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The Case – Better Late Than Never

Rachel rented an elaborate gown for her granddaughter’s upcoming wedding.  The terms of the rental included a one-time wearing of the gown for the price of fifteen hundred dollars.  After wearing the gown on the night of the festive wedding occasion, the next morning Rachel experienced pain on one side of her body and shortness of breath. She wisely phoned an ambulance and was rushed to the hospital before losing consciousness. In the hospital she recovered quickly and was discharged only a week after being admitted. When she returned home, she remembered that it was her responsibility to return the gown to the store it was rented from within three days of usage. When she finally called the store and explained her predicament, the store owner patiently explained that since the gown was not returned as scheduled, he lost a paying customer that was scheduled to rent the gown. Rachel explained that she lived alone, and her family was unaware of the urgency of the prompt return of the gown. The store owner sympathized with her condition but reasoned that she rented the gown knowing the consequences of a late return. In Bet Din, he further claimed that he understands that Rachel fell ill, however, renting a gown is like renting a car, if for any reason you do not return it, you are required to pay.  

Is Rachel required to reimburse the store owner with an additional fifteen hundred dollars in damages for the lost customer? How should the Bet Din rule and why? 

Torah Law 

According to the ruling of the Shulhan Aruch, in the event a rented item is not returned as stipulated by contract, a renter can be held liable for the rent and/or damages sustained by the owner as a result of the late return. 

Notwithstanding, by rule of the Shulhan Aruch, a renter who is unable to return an item due to circumstances beyond their control is not necessarily required to pay the owner in the event of a late return.  

If by terms of the contract the rental payment is a fixed amount for the usage of the item and not per day, the renter is exempt if he is incapable of returning the item on time. If, however, the terms of the contract require the renter to pay per day, he is compelled to pay rent for each day he is late, regardless of all reason and circumstance.  

The underlying reasoning for this distinction is that the legal definition of a daily rental is payment for the time the item is available to the renter. Whether or not the renter maximizes the usage of the item rented or is incapable of using the item, nevertheless, he is required to pay per day. His verbal or written contract requires him to pay for the time the item is entrusted to him, regardless of the amount of usage or benefit he receives.  

However, if the rental agreement is for a designated usage, the agreement is terminated immediately after that specific usage. When the renter subsequently chooses not to return the item, he is liable for damages the owner sustains. If, however, the renter is incapable of returning the item due to circumstances beyond his control, he is absolved from paying the damages sustained by the owner. Unless stipulated otherwise, the owner is not entitled to collect indirect damage caused by extenuating circumstance.  

The above ruling, absolving a renter incapable of returning an object, is limited to instances in which the renter was unable to notify or appoint another party to return the item on his behalf. If, however, the renter could have spared the loss to the owner, he is viewed as negligent and is required to compensate the owner for the damage he caused. 

Additionally, the renter is only absolved if the item was not used to his benefit during the interim of its late return. If the renter benefited, he is required to compensate the owner for the damages he caused. If one benefits from damage he caused, he is liable for payment.  

As mentioned above, the exemption of a late return due to circumstances beyond one’s control is not applicable to instances in which the item was rented per day.  

VERDICT: Extenuating Circumstances 

Our Bet Din absolved Rachel of paying the store owner for the late return of the gown. As mentioned in Torah law, a renter is not liable if due to circumstances beyond his control he is incapable of returning the item on time. Rachel was hospitalized and remained unconscious and incoherent for three days before she was able to notify anyone of the delay. At that point the damage to the store owner was already done.  Although the store owner indeed sustained a loss, Rachel is not responsible for secondary damages she caused due to extenuating circumstance beyond her control.  

It is important to note that this exemption is not applicable to one who pays rent per day. One who pays rent per day is required to pay rent for every day late, regardless of the circumstance. Rachel, however, rented the gown for a one-time usage and not per day. She is therefore exempt from compensating the store owner for his damages. The store owner’s comparison of Rachel’s renting the gown to a daily car rental was therefore rejected by our Bet Din. The store owner’s claim that Rachel was aware of the consequences of a late return was also rejected, as the contract did not specify her liability even in a circumstance beyond her control.

