upon themselves to encourage others to bring zechut to our community. The idea of the campaign is to generate zechut toward building the Bayit – the Bayit of Hashem – the Bet Hamikdash. The students of the school got family members to sign up to the program, where every day for 30 days everyone received a text message detailing a small very doable mitsvah to do each day. The misvot were ones that could be done by anyone at any age and any spiritual level that they may be at.

Throughout the month over 200 participants in the program performed these misvot every day. There has been such great feedback from so many participants who have risen to the challenge of taking a step each day to improve their spiritual growth.

Important Community Message About The Monoclonal Antibody Treatment

We would like to bring to the attention of the community the importance of acting IMMEDIATELY after a COVID-19 Positive Test.

After launching a public awareness campaign, and great efforts to make monoclonal antibody treatments available locally, over 125 high risk people who are COVID positive in our community have been successfully treated and some likely have avoided hospitalization. If you test COVID positive and meet the criteria listed by the FDA (found at: https://www.fda.gov/media/143605/download), it is urgent that you obtain an antibody infusion as soon as possible after your positive test.

Our community patient advocates are keeping tabs on where the antibodies are available and how best to schedule you in for a slot. The infusion process is short and you should be back home in a few hours. It is best to get these antibodies as soon as possible after receiving a COVID positive PCR test result.

If you receive the antibody treatment, you should wait 90 days and then consult with your doctor before getting vaccinated. Please contact one of the community patient advocates listed below so that they can work with your doctor and schedule you for the outpatient infusion.

Patient Advocates to Contact

NYC: Alan Esses: 917-969-6620 / Nathan Hoffman 917-681-2969 / Nancy Sutton 718-614-6711

NJ: Maurice Zekaria 732-829-1124 / Ike D. Massry 732-598-9399

Florida: Gershon Fink, MD 786-521-1587 / Baruch Sandhaus 786-626-6261

Medical Centers offering Monoclonal Antibodies for Outpatient Infusion

Mt. Sinai
New York Community Hospital
Maimonides
HNMC, Teaneck
Monmouth Medical Center
Mt. Sinai of Miami Beach
Memorial Hospital
Aventura Hospital

New Jersey Expands Coronavirus Vaccinations to Seniors, Medical Conditions, and Smokers

New Jersey has opened up COVID-19 vaccinations to residents 65 and older, as well as those from 16 to 64 with serious medical conditions or who are smokers.

“Over the last several months, our administration has built the infrastructure and laid the groundwork to support New Jersey’s COVID-19 vaccination demand,” Governor Phil Murphy said. “Based on recommendations from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, we are ready to begin ramping up our vaccination efforts exponentially and are confident in our ability to provide every willing New Jersey resident with a vaccine when it is available and they are eligible.”

Those chronic conditions that allow for eligibility include: cancer, chronic kidney disease, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), Down syndrome, heart conditions, obesity, sickle cell disease, type 2 diabetes, and smokers.

The Lighter Side – February 2021

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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The Greatest Wish

Rupert, Dale, and Bubba, three middle-aged friends who never really made much of themselves, were sitting around complaining about the sorry state of their lives, when suddenly, an angel appeared and promised to grant each one of them a single wish.

Rupert immediately said, “I wish I were the President.” In an instant, Rupert found himself in the White House and in command of an entire nation.

Next, Dale said, “I wish I was the richest man in the world.” A moment later, Dale was on a on a private mega-yacht anchored off his own private island in the Caribbean, relaxing and enjoying the beautiful weather.

Finally, it was Bubba’s turn. Looking around and seeing that his longtime friends were gone, he said, “Gee, I feel lonely. I wish that Rupert and Dale were back here again with me!”

Jack V. Grazi

It’s All Latin

Mr. Morris, the 12th grade Latin teacher was always so involved in the text he was teaching that he practically never looked up at his students. He would call on a student for translation and explanation, and without realizing it, he often chose the same student day after day. Out of respect, the students wouldn’t point this out to him.