YOU BE THE JUDGE 

Not All Fun and Games 

Annie operates a playgroup for toddlers from her home, located on the main floor of a three-story apartment house. She opened the playgroup nearly a year ago and did not receive any complaints from the neighbors in her building. Sally, the neighbor on the third floor, without warning, opened a file in our Bet Din demanding that Annie is to close her playgroup immediately. The basis for Sally’s complaint included congestion in the entrance way of the building, the noise coming from the playgroup throughout the day, and the depreciation of the value of her apartment by allowing a business to operate from the main floor of the building. In her defense, Annie responded that Sally’s complaints were not substantial issues. As per the congestion in the entrance way, Annie defended that not all the children arrive at the same time. Rather, most often the children arrive one by one in the span of an hour. They are picked up midday during hours that most of the residents of the building are either at work or are out shopping. Annie continued that the noise factor was a frivolous complaint, especially from a neighbor living on the third floor. She further defended that she is not the first person to open a playgroup from their home, and never heard of the value of a property depreciating as a result of a playgroup. Annie suggested that Sally was jealous of her successful business and that is the reason Sally is only complaining after nearly a year. Sally countered that the reason she did not complain earlier is because she originally thought she could handle the disturbances, but she now realizes that it is beyond her ability to do so.  

How should the Bet Din rule, in favor of Sally or Annie, and why?

A Golden Lesson

Imagine never becoming angry or upset. Imagine living every day with joy and peace of mind. The Orchot Tzaddikim writes (Shaar HaSimchah) that someone who has full emunah and bitachon in Hashem will always be happy no matter what is happening, because he knows that Hashem is the cause of everything that happens and Hashem only does what is best for him.

Rav Lugassi told a story about the mekubal Rabbi Daniel Frisch who lived in our times. He wrote many books including the Masok MiDevash edition of the Zohar HaKadosh. On one occasion, he came to America to raise funds to print his sefarim. He stayed at the home of a very respectable family. While there, he continued his writing and avodat hakodesh. In general, he was sickly; his fingers were extremely bloated due to infections in his hands. It was very hard for him to write, but he did so anyway with incredible self-sacrifice. Although it was difficult, even in America he stayed up writing till the late hours of the night. The family hosting him was so proud to have this tzaddik with them.

One night, toward the end of his stay, one of the young adults in the family went up to the rabbi’s room to ask him some questions. At the time, the Rabbi was deeply engrossed in his writings, but he happily paused to speak to the boy. During the conversation, the boy accidentally knocked over the cup of grape juice that he was drinking and it spilled all over the Rabbi’s manuscripts, ruining many pages of hours of work. The boy didn’t know where to put himself. He tried to clean it up, but the damage was done. “I am so sorry, Rabbi. Please forgive me, please.” The Rabbi quickly calmed him down, looked at him with his soothing eyes and said the following impactful words, “You are asking me for forgiveness. But there is something you need to know. Many years before I was born, in fact many years before anyone in this world was born, Hashem, in His infinite wisdom, wrote down what is going to happen to every single person who would ever live. Of course, things could be changed, but there is a plan for every individual according to the needs of the soul. Hashem wrote down that on this day at this time, the writings of a Jew named Daniel Frisch should have this juice spilled upon them. What could possibly be bad about Hashem’s plan for me?”

Those were simple words of emunah that not only kept the Rabbi calm and not only calmed down the boy, but they also taught us a golden lesson on how to live our lives with emunah.

It’s not easy to deal with the everyday annoyances when things don’t go the way we had hoped. But if we always remember that everything was planned in advance by the One Who knows better than we do, we will be able to accept everything.

Preparing for a Family Wedding

You pick up the phone and soak in the wonderful news: They’re finally engaged! And the wedding date has already been set. You feel a bit lightheaded when you hear that the big day is in a month or two! 

The future bride or groom may be a sibling, in-law, or other close relative, and we know the preparation for any family wedding is surrounded by much excitement and anticipation. In our community, where engagements are relatively short and the wedding happens pretty quickly, those who need to prepare for it can feel delight tinged with a sense of overwhelm. Here are some steps you can take to ease the pressure and help ensure that you and your children can all arrive at the hall calm and ready to bring lots of joy to the bride and groom. 

Right Together, Left Together 

So you hear that some, or even all, of your children will be marching down the aisle before the kallah makes her grand entrance. Whether your children are toddlers or pre-teens, it is best for them to practice marching in advance.  But there is no need for “marching practice” to be as pressure-filled as homework. This is the perfect opportunity to use your creative side and turn it into a game. 

Stage a mock-wedding in your home, and let each of your children rehearse marching down the hallway. Teach each child to start with the right foot, and then bring the left foot forward so the two feet are side-by-side. Show them how to take the same step once again, this time leading with the left foot. Demonstrate how to make this into a cohesive march, and rehearse until they are able to make it all the way down the makeshift aisle.  

In a few weeks’ time, when your children find themselves in a colossal brightly-lit room, with hundreds of people surrounding them and the rose-covered huppah facing them, they will be prepared to give a flawless march! 

Petticoats and Tuxedos 

Each child needs special wedding attire to wear to the big event. Younger girls will shine in flower-girl dresses, and the older ones will wear ball gowns. Younger boys will look adorable in miniature tuxedos, and the older ones will do fine in freshly-pressed suits. 

You have the option to buy something new for each child, but for a more economical route, visit one of the numerous community wedding gemachs or bring out the wardrobe from a past family wedding and ask a good tailor to make a few changes. Adding rhinestones, ribbons, and lace are great ways to bring fresh accents to a tired look. Whatever you decide to dress your children in, make sure all outfits are tailored, cleaned, and pressed at least a week in advance. 

Get a Sitter 

Of course, even the tiniest members of your family have been invited to the wedding, and they are all expected to attend. However, little children need constant supervision, which is quite difficult to provide when you are busy greeting guests and dancing with the bride or her mother. So it’s best to hire a babysitter or find a family friend who is willing to attend the wedding and offer an extra set of hands. When the pictures and ceremony are done, you can bring  the babysitter and your small children home, settle everyone in, and return to the wedding assured that everyone is supervised and getting a good night’s sleep. 

Speaking of Sleep… 

It’s going to be a long night! So even if you plan on bringing your children home in the middle of the wedding, make sure all of them (yes, even the ones that claim they are not tired!) get some rest the day of. The last thing you want is for your children to be bleary-eyed and hysterical during the wedding. So, set aside some naptime in the hours before the wedding, so everyone is alert, awake, and excited for this most special evening. 

Family weddings are special occasions that only come along every so often. That is why it’s so important to give children the tools to capture the joy of the moment. Prepare ahead of time so that when the night of the wedding finally arrives, your family will be ready to revel in the celebration

Once Upon a Thyme – Orange Creamsicle Ice Pops

ADINA YAAKOV

Nothing beats the summer warmth quite like a refreshing cold treat. This creamsicle recipe uses 
tangy orange juice concentrate along with sweet vanilla cream, which results in a satisfying 
combination of sweet but tart. Be sure to make a double batch to keep in your freezer for 
whenever your sweet tooth strikes. Please note that the orange juice concentrate in this recipe 
is not reconstituted, it is blended with coconut milk and sugar to make the orange sorbet. 
 

Recipe:
2 cans coconut milk
1 cup sugar
1 can Pure Frozen Orange Juice Concentrate with No Pulp
1 8 oz container of non-dairy topping (like RichWhip)
1 tsp vanilla extract
 

Directions:
1. Whip non-dairy topping according to instructions with vanilla extract until stiff peaks form.
Set aside.
2. Place coconut milk, sugar, and slightly thawed orange juice concentrate into a food
processor and blend.
3. Carefully pour orange/coconut mixture into about ¾ of the ice pop molds. Place Whip on
top of the coconut/orange mixture, being careful to fill and press down to prevent any air
pockets.
4. Place the popsicle stick inside and freeze for 7 hours or overnight. Run warm water over
the mold to remove ice pop.  

  1. Keep frozen in an airtight container separated by parchment paper until ready to serve.

M&S Summer Night League Gears Up with Top Notch Captains at the Helm

Sam Sutton 

M&S is heading into their 15th season as the community’s premiere softball night league. This year M&S is excited to welcome back its generous sponsors for the 2022 season, Zeh Arak and Mill Basin Yeshiva Academy. 

The 2022 M&S summer night league season is just few weeks away and that means it’s time to introduce this summer’s cast of captains. 

Sammy Esses and Teddy Ishak 

The tandem of Sammy Esses and Teddy Ishak are back, and they will be going for their third consecutive World Series title. This is a feat that has never been done before and the target will be squarely on their backs

Michael “Sabon” Salomon 

M&S’s first ever inducted hall of famer Michael “Sabon” Salomon has his eyes set on his fifth title as a captain. After losing in last season’s World Series, “Sabon” has had a long offseason. 

Michael Cohen 

League legend Michael Cohen will making his rookie debut as a captain. Michael is one of the most decorated players in league history. To his credit, “MC” is a three-time MVP award winner, four-time Gold Glove award winner, and two-time champion.

Albert Sitt 

In his fifth season in the league, Albert Sitt, who captained the expansion team 1.5 back in his rookie year in 2018, was fortunate to be M&S’s captain lottery winner last season for a right to captain a team. Albert has two World Series championships in his young career along with two Gold Gloves in RF.  

Raymond “Berry”  Esses 

M&S stalwart Raymond “Berry”  Esses is back at the helm. Berry is no stranger to winning, as he has five championships to his credit and was an integral part of each of them. When it comes to professionalism and captaincy, Raymond is the one who comes to mind.

Steven J. Gindi 

In his tenth season in M&S, Steven J. Gindi is back as a captain for the sixth consecutive season. Steven is notorious for being one of the best on-field captains in the league. Steven has captained a World Series title team back in 2017 and is yearning for another opportunity to hoist the cup.