After being called on four days in a row, an exasperated Nathan asked advice from his friends who came up with a fool-proof plan.

The next day when the teacher said, “Nathan, translate and explain,” Nathan confidently replied, “Sorry, Mr. Morris, but Nathan is absent today.”

“All right,” said the teacher. “…so then you translate and explain.”

Hannah L.

The Vitality Secret

My wife recently ran into the housekeeper who used to clean our house many years ago and was surprised to hear that she was still at it, despite her advanced age. “How do you manage to do all the strenuous work housekeeping entails?” my wife asked.

“I do housework for clients who can’t see the dirt any better than I can,” she replied.

Jack V. Grazi

Lightning Hammer

During our home renovation, my wife was watching me drive in some nails. “You hammer like lightning,” she said.

“Really?” I replied, flattered.

“Yes, really…you never strike the same place twice.”

Alice K.

The Cheating Experiment

As the students began their final exam in science, little Tommy was nervous because he didn’t know most of the answers. Not wanting to fail, Tommy decided to copy all the answers off the boy sitting in front of him – the smartest boy in the class. When the test was over, Tommy handed the test to the teacher, confident that he did very well, but feeling bad that he cheated for the first time. As the teacher flipped through the tests, she noticed Tommy’s paper and called him up to her desk.

“Tommy,” she said, “It looks like you failed this test.”

“Failed?!” Tommy exclaimed. “How could I have failed, I’ll bet I answered every question right.”

“Not exactly,” the teacher said. “You answered the first question wrong and that was the most important.”

“Really? What was the first question and what did I answer?” Tommy asked.

“The first question,” the teacher answered slowly, “was, ‘Name’ and your answer was ‘Walter Bernstein.’”

Saide S.

Easiest Homework Ever

The teacher was collecting homework assignments from everyone in row four. When she passed Amy, she saw there was no paper on the desk, and she gave the young girl a disappointed look.

“Amy, where is your homework? This is the third time this week…”

Amy looked up innocently at the teacher and said, “But I followed your instructions exactly. You said the homework was ‘a piece of cake.’ I didn’t want to waste it, so I gave it to my baby brother to eat.”

Amiel T.

Food Service

Upon entering a local burger joint, Jason ordered a burger with a tomatoes and “minimal lettuce.” The woman behind the counter apologetically replied, “Sorry, but we only have iceberg lettuce.”

Ed G.

A Ticket to Ride

A motorist was speeding down the highway when a cop caught up with him and ticketed him for speeding. “What am I supposed to do with this?” the motorist grumbled as the policeman handed him the speeding ticket.

“Keep it,” the cop said. “When you collect four of them, you get a bicycle.”

Renda B.

Dad’s Advice

Phil was exhausted. His wife had just given birth and he had to watch their three older children for a few days. Although it was only for two hours a day, Phil was at his wits’ end and he had a splitting headache. Looking for some relief, he brought the kids over to his parents’ home for a visit. As soon as his father saw him, he noticed his poor condition.

“Phil, you look terrible,” he observed. “Why don’t I get you some aspirin?”

“No thanks, Dad,” Phil replied. “I just took two aspirins.”

“Well, it seems you didn’t follow the instructions,” his father said. Dad brought Phil a bottle and showed him the small print: “Take two aspirin” and “Keep away from children.”

Tutu Mulu

A Sure Cure

After suffering from a miserable cold for a week, Jeff visited his doctor and begged for relief. The doctor prescribed a pill, but it didn’t work. A week later, Jeff returned to the doctor, who gave him a shot. With no improvement in his condition and sicker than ever, Jeff visited the doctor a third time and said, “I’ve tried two medications you prescribed so far and neither of them helped. So before you recommend another treatment, you had better be sure it’s the right one.”

“Okay then, this is what I want you to do,” the doctor said. “Go home and take a hot bath. Then throw open all the windows and stand in the draft.”

“But I’ll get pneumonia!” protested Jeff.