Aaron “Hank” Dweck 

The seventh and final captain this upcoming season is Aaron “Hank” Dweck. Entering his eighth season in the league, “Hank has accomplished what some have not done in their careers. Hank is a Rookie of the Year winner, Gold Glove winner, Batting Title winner, Comeback Player of the Year winner, and lastly an MVP winner. The one piece of hardware missing from Hanks’ trophy case is a championship.

To stay up to date on all league multimedia including highlight reels of games and talk shows where league commissioners give their in-depth analysis on all league news – follow the league’s Instagram @MandS_Baseball and the league’s YouTube Channel www.youtube.com/samjsutton.

The Holiness of the Wedding Day

“Kol sasson vekol simhah, kol hatan vekol kallah…” 

In the footsteps of a young couple’s engagement comes a dizzying whirlwind of preparation for the upcoming wedding. Shopping for gowns, furniture, suits as well finding an apartment takes over a good chunk of the schedule of the soon-to-be bride and groom. And as they run around, preparing for their new life together, it becomes easy to forget about just that: that they are preparing to spend the rest of their lives together.  

Before the couple knows it, the countdown on the calendar winds down until it has been entirely crossed off, and the wedding day arrives. On this day, that the couple has dreamed of for so long, it is natural to become submerged in the nitty-gritty – getting dressed for the occasion, taking pictures and greeting guests – nearly forgetting what this most extraordinary day is all about. 

It is crucial for the couple to take a step back from the flurry of activity that surrounds the day, and recognize that the wedding is, in fact, the foundation of their future. The wedding day, encased in purity and sanctity, gives the couple a unique opportunity as they cross over the threshold from singlehood into married life. 

The Gates of Heaven Stand Wide Open 

The Talmud Yerushalmi states that on their wedding day, a bride and groom are granted complete atonement for all their sins. In essence, this makes the wedding day a kind of “Yom Kippur” for the couple. As they stand pure, their prayers on this day are especially powerful. Prior to the wedding, a couple should be aware that the gates of prayer are wide open to them throughout this holy time, and particularly as they stand underneath the huppah where the Shechinah dwells.  

The couple should do all that they can to seize this prime opportunity for tefillah. Yes, enjoying the wedding is also of upmost importance, but the bride and groom should each take time to beseech Hashem for a peaceful, loving, and joyous home. These prayers create a seed that will form the root of their bayit ne’eman be’Yisrael, and with Hashem’s help, bear blessing, health, peace, and prosperity throughout the rest of their lives.  

Take Notes 

It is normal for the couple to become overwhelmed, and in the excitement of the moment, forget what they intended to pray for. Therefore, it is a good idea for the bride and groom to take time before the wedding to write a list of what they wish to pray for.  

When penning the list, the bride and groom should note that this is a time to ask for a successful marriage, children, health. and longevity. They can also ask for family members, friends, and community members to have success in all their endeavors. Adding to the list the names of those who are sick and struggling, and keeping them in mind during this holy day, is a beautiful act of giving. The couple can also pray for the wellbeing of the Jewish people as a whole and for Mashiah to come speedily and peacefully in our days.  

A Day of Prayers and Blessings for All 

Hundreds of people come out to rejoice with the bride and groom on their wedding day, and during the huppah, the guests should also take advantage of this momentous occasion to pray. As mentioned, the Shehinah is present during the huppah, and each guest should ensure to make the most of this unique opportunity for prayer. It is crucial to respect the holiness of the day by sitting quietly and dressing and behaving in a modest fashion.  

When dancing with the guests, the bride and groom can once again take the time to bless each one, wishing health, happiness and success for all. The Talmud teaches, “Anyone who prays for his fellow and he has that same need – he is answered first.” And so, when a bride and groom bless and pray for others, they are effectively making the best possible investment, as these tefillot will, with Hashem’s help, increase their own future happiness and success. 

Note to the bride and groom: you have a unique power of prayer on your wedding day, and you can use it to give to others and build a solid foundation for your own lives. So, as you walk into a beautiful life together, make it all the more beautiful by clutching onto the holiness of your wedding day and pouring out your hearts in prayer. 

The Scientific Wisdom of the Sages

How the Rabbis in the Gemara were Familiar with Scientific Truths Long Before Modern Research

Even in ancient times, people knew about medicine and cures for certain conditions. The Gemara mentions cures for many different maladies, including at least one cure that is more advanced than what medical technology offers today. It describes a type of surgery to remove a brain tumor, involving a drug given to the patient to put him to sleep, and a mixture of herbs that was boiled, cooled, and poured on the patient’s head until his skull became soft, allowing it to be cut open and the growth removed. Two millennia before MRIs and CT scans, medical practitioners had a method for determining the exact location of a brain tumor, and an incredibly detailed understanding of human anatomy.