“Exactly,” the doctor answered, “that I know how to treat!”

Abie C.

Inner Harmony

My therapist told me that the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake.

I feel better already.

A. N.

Spelling Test

Teacher: Billy, how do you spell “crocodile”? Billy: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L. Teacher: No, that’s incorrect. Billy: Maybe you think so, but you asked me how I spell it.

R. G.

Techno-Diner

Working on a computer all day has definitely messed with Sarah’s view of reality. We had just placed our lunch order, and as our waiter walked away, he slipped on a wet spot on the floor. “How about that?” she observed dryly. “Our server is down.”

Carey A.

Riddles – February 2021

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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Riddle: Cats & Dogs

SUBMITTED BY NANCY H.

Fido is staring only at Jamie, but Jamie is staring only at Felix. Fido is a dog and Felix is a cat. Jamie is either a cat or a dog, but you don’t know which. Given just this information, is a dog looking at a cat – or are you unable to know for sure?

Previous Month’s Riddle: A Numbers Game

What number comes next in each of these four mathematical sequences?
A) 6 9 12 15 18 ____

B) 29 25 21 17 13 ____

C) 2 4 8 16 32 ____

D) 13 17 19 23 29 ____

Solution:

A) 21 – multiples of 3
B) 9 – subtract 4 at each step
C) 64 – multiply by 2 each step
D) 31 – prime numbers in increasing order

Solved by: Meir Nakach, Mr. Lacher, S. Levy, David Weiss, Berta Kassab, Mazie Betesh, Morris Kabani, Big Mike, and The Dweck Family.

Junior Riddle: At The Market

SUBMITTED BY SION D.

The grocery store is charging the prices listed below for milk, juice, cheese, and butter. Your aunt buys one of each, plus spends an additional $7.50 on other products. In her purse, she has several $1, $2, $5, and $10 bills. What is
the least number of bills your aunt can use to pay for her groceries? (She does not have any coins.)

Milk: $2.25 / Juice: $2.75 / Cheese: $1.50 / Butter: $3.50

Previous Month’s Junior Riddle: Crack The Code

Each letter in the cryptogram below has been replaced by the letter that comes immediately after it in the alphabet. For example, B has replaced A, C has replaced B, and so on throughout the entire alphabet. Can you figure out the message below?

Dpohsbuvmbujpot po efdpejoh uijt tfdsfu nfttbhf. Zpv bsf b nbtufs tpmwfs!

Solution: Congratulations on decoding this secret message. You are a master solver!

Solved by: Meir Nakach, Moshe L., Abie Cohen, Raymond Dabbah, David Weiss, Berta Kassab, The Shmulster, Eliyahu Cohen, Lenore H., and Alice P.

Mabrouk – February 2021

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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Births – Baby Boy

Joey & Rachel Avidan

Moshe & Michal Shalam

Rabbi Morris & Frieda Mizrahi

Mr. & Mrs. Sol Bergman

Michael & Yvette Uziel

Hal & Milia Sitt

Births – Baby Girl

Jack & Rose Shalam

Moshe & Shira Mizrahi

Jason & Frieda Betesh

Morris & Rachel Dweck

Bar Mitzvah

Victor Haim, son of Moshe and Claudette Cohen

Engagements

Phil Shelby to Sandi Grazi

Morris Cameo to Frieda Eiler

Abraham Kizon to Aviva Setton

Moshe Cohen to Caroline Cohen

Benjamin Ben Haim to Jamie Dweck

Sonny Chehebar to Celia Salame

Abe Madeb to Jane Zakay

Menashe Razak to Chana Malakh

Joey Uziel to Jacqueline Franco

Joseph Bahary to Rivka Moses

Weddings

David Adjmi to Sarah Yedid

Raymond Gindi to Esther Mochon

Albert Sitt to Betty Ghonoja

Once Upon a Thyme – Classic Chile

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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ADINA YAAKOV

Thick, rich and flavorful, chile is one of those dishes that top the comfort food charts. Try it on its own, or serve it with corn chips or warm tortillas. Chile is also tasty over rice, fries or potato wedges. Chile can also be used as a hot dog topping, which takes it to the next level. Last but not least, my favorite way to use chile is as Sloppy Joe meat, stuffed inside fresh rolls.

INGREDIENTS:

1 lb. ground beef
1 onion, diced
2 tbsp canola oil
5 cloves crushed garlic
1 green pepper, diced
1 cup chicken or beef broth
14 oz. can crushed tomatoes
1 can tomato sauce
1 can black beans
1 can kidney beans
1 tbsp kosher salt
1⁄2 tsp cayenne
1⁄2 tsp smoked paprika
2 tsp cumin

OPTIONAL TOPPINGS:

• Lime wedges
• Tortilla or corn chips • Scallions
• Parve sour cream

In a large pot, heat oil and add onions. Cook until transparent and then add diced green pepper and cook for an additional 5 minutes.
Add ground beef and cook until browned. Break up any large chunks with your spoon.
Mix in cumin, cayenne, paprika, and salt.

4. Pour in drained beans, crushed tomatoes, tomato sauce, and broth and bring to a boil.

5. Lower flame to a simmer while stirring until the chili thickens.

6. Serve warm with your favorite toppings.

Dinner Done! – That Famous Coconut Crunch Cake Just Got Way Better

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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Dinner Done! – That Famous Coconut Crunch Cake Just Got Way Better

An incredible, moist, coconut-y cake is paired with the famous coconut crunch topping. The only question is…why did it take so long for this match to come about?

THE NEW CRUNCH CAKE

CAKE:

1 3⁄4 cups flour
3⁄4 cup unsweetened coconut flakes

1 1⁄2 cups sugar
1 1⁄2 teaspoons baking powder

1⁄4 teaspoon salt
1⁄2 cup canned full-fat coconut milk (mixed to an even consistency)

1⁄2 cup oil
4 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

COCONUT CRUNCH:

1⁄2 cup coconut flakes (sweetened or unsweetened)
2⁄3 cup flour

1⁄4 cup brown sugar
1⁄4 cup oil

ICING:

2 cups confectioners’ sugar

1⁄4 cup boiling water

2 tablespoons oil

1⁄2 teaspoon vanilla

Preheat oven to 350F. Line and grease an 8-inch springform pan or Bundt cake pan.
In a bowl, combine all ingredients for the cake. Mix well. Add batter to prepared pan and bake for 40-45 minutes. Let cool.
Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Combine all Coconut Crunch ingredients. Spread on prepared baking sheet and bake for 12-15 minutes.
Combine all icing ingredients. Once cake is cool, drizzle icing over cake and add coconut crunch. The icing is meant to act as a “glue” to attach the crumbs to the cake. Continue to drizzle more layers of icing and crunch until all the crunch is “stuck” to the cake. Finish with a final drizzle of icing. You might not need all.

Yield: 8-10 servings; 1 cake

Sweetened or unsweetened coconut?

We used unsweetened coconut inside the cake. For the topping, the original recipe calls for sweetened coconut, so we left the “famous” topping as-is. Either would be interchangeable.

Budget for Utilities and Home Maintenance

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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Budget for Utilities and Home Maintenance

KAREN BEHFAR

You budgeted and planned how to find your dream home, but now how will you maintain it?

You may have rented before and were not responsible for utilities and maintenance. As a homeowner you will now be responsible for utilities and any wear and tear that needs help. Make sure to include these things in your budget and have
a way of paying for them. You cannot know exactly what the cost of home maintenance and utilities will be for the house you buy. However, you can get a rough estimate of utilities
by requesting the utility costs from the seller for the last
12 months. In addition, your home inspection will show you what home repairs you will need to make. This will give you a general idea of how much you will need to spend on home maintenance.