Unfortunately, many, if not all, of those remedies were specific to that era, and with time, directions for their use were forgotten, as was much of the medical wisdom presented in the Talmud.

The Discovery of Bacteria

In recent centuries, of course, we have seen remarkable advances in the field of medicine. Before the microscope revealed to us the hidden world of bacteria, physicians never imagined that there exist creatures which are invisible to the naked eye.

The size of an average bacterium is about two microns by half a micron (a micron being a millionth of a meter, or a millionth of 39.37 inches). This means that laid end to end, there are 500,000 bacteria in a meter (or in 39.37 inches), or 2,000,000 lying side by side.

The first step towards discovering the existence of bacteria was taken by the Dutch scientist Antony van Leeuwenhoek (1632-1723), using an early form of microscope which he helped develop. This was a simple brass plate fitted with a single lens capable of magnifying 200 times. Despite its relatively weak power, it allowed Leeuwenhoek to discern tiny creatures moving within materials taken from between people’s teeth.

But it was only in the second half of the 19th century that the existence of bacteria and their role in transmitting disease was finally verified. The famous French scientist Louis Pasteur (1822-1895) was the most important 19th century researcher of microorganisms and their relationship to various diseases. After discovering the existence of bacteria, Pasteur introduced disinfectant methods into hospitals and clinics to rid them of these invisible menaces. Prior to Pasteur’s work, a single dirty scalpel might have been used to perform multiple surgeries, unwittingly transferring bacteria from one patient to another, thus resulting in an extremely high death rate among surgery patients. No one had previously drawn a connection between the bacteria-laden instruments and patient deaths. After Pasteur introduced his disinfectant methods, patient death rates dropped sharply.

Continuing his research, Pasteur found that heat could destroy harmful bacteria present in cow’s milk. As a result of this discovery, millions of infants previously unable to breastfeed were saved from death, as they were able to ingest cow’s milk. The process he developed was subsequently named after him – pasteurization.

Germs in the Talmud

Remarkably, the notion of invisible harmful bacteria is mentioned in ancient Jewish texts. The Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 170:16) rules:

“A person shall not drink from a cup and then give it to another, because of life-threatening dangers.”

The Taz commentary explains this ruling based on a teaching of the Tanna Rabbi Eliezer:

“For perhaps there is an illness in his body, which might go from his mouth into the cup, making his friend ill.”

Further evidence that the sages knew of the existence of microbes and bacteria may be drawn from the following statement of the Gemara (Avoda Zara 28a), written some 1,600 years ago:

“Shmuel said: An open wound caused by a piece of iron is to be regarded as life-threatening, and one is allowed to violate Shabbat [to treat it].”

Shabbos desecration is permitted only for the purpose of treating life-threatening illnesses, and therefore, treating a simple wound is generally forbidden on Shabbos if it entails a Shabbat violation. However, when a wound was caused by a piece of iron, it should be treated even with procedures that involve Shabbat desecration, because even a superficial wound of this type can be life-threatening.

Brilliance of Our Torah Sages

Did medical experts of the time find this statement puzzling, seeing that it refers to a relatively minor wound? And why is such a wound considered life-threatening?

Today, we know that rusty iron contains bacteria that can cause a tetanus infection, also known as lockjaw, and that the entry of these bacteria into the body through even a superficial wound can ultimately be lethal. The Torah sages knew this before the advent of modern science.

Scientific opinion at the time (and till centuries later) denied any connection between superficial wounds and life-threatening illness. Indeed, before the discovery of bacteria, there was no good reason to imagine that a small wound could cause death. Non-Jewish medical experts would have claimed that the patient died from some previous, internal disease. And undoubtedly, they would not have recommended that a Jew violate Shabbat to treat a patient under such circumstances. Yet, despite the sages’ efforts to preserve the sanctity of Shabbat, they were not ready to accept the current medical opinion in this case. Their knowledge had been passed on from generation to generation, and they knew that a wound caused by iron could be life-threatening. Appropriately, they gave practical instructions to treat such a wound, big or small, on Shabbat, even if this required desecrating Shabbat, as it could cause a massive lethal infection. Eventually, scientists reached the same conclusion through their research.

Pasteurization Before Pasteur

Even more astonishingly, there is reason to believe that our sages were aware of the concept of pasteurization – the use of heat to destroy bacteria.

The Gemara (Chulin 84b) emphasizes the importance of drinking liquids only after they have been boiled:

“Rabbi Yochanan said: [Drink] a cupful of witchcraft, but not a cupful of tepid water.”

Rabbi Yochanan warns that drinking a cup of non-boiled water poses greater danger than drinking a witch’s brew. We must remember that at the time, water was drawn primarily from wells and cisterns and did not undergo the standard purification processes performed today.