Consider Other Costs

Other monthly expenses to consider are homeowners insurance and property taxes. The cost for homeowners insurance will depend on the size of the home, the location, the value of your personal possessions, and the age of the home. Property taxes are collected by county, city, and state governments, so your property taxes will depend on your home’s taxable value.

Avoid Increasing Debt

Income and employment history are two of the most important factors mortgage lenders consider. Your job history needs to be steady, and your debt-to-income ratio matters. These are two major factors that lenders consider when determining how much of a mortgage you can afford. Avoid making big purchases that will increase your debt!

The Walk-Through

Mabrouk! You found the home of your dreams! You have one last thing to do before you close – the walk-through.

This is arranged by your real estate agent (another benefit of having an agent!). The goal is to ensure nothing has changed since you last saw the house, that any repairs you agreed upon with the seller have been done, and all the terms have been met. This is your hour to inspect the house to make sure all is up to your standards. Take the time and check EVERYTHING before you put your name on the dotted line and move into your beautiful new home. If any issues crop up your agent will bring in professionals to quote a price and smooth over any bumps. And one of the benefits of using The Behfar Team is our virtual tour, in which we can actually see if anything has changed since the first home inspection.

The Year in Review

It has been nearly a full year since COVID-19 started. We initially thought that the real estate market would ground to a

halt. We definitely listed and went into contract on a few homes in early March. But many sellers and buyers were staying put, trying to gauge where the market was at. The market began to pick up in May when buyers saw low interest rates and took advantage of it. The benefit of low interest rates is that it gives buyers more buying power and leverage. Buyers are now able to afford a home that was previously out of their range. Renters, who were not even thinking of buying, realize they can now buy at the same price that they’re renting for. Once people start looking, they tell their friends and it creates a snowball effect. I have never seen so many buyers on the market. There was a correction in the market.

For every home we put up there are multiple buyers and offers. Homes are moving along quicker than they were a year and a half ago. The luxury homes, lots, and vacant houses that need complete gut renovation are the ones that are sitting longer on the market. Costs of renovation have gone up and that is definitely playing a factor in the prices of luxury homes.

PROPEL Profile in Courage: Lauren Dayan

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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Lauren Dayan likes to say, “I’m just like all mothers.” But it’s hard to believe! A graduate of Hillel Yeshiva, Lauren married shortly after her 18th birthday. A “normal life” followed. After three sons, Lauren was ecstatic to discover that she was expecting a girl. But when Renee was born, life took a turn. Lauren held Renee for a few minutes, then she was whisked away to the NICU. Renee’s journey with challenges still continues today. After shuttling from hospital to hospital, Renee ended up in Boston Children’s Hospital where she remained for almost a year. Lauren would spend all week with Renee and then fly home for weekends to be with the rest of her family. Lauren says that she could not have gotten through everything without their love and support. When Renee came home, Lauren recalls, “I could accept our ‘new normal’ or say, ‘Why me?’ Everyone has challenges – and this was ours.” Community volunteers stepped up to help. Lauren says, “My sons (now 20, 22, and 24) are amazing. They have helped shape my life. Their compassion, love, and support for their sister and Mommy helped me to continue to be the mother that I am.”

When Renee was preschool age, Lauren contacted Magen David, but warned them, “She isn’t like a normal kid.” Rabbi Hilsenrath responded, “What’s normal?!” and Renee was accepted. With Terri Mizrahi’s leadership, Renee came to school with a nurse and received the special services she required. With Renee at school, Lauren determined to return to school herself. She wanted to help others and decided to pursue a career in occupational therapy. She earned her associate degree at Kingsborough Community College, then transferred to Brooklyn College.

At age 11, Renee transferred to the Shefa School, a Jewish community day school that specializes in special education. At Shefa, Renee quickly became part of the school family. One day, the psychologist called and said, “Renee’s not acting right.” But by the time Renee got home, she seemed her usual self. That weekend, as she was studying for finals, Lauren noticed Renee began slurring her words and complained of numbness in her arm. Having just taken a course in stroke and aphasia, Lauren says, “I knew something was going on. A round of hospital visits and misdiagnoses began. The family pediatrician said that Renee was having transient strokes, where she would “space out” and, by the time they got to the hospital, be back to herself. Renee’s parents were told that these episodes were just psychological and behavioral issues. Not convinced, the Dayans returned to Boston Children’s Hospital, to discover that Renee was having strokes and needed brain surgery, which would be scheduled in a few months. In the meantime, Renee continued to go to school, with Lauren at her side.

Lauren reminisces, “We plan and Gd laughs.” Renee had a massive stroke, which led to yet another year in the hospital. Before Renee’s homecoming, the house was modified to meet her needs. Nurses, therapists, family members, and volunteers were engaged to help. With Lauren coordinating the entire picture, life became normal. Renee was bussed to school at Blythedale Children’s Hospital in Westchester County, and Lauren returned to college. Then Renee caught the flu and almost died. Lauren got permission to learn remotely – before COVID! This continued when the pandemic struck, and all colleges transitioned to distance learning. Lauren achieved her degree with the high honor of summa cum laude.

At this point, Lauren’s future focus changed. Inspired by Renee’s doctors, therapists, and caregivers, Lauren explored how she could help other parents who experience sudden trauma. Her experiences taught her that she could be a source of compassion and support. Lauren started a group at Blythedale for parents “who I met in the hallway whose lives were turned upside down.” Lauren felt they needed to hear from others that even though things would be different, they would be okay. “Perfect,” she says, “is boring.” COVID complicated matters. For three months, Renee could not leave the hospital, and family could not visit. Now, Renee goes home for Shabbat through Sunday to be with her family.

Lauren set her sights on the Social Work program at Columbia University. She reached out to PROPEL for help with the application process. Working with the PropelED team, Lauren was accepted for the next cohort. She will begin her graduate studies in September 2021. Lauren’s immediate goal is to get Renee home with the care that she needs. Lauren knows that it will be a challenge to be a wife, mother, caregiver, and graduate student. But, she says, “I feel that Hashem helped me through all these hurdles – this is just another one.”

How Our Beliefs Affect Our Children

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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TAMMY SASSOON, M.S.ED

Although there is so much more to parenting than how to get kids to cooperate, it is usually the first question people ask when they call to schedule a consultation.

Discipline is just one piece of the parenting puzzle, but it is a very important piece, and every home needs it in order to function in a healthy way.

Let us work with the key principle that children act according to what their parents believe about them. You can have a mother who is blind, deaf, and mute, but whatever she is feeling about her child will be sensed by him or her through the mother’s vibes.

TAKE THE FOLLOWING EXAMPLE:

Two mothers each have eight-year-old boys with tons of energy. Mother A gets excellent cooperation while her son remains very energetic in a healthy way. After all, biology and temperament are natural, right? Mother B’s life is a nightmare. She cannot get her son to follow a single instruction in the house. After all, biology and temperament are natural, right?

WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE?

Mother A believes that every single child is capable of being respectful, regardless of energy level, so she is experiencing that respect with her son. Mother B, who worries that maybe her child is not capable of being respectful, will see that he is not respectful of her. Mother A feels relaxed knowing that every child has a unique place in the world, and she simply looks for effective parenting strategies to help her son utilize his tremendous amount of energy in a positive way. She reads books and consults with experts from time to time. Mother B is so worried about her son that he feels her worry vibes, and then starts to believe that he is a source of worry to his family. This stress causes him to act in ways that his mother believes are appropriate for him.

When our children misbehave (both children and adults do make mistakes sometimes), we need to remain calm, even amidst the pain we may feel, so that they get the message that mistakes don’t define people. We want our children to always remember that they are a piece of Hashem, and their misbehaviors are nothing more than a poor choice.

Each moment is a new fresh moment, so never interact with your child today in a way that shows you are stuck on the mistake they made yesterday.