Another story told in the Gemara (Bava Metzia 83b) demonstrates that the sages of the time also understood the importance of maintaining strict cleanliness during surgical procedures. Rabbi Elazar, the son of Rabbi Shimon ben Yochai, underwent an operation, whereby “he was given a sleeping draught, taken into a marble chamber and had his abdomen opened…” Note that the surgery was performed in a marble-lined room, which is easier to clean and keep dust-free. Undoubtedly, a special chamber had been designed to maintain the highest level of cleanliness, provide the proper environment for the surgery, and prevent the patient’s body from infection.

Conclusion

Thus, the sages have said: “Probe into the Torah over and over” – that is, examine it again and again as deeply as possible – “for everything is in it – for all that you need, you will find there.”

Modern Science in Ancient Texts

It is quite remarkable that through the study of the Torah, our sages that lived some 2,000 years ago, already knew the following:

* Tiny, invisible creatures exist in our natural world.

* These invisible creatures, now called bacteria, can cause the transmission of infectious diseases from one person to another.

* Bacteria are present throughout the sick person’s body – including in bodily secretions, like saliva – and not only in the affected organ.

* We should therefore be careful not to drink from someone else’s cup, in case he is sick and the bacteria in his saliva prove contagious.

* This applies regardless of whether the person is healthy or not, for a person may carry bacteria that do not harm him, but can be dangerous to other

Face Your Fears

You will probably identify with this fairly common occurrence. You are busy bustling around the house – taking care of this and that, your mind preoccupied with the multiple tasks at hand – when you suddenly turn a corner and let out a shriek of fright at the sight of an “intruder.” The startling moment, though, rapidly gives way to a feeling of intense relief, as your brain quickly processes the fact that this unexpected person is not a dangerous thief, but is a non-threatening family member. Phew!

The Relief Response

This relief response is a uniquely human characteristic according to neuropsychiatrist Dr. Katherine Brownlowe, Chief of Neurobehavioral Health at Ohio State University. “When stress activates the amygdala – it temporarily overrides conscious thought so that the body can divert all of its energy to facing the (perceived) threat,” Brownlowe said. The release of neurochemicals and hormones causes an increase in heart rate and breathing, shunts blood away from the intestines, and sends more blood to the muscles. It puts all the brain’s attention into ‘fight-or-flight’.”

But there is a difference in the ways humans and animals deal with fear. “We can get startled,” explained Brownlowe, “but instead of running away like bunny rabbits, we reassess the situation and figure out that we don’t need to respond in a ‘fight-or-flight’ manner. And then we can just get on with our day.” So that ability to take a step back and rationally assess the situation is something that sets us apart from the animal kingdom.

“Amazingly enough, a large portion of humanity seeks out fearful experiences, like riding roller coasters or viewing terrifying media programs. Is fear pleasurable for them? According to Brownlowe, no. What they are enjoying is the ensuing chemical euphoria. “Once the ‘fight-or-flight’ signals cease,” Brownlowe elaborated, “the brain releases neurotransmitters and hormones that mediate… ‘rest-and-digest’… heart rate [comes] down, breathing is slowing, goose bumps are relaxing. There’s a sense of internal cognitive relief in the body, and that feels good.”

Strategy to Calm Your Fears

Brownlowe postulates that this can help people face life’s inevitable stressors and anxieties. For example, “If you are anxious about talking to your boss about getting a raise, and then you get the [wits] scared out of you, then talking to your boss is no big deal.”

I guess Brownlowe’s motto would be: if you’re scared, scare yourself even more! This is like the desensitization component inherent in the CBT approach of psychotherapy. A noted director of a psychotherapy clinic once put it this way: “If you’re scared of spiders and are locked in a room full of spiders for a week, do you think you’ll still be scared of spiders at the end of that week?” Perhaps not, if you survive the ordeal and don’t die from fear.

The Brisker Rav’s “Ein Od Milvado” Approach

Not surprisingly, we Jews seem to have a divergent tradition in dealing with fear. “Ein od milvado” is the mantra, says Rav Chaim Volozhiner, that can trump any fearful situation. Intently focusing on the fact that there is not even one subatomic particle in the entire universe that exists without the will of its Creator, neutralizes the influence of perceived negative forces.

The Brisker Rav employed this tactic during his escape from German-conquered Poland during the Holocaust. Numerous times, doom seemed inevitable as Jews underwent German soldiers’ inspections, and the resultant release – which the Rav attributed exclusively to focusing on “ein od milvado” – was nothing short of miraculous. Tapping into the higher consciousness that there is no power whatsoever besides the Creator lifts a person above all the perilous sources of fear and propels him into a realm where the only thing that exists is the will of Hashem.