I can personally attest that I have never met a client whose children were incapable of accepting authority and limits. There is a wealth of information on exactly how to set the limits, but that’s for another article. Before you even learn any strategies, make sure that your mindset is in check with healthy thinking: Every child is capable of being respectful. No exceptions. Set limits with love and confidence, and watch where it takes your family.

One on One with Mozeelle Forman

Community Magazine

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February 2021

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ELLEN GELLER KAMARAS

Mozelle Forman, née Kassin, is a creative, passionate, and giving person and is a woman of many talents. She is a clinical social worker and psychotherapist, a writer, and an artist. On a personal level, she is a loving daughter, sister, mother, and savta. Mozelle is so proud of her children and is over the moon about her grandchildren!

Before our interview, I watched a video of Mozelle’s on marriage counseling. I was moved by the empathy in her voice and the joy I heard as she described a couple’s journey “to heal and grow.” When we talked, I noticed the authentic and heartfelt desire and passion to help her clients navigate their relationships effectively.

FAMILY HISTORY

Mozelle, daughter of Carol Calderone and Meyer J. Kassin, zt”l, is the oldest of five children. Meyer was the first of his siblings to be born in the U.S. and Carol was born in Alexandria, Egypt, raised in Israel where she served in the army, and later moved to the United States. Meyer’s father, Rabbi Jacob Kassin, zt”l, was the chief rabbi of the Sephardic community for 60 years. Meyer’s brother, Rabbi Shaul Kassin, zt”l, devoted his energies to the spiritual growth of the community until his passing in 2018. Meyer’s brother-in-law Hacham Baruch ben Haim, zt”l, was married to Meyer’s sister Charlotte, and dedicated his life to educating and guiding the community for over 50 years.

From the beginning of our interview, it was clear how much Mozelle’s family’s legacy of love of Torah, Israel, and community shaped her into the woman she is today. Since she was a little girl, Mozelle was aware of the huge contributions made by her rabbinical grandfather and uncles. Her father, Meyer, zt”l, earned rabbinical smicha and then went on to join his brothers in business. Meyer dedicated significant time and great effort as a community leader. He served as President in several shuls, both in Brooklyn and Deal (including Shaare Zion, Deal Synagogue, and Ohel Yaakob).

Carol, a loving and devoted stay-at-home mom, was also a very significant role model for Mozelle. Mozelle observed her mother’s empathic manner and her uncanny intuitiveness to read people and to know how to advise them. Mozelle processed the positive messages she received, recognizing that “this is what we do in life, we help people however best we can, that we lead by serving the community we love and respect.”

EDUCATION

Mozelle attended Magen David Yeshivah elementary school, where she graduated as Valedictorian, and Yeshivah of Flatbush High School. She takes pride in being a “lifelong learner.”

Mozelle studied at Brooklyn College after high school and married Emile Mimran while she was in college. She majored in English, and gave birth to their first child, Carolyn, while she was earning her bachelor’s degree. Mozelle opted to be a stay-at- home mom when her children were young. She also managed to carve out time to volunteer at Sephardic Bikur Holim and Sephardic Community Center. Serving the community was a given for her. To Mozelle, family was also her legacy and meant everything to her. “Family and community are intertwined for me.” Adam was born two years after Carolyn and Reina, the youngest, followed three years later.

When Reina was six and in school full-time, Mozelle resumed her studies, and given her family legacy, she chose social work as “the best way to serve our community.” She enrolled in Wurzweiler School of Social Work and earned a master’s degree in Social Work in two years. Fortunately, Mozelle was on the same schedule as her children. “It was a wonderful experience, they were so excited. They would say, ‘Mommy, go do your homework! Did you study for your test? Mommy, can we make you lunch?’ Because I was busy with school, my children became more independent and stepped up to the plate in age-appropriate ways.”

CAREER PATH BEGINNINGS IN SOCIAL WORK

After receiving her MSW, Mozelle’s first job as a licensed clinical social worker was at the SCC in Brooklyn, where she was placed as a student intern during grad school. Mozelle became the Director of Social Services. She was later employed at Ilan High School for 12 years and wore many hats there including Director of Student Services.

Mozelle loved working with students. She was strongly influenced by Dr. Haim Ginott (1922-1973), who was a highly respected teacher, child psychologist, psychotherapist, and parent educator. He taught parents how to use a language of compassion and understanding and he believed that both parents and teachers should lead and inspire by example. “Treat a child as though he already is the person he’s capable of becoming,” he wrote in his best-selling book Between Parent and Child.

PRIVATE PRACTICE AS A RELATIONSHIP THERAPIST

While she was at Ilan High School, Mozelle started to build her private practice and pursued her training as a relationship therapist. The Imago Relationship Theory really spoke to Mozelle. Imago, developed by Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt, is a form of relationship and couples therapy that focuses on transforming conflict into healing and on growth through relational connection. “We are all trying to heal and grow. We do that in relationships, and in marriage you are going to find someone who is going to challenge you to be better than you are. The challenges can be painful but are also a sign of growth.” Mozelle was mentored in Imago by Hedy Schleifer, an internationally known master relationship builder.

Mozelle refers to individual and couples therapy as “relationship counseling.” “I believe if we lived in a bubble, by ourselves, we would have no issues; it’s only in relationships that we get triggered, and that’s when we are tested in how well we are doing and how well we can interact. I ask a client: ‘What is it that you are doing or not doing that is impacting your relationship?’

“Individually, we each bring something to a third entity, the marriage, which becomes the client. I encourage couples to learn to communicate what they need rather than blaming each other for what is wrong. Observing ‘what happens to our marriage when I do A and you do B, and what can we do to make that different?’ is the ultimate focus of my work with couples.”

Mozelle has become a sought-after speaker for many of our community’s institutions. She has developed parenting and marital workshops for SBH, communication workshops for Hillel Yeshiva, and teacher training workshops for many schools.

MOZELLE’S CREATIVE SIDE

In addition to relationship therapy, Mozelle’s passions include writing and art.

Mozelle always enjoyed expressing herself through words and loved writing as a graduate student. When her children were little, Mozelle was asked to create a poem to be used in a Mother’s Day card that was sold to raise funds for Magen David Yeshivah and she published a weekly newsletter at Ilan High School. Mozelle is a contributing writer for Community Magazine and for several years she authored a monthly column called “Healthy Homelife.” Her goal was to raise awareness and provide tools for building healthy marriages and relationships. Mozelle was honored to write an article for Community Magazine about the 13th Siyum HaShas, a global celebration of the daily DafYomiTalmudstudyprogram. Ayearago,Mozellegaveupwritingthe “Healthy Homelife” column to pursue her current passion of painting with pastels.

Mozelle began to paint with pastels as a hobby and discovered that she loved it! She joined a pastel society and submitted her paintings to competitions. Mozelle won the top award at the Waltuch Gallery in Tenafly. The prize was to have her own solo show where she sold several of her paintings. “It was so thrilling that this hobby parlayed into something wonderful, a new career.” (Check out Mozelle’s paintings on her website, http:// mozelleformanfineart.com/)

THE COVID-19 PIVOT

Mozelle continued to exhibit her paintings at other galleries and then COVID-19 hit. Although her planned shows were cancelled, she still paints almost daily in her dedicated studio and she shares her work on Instagram. “Painting has kept me sane during the pandemic and I find it very gratifying and soothing to create and share my works.”

In response to the uptick in anxiety that the pandemic has generated, Mozelle developed a four-part workshop at SBH to address community members’ anxieties. She has also provided grief counseling and other support services to her clients and to the community.

To relax, Mozelle loves to read historical fiction, mysteries, and detective stories and she enjoys yoga and Pilates.

You can connect with Mozelle by email at mozelleforman@ gmail.com or on Instagram @mozelle.forman.