Rabbi Avigdor Miller’s Teaching – Life’s Two Roads

Of course, it’s no simple feat to emulate the Brisker Rav. Rabbi Avigdor Miller once said that life’s journey has two roads:

The super-fast highway and the slow, winding country road. The highway of life is “gam zu l’tovah”: recognizing that absolutely everything is an expression of Hashem’s will and is thus for the person’s benefit.

The low road, Rav Miller said, is “gam zeh yaavor,” this too will pass. Realizing that a negative situation – as painful, fearsome, or unpleasant as it may be – will eventually fade into the oblivion of history past.

The preferred, more efficient route is gam zu l’tovah. But not everyone can navigate that path, so Hashem gave us another, workable route called gam zeh yaavor. But there is no reason why anyone should have to resign himself to isolated mediocrity. Even while making use of lower-consciousness methods such as “this too shall pass” or “if you’re scared, scare yourself some more,” we can remain cognizant of the fact that another approach does exist.

That is the approach of gam zu l’tovah and ein od milvado. That awareness alone connects us to this superior approach and gives us a part in it. And who knows, maybe, just maybe, we will sometimes manage to infuse a bit of that higher consciousness directly into our lives.

Hiking and Bonding

Hiking and Bonding

Rabbi Topas bonding with his students.

Last month, Magen David High School students enjoyed an inspirational trip with their rebbes. Rabbi Meyer Topas brought his gemara class on a special trip to Bushkill Falls along with Rabbi E. Bitton, as a special reward for the boys’ excellent learning. They went on a 2.5-mile trail hike and were treated to beautiful scenery and waterfalls. The rabbis and students all enjoyed being together while taking in Hashem’s beautiful world! After the hike, they enjoyed a BBQ lunch at a beautiful picnic spot. A great time was had by all!

Support the SHM’s Ukraine Rescue Mission

The world has been shocked and horrified by the images of death and destruction coming out of Ukraine, in what has become the fastest growing humanitarian crisis in Europe since World War II. More than two million refugees, primarily women and children, have already fled Ukraine and many within Ukraine are also displaced.

The Sephardic Heritage Museum is conducting their own “Ukraine Rescue Mission” to try to save as many Jewish lives as possible with the help of our entire community globally.

All monies collected go directly to help our brothers and sisters in Ukraine. The funds raised will be used for evacuating families and getting them to safety and also will be used to pay for food and shelter.

As you can see in the news every day, the situation continues to get worse, if that is possible to comprehend.

All donations to help the Ukraine Rescue Mission are processed through The Sephardic Heritage Museum, and every penny of your donation goes towards this mission.

To donate funds via credit card, go to: Donate – Sephardic Heritage Museum.

To find out how to get involved, contact Rabbi Raymond Sultan at: rsultan@theshm.com.

Jewish Teenager Attacked in Midwood

A Jewish teenager walking in the heavily Jewish neighborhood of Midwood in Brooklyn, was punched in the face by an attacker because he wouldn’t say, “Free Palestine.”

The victim and his friend, both 18-year-old yeshivah students, were walking down Avenue M at approximately 2pm, when they realized they were being followed by a group of Arab teens.

One of the teens approached them and demanded that they say, “Free Palestine.” When the students ignored him, the assailant allegedly punched one of them, giving him a bloody eye.

The attacker and the other teens with him fled the scene. The victim was taken to the hospital by Hatzalah paramedics. No arrests have been made in the case.

New York State Senator Simcha Felder, who represents the neighborhood, is personally offering a $5,000 reward for information leading to the arrest and prosecution of the attacker. Felder made the announcement on Twitter, saying “Enough is enough! These attacks must end!”

The assault follows two others within the week, including an attack in the Crown Heights neighborhood of Brooklyn in which a rabbi was beaten by a man who yelled, “The Nazis should have killed you Jews.”

According to the Anti-Defamation League, the highest number of anti-Semitic attacks recorded in the United States took place last year with 2,717 reported cases, more than 330 of them occurring in New York State.

The Lighter Side – June 2022

Interview Skills

Ralph: How are the interviews going for the new insurance salesman?

Eddie: We had one very interesting applicant. Where the form requested “prior experience,” he wrote “lifeguard,” that was it, nothing else. I told him, “We’re looking for someone who can not only sell insurance, but who can sell himself – how does working as a lifeguard pertain to salesmanship?”

Ralph: So, you’re still looking to fill the position, right?

Eddie: No, we hired him.

Ralph: The lifeguard!? Why, what impressed you about his experience?

Eddie: He didn’t know how to swim.

Ezra Cohen

Exercise Visualization

A woman needed encouragement to keep pedaling the exercise bike in his gym. So my friend, the gym manager, said, “Close your eyes and imagine you’re riding along Broadway in New York City – it will be more interesting.”

Inspired, the woman cycled on, but after a minute she stopped.

“What’s wrong?” asked my friend.

She replied, “The traffic light is red.”

Ralph Ades

College Currency

Stanley: “I don’t like to brag, but I am putting two kids through college.”

Bob: “Really? I didn’t even know you had one kid, let alone two!”

Stanley: “I don’t…they both belong to my auto mechanic.”

Abe Cohen

Mixed up Math

Teacher: “Alfred, if your father had ten dollars and you asked for four dollars how much money does your dad have left?”

Alfred: “Ten.”

Teacher: “No Alfred, I’m afraid that’s not correct. The correct answer is six. It looks like you don’t know your math very well.”

Alfred: “No it’s not, the answer is ten – it looks like you don’t know my father very well!”

Aaron Yanai

The Three Swimmers

Three men each made a bet that they would be the only one with enough strength to swim 1,000 yards from one island to another. The first swimmer tried and swam 300 yards before he got tired and decided to swim back. The second man then began, and after swimming out 400 yards, he got tired and swam back. The last swimmer was confident that he would be able to complete the distance. He swam 300 yards, 500 yards, 700 yards, 900 yards, 950 yards – but then he gets tired, so he swims back.

Sol J. Wahba

Relation Ship

My friend wanted a boat more than anything. His wife was very adamantly against it. He bought it anyway. “I’ll tell you what,” he told her. “In the spirit of compromise, why don’t you name the boat?” Being a good sport, she accepted. When the husband went to the dock for his maiden voyage, the name that he saw she painted on the side was…”For Sale.”

Odette Ades

The Language of Chemistry

Teacher: Billy, what is the chemical formula for water?

Billy: H I J K L M N O.

Teacher: What are you talking about?

Billy: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.

Rachel Grazi

Bug Spray Store

I went to a store to buy insecticide. “Is this good for beetles?” I asked the clerk.

“No,” he replied. “It’ll kill them.”

Pauleen Hazan

The Automatic Signal

I noticed that we’re really living in an automated society – especially in New York City. It seems that anywhere in the city, whenever a traffic signal light turns green, it automatically activates the horn of the car behind you.

Jack V. Grazi

Wait and Waiter

Barry was at his favorite eatery when he called over the waiter. “Yes?” asked the busy waiter. “Are you sure you’re the waiter I ordered from?” asked Barry. “Yes, why do you ask?” replied the waiter. “Because,” he quipped, “I was expecting a much older man by now.”

David I. Bergman

The Chicken Coup

A woman walked into a store and requested a chicken. The butcher, who only had one bird left, didn’t want the woman to think that she was getting leftover stock; so, he reached into his ice box and pulled out the lone chicken without letting on that it was the last one.

“That one is too skinny, do you have one a little larger?” she asked.

“Of course,” said the butcher. He took the chicken behind the counter, away from view and made a lot of noise rolling it around the ice as if he were searching for just the right chicken. He then pulled out the same chicken and showed it to her.

“Better,” she said. “Do you have one that’s a little prettier?”

The butcher took the chicken, rolled it in the ice again and offered it up a third time.

“Great,” the woman said. Relieved and proud of his clever ploy, the butcher was about to wrap the bird up for the lady when she said… “I’ll take all three.”

David Djmal

Patient

After finally being called in to see the doctor, Joe was led into a room and told to remove his shoes. The nurse asked him to step on the scale and said, “I need to get your weight today.”

Without hesitation, Joe replied, “One hour and 45 minutes!”

Isaac Sutton

Hygiene High Jinks

At a recent lunch by the local sandwich shop, I watched the woman behind the counter spreading mayonnaise on my bread, and noticed part of her stained work shirt was dragging across it. “Excuse me,” I called, “your sleeve is in the mayo.”

“Don’t worry,” she assured me, “I need to wash it anyway.”

Albert C.

Budget Pilots

As the passengers on the budget airline prepared for departure, two blind men with dark glasses and wearing pilot uniforms board the plane. As they make their way through the aisle, one is using a guide dog, and the other using a walking stick, nervous laughter spreads through the cabin. When the men enter the cockpit and the engines start up, the passengers begin glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a practical joke.

 

Moments later, the plane begins speeding faster and faster down the runway. Soon, the people sitting in the window seats realize that they’re headed straight for freeway at the edge of the airport. As it begins to look as though the plane will plough into traffic, panicked screams fill the cabin. At that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.

The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly and soon all retreat into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the plane is in good hands.

In the cockpit, one of the blind pilots turns to the other and says, “Ya know, Bob, one of these days, they’re gonna scream too late…”

Joey Harary